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Posted

Rock group 'Hell on Earth' has said it will go ahead with an on-stage suicide during a concert in Florida. Local councillors say they believe it is a publicity stunt, but still passed a new bylaw banning suicide for commercial or entertainment purposes. Xa


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Posted

Typical government! They even try and do you after you're dead!

Graduate footwear designer able to advise and assist on modification and shoe making projects.

Posted

don't you believe that a suicide is a little over the top? When you're dead, you are dead......and will stay dead for ever....no fast rewinds or instant replays...you're dead.

Being mentally comfortable in your own mind is the key to wearing heels in public.

  • 1 month later...
Posted

attributed to Wallis Simpson:- You can't abdicate and eat it ! Regarding being excluded from Royal circles after the abdication of Edward VIII in 1936. Xa

Posted

as a follow on from quotes about genius in another thread

Berlioz was a genius, not a scholar !

Camille Saint-Saens

Xa

Posted

Someone gave Samantha & I stickers that read "CAUTION! Female driver in 5" Heels!" for our cars. Another is the one that states "I want to be BARBIE! The Chick has EVERYTHING!". I still have both of them.

"Spike Heels . . a Pork-pie hat . .

Have on the mend in no time flat . . Ten Minutes 'Till The Savages Come by Manhatten Transfer.

Posted

Lies win sprints.

The truth wins marathons.

Michael Jackson (or his spin doctor)

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From a UK 'reality TV show'

Mother in Law .......... Hitler with boobies !

Xa

Posted

I liked a couple of Les Dawson's descriptions of his mother-in-law: "A face like a slate-hanger's nailbag!" and "A nose like a blind cobbler's thumb!" Cheerfully yours, Heelfan

Onwards and upwards!

Posted

That's a lot funnier than "looken like 40 miles of bad road." :rofl:

Being mentally comfortable in your own mind is the key to wearing heels in public.

Posted

Sophia Loren was once asked if she enjoyed her flight. Her reply: "It was a f***ing gas!" Not the language you expect from one of the world's most glamorous women. :(

Graduate footwear designer able to advise and assist on modification and shoe making projects.

  • 2 weeks later...
Posted

From a satirical TV programme:- By train, Paris is about 2 1/2 hours from London .... Birmingham about 9 Xa

Posted

I didn't know they told the truth on satirical programs! :(

Graduate footwear designer able to advise and assist on modification and shoe making projects.

Posted

.... attributed to Noel Coward I like long walks .... especially when they are taken by people who annoy me ! Xa

Posted

"If I were standing any closer to you, I would be behind you." --- Groucho Marx I used to have a cartoon above my work area. In it, two engineers were working on a complex lab project. Looking at the large collection of electronic equipment and components they were working with, one of the engineers said to the other engineer, "You know, engineering wouldn't be so bad if it weren't for all this technical stuff."

click .... click .... click .... The sensual sound of stiletto heels on a hard surface.

Posted

Isadora Duncan once telegramed George Bernard Shaw "Come to Paris and make a child with me! It will have MY looks and your wit!" :( George replied "Risk too great! Might think like you & look like me". :D :argue:

"Spike Heels . . a Pork-pie hat . .

Have on the mend in no time flat . . Ten Minutes 'Till The Savages Come by Manhatten Transfer.

Posted

Isadora Duncan once telegramed George Bernard Shaw "Come to Paris and make a child with me! It will have MY looks and your wit!" :( George replied "Risk too great! Might think like you & look like me". :D :argue:

"Spike Heels . . a Pork-pie hat . .

Have on the mend in no time flat . . Ten Minutes 'Till The Savages Come by Manhatten Transfer.

Posted

" .... snip.... "You know, engineering wouldn't be so bad if it weren't for all this technical stuff."

I can't remember who said this ....

Lord of the Rings .... a book read by engineering students called Dave.

Xa

Posted

"This is a song about religon, the other is a song about opening a pair of curtains" Bruce Dickinson said during the intro to "Revelations" off Iron Maiden's 1985 Live album "live After Death" he said that then they went into "Revelations" :D

Posted

I was at the 'Age of Enlightenment' exhibition at the British Museum yesterday. I was amused by this note on an exhibit, a stick about 50cm long and 2cm square with notches carved across it. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- From 1100 to 1826, tally sticks were used to record payments of taxes and other money into the Royal Treasury. Wooden sticks were notched with a record of payment and then split in half lengthways, one half given to the collector and the other kept as a receipt for payment. In 1834 there were so many in the store at Westminster, that they were largely responsible for feeding the fire that burnt down the previous Houses of Parlaiment. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- .... hey guys, it's Tax Return time again in the UK. I wonder what would happen if we all sent back our returns on the most inflammable stuff we could find? .... heh heh. Xa

Posted

Just dip them in petrol! :D That reminds me: What does the taxman and a penguin have in common? They cam both shove their bills up their arse!

Graduate footwear designer able to advise and assist on modification and shoe making projects.

Posted

Some interesting anagrams: Eleven plus two = Twelve plus one Mother in law = Woman Hitler And finally, President Clinton of the USA... To copulate he finds interns !

  • 5 weeks later...
Posted

. Nanotechnology could be the next big thing. ............... Lord Sainsbury (UK science Minister) ..... I suggest he sticks to trying to run a Supermarket chain with its falling market share. Xa

Posted

Dr. Shoe wrote:

hey guys, it's Tax Return time again in the UK. I wonder what would happen if we all sent back our returns on the most inflammable stuff we could find? .... heh heh.

It's also tax time here in the USA. I've often wondered what the IRS would do if everyone wrote their returns with disappearing ink. But, I think flamable stuff would be better. :D

Being mentally comfortable in your own mind is the key to wearing heels in public.

  • 2 months later...
Posted

From today's Independent ..... with a minor edit.

After the 'dodgy dossier' affair, when Downing Street borrowed information about Iraq's weapons from a doctoral thesis on the internet, you might have thought the Whitehall johnnies would have learned a lesson. Not so.

When a senior Foreign Office official gave a presentation about European enlargement this week, he admitted to having started his preparations by looking up 'enlargement' on the internet.

He found, to his amazement, thousands of entries - but not about the kind of enlargement he was looking for. His wife, he said, was not pleased.

Xa

Posted

There are "enlargements" and then there are "enlargements." Which kind of "enlargements" are you talking about?

Being mentally comfortable in your own mind is the key to wearing heels in public.

Posted

Bubba .... just type 'enlargement' into Google .... you'll soon find out.

Actually, I'm surprised about the amount of 'European enlargement' that comes up. I wonder, could the Euro bods be trying to create a blizzard of pro-Euro chaff to swamp any voice of opposition.

Politics aside, here's something lighter, just to even up my political bias.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Love is like measles .... you can get it only once and the later in life it occurs, the tougher it is.

Josh Billings, American Humourist

Just so long as it aint mumps ! ....... Xa

Posted

xaphod wrote:

Bubba .... just type 'enlargement' into Google .... you'll soon find out.

Ok, I did just that. I found a plathora of listings for various parts of the human anatomy -- both male and female -- as well as for pictures and photographs. Also included was: http://www.jeanmonnetprogram.org/papers/01/013801-01.html#P11_617

Since the USA isn't part of the EC, this really isn't a subject that would catch our attention.

Being mentally comfortable in your own mind is the key to wearing heels in public.

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