mlroseplant

I used to have the same problem as you, but maybe not as severe. I started off in very moderate heel heights, not because I couldn't wear higher, but because I wasn't brave enough to do so in public. As I got bolder, of course I bought higher and higher shoes, until one day, I bought a pair of shoes that I thought I could never really wear. They're not all that impressive by the numbers--4 1/4 inch heel, no platform, but last summer, my toes and ankles would ache quite badly after walking in them only a few city blocks. They fit well, but they were just too high for me.

 

Still, I did not give up on them. over the course of several months, I worked my way from being able to walk only a short distance to being able to walk quite a long way and/or wear them all day. In fact, they are now one of my more comfortable pairs of shoes. It can be done, but it is a long process. I am now working my way up to 5 inch and 5 1/4 inch. The limiting factor is ankle flexibility. However, I've made significant progress, and I am very close to being ready to wear such high shoes in public. Good luck!

I don't mean to rain on your parade, and I understand your limitations, but there is a big difference between walking around the house and walking outside. I can't tell you the number of times I have felt confident in the house, only to turn around after one block outside, thinking, "I need a little more practice in these." This usually happens with shoes that don't really fit me right, or shoes that are just too high for me at this time.

Believe me, it is a very bad feeling to be at the far end of a shopping mall, and your only thought is, "Will I be able to make it back to the car?"

I have the luxury of living in a place where I can walk outside late at night or early in the morning in relative privacy. Because I can practice beforehand, I know I can make it back to the car looking good and feeling good. Walking in these crazy shoes is an athletic challenge, and, as men, I think most of us embrace this challenge. Good luck in your endeavors!

Ah, Stilettos are a great way to get up in the world.

I'm not sure what you are referring to with, "the top lifts wear out much faster". If your'e referring to th heel tips, have your cobbler flair the tip when he replaces them. The tip will look like an inverter "Y". The flairing is not realy noticable but it doubles the life of the tip.

TBG, yes, you are correct in your assumption. I believe that "top lift" is the term of art for "heel tip" in the shoe repair trade. Somebody correct me if I am wrong.

You may recall my story of my new Aldo boots and the broken heel, which was successfully repaired. My cobbler did as you suggested without me asking, and so far, after several miles of practice, the wear is negligible. Not only that, but I feel much more confident walking in these boots now, and I think the time is near when they will make their public debut.

Highly recommended. The 1st picture caught me with an odd stare, sorry.

I was just discussing this very subject only this morning. Self portraiting can be a tricky business. You won't hear any criticism from me on this point. Awesome shoes!

After 2 1/2 years of public heeling, I have finally embraced the stiletto heel. Pictured below is my stiletto collection. I still have not worn the pair on the extreme right, because I am still working my way up to them. At 5 1/4 inches, they are not yet ready for public consumption.

I wore the middle pair (Guess ankle boots with 4 1/2 inch heels) to a dentist appointment today, with tight boot cut jeans and a black merino wool turtleneck sweater. Nobody mentioned my shoes, even though they were in plain sight.

Yeah, stilettos are more of a pain in the neck, because the top lifts wear out much faster, and you can catch the heel in a crack in the sidewalk if you are not careful, but I still love them. They are not nearly as hard to walk in as their reputation might suggest.

I voted for very slowly, because I buy shoes for the long haul. However, there are some exceptions, because my tastes have changed over the last two years, when I started heeling publicly. I keep rediscovering shoes in my collection, and I often ask myself, "Why don't I wear these more often?"

Some of my older shoes have become "unloved sisters" for various reasons.

3. Consider carefully the mileage you put on. They won't last forever. I foolishly wore mine to a Walk a Mile in Her Shoes event. I wish I had that mile back.

Wow, they wore out in only one mile? That certainly wouldn't work for me, as I have a two mile rule about shoes I am willing to keep. If I can't work my way up to two miles in reasonable comfort, they're gone.

I recently bought a pair of Aldo boots that have quite a thin heel, 1/4 inch. I had some issues with these boots, one of the heels was broken, and I had it repaired, and I had the heel tips replaced. My cobbler put slightly oversized top lifts on, without me asking, as Thighbootguy suggested elsewhere, and I have walked 2.5 miles in them without any significant wear on the top lifts.

From prior experience, I think in can expect 20+ miles before I need to replace the top lifts again.

I hear ya, brother. I got heckled by a carful of teenaged boys in the grocery store parking lot one evening last summer. I was wearing shorts that were close fitting, but not that tight, and not that short, with somewhat thicker than stiletto heeled sandals and a close fitting t-shirt. They evidently didn't have the balls to actually stop and talk to me, but it really took the wind out of my sails for a couple of days.

I went to get a haircut the next day, and the older lady who usually cuts my hair asked why I wasn't wearing heels. I told her that I didn't have the mental energy to be gawked at today. She seemed surprised that somebody was giving me a hard time, and said that people should be able to wear what they want. That gave me the confidence to put the heels back on, but I didn't wear the shorts/heels combo very much more after that incident. However, since that time, I rarely leave the house in less than a 4 inch heel, unless I'm going to work.

There will be other, more pleasant heeling days in the future. Hang in there!

I have no idea how you get no reaction, Jeff. If I wear anything more daring than block heels with boot cut jeans, I get gawked at constantly. I have been honked at, wolf whistled at, and followed around with a camera. Of course, most of this has happened in a small town on a Friday night. And to be fair, I've had positive reactions, too.

So come visit me, and I guarantee you'll get noticed. Nice outfit, by the way!

It really seems like a shame to not show off those gorgeous boots. I fully understand the difference an extra half inch of heel can make but with a lot of practice your ankle may tolerate the angle. Give it some time, then give the folks in the grocery something to notice .

TBG

I think there may be hope. I took another walk in the boots a couple days ago at 4:30 in the morning (so that I could get some practice in relative privacy), and I made it 1.3 miles without too much achiness. I noticed, however, that I was slightly slouching as I walked, and had to consciously make myself stand up straight several times. I suppose this is because I am at the limit of what I can do, steepness-wise. I think I will stick to wearing them semi-privately until I work my way up to 2 miles without looking like a clumsy idiot. But I feel much better about my purchase than I did before.

Are boots actually bigger than shoes? I normally take a U.S. women's size 9 in shoes than I can wear with thin socks, or even trouser socks, but the few boots I have bought seem to have run large. Let me give you a couple of examples:

When I bought my first pair of Via Spiga boots on eBay, I was a little worried that they would be too small, as my ex-wife always shied away from Via Spiga, saying they ran small and narrow. I bought some 300 dollar boots for 50 dollars (and they are perhaps the most beautiful boots I've ever owned). When they arrived, I pulled on some trouser socks, hoping they wouldn't be too small. They were way big. I put on some merino wool socks that I normally wear with my construction work boots, and they fit perfectly. Later on, I found some Via Spiga loafer pumps with the same exact heel/hidden platform, and I figured I better go down a half size (to 8 1/2), to wear with thin socks or barefoot. Guess what? They were too small. I found another similar pair in size 9, and they fit well with thin socks.

I had a similar experience with Aldo. I own a pair of size 40 stiletto heeled oxfords that are so close fitting, I must wear trouser socks with them. That's not to say they are uncomfortable. I've worn the heck out of them, enough that I've had them re-heeled twice. They are darn near my favorite pair of shoes. So when I saw a pair of Aldo stiletto heeled boots on eBay in size 40, I bought them immediately. However, much to my surprise, they were big on me. Back to the thick, wool socks.

The Simply Vera Wang boots I used to own that I wore thin socks with were size 8 1/2.

So, is this a thing? Are boots bigger than shoes in general?

How was it broken? Did your cobbler replace the entire heel? Seems inexpensive to me. Take some pics with them on.

The entire heel was coming loose from the sole of the shoe. The cobbler said that there is a screw that holds the heel on, and it was stripped out. Now it is solid, even more so than the other "good" heel.

 

I am somewhat discouraged, because although they fit well and are quite comfortable to wear around the house, I find that out in the real world, they are a bit too steep for me at this time, due to lack of ankle flexibility. It's amazing how much of a difference half an inch heel height can make in wearability/walkability. So for the present time, I aspire to these boots, but I don't think I'll be taking them for a spin at the grocery store anytime soon.

I am happy to see that you look just fine, because that is an outfit much like something I am often seen in, right down to the boots. In fact, at first I thought you had stolen my boots, until I remembered that I had to retire my Vera Wang boots a few months ago. Those were my first pair of high heeled boots, and I rather liked them a lot. Their downfall turned out to be the fact that they are not incredibly durable, but what do you expect for 40 bucks? They certainly look a lot more expensive than 40 bucks, and mine served me well, up to the point of falling apart. I like them because they're kinda girly, but yet not somehow?

 

It is so much easier to go out in heels when you're with your wife (or kids, if applicable). Do this as much as you can. It will build your confidence. It can be somewhat more difficult when you are by yourself.

 

I see you have posted something else while I was writing this. The second outfit looks quite nice, also. I guess I can see what you mean about the color and your skin, but it certainly doesn't bother me. I must also compliment you on your confindence to wear such feminine shoes with skinny jeans. It took me about 2 years of public heeling to get to that point, and I still don't have the energy to pull it off all the time, and I wear heels publicly almost every day.

 

Let us know how it goes in the future.

One for Aldo, one for Guess! Thanks, guys. SleekHeels, it IS a little bit different to have the zips on the outside, but it doesn't bother me I guess (no pun intended).

After several emails, I'm convinced that the seller didn't know about the broken heel. He was a man, supposedly selling his wife's shoes (I think this is actually true), and he says he didn't know about it. Even *I* didn't discover it until I actually walked outside, and then that tiny bit of odd wear on the left top lift suddenly made perfect sense.

The seller was willing to give me a full refund or pay to have them repaired. Because of my work schedule (I basically have to be rained out to make it to the cobbler shop), and the fact that we're not talking about a great deal of money here, I finally just told the seller to not worry about it any more, he'd been real decent about the whole thing, and that I'd left him positive feedback.

Now I just wish it would stop raining so hard so I can know for sure how they walk!

This is a very difficult question for me to answer, because I really don't know myself. I am heterosexual, (mostly) happily married, have a kind of a macho job as an industrial electrician, but I generally hate the way most men look, and strive to do the opposite for my own look. Well, I should not say the opposite, but I have definite likes and dislikes.

I like many things girly, especially high heels. On the one hand, I definitely feel way hotter in heels, though I'm sure the rest of the world doesn't see it that way. But on the other hand, there's a golden band to remind me of someone who would not understand.....oh wait. Sorry, I forgot where I was. But on the other hand, I also view wearing high heels as an athletic challenge, a hurdle to be overcome. I actually go for regular walks in all my shoes, and record the distance. I have goals for upping the heel height and be able to do it in comfort. To me, that's kind of a masculine thing to do. My women friends who marvel at my endurance in heels don't really seem to understand this athletic, and to me, masculine side of it.

I have taken this gender-bender thing about as far as I want to. I shave my legs. I shave the upper part of my chest. I wear short shorts. I wear women's jeans and t-shirts. I wear high heels pretty much every chance I get, every day. Even my work boots have 2 1/4 inch heels.

But on the other hand, there's a golden band--damn you, Randy Travis! LOL. On the other hand, I have short hair, I sometimes grow a beard in the winter (and probably will this year, due to my soon to be cold, COLD job), I don't wear makeup, don't wear nail polish, have no desire to wear skirts or dresses.

Masculine, feminine? You tell me. I yam wot I yam.

I have been looking for the perfect pair of boots for quite some time, and I still haven't found them. However, as winter is rapidly approaching, I didn't let that stop me. I wound up buying not one, but two pairs of boots on eBay. Both of them are going to work out in their own way.

The first pair pictured are Aldo. I don't know the model, but they are taller and way thinner than what I was expecting. The heel is a full 5 inches, and it is literally the size of a pencil. I do not yet know what they are like comfort-wise, because I didn't get 2 city blocks in them before I realized something was terribly wrong. The left heel was broken, and I didn't notice it until I lengthened my stride outside. My cobbler fixed them for $6.36, tax included. I shall report further once this rain stops.

The other pair I got while the first pair was at the cobbler. It's probably just in my nature to be impulsive about things like this, but I got to thinking that while the first pair was pretty cool, these little ankle boots looked a whole lot more practical. They are Guess brand (again, I have no idea what model), have a 4 1/2 inch heel, and are a dream to walk in. In fact, they felt so nice that I broke my rule about rigorously testing a new pair of shoes before I'll wear them in public. With these, I jumped in the car and went right to the grocery store to pick up a few things. Later, I went on a walk around the neighborhood. These booties are going to work out just fine. However, I did dick up one of the heels right away, stepping in a crack. I'm not really used to stilettos and being careful of things like that.

It looks all right to me. Well, it ought to--I am often seen out and about in a very similar outfit with eerily similar boots, only mine are very dark brown.

Well, stair, actually. It was about 6 a.m. this morning, I was, as usual, on the verge of running late to work. I was just about to slip out of my Steve Madden mules (which are among my least practical shoes, and I suppose that's why I love wearing them so much) and put on my work boots, when I realized I had forgotten something in the basement. Being in rather a hurry, I wasn't being really careful, and I caught my heel on the threshold of the final doorway into the basement. I fell on my hands and knees. Luckily, there is only one more step down to the floor of the basement at that point, and I wasn't really hurt at all. Still, it could have easily gone the other way.

With great privilege comes great responsibility. Let's be careful out there. Not timid, but careful, ok?

Included with this post is a sort of re-enactment of what happened, minus me. And I can also see that these shoes could really use some attention. They're beginning to look a little beat up from this angle. They are well-loved.

I exercise in heels all the time. I take daily walks (weather permitting) of 1 to 3 miles in heels. It's also a good way to weed out the shoes that don't fit right.

I don't think I could pull that off, but you certainly do. The only thing I wonder about is what is going on with the shirt? Is it supposed to be tucked in, or not? It looks like it's about half and half. I'm thinking tucked with that extremely short jacket. Other than that, I have no comments. Oh yeah, "How do you walk in those shoes?" Hahahaha.

I'm not 100% sure what you are asking about, but I don't see any problem with any of it, at least not as far as shock value. Maybe the makeup, depending on how heavily you apply it. I wouldn't hesitate to wear anything you have described to any function, well, 'ceptin' the makeup, it's just not my thing.

You got some really nice looking boots there. I can't imagine that you will get any comments about the height of the heel. To me, they look almost like Latin dancing shoes.

You gave me some good ideas. I'm really stuck in a fashion rut. Maybe I'll try some different colored shirts and a vest.

Even though I wouldn't wear it myself, I hope your wife agrees to let you wear eye makeup. I know very well about a wife putting the nix on certain things. ^^

I guess you know what you like.

I also worked my way up gradually. Here is the beginning of my high heel journey, and I hope it helps you get an idea of how long it really took me to feel truly comfortable wearing heels every day physically. It did not happen in a matter of weeks. Complete with photos, so you can see exactly the kind of shoes I started in.

 

(Photo 1) I wore 2 1/2" clogs with a platform for quite a number of years before my true "heeling days," because I figured that was the most I could get away with. I don't really consider these "heels," but they have a slight elevation of close to 2", certainly more than men's chef-type clogs, and I think wearing these was very helpful to get used to the feel of wearing heels. In addition to getting used to a little bit of height, even these lowish-heeled clogs are quite useful to learn to deal with things like stepping on rocks and uneven pavement, as they react much more like a high heel to such obstacles than does a sneaker. Pictured are the latest (and best) iteration of this style of shoe that I've owned, Sofft Camden. I still use these some for yardwork and other such things, as the heel does not sink into soft earth so easily.

 

(Photo 2) Later, when I got braver, I moved up to basically the same shoe, but with a 3 1/2" heel instead of 2 1/2", Sofft model Aviano.  I really loved the extra height, but even with all that experience wearing the lower-heeled clogs, I found these new shoes to be somewhat of a challenge. These are also the shoes in which I officially made my public heeling debut back in May of 2012. I had these as my only pair of heels for about 6 months, and I was in them at every opportunity at home. I wasn't confident enough to wear them everywhere back then, but I still wore them so much that I had to have them reheeled. I'll probably always keep them for nostalgic reasons, but lately I don't wear them too much because I've moved on style-wise, and height-wise.

 

(Photo 3) Around Thanksgiving of 2012, I found these Sbicca Hutton clogs on Amazon, and something about them grabbed me. I just had to have them. They somehow seemed plain enough that I thought I could get away with wearing them in public. I also loved the fact that they had a super tall (or so it seemed to me back then) 4 1/2" heel. With the 1" platform, the effective elevation is 3 1/2", not a great deal steeper than my Sofft Avianos I'd been wearing every chance I could for the previous 6 months, so it didn't take long to get used to the new, higher shoes. They are still my winter "house" shoes and messing around in the garage shoes. l don't wear them out much any more because I now prefer to wear something slightly more feminine and less clunky.

 

I could go on ad nauseum about my high heeled journey, but I want to emphasize that it has taken years to get where I am physically. There is no way I could have started out wearing the shoes pictured in your avatar without some serious pain. Today, as long as they fit right (and I've found that you have to be very, very picky about fit in a high heel), they would be no problem for me to wear all day and still be smiling at the end of the day. Don't give up, my friend, just be patient.

I have never carried a pair of "backup" shoes, but I also don't own any shoes that I can't walk in for at least 2 miles in reasonable comfort. Actually, that's not technically true, as I do own a couple of 5 1/2 inchers that I'm still working up to, but that's not really the subject of the poll.

I have found that it's a good idea to carry a couple of band aids (sticking plasters) with me just in case, because sometimes, for reasons that I can't really explain, shoes that I thought were my friends can suddenly turn on me. This happens very infrequently and seemingly randomly, and I'm at a loss to explain it. Perhaps my feet are somehow sensitive to my mood.

I've never had a big mishap, like a heel breaking, but one time when I was walking a good distance in some rather high (nearly 5 inch) "Candies" type mules, both insoles came unglued and started scrunching up under the balls of my feet. There was nothing to be done but suck it up and find the shortest way home. I expect that the maker of the shoes (Steve Madden, the model is "Crunk") never expected anyone to walk any sort of distance in them. They have since been successfully repaired. So far.

As far as having a pair of flats for confidence, just in case I chicken out, that's never been an issue for me, so I did not participate in the poll, as there was no appropriate choice.

I have "fast shoes" and I have "slow shoes." I suppose it depends on what your definition of "fast" is. I guess I walk rather fast (or so I'm told), and I love seeing fast walking gals in heels, which would necessarily involve taking longer strides.

"Fast" to me is 17-18 minute miles, which is honestly not all that fast. I don't really like walking much faster than that barefoot or in trainers. "Slow" to me is 21-22 minute miles. And you might be surprised to discover which are my fast shoes, and which are the slow ones.