" The Gossip Circles "

[ilikekicks]

This story is heel-related as it deals with this site in general.

 

This past week saw myself taking the sister-in-law ( whom lives way out west and is visiting us ) shopping and an ' event ' happened.

 

Needless to say, My wife, Sister-in-law and a couple of the other girls in the ' gossip circle ' were all talking about it and what set it all off.

 

My Sister-in-law was unaware that my wife and her friends know of this website. They decided to show her the site and that I'm not the only guy whom roams around wearing ' not so ugly ' footwear.

 

They came across some more of JeffB's pics and they still say he looks ' Hot '. Jeff : If your ever in this neck of the woods, your getting laid!

 

A certain picture came up and had them all saying ' What the fuck?!?!? '. It tweeked them in a way where they just had to ask me about it.

 

Needless to say, I didnt care for the conversation. *I* am *me*. Im not someone else and I dont think, act or present myself as anyone but who and what I am.

 

 

A Thought:

 

As everyone knows, I support people being individuals. YOU are who YOU are. You make your decisions. You are an individual whom has the ability to breathe and gather thoughts by your own means. You have liberties and the freedoms to be whom you wish and people shouldnt frown upon you in any way for being truthful in how you feel. You shouldnt have any problems at all in being whom you are, unquestioned.

 

The problem is when others have to explain something or try to explain a situation because they were asked about it. When you advise them ' Im not there, its not me ' and they respond " You wear heels too! ", it then becomes something I feel inclined to *TRY* and explain. I abysmally failed in my explanation.

 

I was trying to explain to the ' Gossip Circle ' and my sister-in-law that my desires end at footware. Im not into panties, bras, lingerie or wearing fake tits. By all means, I shouldnt even be questioned about anything of the sorts as its not something I partake of. This was my sister-in-laws first viewing of MANY men in heels, not just me in the flesh. She can understand some individuals do things different them others and it makes up unique, but the concept of a BUNCH of men wearing heels fascinated her.

 

The stigmatism I have seen in the past 2 or 3 years was ' Yeah, Hes just some guy whom likes shoes most men wont wear ' is starting to change and change for the worse. I watched some pretty ' open minded ' and accepting women whom are in my life give a VERY SERIOUS thought to *ME* and what I wear.

 

Im sure many of you reading this will believe the problem lies with those women. In actuality, Its partially of my own doing.

 

*I* was the one whom broke the ice for them. I let them know what I do, who I am and what I wear. For being 100% honest with them, they never questioned what I did and even went as far to say that other guys on here were ' hot '. They had no problems at all with guys wearing womens clothing ( for the most part ).

 

When pictures of guys in drag or wearing fake tits come into play where I'm asked about it, it leaves nobody comfortable.

 

Being blunt : I know some of them have heard me and the wife going at it before. They dont question what her and I do. They wouldnt care if I liked men. They wouldnt care if my wife was lapping at another woman. What they do question though is why *I* would visit, partake/indulge in a transexual site.

 

Just my saying such will enflame some, encourage others, and make Shafted and/or Dr. Shoe say ' not this again! '.

 

I know what my course or methods to the madness will be.

 

For starters, I restrained ( due to some pretty vile language ) from adding the specifics of words in which the conversation with myself and the women stated. I'm sleeping down in the studio because of it.

 

Tomorrow will hold a lot of apologizing on my part.

 

The question that some will ask is ' why should you have to apologize for someone else and what they wear '.. No, I need to apologize for the comments I made and some of the questions I threw back at the women in defending what they saw and questioned me about. They were my own words. Thus my own self-incrimination.

 

This has also made me realize that.. How to put this..  ( Im trying to be polite as Ive already shit on quite a few people today.. Its tough to find words sometimes when you really dont want to put others down.. ).

 

I'm a member of this site because I like a certain kind of shoe/boot. I like them on myself and on others. I dont wear them to be flamboyant. I dont wear them to promote a fetish or to be sexy. I dont wear them to ' look like a woman '. I wear them ( in all honesty ) because they actually fit better then mens shoes. I dont wear just ' heels '. My sneakers/trainers are also from the womens section. My riding boots are womens. My Steel-toed work boots are womens. They tend to be more narrow and fit better then anything from the ' normal ' isles designated for ' men ' to shop in.

 

As a member, I can choose to browse or not browse and I've decided to choose to cut back on the participation/browsing here on my part. 

 

*IF* this is to be a Tranny Support Site, or one where guys with fake tits and bra's are the norm, I dont think its one I should visit as its not of my interest. Its one thing if your someone whom has a medical condition and you are DOING SOMETHING ABOUT IT. Its another if your just being a ' drag queen ' or a ' female impersonator '. 

 

Theres a HUGE difference in WANTING to be a woman and going through whats needed to be done to achieve your desires in becoming one and just slapping on a pair of fake tits and womens clothes and ' pretending ' to be one. Guys whom wish to become women have medical and legal hurdles to go through. Im singing to the choir here.  

 

Most of the people *I* know can accept others whom have gender issues and are very supportive of them. Those same people can watch RuPaul or even catch a ' drag ' show and have no questions as they understand its a ' gig ', just like me with a band. They also know some are serious about transitioning to another gender and that those with such a dilemma need support.

 

There are situations though when I can see why they would question a guy with fake tits.

 

My sister-in-law believed this was just a fashion site for guys whom wear heeled or ' different then mens ' shoes/boots. She was left with a different impression. I have spoken with her after the ' blow out ' happened and shes fine, not at all mad but she did ask me " If your just into the shoes and clothes, why the hell are you on that site? ". 

 

I explained that this site is about ' fashion ' and she laughed and said " Really? Then we need to get you a bra and some fake tits! Double-D-cups! If your going to have them, flaunt them! Were going shopping tomorrow! ". She was spirited and laughing about it but knowing her sister has had girlfriends in the past, she does have some ' questions ' floating in her mind. I will say shes over it already. ( one down, several to go ).

 

Beyond making less frequent visits, Im also going to put the heels away for a while till things are back to normal. I can support fashion freedom, but at the present stage, and from what I have seen, theres just too many people whom wish to put their sexual fetishes on display then just being a ' guy in heels ', ' nicer clothes ' or ' mindful of style '.

 

*I* can fully understand the envy for women. They have the whole planet catering to them in clothing. They have the more desired body types. I feel there are some guys out there whom really do wish to be women but dont have the self-integrity ( or the balls ) to actually do something about it.

 

I have great admiration for Tara ( Dr. Shoe ). I dont know her personally. We have had conversations.. some where we agreed, some where we didnt. But *SHE* actually did something in regards to her situation. 

 

I would have the same admiration for ANYONE whom would find it in themselves to confront what she did head-on and get things going to straighten out their lives. I hope pumpcat is getting his ' ducks in order ' and will fully support *her* when she gets the ball rolling.

 

BUT!

 

I cant find it in myself, presently, after being questioned for something I didnt do.. after being accepted for who I am.. After going out and encouraging other men and women that ' wearing heels is ok '.. only to have to answer about another guy wearing fake tits and a bra.. ( In my opinion ) It really depreciates what others have struggled to accomplish in getting their lives/bodies sorted out. It ( transitioning ) not only effected them, it effected their spouses, their families and ( unfortunately ) their children.

 

I believe I know *why* the acceptance of men wearing heels is a long way off. We incriminate ourselves in *trying* to defend our choice of footware in the face of things were not at all about. There are so many people out there whom are too afraid to speak their mind. There are so many people whom worry about what people will say, or if they will loose their job or if they will be ridiculed in public..

 

Give this a thought : *WE* put a lot of roadblocks in our own way.

 

Best wishes for all,

Dan.

 

 

 

[Foxyheels]

I can understand where you are coming from, my general style is purely heels and jewellery sometimes with women's jeans and tops but I present as a male. That's not to say I don't fully cross dress at times but I believe that is not for this site. This site is about encouraging MEN  to wear heels in their day to day life and this is what I do 99% of the time. I keep the 1% away from this site as I was led to believe it was not appropriate.

I also agree we are in danger of moving from that 'heels as a fashion option for men' site as we seem to be accepting of more and more traditionally female clothing being allowed into pictures on this site.

 

I have no issue with any of it but we must have a clear steer as to what is acceptable as I agree with Dan that currently an independent would view this as a transvestite site. That's fine as I do identify as Transgender under the umbrella definition but I do think this site should remain a high heel site encouraging men to have freedom to wear them in a way that most of the population would describe as 'a man in heels' way.

[Gudulitooo]

ILK, thanks for explaining your opinion here.

I don't know what I waited for, but I wouldn't have written a post, only a comment to mods.

 

But only the "For the Guys" forum is clear. In the "for everybody" section, the issue is harder.

There is definetely something with the fact that the site do not support / is not used to one member posting many large pics of himself everywhere and taking all the screen, especially in topics that are not started by this member. I didn't read the rules tonight, might be allready stated somewhere.

[Chorlini]

Thing is, and I'm saying this as a guy who has no interest whatsoever in dressing up as a woman, other then wearing some heels, I don't think we should let ourselves be subjected to divide and conquer tactics from outsiders. Some of us will go further then others are comfortable with. And while I don't consider this a drag queen forum, there will always be a lot of ground in between men just wanting to wear heels and full blown drag queens with fake tits. 

 

In the end, does it really hurt to have this big tent, with pictures of some men going further then others? As long as its clear this is a high heel forum, not a men in drag forum. It probably doesn't help towards outsiders like this gossip circle. But then again I don't think this forum is meant as a place where we can bring outsiders to get to know us, I think of it as a place where we can be ourselves. Where we talk and discuss amongst ourselves. And maybe ILK's real mistake is that he used it as the former.

[AZShoeNut]

Howdy,

 

You know it is interesting, as I have attempted to explain my thing for heels to the handful of people that I have attempted to explain it to, I have run up against a "limit" with everybody but two people.  That limit takes the form of, "Well, I guess that I can handle this - at least you are not a this or that."  Fill in cross dresser or whatever else in the "this or that" place.  But to me I really don't feel that there needs to be a line anywhere to define a "this or that."  It seems like each person needs to have a limit that they can see that they have to stretch to and as long as that limit is there then they feel okay or safe or whatever they need to feel to accept you.

 

Among us we even have that limit.  Some folks are considered okay if they just wear heels for fashion.  Others are considered okay if they wear heels for fashion and maybe mild fetish.  Others are considered "bad" if they dig heels for fetish.  Others are considered "bad" for whatever other reason you want to add.

 

Personally I would just rather there not be a line in the sand so long as others or yourself are not being hurt.  Although, even though I feel this way, I understand limits.  I have a buddy that I can so stuff with in heels.  This buddy also likes to wear panties, lingerie, and the like too.  He has asked me a couple time to photograph him.  My experience of limit comes up at those times.  I just do not feel comfortable taking pictures of a guy in panties or lingerie.  That being said, I do not hold it against him.  I do not ask him to not discuss it with others who enjoy like experiences.  I simply don't do photo sessions with him and I encourage him to enjoy doing it with others.  I think that we can maintain personal limits without having to banish others who's proclivities go beyond our personal comfort levels.

 

This guy has a blog about fully dressing as a woman, passing as a woman, and being like a woman when he wants to.  I have read through several of her entries.  She wears false breasts.  Quite frankly his story parallels many of our stories.  In some of the pictures she looks like what I consider to be a pretty attractive gal.  The stories of first times out in public and the stories of arguments with his wife parallel many of the emotions that I have had.  His story of triumphs and joys parallel many of the experiences that a bunch of us have had.  I have no desire to discount him because he lies somewhere different along the gender identity line than I do.

 

Now regarding how this relates to this web site, well, it has been made pretty clear that this is a high heels web site.  That being said, I think that we all, or at least the guys, gain benefit from the freestyle fashion part of the forum as to wear heels out looking like a trucker doesn't always get the best results.  Where to draw the line as to what defines freestyle fashion and what defines something that some people might find offensive becomes a pretty challenging definition to make.  I am not sure where to take that.

 

Along the line of what Chorlini points out, I have thought using this forum to help educate others.  I have to agree with him.  The purpose of the forum is for us all to have a place to communicate, grow, and perhaps feel accepted.  Some of us this is the first place where we found acceptance at all.  It could simple be well to advise that this is not a place to educate the doubters in our lives.

 

I personally think it is to all of our advantage to sense when we are pushing up against our limits, ask if what is causing the pushing is really hurting anything, and then consider pushing the line out a bit further.  Many of us think that a lot of people out there can't accept a guy in heels.  Wouldn't it be great if they could push their line out a bit further?  If the world got in the habit of pushing their limits to accept people who maybe don't fit their ideas of what is acceptable out further then I think that people would get along a whole lot better.

 

Among us guys here, who all do something at least a little trippy, I think that we should have our limits set out pretty far.

 

Just my $.02.

 

Best,

Larry

[Shafted]

A good 2 cents, Larry. Where does one draw the line. It has often been stated in fashion that dress the body you have, not the body you want.

 

We look our best when we wear clothes that fit. This doesn't however mean that we have to restrict ourselves to buying from the men's department. You may really love that top from the women's department, that may have allowances for an ample bosom. If you get that women's top it's going to need alteration. As guys who wish to wear clothing originally designed for women, find yourself a good tailor. A good tailor will be able to make that garment custom fitted for you.

 

So when does alternative fashion become crossdressing? I think is pretty simple actually. It becomes crossdressing when one is emulating the female form. It really can't get any more basic than that. Modifying your body or assisting it to fill out a garment designed for women is crossdressing because one is creating an image of the female form.

 

If you are crossdressing by the standards I have just stated, you are going to have a long uphill battle for acceptance. We need to be real here. Denial is irrelevant.

[Guest]

Hear Hear Guys.

With reference to the "recent" pictures, I was quite surprised that they were not edited by the mods?

 

Dr Shoes transition wasn't heavily documented or at least I never saw anything prior to her current avatar and as such it is very tasteful and of high quality.

 

Pumpcats history, gave a couple of pictures of the direction being explored, subtle and open for advise. Once a decission was made a simple statement was made to us and again a subte picture to describe how she wishes to be, Noting that she felt she no longer belonged, only to be told she is welcome to visit and keep in touch.

 

I feel the forum matured after the major shake up <4 years ago or so with a couple of subforums being disposed of prior to the website upgrades.

Yes there is a predominately male input/membership that is seen filling the pages here. I would love to see the few regular girls add more content/comments within the forums as also many of the newcomers where do they stand, "come forward be brave talk to us all". Rules are to the foremost "don't hit on the girls"!

 

WE say this is a fashion site then for which ever gender we are then it should be adhered to. No I don't expect extreme materials, close to the edge styles or what "we" wore to last nights fetish club. It's about what we wear everyday out there on the street, casual and formal.

 

I have "reported" when I've seen a suspect posting, however when I have seen something that has been on the forums for a few days I do presume that either something is "in hand" or is now deemed acceptable?

 

Have WE, begun to be too lazy, shy or political correct to not flag something we feel may convey the wrong message?

I've had a picture deleted with me in a short skirt, no worse than JeffBs, oh well. The recent posts I believe we are discussing here are far beyond the "norm" that we are trying to get accepted.

 

The end line is that I would call for a review of the standards and expectations of acceptability (dare I add) "once again"

 

Al

[ilikekicks]

Great post Larry! You do point out where a lot of the confusion comes from and why many people feel ' uncomfprtable. Many people never even realize it..

 

 

This guy has a blog about fully dressing as a woman, passing as a woman, and being like a woman when he wants to.  I have read through several of her entries.  She wears false breasts.  Quite frankly his story parallels many of our stories.  In some of the pictures she looks like what I consider to be a pretty attractive gal.  The stories of first times out in public and the stories of arguments with his wife parallel many of the emotions that I have had.  His story of triumphs and joys parallel many of the experiences that a bunch of us have had.  I have no desire to discount him because he lies somewhere different along the gender identity line than I do.

 

 

Initially, you state ' this guy has a blog ', then preceed it by stating ' she wears false breasts '. The next line is ' Quite frankly his.. '..

 

I'm not one to believe that the majority of people wish to look down upon others. What I do believe is we ALL have problems with clarity in many instances. A good example recently was ' jim ' whom was having problems with his father. I know his first language is not english. I had trouble understanding parts of the message he was conveying and decided ' Best to stay clear then to maybe chance offending/misreading someone.. '.

 

( warning, going to be blunt people.. )

 

The same is implied in fashion. If you wear a miniskirt with your nuts hanging out the bottom of it, what will people think? If you wear something to prevent your nuts from hanging out the bottom, people will have a totally different viewing AND probably a totally different thought line about what that person is wearing. Its the SAME skirt though.

 

The same confusion can be applied ( and I understand why as it was explained to me by the confused person ) when a guy puts on a pair of fake breasts, a womans outfit, and struts out the door. If your a ' guy ' and not trying to be a woman , whats the *need* for the fake breasts?

 

 

So when does alternative fashion become crossdressing? I think is pretty simple actually. It becomes crossdressing when one is emulating the female form. It really can't get any more basic than that. Modifying your body or assisting it to fill out a garment designed for women is crossdressing because one is creating an image of the female form.

 

If you are crossdressing by the standards I have just stated, you are going to have a long uphill battle for acceptance. We need to be real here. Denial is irrelevant.

 

I agree with the Tailoring part. I have work done on the few mens clothes I have. Its tough to find a 28-30 waist with a 36 inseam. A belt bunches everything around my waist making things quite uncomfortable.

 

Your ' basic ' description actually is quite logical and simple ( as you stated ). It should be the standard used. No grey area.

 

Alsheels..

 

What Dr. Shoe has done and what Pumpcat is doing.. *my* opinion is its their lives and their bodies. If they wish to share with us what they are about, we should all feel blessed in some regards. If they choose not to present us anything, we should be happy we have the association of knowing something about them to begin with. . From *my* perspective, I wouldnt have the courage to do what they are doing/have done. I cant speak for everyone though.

 

 You asked :

"Have WE, begun to be too lazy, shy or political correct to not flag something we feel may convey the wrong message?"

 

There is a divide. Im presently experiencing it first hand as Im running for a part-time town counsel seat where I live. Its to the point where everyone is worried about offending someone. Eggshell pathways are normal these days because people truly are severely divided to the point where they will spew outright hateful things at someone and then claim ' im the good person ' without looking in the mirror. A LOT of it is by design to quell us as individuals to think for ourselves.

 

In the instance of this conversation, if someone cried to the mods and said ' this person broke the rules ', would they be viewed as a rat? a narc? a tattle-tale? How many people would say ' they are just using their freedom of expression to wear what they like and your infringing upon it! '. 

 

Theres those ' lines ' that have been drawn FOR us. You and I didnt draw them. Shafted didnt draw them. I dont think any of us here really wanted them to begin with as a ' collective '. As individuals we should be allowed to draw them for ourselves. In the same instances, we have to look over our shoulder and worry about someone else setting off the mob and putting it upon its rampage to re-introduce those lines once more..

 

There are all of 3 women I see posting on this site on what could be called a ' regular basis '. Dr Shoe ( Tara ), Amanda and Megan. I wonder if we as guys scared them off with things of not what we ' wanted ', but as what was presented.

 

When shafted announced ( about ) a year ago he was going to go through the galleries and toss out the ' tranny ' pictures and change that whole ' not telling ' part of the profiles to clean out all those whom were impersonating females ( after their trust was destroyed ), I decided to take a gander.

 

There were LOTS of ' Breasts ' in many of the pictures from MANY of the people from here. It wasnt just 4 or 5. It was much more.

 

There are some here whom might wish the opinion or a woman in regards to what they are wearing. Some might even ask for advice. The selection is quite limited as most of them have left.

 

Theres a big picture we really dont see in regards to running a website such as this and where those ' lines ' have been drawn. I dont believe at in in censorship, but I do feel we all should have a bit of self control and some form of consideration for the rules.

 

I have a form of net-nanny on a younger family members laptop. Its going to be there ( or some form of it ) till shes 13. I understand theres sites out there with certain content and whats to be expected of those sites. I believe hhplace to be a site about *fashion*. Clothing, shoes, boots, what wears well with what. Its really not about gender issues though they do ( and will ) come up as conversational pieces now and then.

 

I cant run to the Mods and complain about something of my own doing. *I* showed this site to my wife and others.   . If they ( or anyone else ) cant make an understanding and need things explained to them, that should be their problem and nobody elses. Unfortunate for all of us though, thats not how things work anymore.

[AZShoeNut]

Initially, you state ' this guy has a blog ', then preceed it by stating ' she wears false breasts '. The next line is ' Quite frankly his.. '..

 

Sorry 'bout that.  When in guy mode he refers to himself as he and in gal mode as she.  I haven't quite perfected my use of gender terms when describing the whole person who seems to be content to be comprised of both he and she.

 

I know this is a little bit off subject but that whole thing with Jim really took an unusual turn for the worse.  I initially thought that I could relate to him however it became clear there was more to his situation and mental state than his post accurately portrayed.  I wish him well but I had to bow out of that discussion.

 

Regarding the fake breasts the only thing from my experience that I can add to the conversation has to do with my two times out in drag on Halloween.  The first time I wore a french maid costume designed to be worn by a guy.  It looked a whole lot better than the Torrid dress that I wore on the second Halloween.  (Actuality neither dress looked that amazing because I am a hairy, heavier, bearded man)  I couldn't understand why the Torrid dress looked so much worse for a long time.  Then a couple years later I realized it is because I have an anti-hourglass figure.  The Plus size models on the Torrid website made the dress look good because they have breasts giving more form to the top of their figure.  I figure that if it were my thing to wear dresses but not actually be a woman then to make them look good at all I would probably need some false breasts.

 

Best,

Larry

[ilikekicks]

Sorry 'bout that.  When in guy mode he refers to himself as he and in gal mode as she.  I haven't quite perfected my use of gender terms when describing the whole person who seems to be content to be comprised of both he and she.

 

 

You realize that one aspect of his life is ' real ' and the other is fantasy or ' not real ' though ( like a part time hobby ). 

 

 

"I know this is a little bit off subject but that whole thing with Jim really took an unusual turn for the worse.  I initially thought that I could relate to him however it became clear there was more to his situation and mental state than his post accurately portrayed.  I wish him well but I had to bow out of that discussion."

 

I couldnt understand a lot of what was being conveyed myself.

 

"Regarding the fake breasts the only thing from my experience that I can add to the conversation has to do with my two times out in drag on Halloween.  The first time I wore a french maid costume designed to be worn by a guy.  It looked a whole lot better than the Torrid dress that I wore on the second Halloween.  (Actuality neither dress looked that amazing because I am a hairy, heavier, bearded man)  I couldn't understand why the Torrid dress looked so much worse for a long time.  Then a couple years later I realized it is because I have an anti-hourglass figure.  The Plus size models on the Torrid website made the dress look good because they have breasts giving more form to the top of their figure.  I figure that if it were my thing to wear dresses but not actually be a woman then to make them look good at all I would probably need some false breasts."

 

But you were in ' drag '. You were trying to fake being a woman. It was a costume on halloween.

 

Best to you Larry!

 

[Shafted]

To me the whole girl mode, guy mode thing wreaks of multiple personally disorder.

[weird1]

shafted you hit the nail on the head.

[ilikekicks]

To me the whole girl mode, guy mode thing wreaks of multiple personally disorder.

 

THAT was specifically mentioned in my ' talk ' with the ladies when I.. " had words " with them. Thats actually what started me flaming on them and questioning their intelligence levels.

 

Its one thing to enjoy the clothing. Im sure most women love the feel of satin. *I* like the feel of satin and have several button down collared shirts I wear when playing gigs. They are light weight, protect from canister lighting heat quite nicely, and my guitar straps never get caught upon them. They also look a lot nicer then a flannel shirt a lumber jack would wear .

 

I can understand Capris, Gonchos ( Gouchos? ) and other bottoms.

 

But fake breasts and a bra? 

 

Most whom question their gender.. from what I have seen and learned in conversation, wish to be one ' type ' or the other. They have accepted the hardships of knowing theres no ' part time guy ' or ' part time women ' situations that rest in reality.

 

If people choose to do such or try and live that way, good for them. Its their life and body. *I* just dont feel I should have to answer for it.

[Foxyheels]

Clearly there is no 'one size fits all' and the modern definition of Transgender quite rightly is an umbrella term covering many different types of people. There are all types of people and it's great we are being encouraged to be ourselves taking our own place on the spectrum of gender.

I accept what people want to be and some can clearly live happily crossing perceived gender types. Whatever makes people happy within the law is fine by me.

[Guest]

Dan, you and I are a lot a like. I don't wish to be a woman but I do love the shoes. That's why I am here. I think there are a lot of guys here that very easily pass as a woman and maybe that is the road they should especially if they are more comfortable with that life. There are also guys like me. I could never pass for a woman and I know I certainly don't look good as a man in heels, but it is about what I want to wear and not a look style. In fact I am about as far from " fashion" as you can get. I do like to hear about guys like me on here that like to wear heels, can't say I want to see them, but its good to know there are others out there. As for others, i can understand their surprise or shock to see a man in heels, after all it helps me to be able to wear heels everyday. Fortunately I have not really had to explain myself to anyone else. I hope to see you around here. You always have good stories. I played guitar for many years then took up drums. Also did front of house mixing. Not that good of a musician but my claim to fame is playing with Steve Bailey. Lost most of my hearing in my left ear so I quit.