robbiehhw

Thanks for the recommendation. I believe i have only one pair of that brand, some wedge sandals, but i do like them a lot. I registered and took the survey.

Very cool Steve. May all outside the box attire receive like acceptance.

2 hours ago, freestyle75 said:

@robbiehhw: After 4 months of HRT, everything that I got to that point stayed - and the growth was kind of amazing for the short period of time (dosage was administered by a physician, and I guess he didn't start "low"). I cannot go topless. Narrow-fit shirts at work only with a compression vest underneath; no swimming pool during vacations (it's a love/hate relationship that I have with what HRT caused). I would have wished that the result of my 80+ hours of painful facial electrolysis had stayed with me, but the beard came back to a certain extent. As they say: Your miles may vary.

Thanks! Yep these are important life decisions and yes you are right there is at least on thing that is not easily reversible and those are breasts. Like you, i was very receptive to those hormonal signals and will never being going topless again. (unless the venue is topless)

So many people i have known online and off, HRT has been a lifesaver. Like you say hopefully the growing acceptance of gender variance will also provide more and more options. (and more and more options/place to wear heels

Great clothes and shoes everyone. Dress the way you feel led and enjoy

I don't want to be debate centered in this thread and i can appreciate that some people explore transitioning and decide it is not for them, but that excerpt is not representative of 99% of what you read in the community.

You really need to make sure you have gender dysphoria or the hormones etc, may indeed make things worse for you, but if you do indeed have GD (and many of the things that go with it like depression and anxiety) then some of level of treatment and transition can save your life. It did mine. The vast majority of people you see in forums etc have said their lives got better after transition.  It is not an easy road for sure but the alternatives are often non-existent. 

Having said that though, there are many people that are gender fluid, non-binary, and somewhere on the transgender spectrum that do not have GD and do not need to transition. Also, transition can happen without a single surgery. Many of us started with bodies that in some ways match our real gender fairly well. The big expensive surgery is done by less than half of transgender people (way less than half at present), but it is still possible to feminize yourself very well without it. Some people of course have to in order to fully put their GD to rest.

Get the best support network around you that you can and get the best therapy you can afford. Make sure of what you really need. You will know before too long. This is why that people start out on low doses of HRT etc. There is very little that is not reversible. Be brave and be as loving to your parents as you can be.

Welcome back. As a transgender woman, i can identify with many of your feelings here and fears. Before when i identified as what most would call genderfluid now, i had some of the same issues about buying clothes. It does get better and better. Smile and be kind to the store personnel and i would estimate that 90% of them are very happy to help a transgender person. Some store chains are getting specific directions and training on this even.

Size 8 shoe is an awesome bonus. I'm a size 10 and i also feel blessed that i can find shoes in stock in most stores. 

As others have said, give your parents time and love. Keep seeing your counselor 

14 minutes ago, Pumped said:

The type and style of shoes plus the materials they are made of affect  the comfort level. Generally mid priced leather shoes will be more comfortable than low end man made materials. Two inch heels in a quality shoe should be easy, four inch might be a problem no matter the quality, but better quality should be doable for a longer time. My wife often brings two pairs of shoes to work and trades of during the day.

I have found this to be the case too. When i buy cheap but cute shoes i don't have high expectations for comfort or wear and tear. I wear them and retire them in one season sometimes. Mid-range leather shoes last. Here when you pay $100 you often start to get into that range. I believe everyone's shoe closet should have a mixture of both.

Bought some inexpensive but cute low heel sandals yesterday:

http://www.famousfootwear.com/en-US/Product/55005-1035897/B.O.C/Saddle+Brown/Womens+Lauper+Sandal.aspx

Nice heels! I think you are who you are and while you definitely need to be respectful of others, the way that society changes is that you change it. Early adopters pay a higher price, they always have. Can you imagine the double standards that exist that would even hint that a relationship would be hurt over your choice of footwear? When you think of it, it seems crazy but that is what society has done to gender, it's dominated and beat the stuffing out of it. Don't let it. 

When you say they might think the worst. What is the worst? Again when you think through it and get a little pissed off at our culture it helps

This is wrong in my opinion and a vestige of a dying patriarchy. Whatever dress codes are created should apply completely equally to both genders. This includes men wearing skirts, kilts etc, and women in suits and wingtips.

I do agree that dress codes in general should tend toward the more casual. Formal business dress creates another level of "have and have-nots" in society. Make no mistake about it, it was always meant to. 

Here in the Pacific Northwest, i can say that it is largely gone. You can see executives in jeans most days of the week. The suit still makes an appearance in government and a few related businesses, but by and large it is gone. I notice the difference between Seattle and Washington DC for instance, is fairly great in dress code. Elsewhere the more casual look is catching on. Even the traditional business casual of men in khakis and polo shirts is being challenged. 

On 5/5/2016 at 7:46 AM, Puffer said:

I can only say, with respect, that yet again you identify (and identify with?) a group or movement whose appearance and activity is about as far removed from most members' preferences as I am from the world of diplomacy.   These people are not going to influence the world markedly, thank goodness.   But maybe ... just maybe ... the world will be nudged slightly in the direction we would wish.

People have always said this about the youth but i agree you in relationship to the members here. Our demographic is older. The feminine male movement in that age group is still very early and i agree it will likely change the culture in many ways. The gender variant movement is related to this as well. 

I encourage everyone to look at the trans and gender variant blogs at tumblr. The average age of those folks is probably something like 21 and it gives you a feeling on what is to come. 

Bring it on for a better world. I think companies like this represent revenue opportunity based on that trend.

I like their concept, i hope they make a go of it. They should definitely get their web presence up to best practices. 

I don't mind their designs at all. Other than the less edgy George, the Chad looks pretty good.

As to the queer term in their statement, i can understand how that rubs people the wrong way, but to much of the younger gender variant crowd, queer has a meaning that is not fully associated with sexual preference and means something along the lines of "no labels, everything is fluid, don't worry about it " . There was an article i read not long ago and I wish i could find that talked about how they were taking back the term queer and celebrating it.

I've been rockin very light pinks lately.

In a sense the "toning it down" or being respectful to the more conservative (or bigoted) community is wrong. Change comes from fully embracing it and letting it go fully. I totally understand why people do it and i do too, but i don't like myself when i do. I also get compromises for spouses etc.

Change is coming fast thankfully.

Had a lot of sandal weather here last week in Oregon. Today it has reverted to rain so it is back to the boots.

I wear hosiery in appropriate weather. More tights than hose and sometimes thigh highs (stay up or with garters). I generally am preferring tights more and more though t depends on the outfit. The only times open toed shoes get hosiery is when there are tights that I'm obviously trying to contrast to the shoe and the rest of the outfit. The look of open toed shoes and anything but bare skin is a hard one to pull off in my opinion.

With boots i do a variety of things, think socks, boot socks, ankle socks, hose and tights

I go barefoot most of the time at home. In warmer weather it is socks, slippers or sometimes flats. I grew up not wearing shoes in the house, so i never really changed.

On 4/3/2016 at 0:34 AM, MackyHeels said:

Suppose people who comment want to voice what they believe everyone is thinking. It's wrong and bad taste in style. 

Yet I try to wear clothing that excites me. I've been dabbling in the colour pink and various hues, tones as my workout gear. 

As you might guess people can't seem to accept a male dressed so brightly or characteristically feminine colours. Just wearing that neon pink, buttery light pink, hot pink makes people glaring, giggling upon my choice of tops. 

As for a walk in pink heels or leggings people will accept it eventually having no choice if you wear it often enough. That is when they are familiar with your sense of style. 

No need to wait until October just wear it when the desire strikes your feelings. 

Find it invigorating when i wear something no female seen a male ever dare to attire. 

Life would be to boring wearing typical clothing and shoes expected for a male. Colours and styles gives your mind a subconscious joy at least that's what I believe in. 

Whenever I have to conform to a stereotypical male attire like a business suit I feel bit upset and bitter wearing it. 

Destroy the binary i say. I dress to please myself not others. ( and occasionally my wife, but she is pretty easy going about what i wear). The giggles and negative noises you sometimes see from people i just let bounce off me. Their issues do not govern my life.

Just today in a Starbucks - i am wearing sandals with bright blue nail polish. I have skinny jeans on and a plan blue T-shirt. I notice this college age woman starting at me and i stare back and smile, she knows she is caught and smiles back. That kind of pleasant scrutiny is just fine. 

On 3/27/2016 at 3:48 PM, pumpcat said:

I work in a male environment.  I'm the only woman there. People will not take me seriously if I dress too feminine. 

 

Would any of the guys get flack about publicly wearing heels and other clothes deemed female? Or would it matter. If more came out and wore them, then it would be no big deal. Years ago,enjoy were the heel wearers.  Then some idiot came along and said: they are too feminine, you can't wear them any more. Makes so sense, when the women wore flats. Wouldn't flats be more feminine? Clothes are just a social construct.

Clothes are totally a construct agreed. I don't dress super feminine for work or in general, but i dress feminine. I do agree that when more of wear heels, more of us will be able to do so without negative notice. I am doing my part nearly every day

Yes a changing society, means the way in which we deal with society's labels changes. I never really have an issue with political correctness and generally see it as a positive because its seeks the higher good for the most people. Being ultra-careful not to offend anyone is generally, but not always a good thing and if said behavior protects diversity even better. Still, the price to pay is sometimes confusion, awkwardness and at times communications can be made more difficult. I work in a fairly male dominated business and as a trans woman, i see i all the time. Guys who would have made certain jokes a decade ago in all company, catch themselves in mid sentence. (not only because of my presence but other people's as well )

In another forum, i saw many very liberal folks discussing a Chinese mall that had a "bra-unfastening" contest to celebrate international women's day. My response was "on what planet do you think this is at all ok, or even cute? "  My question was met with dead silence. 

I think both those dedicated to PC modes and those who are not have to be somewhat forgiving of one another. The more we communicate on common ground the better we all are. Because just like the terms around gender fluidity, dress, gender, transgender, etc are changing, so they will continue to change, no doubt.

I've had folks snap my picture while out and did not care. Often i would wave. This happened more when my hair was shorter and i was presenting more masculine, but it still does occur. I think the last time was xmas shopping, which was funny because i was dressed pretty casually.

We have teenagers but they have known of their dads femininity from earliest ages. Youth of today are remarkably less hung up on gender than even generation X was. We simply let them know that either gender could wear the other gender's items and they were welcome to as well. Neither has chosen to do so, but they knew it was ok. When i began to transition to my true gender, it was simply an update of that conversation.

Generally everyone goes barefoot or in stockings in the house, but they see me leave for work nearly every day in heels. I tone it down a bit at their events and things mainly because i don't want to offend anyone's cultural issues, but i still look and dress feminine.

Nice outfits - My style is similar but more urban - jeans, boots, tops, sweaters. Not ultra-feminine but i own zero male labeled clothing.

I really concentrate on being presentable at all times, for work or casual, even at the gym. I dress 100% femme but not particularly dressy or formal. I wear pink, i wear floral designs, i have some great wedges that have a nice floral design. 

A few people have snapped my pic in the past, no biggee to me.

On 1/24/2016 at 11:10 AM, Pumped said:

There are various manufacturers that make boots similar to these,

http://www.dsw.com/shoe/diba+pilot+bootie?prodId=335741

They have a 2 3/4" inch heel and are fairly generic style. I have a similar pair with a taller upper that I wear often and have had only one person comment on them. A friend commented in my "granny boots" and I told him he should get a pair. He has never mentioned them again.

I have those exact boots in black.