I know what you mean, I find what other wives allow interesting as well, albeit, just interesting in in no way judgmental on my side of things.
Wearing leggings, or as I call them “soft pants” is fine by her, but as much as both of us love high heels, I doubt she would let me wear them. I do not wear dresses, but if I could and did, it would be sweater dresses for most of the winter. For now, I am content to just let her wear them.
My wife unfortunately flip-flops though where your wives seem to be pretty consistent. Even with the leggings her and my daughters have long gotten used too, she flipped out when I bought “base layer pants” that were women’s. I had bought a pair of men’s base layer pants, liked them, but they had the front flap, and well, too much information here I know, but I am a haul-down-the-front-when-going-to-the-bathroom type of guy, not a use-the-flap sort of-guy. Her ex-husband did, so when I bought the women’s style because they lacked the front flap, she was incensed.
For me it is how they look. If I wear the men’s style outside, the flap makes it look like I am wearing long-handled underwear outside. If I wear no flap women’s style without a front flap, it looks like I am wearing tight black pants. I really do not see what it matters, but she flip-flops on what she is agreeable with.