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Tips for first time puiblic wearer


TXT-1

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Hello everyone, for a while I have had an interest in wearing heels in public but have been too scared to do it as I don't have the right foot wear (i have a pair of 3.75 inch chunky heeled court shoes, and a black patent sandals (6" inch /w 2" platform) the same ones as in my earlier post "new sandals for TXT-1" so I have a pair that is worn but servicable or a pair that is still good but VERY obvious. but the want isn't strong yet later, TXT-1

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Get yourself a pair of black closed shoes or boots with a modest (2 1/2"... 3 1/2") heel. Put them on with pants that aren't too short and you'll have to admit to yourself in front of the mirror that it looks very acceptable. Go out with those to do your normal stuff, and after a few hours you'll notice that even a 3" heel will give you a nice experience and still no-one notices! The want will get stronger after that and you'll regret not trying it earlier. Eventually you want to try more daring models when you have gotten comfortable with these. On the other hand, you may remain perfectly happy with a moderate heel, I for one, am very satisfied with a 3 1/2" boot. Go for it! You owe it to yourself, you are a person with own interests and the constitution gives you the right in most countries to express it! Bert

What's all the fuss about?

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Well here are my tips: - Get a pair of plain kneehigh or ankle boots, color black with a block heel and a kind of square nose. Height of the heel about 3 or 4". Be sure you can walk long distances in these, have no problem walking up and down stairs etc. - Get a pair of black trousers (jeans). With black trousers and black shoes, there's no contrast, so your shoes won't be noticed that easily. In my opinion the length of the trousers should be so they just show all of the heel. When I started wearing heels for the first time in public, I too tried the long trousers trick. I think it doesn't work, better show all of the heel, it looks much better. And believe me, although you'll be a bit nervous the first time, deep inside you want people to react. It can be very disapointing afterwards if nobody notices. - Be persistent with wearing your heels, specially in the beginning. If someone sees your heels and laughs about them, and the next day the same person sees you're not wearing your heels, he/she probably will be intelligent enough to realise that their making fun of your shoes caused you to stop wearing them. That would be a victory for them and make you more vulnerable. So keep wearing them even if some people make fun of you. Run some scenarios in your mind about how to react to different kinds of negative reactions, be prepared, and DO react that way then in practice. Women in trousers are easy to make fun of if they make fun of your heels (the argument 'you're wearing men's clothes'). Do this when other people are around, not when there's just the two of you. - Don't go into 'danger areas' the first few days, build some confidence first before you do that. Shoeshops with multiple young female assistants are the most 'dangerous' according to me. Be prepared to get laughed at very loud until you are at least 200m away from that shop. When they do start to laugh don't look or walk away, train yourself not to get a red head. Instead instantly walk very confident in a straight line towards to them, while looking them straight in the eye with a smile. Ask them about some high-heeled shoe in their shop, even if you're not interested in any shoe in their shop. Make a remark on their red heads ('hot in here, isn't it?'). And, although in your mind you'd very much like to give their barby-heads a treatment with your heels, be very very nice to them. Well, hope this helps Lion

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Must be a cultural thing between the Netherlands and the States...The very few who have noticed and commented on either my feminine avant garde jeans, high-heeled boots, or both (and in one case green nail polish that I actually forgot that I had on until too late to remove) have all been young women store employees in the 17-25 age range, and the comments have all been quite positive (they wish their boyfriends, or dads, were as progressive, etc.). I haven't actually risked buying heels while wearing them though, so I have no experience with them. Maybe shoe store employees represent a special breed? :lol:

"All that you can decide, is what to do with the time that is given you."--Gandalf,

"Life is not tried, it is merely survived

-If you're standing outside the fire."--Garth Brooks

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I think not wearing heels while going out to buy them makes the difference.

Lion

To be honest, I can't say I've noted that much difference. I buy heels whether I'm wearing them or not. Having said that, I've only been out shopping for heels whilst wearing twice. They were pretty good experiences both times, tho'.

Obsessed is such a strong word. I prefer to think of myself as "differently enthusiastic"

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Hi Azraelle, I can't believe in a cultural difference between the United States and the Netherlands. Otherwise there should be also a big gap between Germany and the adjacent Netherlands - and that's absolutely ridiculous. My own experience on high heels in Frankfurt: at least 90 percent of people behave as if you wear the most natural footwear of the world. Maybe stealthy glimpses of perhaps 5 percent. And at most 0.5 percent giving sarcastic comments (and that could be funny too: like those turkish teenie boys, hanging around in front of an internet café in my neighbourship whistling after me as if I were the most hot girl of town *g*) The day after halloween (meanwhile also very popular in Germany) I walked into my supermarket with black polished fingernails and asked the cashier girl for a remover. Showing her my fingers and saying "Looks nice, doesn't it? But now I'd like to get rid of it again, but I can't find any remover". She smiled very nice and stood up to fetch it for me. The situation was only a little bit awkward because of the long queue waiting behind me ... BTW: I have no scruples anymore to wear during the daily shopping my black 5 1/2 '' block-heel platform boots. With normal tight Levi's - no hidden heels. Anyway impossible with my 6.3 '' (1.90 m) height and 36'' jeans length. greetings of "2-Meter-Man" micha

The best fashion is your own fashion!

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For certain...there are cultural differences with every country... Even City to City. Bert, you advise was brilliant. So much, that I just might try to do the public thing soon. So far, with the exception of my wife, no one knows about the high heels. Lee

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Bert, you advise was brilliant. So much, that I just might try to do the public thing soon. So far, with the exception of my wife, no one knows about the high heels.

You're welcome. Does your wife support you? If she has her doubts, this is another good reason for starting off slowly - very few women have anything against a guy wearing 2 1/2" heels. And half an inch at a time is a good rate, except you buy heels every week :lol:

Bert

What's all the fuss about?

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  • 2 weeks later...

the most important thing is to be seen to be capable in your shoes. No matter what you wear you need to be capable and confident. If you do not appear so then you stand out. My advise is start with the heel style and height you can definitely manage under a variety of situations. If you can manage a stilleto heel on uneven surfaces and on hard ceramic tile or marble then you can start with a stilletto. Whatever you do you must be confident with so observers (if any) do not think twice. Your body language is half the battle. If you want to wear 5 inch stilleto pumps then you must have the skill and therefore you have the confidence walk with style past people. If you don't have the confidence you will walk faster/ avoid contact which leads you to drawing attention to yourself.

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