mlroseplant

It has been a mixed week, both in the professional world, and the heeling world. In the professional world, my job got shut down for the week because of safety concerns, and I have spent the last two days in safety meetings, trying to figure out how to solve the problem. No one at our site has had a serious injury, the worst was a broken finger, but several near misses were quite alarming.

In the heeling world, I have gotten more reaction than usual, both positive and negative. It's been hot here. Very hot. I can't quite bear to put on long pants to go out in the world outside of work, where they are required. But then, at work, sweating profusely is almost a requirement. Certainly an expectation. I've said it before, and I'll say it again, if you want people to notice your heels, wear them with shorts. I got an unsolicited comment the other night from a lady who was watering her garden as I was walking by on the sidewalk in front of her house. She said she liked my shoes, and that they made my legs look fantastic. I didn't quite know how to take that, so I just simply laughed heartily and thanked her. Twice. I did not stop walking, so we didn't have any sort of true conversation. At the other end of the spectrum, within a couple of days after that, I was mildly heckled by not one, but several groups of people. But they were all teenagers, all in cars. It still bothers me a little, but not like it used to. All I can say is, my son better not be out and about behaving like that, or there will be hell to pay. Actually, I'm quite sure he's not.

I hope you all have had a great week, but I'll be honest--I'm glad this week is over.

Hey there TBG, I hope your situation continues to improve. At least the back issues have not affected your ability to play. If you were an organist, that might be a different story.

It's amazing how much of the world people don't notice. My wife and I were at a backyard barbecue recently. Because I knew I would be spending 95% of my time on grass, I chose to wear the Sbicca Tristan wedges pictured below. Many of the guests have seen me in heels before, so I got zero comments. No big deal.

There was one head-scratching conversation, though. My wife and I were talking with a lady who was probably in her late 50s. The lady complimented my wife on her shoes, which were busy, strappy, lace-up sandals (sorry, no picture). She asked my wife where she got them, but before she could answer,  my wife happened to turn her foot to the side, revealing a very low block heel, certainly no more than 2 inches. The lady interrupted her and said, "Oh, those are heels. I can't do heels. My style is more like his sandals (pointing to my feet). A couple of simple straps that you just slip on."

Neither my wife nor I said anything, and the subject quickly changed to something else. But I couldn't help but wonder how she missed the giant 4 1/2 inch wedges on my shoes. I wouldn't have thought it possible, but it must be the case. I wonder what else people don't notice, even when they're paying attention?

9 hours ago, Tech said:

All said as Banter between friends... This is a hobby, not a job, so shouldnt be taken so seriously.

Nobody was knocking the fact that he chose to wear heels, only the choice of heels..

No different to any of your mates rocking up in a new hat that just looks terrible.. You not having a crack at them for wearing a hat, but you will have a crack at them if it clearly doesnt fit properly at all and is covered in plastic fruit and noisy bells to go for a quiet drink in the pub...

If your friend says they are getting rid of their crazy hat collection, you might say "Good idea, they looked mental anyway"..

Your not saying "Yeah hats are not for you", your just saying "THOSE style of hats have there place, and you are never in it"

Now that is the most sensible thing you've said in months.  .  . errrrrr, mate!

2 hours ago, Shyheels said:

Men in heels, or tall boots, are never portrayed in any way a regular guy on the street would ever be able to relate to, or want to relate to. It is invariably some weird androgynous look. . .   

My thoughts exactly. They always look weird. I'm sure that the general public might describe any one of us using that word, but I guarantee that we look better than these guys. 

I went to a bar last night with a few friends and coworkers to see our friend and coworker play with his band. As usual, I debated heavily about what to wear. In the end, I decided upon skinny-ish, dressy-ish pants with a polo shirt, and Michael Kors Oksana sandals in black, sporting 5 inch stiletto heels. Unfortunately, no pictures showing the shoes were taken, but it's basically the same outfit pictured below.

Two of my coworkers had never seen me in heels before, but my reputation has preceded me, and one of them either didn't notice, or didn't react. At all. The other one, a female, expected and anticipated my appearance, and reacted enthusiastically. In fact, she was my "bodyguard" the rest of the night, glaring at anybody who reacted to me with anything but a pleasant face. I really didn't notice anybody myself, except for three youngish men, who appeared to disapprove of my appearance, but who knows? They could have been discussing something else. It's unimportant. They did not approach me in any case, even though they were seated at an adjacent table.

Upon entering the establishment, I was immediately approached by a couple of women in their 40s who asked me how I could possibly walk in those shoes. We had a pleasant, if overly earnest, conversation about sexual orientation and gender identity. I think that I educated at least two people about such matters anyhow. One of the women showed me a nasty scar, a wound received "the last time I ever wore heels in my life." Evidently, she had fallen while wearing stilettos, and swore them off after that. I can't help but think that somehow alcohol was involved. The discussion then turned to eyebrow tattoos, as my female coworker had recently had her eyebrows tattooed in. The rest of the evening was fairly uneventful. 

I'm glad I decided to go with the heels, because every time I resign myself to flats, I always regret it. I don't ever feel right wearing flats. 

Also pictured below are my "bodyguard" and my pedal steel guitar playing coworkers. 

2 hours ago, Mr. X said:

It can be done, but only the right kind of heel will pull off the look successfully.

I have done the wedge thing with shorts too!  But I dont neccessarily consider that to be "heels".  When I say "heels and shorts"  I mean an actual thin heel.  Like a stiletto or something along those lines.  I don't see that much on women.  Especially around these parts!  It is usually a flat shoe like flip flops or something paired with shorts.

I think it's something that has become much more accepted in the mainstream fairly recently. And for some reason, it seems to be much more popular, at least here in the Midwest U.S., with Asian and Latina women.

My Vietnamese friend wears heels with shorts quite often, and I think it looks great! She did not do this just a few short years ago. Pun intended  

I realize that this is a general poll, but the reason I didn't put public full time is because I simply can't wear heels at work, as it isn't allowed in construction. Otherwise, I'm pretty much in heels all the time.

On 6/23/2016 at 2:39 PM, Rockpup said:

This is Florida. I've worn a suit 3 times in 15 years, my wedding, a friends wedding, and court

You are also not required to wear a jacket and a tie. You would be if you were a professional male classical musician, even in Florida!

But while we're on the subject of fancy dress, to get back to the original subject, isn't it funny how men aren't allowed to wear open toed shoes with formal dress, and women are? I can't imagine wearing sandals with a suit and tie, much less a tuxedo. It would look funny, I should think. To be fair, in a concert-type situation, there is often a prohibition against open toed shoes for the women, as well.

I am struggling with this one. On the one hand, it goes without saying that you should respect the couple's wishes, but if they know you already.  .  . well, let's put it this way, if it were me, whoever it was would say, "Could you please just wear normal men's shoes to our wedding?" and that would be the end of it. This has actually happened before (not at a wedding, however).

On the other hand, it's not like you're trying to upstage the bride or ruin her day. It's not like you're planning on wearing something so outrageous that the whole crowd will turn as one and forget why they are there for a moment or two. In fact, since you're wearing 100% normal men's clothing (except for shoes), I bet a healthy percentage of the guests won't even notice. There's a small part of me that gets riled up trying to imagine a situation where a woman would need to ask permission to wear something to a wedding. You're the one who knows these people. You'll have to make a judgment call on this one yourself.

Oh, and there's no way in hell I would ever wear those stiletto heels if I knew I was going to be on turf for more than just a few minutes, dry or not. There's just too much that can go wrong. If nothing else, I wouldn't want to take a chance on ruining my nice shoes.

Good luck to you, and let us know how things turn out! Don't leave us hanging, now.  .  .

On June 24, 2016 at 10:23 PM, Mr. X said:

Time for a new outing report.  I had planned on going out tonight but the extra warm weather just made my decision that much easier.  And to say the weather was nice was an understatement.  I arrived home around 9pm and the temperature was still 26 celcius.  Or 80 for you fahrenheit people.  Plus I had a recently purchased pair of sandals that I hadn't "broken in" yet.  So it seemed like a good time to do just that!  The outing itself was short and uneventful so I won't bother discussing it.  Lets get to the outfit and pics.

The Outfit
1) Brown t-shirt with thin colored lines
2) denim capris
3) brown leather handbag
4) Spring brand gladiator style sandals with double ankle straps and near 4" heel

And now, for Post No. 3 in a row! First, let me say that I think your outfit looks nice. At least in the summer, your style and mine are somewhat similar, except for the handbag. 

I was just wondering, do you ever wear shorts with heels? As we have discussed before, I don't feel I look good in capris, but I do think I look good in shorts, and I wear them often. Trouble is, I get a lot of unwanted attention when I wear shorts with heels, so many times, I will opt for flat sandals if I have to run to the grocery store or something. Or I'll put on long pants with heels. I find I get waaaay less attention either way. 

I would think capris would be about the same on a guy, as far as undesired attention. Does this ever weigh on your mind when you are deciding what you will wear? It seems so much easier in the wintertime. 

12 hours ago, Gudulitooo said:

Mr X,

Nice outfit. Are these your hair that we see ? How do you wear them ?

Sorry to stomp on this thread, Mr. X, but since I am married to a non-native English speaker, I immediately knew was was happening here. 

Gudulitooo, "hair" is a very strange sort of noun in English. It's not really what we call a collective noun, but we generally treat it as such, so we usually refer to it in the singular. Which means, what we would usually say is, "Is this your hair that we can see? How do you wear it?" 

I hope this clears up any confusion. 

9 hours ago, Jamie001 said:

I love your choice of sandals, however if you really want to improve the look with sandals i suggest a professional pedicure with fire engine red nail polish. You can never go wrong with red toenails and you will get a lot of compliments.

Red toenails ain't everybody's thing. Well-groomed feet, yes. I do my own ever since my favorite nail tech quit the shop. But polish? I think it's a matter of personal taste. I actually prefer natural nails, even on women.

It does seem that there is a buzz about gender fluidity in the media these days, mainly due to U.S. politics, but like Chorlini, I haven't seen ANY of it in my town, which is also a university town. I am the only man I've ever met who wears heels. Period. I expect to die being the only man in this town who wears heels. Although I am well accepted by a surprising demographic of people, not one of my male friends or aquaintances has ever shown the slightest interest in wearing heels.

However (brightening up a bit), I have managed to influence the women in my life somewhat. Two of my aquaintances who never wore heels just had to try them after seeing me constantly in heels, and now both wear them occasionally. A third woman has turned from an occasional heel wearer into a regular heel wearer under my influence.

If I'm any influence on guys, I'm certainly unaware of it. I imagine most of them simply think, "That Melrose, he a weird dude, but he's all right."

9 hours ago, Pumped said:

I wonder if the short shorts got to them or...?  When I looked the sandals they are pretty generic so I don't think it was the sandals, but perhaps the combination of the two?

My thoughts exactly, from personal experience. 

13 hours ago, Shyheels said:

Interesting point. One I never thought of, being able to play only the radio myself. But looking at the two photos one could readily imagine the sleeves on the jacket intruding themselves on the man's ease of play. As to your playing better without the accoutrements, do you play better in practice? I am assuming you don't dress up to the nines in practice (I mean at home, not rehearsals)

It's really impossible to say, as practicing at home or even rehearsing is far different than an actual performance. The nervousness and adrenaline rush associated with a performance make it impossible to compare formal dress with casual dress. Usually, if the technical ability is there, the performance is superior to the rehearsal. I just idly wondered if it made any sort of difference. 

To slightly offset the subject, don't even get me started about dress codes in the classical music world. I'm a cellist, and it would be nice to have a little bit more freedom in the arms. Below are two examples of what men are required to wear, versus what women are allowed to wear. 

I was browsing through a cello forum a couple of weeks ago, and some woman commented that she cannot play in anything with sleeves. I thought to myself, "Oh, puleeze! Try playing in both a long sleeved shirt plus a jacket!" I wonder if I would play incrementally better if I were not somewhat fettered by my clothing. 

 Today was the primary for our local, state, and federal party nominees.  I figured this was a good outfit to show up in at the polling place.  I was kind of late showing up, so there was nobody there except for the election officials, no drama. 

Thanks! They are Michael Kors Oksana sandals. Just a tidge over 5" heels. 

2 hours ago, Mr. X said:

Thanks for the compliments!  And your are not prying at all.  I stand around 5'7 and my shoe size is anywhere from a 9 to a 10 depending on the shoe.

Well, drat! You and I are within an inch of the same height, and basically the same shoe size. I just have really short legs. I guess I'll just have to accept the fact that capris don't look all that great on me. Rock on, brother! 

A summer Sunday outfit. It feels a little ho-hum. Still, here I am. 

On May 30, 2016 at 9:23 PM, Mr. X said:

Another day, another outing.  I was planning on going out tonight.  The warm weather we had just made my decision easier.  Plus the weather allowed me to show a little more skin then I have in past outings.

The outing was short and sweet and went off without a hitch.  The only downside is that the shoes I wore need to be fixed now.  I wore my recently purchased "Fergie" wedges.  One of the straps connected to the side that holds the ankle in place has come loose.  There is a hole on the side where the strap fits in.  It looks like it was in there with just tape and/or glue.  I am going to take it somewhere to be fixed as I don't expect it to be a costly or difficult repair.  I will show a pic here to maybe get some insight from others.  I have only worn the shoes twice and they quicly became a favorite of mine.  They will be great to wear in the summer months with my various outfits.  But enough talk, lets get to the outfit and pics.

The outfit
1) ladies brown t-shirt with thin colored stripes
2) knee length jean capris
3) fergalicious by fergie 5 inch wedges
4) brown and gold handbag

And now for the pics.  One is the outfit and the other is the broken shoe strap.  Comments and suggestion are welcome.  Thanks in advance!

If I may pry, how tall are you, Mr. X? I have a similar outfit that I've never worn in public because I just don't like the way it looks on me. I feel the tight capris make my legs look extremely short, but they look just fine on you. I assume your shoe size is U.S. 10 or smaller, as you seem to be able to get a good variety of brands. Just curious. 

On May 29, 2016 at 11:23 AM, Thighbootguy said:

????? what radically 

Congratulations on your anniversary.  Heeling is a great way to get up in the world.

 

HA! Ok, point taken. And thank you!

4 hours ago, swedeheeler said:

Cowhide boots

Thank you for good advices  I'm actually checking out for those cow hair boots in black and white and ordering a 4 inch heel. If i can get'em as in image 9 they can be subtle as I having a pair bootcut jeans over the shafts. Or am I totally lost?

Should i go for knee high or higher as well? I love wearing tigh high at home

It may be that this thread has taken a left hand turn (changed subjects suddenly). That happens sometimes. I am not sure if this is one of those times. 

I think the boots you are considering are just fine and dandy, but if you're looking for a pair of boots to wear out in public that nobody will notice, these ain't it! 

If you want to be low profile, much as I hate to say it at this time of year, your options are pretty much boots, boots, or boots. You could go with an oxford, but for better or for worse, I think boots are considered more "manly," and you can get away with a much higher heel than you could with any other style without it even registering with people. 

Yes, I can understand TBG's point, but not all of us feel like being noticed, and certainly not all of the time. I don't always have the energy to wear exactly what I want every time I want. I do wear heels every time I go out (with some special exceptions), but much of the time, I still wear the same boot-cut jeans I started with 4 years ago. Only the heels have gotten higher and more feminine.

This past year, I have put more narrowly cut pants and even shorts into the mix, but I find I am definitely noticed more when I wear these, particularly the shorts. I think the pants make more difference than the shoes. As you become more confident in your heels, you can get more daring with showing them off. 

One photo is "stealth mode," and the other is "Look at me, yes I am dressed like a Vietnamese girl going to the movies with her boyfriend, and I like it!"