i told my mom!

[polishuser2002]

Hi Terayon, Wow that really is some boot. It must be at least 5 inches high. I approve of them and am rather envious. The weather has probably got too warm for those boots in London now. Did your mother buy them for you? If not, then has she seen them and does she approve of them?

[Highluc]

Hi Tera, I'm glad you like them and for starters they look ok but they are not my style. The lift doesn't look sufficient for me and the heel has no shape. They must be easy to walk on with the pronounced upslope on the front of the sole and under long flared pants the heels can be hidden pretty well showing only a standard masculine type block heel. I would categorize this boot as an ideal shoe to build up confidence, proficiency and acceptance from your environment. Knee highs are also providing nice awareness and warmth for the wearer.

I wish you much pleasure wearing them.

_________________

Be youself, enjoy any footwear you like and don't care about what others think about it, it's your life, not theirs. Greetings from Highluc on http://walk.to/highluc

<font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: Highluc on 2002-04-11 01:29 ]</font>

[terayon]

thanks a lot highluc! btw, the heel is 4.5inches with a 1.5inch platform...i bought them myself, my mom has seen me in them and is ok with it

[Firefox]

Not bad T. I don't think you'll have any trouble wearing those anywhere. Excellent unisex style boot. Top effort. Edit: The heel looks about the right size to fit neatly in your sister's mouth should she prove it is getting too big _________________ Believe in your right to wear what you want <font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: Firefox on 2002-04-11 02:22 ]</font>

[Laurieheels]

You know, I have seen many boys and girls, teenagers if you will, wearing such baggy and long, flared out pants, that the hem drags on the ground. Only the tip of the toe peeks out. So if this is a fashion trend, then I think our good friend Terayon can use such pants from time to time to hide the heels and still wear them. I mean these pants cover everything!

[Beeblebrox]

Terayon, its really nice pair of boots you have, a style that I like. I recently bought a similar boot, just waitng for them to arrive. With long pants they are an good option for public wearing if you dont want to show the heel.

[Firefox]

You know what guys? I'm not convinced about this whole long pant thing. OK, if you are going for a quick trot round the malls at dusk and you really can't bear the thought of people seeing you in cool foowear then pants may have their uses. However, if you are going to wear them in bars, social, school, work etc, then your mates are going to notice sooner or later, when you sit down or whan walking, stairs, and the like. You're not going to be able to live a lie, so why pretend, or try and hide them when you can't. Just come clean and wear them with whatever pants you normally wear, or maybe slightly longer if you are trying to get the best look with that height of heel/platorm.

[Beeblebrox]

I am not yet fully free in mind to wear exactly what kind of heel I like at the moment. In London it was good because it was a town which there was minimal risk of meeting someone I know. Still did I use long pants for "hiding" my 5" heels, it is for two reason. First it gives me comfort of not viewing all of the heel and second, I really like the look of pant hiding the heel, well not completely, but just showing an inch or so of the heel. I cant help it, I like and prefer it, but I like the full visible heel too. However, I dont hide heels up to 3" at all, so perhaps I change that in the future. I did som thing who is an approvement for me. I have been walking in superstores, in a public park, in the city, at gasstaions with my recoulored Sascha cowboy boots with 4 1/4" heels, fully covered by pants. It gave me the comfort to do it. I have not told my friende here about my heel wearing and I did this "training" in my city where I could meet someone I know. I have come to the point where it doesnt matter if I'm discovered anymore, but I'll take the consequensens when it comes. I have been meeting folk while walking with them and talked to some of them. All the time trying to find out if they notice or dont, if there is doubletakes and so on. Whith these boots heels fully covered with my pants I had no problem what so ever. It might be a little step for most of you here, but it is a little bigger step for me and perhaps others too. I think we should be respected in the way we feel of wearing heels, we are individuals after all and we dont think and act and do, and feel the exact things. Some of us, like me, and perhaps someone else here like to take things in small steps and we might not have the same goal of how we wear our heels. If we will fight for equality between genders we first have to accept each other for whom we are and how we dress. So Firefox, I'm gratefull for all your advices and your good points and I still looking forward to read and hear them in the future. But we might have different likeings of how the heel should be visible or not. I agree with you if it ever will be totally acceptable for a male wearing heels its a good point to wear the heel visible together with a good sence of dressing which is different for most of us. Then perhaps the the acceptance will come after a while. If I understand it right, there is today a openmindness of men wearing heels, not 100%, but hopefully in the futere higher than today. Ohhh, that was a long one, it might be errors in language. Have patience with me, it seems like I need some work until my mind is completely free. In worst case a lifetimes work.

[Jeff]

Well put Beeblebrox, I know exactly what you mean. For me it's also a slow process. (I'm the kind of guy who doesn't like to be the center of attention and wearing heels doesn't help that at all..) There are still situations where I feel less comfortable in heels, but slowly this get's better. As for work, still only 2" masculine looking shoes till now..

[Firefox]

Sorry Beeblebrox, I think you misinterpreted my point there. I'm quite open minded about what people wear (obviously _________________ Believe in your right to wear what you want (edit: spelling) <font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: Firefox on 2002-04-12 02:55 ]</font>

[Beeblebrox]

I'm sorry if I got you wrong and apologize for that.

[Highluc]

I think some are still confused about the "longer flared pants". Some immediately think about those ground dragging ultra wide models while others mean pants that glide over the instep and remain about 2-inches from the ground at rest. It's not just a question of hiding the heel but the latter model coordinates well with any heels and other clothing, and is very often seen on classy business dressing during fashion shows and on the streets (worn by girls and ladies). A lot of the guys on this board (Breeblebox, Jeff, Lion and myself) aparently opted for this style and during our gatherings I think it looked very smart. None of us were exhibitionist (I don't say others are) but some combine the smart look of such pants with the advantage of hiding the true magnitude of our heels and offering a svelte look because of the apparent longer legs. Our feminine counterparts often came to the same conclusion because we see numerous reports of heeled sightings unable to describe the exact heels or shoestyle because part of it was hidden by the pants. Some of us wear them to conceal, others because they like the style. After wearing heels since 3 decades I don't give a damn about what others might see or think but still prefer some longer flared models, maybe a reminder of my youth during the magical hippie times.

[Jeff]

Actualy, I don't wear flared leg pants. Most of my jeans are the straight model. I mostly wear a longer pair (36" length) with my heels, but sometimes also 34". Basically because I like the look of it (36" leaves about 1,5-2" of the heel visible). Hiding really doesn't work this way, since while walking the entire heel shows.

[terayon]

i normally wear pants with a size 36-38 leg...i like my pants to be long and baggy anyway, even for my normal shoes...so they do cover heels pretty well too

[JeffB]

This is just me, mind you, but i wear regular length pants with my shoes, including my pumps. After all, what's the sense in wearing heels if you don't show 'em off?

[Yamyam]

Well, I think wearing slightly longer trousers (pants are those things you wear under your trousers, like boxer shorts, imho) is a confidence thing for me. Dizzyblonde and I found some wide-legged longer jeans for me in Next to Nothing, Birmingham. I plan to wear them next time I get the chance, just to build up confidence. But those who've said 'Don't hide!' have a point - just more confidence than some others, like me

[Calv]

On 2002-04-11 22:40, Beeblebrox wrote:

I am not yet fully free in mind to wear exactly what kind of heel I like at the moment. In London it was good because it was a town which there was minimal risk of meeting someone I know.

Beeblebrox raised an interesting point in his post regarding the possibility of meeting somebody we know, whilst wearing heels.

Does this bother anybody else? I know the thought is always in my mind. Are we scared of somebody we know making a comment?

I have worn 3" heeled boots to the office and received comments from my co-workers like "he's got his high heels on again" and "look at those wussy (sissy) shoes" and the feeling in the back of mind is that if I wear the heels I will receive more comments like this. Mind you if I wear the wedge heels I have nobody notices (or at least I get no comments)

[Arctic]

On 2002-04-14 22:48, Calv wrote:

Beeblebrox raised an interesting point in his post regarding the possibility of meeting somebody we know, whilst wearing heels.

Does this bother anybody else? I know the thought is always in my mind. Are we scared of somebody we know making a comment?

Yep, same here. I don't know why actally because I don't care what people think, and still....

Bert

[Arctic]

On 2002-04-11 22:40, Beeblebrox wrote:

I am not yet fully free in mind to wear exactly what kind of heel I like at the moment.

Same for me. I have a hard time wearing stilettos and blade heels over 10 cm in public. Really funny.

In London it was good because it was a town which there was minimal risk of meeting someone I know. Still did I use long pants for "hiding" my 5" heels, it is for two reason. First it gives me comfort of not viewing all of the heel and second, I really like the look of pant hiding the heel, well not completely, but just showing an inch or so of the heel. I cant help it, I like and prefer it, but I like the full visible heel too. However, I dont hide heels up to 3" at all, so perhaps I change that in the future.

For me it's the height vs. thickness proportion that makes the difference. I feel ok wearing 4" blocks unhidden, but 3" blades are hard....

I did som thing who is an approvement for me. I have been walking in superstores, in a public park, in the city, at gasstaions with my recoulored Sascha cowboy boots with 4 1/4" heels, fully covered by pants. It gave me the comfort to do it. I have not told my friende here about my heel wearing and I did this "training" in my city where I could meet someone I know. I have come to the point where it doesnt matter if I'm discovered anymore, but I'll take the consequensens when it comes. I have been meeting folk while walking with them and talked to some of them. All the time trying to find out if they notice or dont, if there is doubletakes and so on. Whith these boots heels fully covered with my pants I had no problem what so ever.

It might be a little step for most of you here, but it is a little bigger step for me and perhaps others too.

Also for me there is a glass ceiling at some point, but I'm ok wearing those that are below that anywhere.

I think we should be respected in the way we feel of wearing heels, we are individuals after all and we dont think and act and do, and feel the exact things. Some of us, like me, and perhaps someone else here like to take things in small steps and we might not have the same goal of how we wear our heels.

If we will fight for equality between genders we first have to accept each other for whom we are and how we dress.

Amen! That was well said.

Bert

[Jeff]

On 2002-04-14 22:48, Calv wrote:

Does this bother anybody else? I know the thought is always in my mind. Are we scared of somebody we know making a comment?

Actualy, I'm bothered more if people I know that see me in heels for the first time don't make a comment about it. Cause it's almost for sure that it's going to be subject of conversation as soon as you turn your back. (Not that it won't happen if they do comment on it first, though..)

I like it best when they ask me something about it so I get a chance to tell that there's really nothing about it and I'm still the same me. That way I can stop thinking about what they might think and they can stop wondering whether I'm gay or tv or something.

[Firefox]

Since all my friends and family know I wear heels, I've got nothing to hide, so I wear whatever shoes whenever I feel like it. That's the best way to be, if you can manage it, but I appreciate there may be other considerations for some. Like Jeff, I sometimes get a little disappointed if someone doesn't make a comment. I think it's been said before, but even when a girl wears high shoes or a revealing dress for the first time, she's apprehensive of how that will be accepted. Once you cross that first hurdle, it's downhill all the way from there.

[terayon]

thats exactly the same problem with me...im not afraid to confront people face to face, but its the nasty rumours spreading that really pisses me off =

[terayon]

On 2002-03-16 05:42, Nata wrote:

I didn't save up money to buy any heels before because of fear of freaking my folks out. But when my dad asked me if I liked the shoe on the display window one fine day, I gladly took this opportunity to tell him yes.. My mum did not say a thing and I knew that as long as my dad gave the go-ahead, mum will not object to it. Dad even paid for all of my subsequent purchases.

are you a girl or a guy?

no offense, but ur name sounds like a girl, and if so...why would ypou be nervous to buy heels? girls are supposed to wear high heels...not like 4-5inch, but almost every girl i know owns at LEAST one pair of 3+ inch boots/shoes

[Firefox]

Nata is a girl from Singapore where the culture can be a little hard at times on those who want to express themselves, or so I've been told. That goes for men or women. I think you'd be suprised how many girls have deliberated if they could wear the shoes or fashions they desired in certain company. Don't forget you're afraid of some cruel comments, and girls can face the same thing; tarts, bitches, and worse so I don't think it is always totally easy for girls to be expressive, although I agree it is easier than for guys.

[Arctic]

On 2002-04-15 01:36, Firefox wrote:

Since all my friends and family know I wear heels, I've got nothing to hide, so I wear whatever shoes whenever I feel like it. That's the best way to be, if you can manage it, but I appreciate there may be other considerations for some. Like Jeff, I sometimes get a little disappointed if someone doesn't make a comment.

Once you cross that first hurdle, it's downhill all the way from there.

Not always. I've mentioned it already dozens of times, but my hurdle is my wife. I came clear with myself in a few months, and I'm sure that I would wear them 7/7 now if my wife wouldn't oppose. So first I got a very liberated feeling, which is now quite a frustration due to my other half.

And what can you do about it? I can't just slam it in her face and sacrifice my marriage - heels are very important to me but not THAT important.

So, I know that after THIS last hurdle it will be downhill at 9.81 m/s^2 but it's not a self-inclined one.

There is also a problem growing by participating in these forums regularly. I'm starting to get serious difficulties understanding what is the problem with wearing heels. We have convinced eachother on the forum that it really is no big deal to do what we like most, and I find it harder and harder each day to remember why people sometimes look at us as weirdos.

Bert

[Firefox]

There's always going to be a few people who are intolerant about it. Sorry about your wife. You've mentioned her before, and she acts in an illogical fashion. When someone is illogical I tend to feel pitty for them/ Oh well, they don't have sufficent intelligence or presence of mind to overcome a mental block. That's life sometimes and one has to accept it for better or for worse. As far as the general public is concerned, then what is a weirdo? One of the 5% of people who doesn't follow the line forced down his throat by constant media pressure? Someone who is clever or brave enough to make their own style? In that case I'm glad to be a weirdo. The rest of the f****g clones are welcome to their mundane existence. Anyway, back on topic, what is Mum saying now T, or has she just accepted it without further worry?

[terayon]

sort of, yesterday i went shopping for a new pair of sandals..i even tried on a pair of steve madden ones in the store, but despite the fact that I was going to pay for them, she didnt want me to buy them since i wouldnt wear them outside with shorts in the summer...said i shouldnt waste my money unless i was gunna use what im buying..i dunno...i may go back and buy them..they are really nice

[Yamyam]

Most of the people who know me don't know yet... Most of my friends, and certainly most of the more open-minded ones are down south. I plan to get down there as soon as I can, and go for it in some heels, and see what happens! I don't think there'll be a problem, but at some point you have to go for it, just to feel free. I was there for New Year, but chickened out . I missed the weekend just gone, but I'm working on a party in June.

[Highluc]

Hi Terayon, do I read you actually went shoe shopping with your mom and you tried Steve Madden sandals in a store with her at your side? Quite some rapid progress there. Which model name were those sandals so we can look it up on the Steve Madden website? As for the wearing aspect, I make good use of most of my shoes, including sandals. Some "unacceptable" styles I only wear home but others (mostly high wedges) I wear under flared jeans or slacks in public when the weather is hot. I rarely wear shorts anymore. Wearing sandals in the confinements of your home is very beneficial for the health of your feet allowing plenty of fresh air around them, besides the huge benefit of the fun wearing more adventurous styles. It's cheap of your mom to comment you shouldn't invest in shoes you can't make good use of, while she has a hundred pair to choose from.

[Francis]

ah, this comes back to the 'one rule for us and another for them' problem. unfortunately, this problem will not disappear overnight, so the best course of action is to buy them anyway and prove that the rules that apply to them may not apply to you, but why should you follow those rules! you are already making your own rules with your fashion choice! No turning back now!