mlroseplant

This week I reached a milestone of sorts. Not a statistical milestone, but definitely a symbolic one. A little over 4 years ago, I ventured out for the first time in heels into a truly public forum--Bike Night, which is a monthly motorcycle rally in our town during the summer months. I have told that story elsewhere on this forum.

Last Friday night, I actually wore shorts and heels to Bike Night, which was a big mental hurdle for me. I have no idea why I have such a hangup about it, but I know the look is not for everyone. Anyway, the worst I saw was some lady with her family laughing pretty hard, and it was pretty obvious that I was the cause of her mirth. I saw a lot of phones out, but when I looked discretely, I couldn't actually catch someone videoing me. Iowans are generally polite that way, lucky for me. I ran into a coworker who seemed to have no reaction at all to my attire, despite the fact that we conversed at great length, maybe 30 minutes or so. I've never seen him outside of work before, so either he really didn't care that much, or his surprise was dampened by previous reputation (some might call it gossip).

Unfortunately, I didn't get any pictures. That's one thing that guys generally don't do--stop and take several dozen pictures of ourselves in the way that girls often do. My outfit was nothing really special, though. A simple turquoise colored t-shirt with plain denim shorts (about a 2" inseam) and Sbicca wedge sandals (about 4.5"). I didn't go all the way by wearing stilettos, but you could definitely tell I was wearing substantial heels. I got quite a few stares, but that's to be expected. So it was a nice outing.

On 8/12/2016 at 5:51 PM, xlheel said:

A few of my heel choices

I've always had a thing for oxfords, and I currently have 5 pairs. I'm always looking for just the right pair. If I were willing to accept a lower heel height, say 4 inches or below, I would probably own twice that many! Nice shoes, by the way!

On 8/12/2016 at 4:43 AM, Gudulitooo said:

Maybe we can find a little inspiration on lookbook, after all it is its role.

For the very slim and petite sized guys, it seems that a number of Philippine guys have ideas, for example

http://lookbook.nu/jeroy

http://lookbook.nu/look/4159410-Kenneth-Cole-Handbag-Forever-21-Highwaist-Belt

One is disturbing, while he never wears high heels, his photos look like he is: http://lookbook.nu/look/8331903-Tan-Suede-Boots-

Some are doning the "agender" or "androgynous" look

http://lookbook.nu/look/4021096-All-Saints-Shirt-Topman-Jeans-Where-Have-You-Been

http://lookbook.nu/look/3267589-Deepstyle-Jeans-New-Look-Shoes-Blazer-I-Like-Boys-In-Heels-3

For men that are a bit less slim

http://lookbook.nu/look/6200919-New-Look-Heels-H&M-Skinyn-Grey-Jeans-Asos-Leather

http://lookbook.nu/look/8220851-Weekday-Turtleneck-Bershka-Skinny-Jeans-New

Or normal

http://lookbook.nu/look/7913768-Zara-Eyewear-H&M-Black-Jumpsuit-Moschino-Bangle
http://lookbook.nu/look/7794670-Zara-Aztec-Blanket-Cape-H&M-Skinny-Denim-Mango

http://lookbook.nu/look/6342228-Black-Doesn-T-Crack

And for the guys that are more into dressing like girls

http://lookbook.nu/look/6710572-Fall-The-Season-Of-Fashi

 

Don't know if it helps. Many people try to harmoniously blend in heels for men. Of course you will not find black stilleto pumps.

I am always looking for ideas that might work for me. I feel like I'm stuck in a rut with my clothes. I have all these wonderful shoes and sandals, but I feel like I wear the same clothes over and over again.

One of the problems that I consistently face, at least in the summertime, is necklines that are cut too low for me. Even a V-neck t-shirt won't work for me for two reasons: 1) I am very hairy, and I already spend enough of my life shaving and otherwise removing unwanted hair. I'm not about to begin shaving my chest also. Having a pile of hair sticking out of the neckline of my shirt when I present an otherwise sleek appearance is not the least bit attractive. 2) Even if No. 1 were not an issue, I would have a tan line from work that really can't be avoided, except by drastic measures. Again, I'm not really willing to go that far.

In light of this, I feel my choices are limited when it comes to wearing shirts that lean toward the feminine side. Other than that, I would consider wearing some of the stuff depicted in the slim/petite links.

On 8/11/2016 at 7:12 PM, TXGuy said:

Still working up to being totally out in the open. I don't believe I'll ever get as far as shorts and heeled sandals though.  I do wear sandals at home.

Three years ago, I thought and did the same. Today, I wear shorts and heels out all the time. I do take into consideration where I will be going, but even a woman wearing shorts and heels would likely attract some unwanted attention. Still it's something I never thought I could do just a few short years ago, so you never know.  .  . Keep up the good work!

49 minutes ago, Thighbootguy said:

I don't remember if you wear your glasses out and about but a different style frame would complement the image you present.  It looks like the prices at Zenni Optical have increases by $10 across the board but they are still inexpensive.  Here is my suggestion: Glasses.

I sure hope that this style is coming back into style! The "Buddy Holly" style that has been popular for a number of years just isn't for me.

I'm up to 51 pairs, from 49 pairs about 3 months ago. However, I've finally been fairly ruthless about getting rid of some that I simply don't wear any more. In that time, I'd estimate that I got rid of 5 pairs, and bought 7 pairs. I'm still searching for a few items specifically: Knee high boots with just the right thinnish block heel of more than 5 inches (more difficult to find than you might think), Some super-high wedge sandals that do not have a super-thick platform (frustratingly rare), just the right pair of black patent leather stiletto oxfords, to be worn with a man's tuxedo (still looking), and a certain model of BCBG thong sandals (surely there's a pair out there somewhere).

Continue to keep us updated, Joe!

It has been a couple of weeks, and the situation has improved from "worrisome" to "occasionally annoying." The new boots have definitely helped (I should have bought new ones months before I did). I am still walking way more than I did before, because my crews are so spread out, but after asking, pleading, needling, begging, and threatening, my superiors have finally seen fit to get me a buggy (small all-terrain vehicle), so hopefully the situation will improve even more in the coming weeks.

Everyone's story is so interesting that I want to add the short version of mine! My undergrad degree is in Music, I have a law degree and am a member of the Iowa Bar. However.  .  . I've spent the last 20 years as an industrial electrician, and I plan on doing that for another 20 years if I am able. I have reached a very comfortable financial position (for me, anyway). So yeah, life and career might take you far away from your goals and plans in high school. I am not ever sorry that I spent a lot of time and money on my education. It shaped who I am as a person.

6 minutes ago, pumpcat said:

I meant the pic of you next to the silver car, so we don't get confused. 

Just so no one else gets confused, that's not a picture of Jeff. 

Disgustingly hot here in the Midwest U.S. as well. Outside of work, I never wear anything but sandals, unless safety concerns demand it. I know a lot of people mow in sandals, but that is a terrible idea, attractive as it may be. My favorite type of sandal is the slide or mule, either with a thong between the toes or without. I guess I am a man of extremes--I like either tiny, super flat sandals like those posted by dww, or I like them with giant heels, preferably at least 5 inches. The middle range doesn't do much for me. My wife seems to favor the middle ground, forever wearing 2-3" wedges. It could be much worse!

About a month ago, I was experiencing some tingling and discomfort in the balls of my feet. It wasn't really what I would call painful, but it certainly was bothersome. The most bothersome aspect of it was that I was afraid I was going to have to give up wearing heels. I think that perhaps I was developing a Morton's Neuroma, which is a thickening of the tissue around the nerves leading to the toes. I am still not sure if this is the case. I didn't have the exact symptoms, but it seemed similar enough.

Oddly enough, I generally found relief while wearing heels, but only certain pairs of shoes. Certain heels felt weirdly uncomfortable. After a week of not wearing heels (which was horrible), I finally decided that the cause was not the heels, but my worn out work boots. My job has changed somewhat, and I must now walk a whole lot more than I did before. I bought some new boots, and started icing the balls of my feet at night. The problem has largely resolved itself.

Has anyone else experienced these problems, and how did you deal with it?

It has been a mixed week, both in the professional world, and the heeling world. In the professional world, my job got shut down for the week because of safety concerns, and I have spent the last two days in safety meetings, trying to figure out how to solve the problem. No one at our site has had a serious injury, the worst was a broken finger, but several near misses were quite alarming.

In the heeling world, I have gotten more reaction than usual, both positive and negative. It's been hot here. Very hot. I can't quite bear to put on long pants to go out in the world outside of work, where they are required. But then, at work, sweating profusely is almost a requirement. Certainly an expectation. I've said it before, and I'll say it again, if you want people to notice your heels, wear them with shorts. I got an unsolicited comment the other night from a lady who was watering her garden as I was walking by on the sidewalk in front of her house. She said she liked my shoes, and that they made my legs look fantastic. I didn't quite know how to take that, so I just simply laughed heartily and thanked her. Twice. I did not stop walking, so we didn't have any sort of true conversation. At the other end of the spectrum, within a couple of days after that, I was mildly heckled by not one, but several groups of people. But they were all teenagers, all in cars. It still bothers me a little, but not like it used to. All I can say is, my son better not be out and about behaving like that, or there will be hell to pay. Actually, I'm quite sure he's not.

I hope you all have had a great week, but I'll be honest--I'm glad this week is over.

Hey there TBG, I hope your situation continues to improve. At least the back issues have not affected your ability to play. If you were an organist, that might be a different story.

It's amazing how much of the world people don't notice. My wife and I were at a backyard barbecue recently. Because I knew I would be spending 95% of my time on grass, I chose to wear the Sbicca Tristan wedges pictured below. Many of the guests have seen me in heels before, so I got zero comments. No big deal.

There was one head-scratching conversation, though. My wife and I were talking with a lady who was probably in her late 50s. The lady complimented my wife on her shoes, which were busy, strappy, lace-up sandals (sorry, no picture). She asked my wife where she got them, but before she could answer,  my wife happened to turn her foot to the side, revealing a very low block heel, certainly no more than 2 inches. The lady interrupted her and said, "Oh, those are heels. I can't do heels. My style is more like his sandals (pointing to my feet). A couple of simple straps that you just slip on."

Neither my wife nor I said anything, and the subject quickly changed to something else. But I couldn't help but wonder how she missed the giant 4 1/2 inch wedges on my shoes. I wouldn't have thought it possible, but it must be the case. I wonder what else people don't notice, even when they're paying attention?

9 hours ago, Tech said:

All said as Banter between friends... This is a hobby, not a job, so shouldnt be taken so seriously.

Nobody was knocking the fact that he chose to wear heels, only the choice of heels..

No different to any of your mates rocking up in a new hat that just looks terrible.. You not having a crack at them for wearing a hat, but you will have a crack at them if it clearly doesnt fit properly at all and is covered in plastic fruit and noisy bells to go for a quiet drink in the pub...

If your friend says they are getting rid of their crazy hat collection, you might say "Good idea, they looked mental anyway"..

Your not saying "Yeah hats are not for you", your just saying "THOSE style of hats have there place, and you are never in it"

Now that is the most sensible thing you've said in months.  .  . errrrrr, mate!

2 hours ago, Shyheels said:

Men in heels, or tall boots, are never portrayed in any way a regular guy on the street would ever be able to relate to, or want to relate to. It is invariably some weird androgynous look. . .   

My thoughts exactly. They always look weird. I'm sure that the general public might describe any one of us using that word, but I guarantee that we look better than these guys. 

I went to a bar last night with a few friends and coworkers to see our friend and coworker play with his band. As usual, I debated heavily about what to wear. In the end, I decided upon skinny-ish, dressy-ish pants with a polo shirt, and Michael Kors Oksana sandals in black, sporting 5 inch stiletto heels. Unfortunately, no pictures showing the shoes were taken, but it's basically the same outfit pictured below.

Two of my coworkers had never seen me in heels before, but my reputation has preceded me, and one of them either didn't notice, or didn't react. At all. The other one, a female, expected and anticipated my appearance, and reacted enthusiastically. In fact, she was my "bodyguard" the rest of the night, glaring at anybody who reacted to me with anything but a pleasant face. I really didn't notice anybody myself, except for three youngish men, who appeared to disapprove of my appearance, but who knows? They could have been discussing something else. It's unimportant. They did not approach me in any case, even though they were seated at an adjacent table.

Upon entering the establishment, I was immediately approached by a couple of women in their 40s who asked me how I could possibly walk in those shoes. We had a pleasant, if overly earnest, conversation about sexual orientation and gender identity. I think that I educated at least two people about such matters anyhow. One of the women showed me a nasty scar, a wound received "the last time I ever wore heels in my life." Evidently, she had fallen while wearing stilettos, and swore them off after that. I can't help but think that somehow alcohol was involved. The discussion then turned to eyebrow tattoos, as my female coworker had recently had her eyebrows tattooed in. The rest of the evening was fairly uneventful. 

I'm glad I decided to go with the heels, because every time I resign myself to flats, I always regret it. I don't ever feel right wearing flats. 

Also pictured below are my "bodyguard" and my pedal steel guitar playing coworkers. 

2 hours ago, Mr. X said:

It can be done, but only the right kind of heel will pull off the look successfully.

I have done the wedge thing with shorts too!  But I dont neccessarily consider that to be "heels".  When I say "heels and shorts"  I mean an actual thin heel.  Like a stiletto or something along those lines.  I don't see that much on women.  Especially around these parts!  It is usually a flat shoe like flip flops or something paired with shorts.

I think it's something that has become much more accepted in the mainstream fairly recently. And for some reason, it seems to be much more popular, at least here in the Midwest U.S., with Asian and Latina women.

My Vietnamese friend wears heels with shorts quite often, and I think it looks great! She did not do this just a few short years ago. Pun intended  

I realize that this is a general poll, but the reason I didn't put public full time is because I simply can't wear heels at work, as it isn't allowed in construction. Otherwise, I'm pretty much in heels all the time.

On 6/23/2016 at 2:39 PM, Rockpup said:

This is Florida. I've worn a suit 3 times in 15 years, my wedding, a friends wedding, and court

You are also not required to wear a jacket and a tie. You would be if you were a professional male classical musician, even in Florida!

But while we're on the subject of fancy dress, to get back to the original subject, isn't it funny how men aren't allowed to wear open toed shoes with formal dress, and women are? I can't imagine wearing sandals with a suit and tie, much less a tuxedo. It would look funny, I should think. To be fair, in a concert-type situation, there is often a prohibition against open toed shoes for the women, as well.

I am struggling with this one. On the one hand, it goes without saying that you should respect the couple's wishes, but if they know you already.  .  . well, let's put it this way, if it were me, whoever it was would say, "Could you please just wear normal men's shoes to our wedding?" and that would be the end of it. This has actually happened before (not at a wedding, however).

On the other hand, it's not like you're trying to upstage the bride or ruin her day. It's not like you're planning on wearing something so outrageous that the whole crowd will turn as one and forget why they are there for a moment or two. In fact, since you're wearing 100% normal men's clothing (except for shoes), I bet a healthy percentage of the guests won't even notice. There's a small part of me that gets riled up trying to imagine a situation where a woman would need to ask permission to wear something to a wedding. You're the one who knows these people. You'll have to make a judgment call on this one yourself.

Oh, and there's no way in hell I would ever wear those stiletto heels if I knew I was going to be on turf for more than just a few minutes, dry or not. There's just too much that can go wrong. If nothing else, I wouldn't want to take a chance on ruining my nice shoes.

Good luck to you, and let us know how things turn out! Don't leave us hanging, now.  .  .

On June 24, 2016 at 10:23 PM, Mr. X said:

Time for a new outing report.  I had planned on going out tonight but the extra warm weather just made my decision that much easier.  And to say the weather was nice was an understatement.  I arrived home around 9pm and the temperature was still 26 celcius.  Or 80 for you fahrenheit people.  Plus I had a recently purchased pair of sandals that I hadn't "broken in" yet.  So it seemed like a good time to do just that!  The outing itself was short and uneventful so I won't bother discussing it.  Lets get to the outfit and pics.

The Outfit
1) Brown t-shirt with thin colored lines
2) denim capris
3) brown leather handbag
4) Spring brand gladiator style sandals with double ankle straps and near 4" heel

And now, for Post No. 3 in a row! First, let me say that I think your outfit looks nice. At least in the summer, your style and mine are somewhat similar, except for the handbag. 

I was just wondering, do you ever wear shorts with heels? As we have discussed before, I don't feel I look good in capris, but I do think I look good in shorts, and I wear them often. Trouble is, I get a lot of unwanted attention when I wear shorts with heels, so many times, I will opt for flat sandals if I have to run to the grocery store or something. Or I'll put on long pants with heels. I find I get waaaay less attention either way. 

I would think capris would be about the same on a guy, as far as undesired attention. Does this ever weigh on your mind when you are deciding what you will wear? It seems so much easier in the wintertime. 

12 hours ago, Gudulitooo said:

Mr X,

Nice outfit. Are these your hair that we see ? How do you wear them ?

Sorry to stomp on this thread, Mr. X, but since I am married to a non-native English speaker, I immediately knew was was happening here. 

Gudulitooo, "hair" is a very strange sort of noun in English. It's not really what we call a collective noun, but we generally treat it as such, so we usually refer to it in the singular. Which means, what we would usually say is, "Is this your hair that we can see? How do you wear it?" 

I hope this clears up any confusion. 

9 hours ago, Jamie001 said:

I love your choice of sandals, however if you really want to improve the look with sandals i suggest a professional pedicure with fire engine red nail polish. You can never go wrong with red toenails and you will get a lot of compliments.

Red toenails ain't everybody's thing. Well-groomed feet, yes. I do my own ever since my favorite nail tech quit the shop. But polish? I think it's a matter of personal taste. I actually prefer natural nails, even on women.

It does seem that there is a buzz about gender fluidity in the media these days, mainly due to U.S. politics, but like Chorlini, I haven't seen ANY of it in my town, which is also a university town. I am the only man I've ever met who wears heels. Period. I expect to die being the only man in this town who wears heels. Although I am well accepted by a surprising demographic of people, not one of my male friends or aquaintances has ever shown the slightest interest in wearing heels.

However (brightening up a bit), I have managed to influence the women in my life somewhat. Two of my aquaintances who never wore heels just had to try them after seeing me constantly in heels, and now both wear them occasionally. A third woman has turned from an occasional heel wearer into a regular heel wearer under my influence.

If I'm any influence on guys, I'm certainly unaware of it. I imagine most of them simply think, "That Melrose, he a weird dude, but he's all right."