mlroseplant

I hate to admit it, but I chickened out last night. Once a month, there is a fairly sizable motorcycle rally in our town. A male friend and I decided to go on the spur of the moment, to drink some beer and see the sights.

I had been working all day outside in oppressive heat, and I decided I didn't have the energy to be the recipient of any unwanted attention, so I chose my leather flip flops instead of heels. The flip flops are thin strapped and thin soled, and are slightly girly anyway. Paired with skinny jeans and a deep royal purple t-shirt, I was not exactly "normal" for that lot, but I didn't get any stares that I noticed. Of course, I was walking around with a big muscle bound guy wearing a tank top with pink flamingos on it, so that's to be expected. He got all the attention.

I did notice that I really don't feel all that comfortable in flats any more, and I kind of wish I had worn heels after all, but oh well. There were quite a few gals in heels out there to look at. Some of them even looked tasteful. Not all, however. Consider the venue.

How ironic. Now that I've started my own thread, I find myself unable to post much, due to working an insane number of hours, which also means little time for wearing heels.

I can tell you that all of the new, higher heels I've bought recently feel very awkward after just a few weeks of not being able to wear them a lot. I still feel very comfortable in shoes with a rise of 4 inches or less, but my newer shoes, which are steeper than that, well, I'll have to start over again with them when I get time. Two steps forward and three steps back.

I attended a 4th of July picnic (American Independence Day) this evening. The host was one of my union brothers, an electrician who is not working with me currently, and whom I haven't really seen in a number of years. I decided to wear skinny jeans with a men's polo shirt and my Söfft Belicia sandals with a 3 3/4 inch thicker heel. Maybe some would call it a block heel. Very little platform on these shoes. It's basically like really thick padding.

This was a blue collar, working class party, so I was a little nervous about how I would be received. My host, whom I had roomed with when we were on the road several years ago, asked immediately about my shoes, and I replied in a joking manner. It was ok after that. My host's wife mentioned that she has a pair of sandals almost exactly like the ones I was wearing. She kind of fished around in her questioning to see if I were a cross dresser, but I told her that what she saw there was pretty much as far as it went, except that the heels I'd chosen were pretty low for me. She looked at my wife and said, "Those are low? Is that right?" My wife nodded and said, "Yaaa, that's right." Nothing more was said for the remainder of the evening, except for a little girl about 8 years old came up to me and told me that she liked my shoes.

Speaking of being pretty low, I'm glad that I did not choose higher or thinner heels to wear, because I wound up playing baseball. Luckily, the ground was hard enough to where it didn't slow me down too much. However, I'm considering the purchase of a pair of low-ish wedges just for an occasion like this. I already own 2 pairs of wedges, but they are pretty high and platform-y and really girly and not all that stable on uneven ground and. . . well, I just didn't want to wear them.

Here are a couple of pictures, one of the shoes, and the other of me playing catcher.

Hi Preston, wow, you're not messing around about this heel thing! Those are some pretty ambitious shoes! I guess my question is, what type of image do you wish to project? I'm not one to criticize another person's style too much, but to me, these look like enormous bricks strapped to the model's admittedly rather attractive feet.

I am only vaguely aware of your situation, but perhaps it would be wise to go with something slightly less radical. Also, maybe you're a natural, but it's taken me three years and literally hundreds of miles and hours of wearing lower heels to be able to function normally in heels that high. Will you be able to walk in them? If so, I tip my hat to you.

As far as expanding your collection, I say go for it, if you've got the discretionary income, which you seem to have. You might do a search for Sbicca shoes on Amazon. They have some nice wedges which are not that expensive, if you find a model that is not current. Plus, they are real leather (or textile in some cases), they're durable, and they're made in the USA. They're very comfortable, also. In any case, good luck to you in your search.

I have had the same experience, but in my case, I think my feet have actually gotten smaller in some way, though probably not shorter.

One of the things that was pretty cool about being married to my ex-wife was that we could share shoes. Ok, actually it wasn't that cool because it was basically one way sharing--she would never allow me to wear her heels, but on the other hand, she got me wearing clogs, having spent some time in Sweden, so clogs were ok with her. Later, after we got divorced, this led to mid-heeled clogs, and later unquestionably feminine high-heeled clogs, and then to where I am today. So I guess I can sort of thank her for something--having biggish feet!

ANYWAY, back on point, I always thought I was a 9 1/2, just like my ex-wife. So that's what I bought at first. 9 1/2 worked for a while, but there was always something a little bit funny about them. They were perfect in the toes, but almost always loose around the heel. I figured I just had narrow heels, and could never wear a slip-on shoe, such as a pump. Even with those heel gripper things, I could not make it work. So I tried size 9 instead.

The first pair of size 9 I bought were a kind of loafer style pump, with enormous heels, and only slightly less enormous platforms. I could barely squeeze into them, and no matter what I tried, I could not make them stretch out enough to be at all comfortable. So, I went back to 9 1/2, but only bought lace-up Oxford styles or boots to solve my heel slippage problem.

As an aside, I am only talking about full coverage shoes or boots. Sandal fitment is a whole different ball of wax!

So I went on somewhat unhappily with 9 1/2, until one day I found some very plain, cap toe oxfords on eBay, which is exactly what I had been looking for to wear with my men's suits (I was not a full-time public heeler at the time). These oxfords had 4 1/4 inch stiletto heels with no platform. I always wanted to see if I could be comfortable wearing stilettos. These shoes were so plain looking and conservative other than the heels, I just had to have them! Size 40. Perfect! Except for one thing--they were Aldos. I did not know at the time that older Aldos run quite small. I could barely cram my foot into my new (to me) shoes. And once I did get them on, oh, they were SO high! Significantly steeper than anything I had worn before. I could walk about half a mile in them, maybe, before I needed to rest. I was afraid that I had made a mistake buying them, but they didn't actually hurt my feet, as in give me blisters or squashed toes or anything. They were just a bitch to get on and off. Especially on. So I didn't give up on them, I just kept wearing them occasionally in the house, very occasionally venturing outside to practice late at night. Eventually, it was easier to get them on, and eventually they passed my 2 mile walking test. After that, I wore them to church, and they are a staple shoe for me. I will be sad when they eventually become unrepairable.

The point of this whole very much longer than I intended story is that after I mastered the Aldos, that's when I started realizing I am size 9, not 9 1/2. I mean, taking into account variations in sizing. Of course, I don't wear a 9 in everything. But, my feet are in fact smaller than I thought. I proved this when I was looking at a pair of Tahari oxfords in patent leather (to wear with my orchestra performing tuxedo). Am I size 9 now or not? I was feeding my ex-wife's cats while she was out of town for a week on business (we still get along just fine when we don't have to live with each other), and I spied a brand new pair of shoes in the shoe cabinet near the front door when I came in. Hmmmm, what has she bought? Ahhhhhh, some Tahari pumps. Size 9 1/2. Help me out here, K, I need to see if I'm a 9 now. Suuuure, Melrose! No problem! Try these on to see if they fit! With a somewhat guilty conscience, I did try them on and walked a few steps. Yep, just a little bit too big. Thank you K, you've been a big help. I promise I'll never do this again without telling you first. Which means I'll never do it again. I won my Tahari patent leather oxfords on EBay, and size 9 fit perfectly.

Size 9 is now reasonably reliable for me in shoes. So how did I go from a size 9 1/2 to a 9? It seems impossible that my foot has actually gotten smaller. I have a theory. I think it's my toes that have gotten more flexible. I think I've always been size 9, but when I got into the higher/steeper heels, my toes weren't flexible enough to accommodate the bend in the shoes, so I thought I needed a bigger size. Now they are. I also can now wear slip-on type shoes without walking out of them. Plus, I'm much happier being a size 9, because everything you ever wanted comes in size 9. Not so much true with 9 1/2.

It seems that indeed some shoes weren't made for walking. I have several pairs of shoes which have not held up very well under the rigors of actual walking, and none of them are terribly cheap shoes. All of them are shoes which most people (ok, most women) would not consider walking 3 or 4 blocks in, much less miles. I guess the manufacturers never figured anyone could actually wear them like normal shoes.

They appear to have survived. I took a couple mile walk in them last night, and they're fine. If they stretched out at all, it wasn't very much.

It's not nearly as exciting as I have made it sound, though I haven't told any lies or exaggerated anything.

A couple of years ago, I teceived a telephone call from a friend who works in the P.R. department of our local college. He said he had a freshman student in his office from Hanoi, Vietnam, and he thought she was feeling rather homesick. He knows that my wife is also from Hanoi, and thought that perhaps we might consider inviting her over to our house. We did so, and although she doesn't come around too much during the school year, it has come to pass that she has been hanging around here a lot lately, now that all her friends have gone home for the summer. We also take her out to eat or do other activities quite often. She's cuter than a baby bunny.

She seems to accept my heel wearing without question, which I find extraordinary. She's evidently never even mentioned anything to my wife, because if she had done so, I'd have heard about it, believe me (Rolls eyes).

Now for the bad news. When we first met her, she almost always wore heels, like a great number of young Vietnamese girls do. Now that she's been in the U.S. a couple of years, she does not. I was teasing her the other day--"How DARE you show up to my house wearing Crocs!" She took it in good humor.

Even in Crocs, she's a wonderful young lady. Serious, very intelligent, and with a sense of humor that transcends cultural differences. Besides, how can you not like a really cute girl who sounds ever-so-slightly like Cookie Monster when she speaks?

 

in the photo above: does my foot look too big for the size 10?

 

I've looked at the photo on my phone, and also on the computer, and I can't really tell whether they look too small or not. If you're two sizes too small, they might be kind of borderline.

Mlroseplant,

Wet leather should dry fine if you let it dry naturally and don't expose it to heat. After all, it probably got wet many times when it was still on the animal! Your sandals should be okay. They look like the Sofft sandals you inspired me to get. Are they?

Steve

Yes, Steve, those *are* the Söfft Belicias I've had for a couple of years that you took an immediate liking to. I've had them sitting on the floor for a few days with a wad of paper towels loosely stuffed into them, in an attempt to preserve the shape.

My fear was that they would stretch out too much while they were wet, as I had to walk more than a mile home after I was caught in the downpour. I watched as my toes got closer and closer to sticking over the edge of the sandals. It has definitely loosened them up some, but not too much, I think. I have yet to test them out in the real world. Appearance-wise, it didn't hurt them too much. What it *did* do is leech/grind a ton of black shoe polish into my feet, which took several days to come all the way out.

I'll report again once I have walked a mile or two in them.

Me too, SF. Carry on!

I get a lọt more attention in skinny jeans than I do in boot cut jeans. In spite of this, I prefer the skinny jeans because I only wear mules/slides during the summer, and it's so much easier not having to deal with my pant legs getting caught up in my shoes. It's also a lot easier to deal with the attention when you've got a wife, a kid, and a really hot female college student in tow. Long story.....

Geez Miroseplant, did it wash off your pedicure too? Kidding, but the visual was funny!

No offense taken, but yeah, I don't do nail polish. Actually, I prefer bare nails on both women and men. I had just given myself a much-needed pedicure. I have to do it myself these days, ever since my gal Bình decided to go back to being a tailor instead of a nail tech. It's a long story...

I got caught in a heavy rainstorm more than a mile away from home. I did have an umbrella with me, but I still got soaked from the knees down, and had to walk through some rivulets several inches deep. These sandals have been my trusty friends for nearly 100 miles. I hope they are OK when they dry out.

Very nice heels, but too high for me to wear.

Yesterday, my grand-daughter attempted to wear a pair of similar looking heels, with her red gown. to her, "Senior Prom". At the last minute she decided to wear a pair of silver flats. I said to her a very smart move, considering all the dancing and partying, going on at one's Senior Prom. She did wear the "Killer Heels" to the hotel, but changed into her flats, to party. She said she had a great time.

Oh yes, to be a teenager again!

Oddly enough, this is the current subject of my new thread in "For the Guys." You aren't going to wear those heels to prom or any other lengthy event successfully without a great deal of practice and training.

On a different subject, you must remember high school much more fondly than I do, Bluejay. Haha.

My first random thought: I have read many an article which recommends that if you must wear high heels, you shouldn't wear them every day, and you should severely limit your time in them, wearing them only on special occasions, as if heel wearing were a bad habit that must be kept under control. I couldn't disagree more.

The problem with this advice is that if one only wears heels occasionally, one will never become any good at walking in them. I compare it to ballet dancing or playing music. If you don't practice often (which means every day at a professional level), you will lose skill level rapidly. I experience this every year when I travel to Vietnam for three weeks to visit my wife's family, and I am not allowed to wear high heels (and rightfully so--I don't think I would enjoy myself in that environment as a man in heels anyway--they are not yet ready for it).

Although I have only three years experience wearing heels on a regular basis, when I come back from my visit, I always feel a bit awkward in heels for a couple of weeks until I get back in practice. Let's face it--wearing high heels is an athletic skill which must be practiced often if one is to exhibit any grace and style and endurance.

I would be mortified if I ruined an outing because I chose to wear 5 inch heels, and then had to limit the group's activities because I couldn't hack the walking. You don't get to that level by limiting your time in heels, as many suggest.

Hello all, I have been considering starting a "jaunts" type thread for some time, but I don't really "do" jaunts. In other words, I don't ever dress up for the sole purpose of going out dressed up. I just simply go about my everyday life wearing heels and usually close-fitting women's jeans. So, in light of that, I thought I would start a thread which will feature probably rather random thoughts about high heels and perhaps other traditionally women's fashion that I might like to incorporate into my wardrobe.

I have decided to start this thread with an introduction, or re-introduction, rather than jumping right in with thoughts and insights into the world of a male who likes to wear high heels.

My name is not actually Melrose Plant, that is a work nickname which has fallen into disuse over the years. However, it persists on the Internet, as I prefer it to my current work nickname, Squirrel. I am married and I have two sons, aged 6 and 16. The boys are fine with my choice of footwear, even the teenager. My wife tolerates it, but I am sure she wouldn't mind a bit if I decided one day to throw all my heels away. That ain't gonna happen.

As I said, I plan to share random thoughts about wearing high heels and perhaps other traditionally women's clothing from time to time, and I hope it becomes an interesting thread. I welcome all comments and opinions.

I went to a housewarming party this evening. The new (to them) house was occupied by long time friends of mine. They are a Croatian/Vietnamese couple with two young children.

As usual, my Vietnamese wife and I were overdressed for the occasion. My wife wore a dress and mid-heeled mules, and I wore a button-down casual shirt, boot-cut, close-fitting casual tan pants, and thong sandals with 4 1/4 inch stiletto heels. Everyone else was dressed much more casually than we were, save a couple of Vietnamese women, who were wearing skirts.

There were three languages spoken at this party, and tonight I was attuned to the Vietnamese conversation. I could not understand the full conversation, but I could hear they were talking about my shoes with my wife. I answered, in English, "What? It has taken you this long to notice my shoes?" My wife hugged me and gave me a quick peck on the lips, and after that, people seemed to take me at face value. One Vietnamese man even asked advice about an electrical problem he was having at work (I'm an electrician by trade). We exchanged phone numbers, and I told him I would come by and look at the problem next week.

Overall, a comfortable situation, and my wife didn't even seem embarrassed. Not a big deal, but I thought I would share.

Yes, that is the usually understood meaning nowadays in the UK, although the term is not often used, except perhaps by older women for whom it was the normal name for a pair of casual trousers when they were young. At one time it was used by both sexes to describe casual trousers, usually fairly loose-fitting (hence 'slack'), although of course trousers were not 'acceptable' everyday wear for women until WW2. In the UK, we find the term 'pants' (meaning trousers) amusing and somewhat embarrassing, as pants to us are briefs or knickers worn by either sex as underwear. Two nations divided by a common language ...

I find this difference in terminology fascinating as a native English speaker, but it makes me wonder how I should teach my several Vietnamese students. On the one hand, I would feel strange as an American using the word "trousers" to describe the ubiquitous garment. On the other hand, I would hate for them to be a source of amusement because of the understood UK meaning of "pants" being underwear. Who knew that a high heel website would be such an educational experience in linguistics?

Slacks. Now there's a word I haven't heard in a while. In fact, I haven't heard that word used since elementary school, which would be the 1970s for me. I was curious, so I did a Google search. A bit of explanation may be required for our friends outside the U.S.

"Slacks" refers to a dressy bifurcated garment which covers the body from the waist to the ankles, but which is not part of a "suit," which has a matching jacket. We usually use the word "pants" in the U.S. or "trousers" in the U.K. I don't know about Canada or Oz. I have never heard anybody refer to leather pants as "slacks" until now. I guess that means you're one-of-a-kind, TBG!

Perhaps this is a little off the subject, but I am curious. Do you do all five nails, or do you leave out the little finger? And how long do you have your nails from the free edge for most effective playing?

I keep the natural nails on my right hand at about 3 mm long, except for the little finger, which I don't use for picking. Of course I keep the nails on my left hand very short for fretting. It is not easy to preserve my nails, as I work construction. It is somewhat easier nowadays, as they have come out with dexterity gloves that you can actually do about 95% of the things you need to do while wearing them. Many construction job sites require that you wear gloves 100% of the time, in order to reduce hand injuries. I think it works. My hands look much better than they did 10 years ago.

As I recently posted, I've been publicly heeling for three years. Up to now, with a few exceptions, I have worn boot cut women's jeans with my heels. It seemed that whenever I wore skinnies or shorts, I got way more attention than I wanted, some of it quite negative.

However, lately I have taken to wearing skinny jeans tucked inside my Dr. Marten wedge boots with 3 1/2 inch heels to mow the lawn (both my own and customers'). I even wore this getup to help a friend move house yesterday. So far, no negative reaction. Come to think of it, no reaction at all from anyone. What do you guys (and possibly gals) think?

Yes, Histiletto, I would agree with your advice 100%. We really want to make it look easy, like any athlete strives for. I also have the 2 mile rule with almost all my shoes. I have mentioned this many times before, but I will say it again for the benefit of newcomers and aspiring public heelers. If I can't walk 2 miles (3.2 km) in a pair of heels in reasonable comfort, I get rid of them. This doesn't always happen immediately. I always give a pair of shoes I really like many fair chances to pass the test, but some shoes are just not meant for my feet, and I won't suffer for the sake of fashion. I will practice, I will train, but I refuse to feel miserable in a pair of shoes, because what's the point?

Another thing to think about--standing is often more difficult than walking. I have memories of proudly wearing a brand new pair of wicked 5" boots to the mall, then barely being able to make it back to the car because I had to wait in line for almost an hour at the mobile phone store (it was the Christmas holiday season). Wow, that tested my ability to cope with pain. Again, today, it is no problem. It's just a matter of practice and training.

A final thought tonight, on this third anniversary for me: I have a 21 year old niece in Vietnam who likes to wear heels. She is one of only three people in Vietnam who know about my choice of footwear. She seems to believe that men don't have the ability to walk in heels, and she said the shoes she likes to wear would absolutely kill me. Maybe it's true, but I'm fairly confident that I would walk all over her in a distance heeling contest. Brothers, help me prove her wrong!

This week marks three years that I've been doing the public heeling thing. It seems kind of anti-climactic now, but I guess I'd better mark it for the sake of others who may need that extra little encouragement to begin wearing heels in public.

Three years ago, I put on the shoes pictured below, which were my first pair of "real" heels that I had bought to wear outside the house, and pushed my then three-year-old son in his stroller down to Bike Night, a monthly motorcycle rally held in our town. I wore the shoes under very long pants, and I was surprised at the time that I got no attention whatsoever from anyone. I wore these shoes out quite a few times (but not all the time like I do now), until I got some even higher heeled clogs, which then became the new standard some six months later. I still wear these shoes occasionally, and I will probably keep them forever for sentimental reasons, even when they are no longer fit to wear.

One thing I remember about my first time out, besides the lack of attention, was that the half mile walk to the town square, and the half mile walk back home seemed like it lasted FOREVER. I don't remember it being truly painful, but I was not prepared for that particular athletic challenge at the time. Today, with many miles of experience and practice under my belt, walking a mile in what are effectively 3 inch heels would be nothing to think of at all. Three years ago, having never been out in the real world wearing heels before, it was very difficult. I'm sure I didn't look too pretty. That would be the one bit of advice I'd like to give to new public heelers: Try to figure out some way to practice walking out in the real world before you do it in front of people. I don't care how many hours you've worn heels around the house, how many floors you've vacuumed or swept in heels, how many loads of laundry you've done in heels, once you are faced with a distance to walk outside in a continuous manner, and on ground that is not perfectly smooth and level, you will realize that you are not really prepared for what awaits you.

I was lucky that my town is small and quiet enough so that I was able to practice walking in heels late in the evenings, under cover of darkness, without worrying about my safety. I have walked hundreds of miles through my neighborhood over the last three years. Even so, to this day, I feel like I need more practice. Or maybe that's just me, wanting to find an excuse to go out in heels.

This happens to me all the time. My work absolutely dictates whats shoes I wear (and even then I still have the highest heels on the jobsite--always), so I try to walk in heels every evening when it's not pouring down rain. However, my work schedule has been so grueling as of late that an extra 10 minutes of deciding which shoes to wear often results in me not going out for a walk at all. Not good. I should just throw on any pair and go. It's really my only exercise these days, and I'm slowly but surely getting fatter.