Bumping Into Someone You Know: Is It Like You Expected?

[SleekHeels]

Well it had to happen some time. I mostly wear my heels at fairly busy public places usually among strangers, this time at a cafe, and I bumped into someone I knew from work from a few years ago. I was wearing my black suedette strappy peeptoes (with black opaque tights, a red bodycon miniskirt and black turtleneck top). I'd always imagined that if I bumped into someone it would be a major panic, but it was a totaly calm situation. We bought coffees and sat down and chatted for a while, completely naturally without any reference to how I was dressed, no suppressed giggles or strange glances. It's not like we avoided bringing up the topic (of course we were both aware of it), it was just a non-issue and we had other things to chat about.

Sorry if you guys wanted some adrenaline-filled rollercoaster ride of a story, I guess it doesn't always happen that way.

 

So, when you've worn your heels and bump into someone you know (who doesn't know about your heeling), was the experience like you expected it to be?

[Histiletto]

The reaction that I get to most of my encounters has been take I stride. Sure they notice I'm wearing high heels, but the conversation or actions almost never acknowledges my footwear. Isn't this the way it should happen? You walk in and go about your business, what ever it is and then walk out. You may be wanting to have the discussion about your heels, but it really doesn't matter to others, at least enough to offer any kind of comment. So enjoy your public outings and wear the high heels you like. If by chance you are given the opportunity to talk about your choice of footwear, you can straight away discuss them as the conversation goes.   

[Steve63130]

I'm out and about in the community all the time, I always see people I know and to whom I say hello and chat, and I'm STILL waiting for somebody to ask about my heels. If they notice, they don't care.

 

Steve

[Shafted]

I see people I know all the time while wearing heels. Iv'e even bumped into relatives while wearing heels.

 

It always seems to be a non-issue.

[Dr. Shoe]

This is because it really is a non-issue for anyone else other than the wearer.

[SleekHeels]

For a while now it's always been a non-issue for me with strangers, but this was the first time I bumped into someone I knew and it really surprised me (pleasantly) how much of a non-issue it was. Thanks for the responses, I'm glad that this seems to be unanimous, as one of the top concerns for reluctant newbies is "what if I bump into someone I know?".

[Steve63130]

Unless that "someone I know" is a high heel addict like we are, they won't know or care. We think, because we have this high heel passion, that everyone else does, too, and is always looking at other people's feet. In truth, those who don't have that passion couldn't care less and aren't the least bit observant. It's all in our heads.

 

Steve

[softmover]

Hi all,

 

I am wearing high heels on a daily basis since almost 10 years now and can count the number of times being asked about them with my fingers. When in office I really draw more attention when I do NOT wear heels - I think the colleagues expect me to wear them.

The nicest experience recently was in a supermarket though. I wore ankle boots with 8cm block heels and a stranger approached me asking whether these are in fashion again and where I got them because he wanted to check for himself.

 

softmover

[wedgemao]

i have to agree with you guys.

as for myself, when not in biz attire, I am wearing always wedge sneakers (this is my thing now) everywhere...

i would like to share a couple of good experiences:

- once i was putting gas in my car and the guys workign at the station came to check out my shoes and complimented on them and went on asking where i got them...

- another time my personal trainer saw my dunk sper sky hi boots and again complimented for them as he tought they were very cool

[skirtandheel]

Several years ago I bumped into two people from a counterpart organisation whilst checking into a hotel in Bolton. I had on a pencil skirt and heeled knee boots. Chances of meeting anyone I knew were low, so I was not prepared for the encounter. They said nothing about my clothing, just greeted me with a smile and never treated me any differently when we met several more times although on these occasions I was in a regular business suit.

[Guest]

Oh that would really suck.

I only wear heels and they are hidden pretty good so really no problems.

[skirtandheel]

Oh that would really suck.

Wasn't great at the time of the encounter but, looking back, wasn't an issue and I just wish I'd not reacted the way I did.

[AZShoeNut]

Wasn't great at the time of the encounter but, looking back, wasn't an issue and I just wish I'd not reacted the way I did.

How did you react?

[skirtandheel]

At the time I'd just driven 200+ miles/4.5 hours and had a migraine. Out of the usual context, I didn't recognise them at first. So, all in all, I wasn't prepared for any encounter, so I feigned a case of mistaken identity at the time.

I apologised when I next saw them. They made no more issue with the matter. All ok thereafter.

[AZShoeNut]

Oh wow. Yeah, not the best circumstances.

[AZShoeNut]

Howdy,

 

I have always wondered what that would be like.  Haven't had the experience.

 

There are some people that I think could only help improve the experience so I wouldn't mind running into them.  I am pretty sure that one of my previous coworkers would definitely encourage me to rock my heels.

 

Then there are people who I certainly would not like to run into.  I sure as heck do not want to run into any of the machinists where I work when I am out and about.  I am the new guy in the design department and I think that I still have a long way to go until I earn their respect and I don't want anything to possibly cloud that.  You should here them talk crap about people and I don't want to be the focal point.

 

Interestingly, though, considering either take that I have above requires me to be the judgmental/prejudice one.  I think this person is cool so I wouldn't mind running into them but this dude could be a chump so let's do everything I can to avoid them. Reality could be a totally different experience.

 

Best,

Larry

[Steve63130]

Larry,

 

I think it's all about confidence, and you seem to have plenty of that, so if I were you, I wouldn't worry. If you run into people who nod approval or give you compliments, great! But if you run into other types who frown or have negative reactions, as long as you're upbeat, smile, and keep on going, they won't even remember the experience the next day! Live your life for yourself and don't worry what others might think.

 

Steve

[SF]

A few years ago the wife and I were in Reno, NV heading to a comedy show.  As we got to the line, I met a guy that I had worked with, but had not seen in years.  He had his wife with him, who I had never met.  I was wearing a pair of 2 inch wedgie heels, not to conspicuous, but obviously gals shoes.  I also had my toenails painted a very light pink color.  

We spoke, exchange pleasantries, introduced our wives, exchanged emails and otherwise had a nice conversation.  

As the conversation wound down and we were getting ready to get in line, the wife looked down and asked me if I painted my toenails.  I smiled and told her yes, since I wear sandals a lot my feet should look nice.  We all had a laugh and she said something about wising her husband would get a pedicure some day.  My friend didn't say anything but did not seem disturbed by the conversation.  No comment was made about my shoes.  

I have since seen my friend on several occasions and aside from one joking comment about how nice my toes looked, nothing has been mentioned.  

I have had other similar "meetings" with acquaintances that have been no big deal.  I guess it just depends on when, who and where…  Take care…   sf 

[Histiletto]

Since most of my heels are similar to those depicted in my avatar (closed toe stilettos) most of my shirt/top and jeans/pant outfits portray me with a more dressy casual look. One of my bumps happened while I was shopping in a store and a co-worker and his wife came on the scene. We exchanged a few minutes of conversation with an elevated display of clothes between us, which presented a view of my footwear, but my heels didn't become part of the talk. Some time passed and until another co-worker confronted me to asked if I wore high heels. With an affirmative answer of yes, he didn't pursue the matter and we continued our working. As things happen the business folded and we have all moved on to other jobs.

Another bump occurred at the gas station, when a friend of a friend happened to walk out of the door as I was going inside to pay for the gas. We met on the front sidewalk and traded greetings. Then we talked about some activity our mutual friend was involving us. She had an ample view of my heels, but to my surprise and somewhat disappointment, said nothing about my 4" stiletto black patent Mary Janes. I often wonder if she even looked back as we parted to verify my footwear choice, but nothing has ever been said to me on any of our subsequent activities.

From situations like these, it would be fair to surmise that others really don't care and the real trauma or fear about men wearing heels is from our insecurity we have contrived in our heads. This is due to the way we have learned to approach wearing the high heel shoes. Once we, as men, become confident and realize that we are still choosing to wear our type of high heels, what else matters other than to deal with the situations as they arise. When we are being true to ourselves and no longer in the mind-set to deceive others about our natural desire, will the real joy of wearing high heels be for everyone's betterment and greater understanding of the human condition. Furthermore such activities would bring out the failures of society's stereotyping system to separate people by using its man-made list of human behaviors that were assigned to people by their sex organs instead of the personality we chose to develop from the individuals we are.