First time "out"

[lra8313]

After reading so many posts of people wearing their heels "out" with no apparent problems, I wore my 3.5" sandals to the bank and store today for the first time. I was shaking the whole time! The store was very busy. If anyone noticed, nothing was said to me directly or that I could hear. Hopefully, it will get easier with time.

[Peter1]

Hi Ira8313!! congratulations for your first time out! I'm sure that your enjoy street heeling, isn't? I'm like you, although I wore heels since almost 1yr, I don't find the courage wearing them daily... maybe you can post a pic of your shoes and your outfit

[dblair]

Good for you Ira, and welcome to the club! I also hope for it to get easier with time, but after 7 or 8 months, I find that I am still quite nervous when heading out. The main thing though, is to keep doing it and don't get discouraged. Cheers!

[kfsteve391]

Congratulations on your first outing. It is so much fun to wear heels in public. I wear sandals, too. All are strappy heels.

[Histiletto]

Ira8313, You are not alone in your experinces of the first time publicly heeling. The shaking and butterflies are still around for me, even though it gets easier after you walk outside in your heels after making the decision to be a heeler for the determine period. If you are confronted, be honest about the reason(s) you are wearing heels. It is your decision and your responsibility to wear what you feel completes you. I don't know what your interest are beyond your desire to wear high heels, but whatever they are there was a time you weren't familiar with them just like publicly wearing heels. You probably thought constantly about them and did what you had to do in figuring out how to master those interest until you felt comfortable in having them be a part of your life. Now, you and everyone who cares about you can't imagine your life without those interest. Need I say more? You already have made the choice that you want to wear heels. No one else forced you to feel this desire. What you do from here is up to you. Should you decide to continue to openly heel, there are some in society who may taunt you, because there is a social declaration that you can't have the desire to wear heels, but you do. Someday, if enough male heelers will be open about their feelings, this social attitude will be proven incorrect, but this change has to start with a general knowledge that each man has the capacity to desire such things as wearing heels: be the range start from 2.5" high heeled cowboy boots or extremely high stilettos. This will only happen, if each of us share with others our desire to wear the high heels that fill or satisfy this personal need. Men need to learn the skills that women have achieved as they have endured/worked to equalize the status of everyone. Men haven't caught this vision, because they were smug being in their supposively superior positions of status and didn't see the need to change. Now their smugness has removed many of the options of choice they use to socially enjoy: like an array of appareling items that extend beyond the selections of drab and monotonous. Men could choose to express themselves as women have come to realize the necessity of doing as they also understood the need for equality. Why do women have a line of menswear in their options to wear?

[roniheels]

It will get easier and it will be more fun every time. If it helps to plan your outings, do so and follow your plan. I urge you to take your time, take it easy, and for heavens sakes, have fun. Good luck.

[HappyinHeels]

Good Morning Ira8313!!!!!!! You are in the right place for those that like high heels and appreciate the men and women who do too. Many here will tell you that virtually nothing will get said to you as go about in your heels. What might be said directly will most likely be positive...and be from a woman. I have said before that the most important tool yu can take with you is confidence. Walk with it and the world walks with you. After all, if you walk confidently in heels and look people in the eye, then most will conclude you are unflappable and fiercely independent. You WILL continue to step out a little hiher than before and you WILL have more fun doing it!! HappyinHeels

[morpho]

Good for you, it took time for me to take the decision but my first outing was directly with a hightigh 5inch heels stilletto boots, and i got the blast of the year, and one of the life. the first outing is 1 in a lifetime "ofcourse" but not speaking about the action but about the feeling. is and always be special, i still have pics about my first time and i recall the feelings i got that day. i can say almost everything i did that night and every 30 minutes what i was doing. fun and loads of fun. next time youll do your thing, do it at nite and take 3 tequila shots prior to your stroll. and go to a club.

[scrappycoco]

Ira,

I would like to say welcome and offer up some advise. I had talked awhile back about someone I work with getting there hands on this picture.

http://www.hhplace.org/picture.php?albumid=86&pictureid=1761

Now I will say if I was really worried about the fact that someone might have gotten there hands on some pictures of my self I would not have them out there. Anyway a little light on my job I work in the public service's field (easy way to put it) so I am constantly in the public eye. When i first made the choice to wear heels and skirts I worried so much about someone finding out. I went and talked with a counslar for over a year about all kinds of issues. Mostly trying to get my self past the neg. stereo types that are placed on men for doing "not manly thing's" but yet women can do both! I am in one of the most manly lines of work one can be in. Yet I also have some great women that do the same thing as me. So I think to myself all the time " Why can women come into this job and be who they are and not be made fun of? but a man can't? " I Also had a hard time getting comfortable with who I am as a person and how to relate to people better when it comes to me being me. So you are now asking how does what I am saying have to do with heels? Well let me impart some words of wisdom that was passed on to me by my counsler. " You can not control what other people think and say about you! The only thing that you can control is yourself! " I have come to the understanding of people are going to always find something that they don't like about you and try to use it to there advantage. If you are constantly going to worry about someone making fun of you for something you would never leave your house and go anywhere. So how does this relate to wearing heels? Here are my advise and though's.

1.) If you try to hide it than that is no diffrent than you saying it's wrong to do. You are enforcing the stereo type that men have to only do this or that, but women can do what they want. When I say "hide it" I mean from not wearing them where ever or when ever you want. Now that is all with in reason mind you. The worst mistake you can do is hide it and lie about it! You also don't want to try to make your self look like the opposite sex. My though is by doing so then you are going to raise the eyebrow and people are going to really start asking question's. Now mind you for me I don't run around and say hay look at me I wear heels and skirts. I just put them on and wear them as if they where no different than any other shoe. Because in all reality they are not! They are just a shoe!

2.) If someone see's you that knows you ,i.e you work with or are friends with, etc. Don't lie, if they ask tell them if they don't then don't. You will find most of the time people don't really ask. If they do the most often question you will get is " Your a guy why are you wearing heels?" to witch your reply is up to you! Above all just be honest! Don't try to lie and tap dance around the question just answer it! If you read some of my other post's you will see some of the encounter's I have had. When I post something on here I tell it like it was I do not stretch the truth, not saying anyone else on here does, I just tell it as best as I can recall!

If you read some of my post you will see that I have worn heels out to all kinds of different places. Most of the time after someone has asked me the question " Why are you wearing heels?" and you tell them the truth that is usually ends it right there. Now mind you people are going to look, but you have to think about it like this. It does not matter how you are dressed even if you where in all typical male clothing people are still going to look at you. Like most of the guys here have said it get's easier with time, but you have to go with the mind set that " I am who I am and if people don't like me oh well! " So i hope my words have helped you try to feel a little more comfortable wearing shoes! Congrats on your first time and just keep your head up it does get better with time.

[Guest]

I fully agree scrappycoco, well said!