bladerunner Posted May 7, 2004 Posted May 7, 2004 Wanted to ask every body their views and experiences with having a family and heel wearing.How has it fitted in to everyday life?Any negative and or positive reactions?Is it better to talk to your children sooner rather than later? Reason i'm asking is that my wife knows but is not as yet interested in my hobby! / fashion sense.But when ever arguements arise she will inevitably have a dig at me about my 'desires' but not saying exactly out aloud.My children have often over heard and i have asked her if it would be an idea to let them know,but she refuses point blank.I can understand her concerns.Do i let them know any way or keep the 'secret' for her sake as well as theirs. I just love those suede heels!!!!!
bladerunner Posted May 7, 2004 Author Posted May 7, 2004 Twelve and fourteen! boy and girl. I just love those suede heels!!!!!
sendra45 Posted May 7, 2004 Posted May 7, 2004 HI, Sound like you should avoid this subject to me, they are at an age where you could falll out with them real easy. My advice would be to wait, but I have a long way to go before mine is 14! The angels have the phonebox.
Dr. Shoe Posted May 7, 2004 Posted May 7, 2004 I can't really comment because my wife and her daughter knew about it before we met and they had even seen me in full TV mode. Graduate footwear designer able to advise and assist on modification and shoe making projects.
asdf174 Posted May 7, 2004 Posted May 7, 2004 I agree with Nigel on this one. I would wait. I think 16-19 is a good age range possibly depeneding on how open minded they are at that age. It's all good. ~Arron.
sscotty727 Posted May 7, 2004 Posted May 7, 2004 I have two daughters, 5 and 2 1/2. My wife allows me to wear my more "masculine" heels (square toes/block heels) around them. The more femine ones I can't wear around them, even if I wear them in public under pants, not around them. Your situation sounds different in that they are older. I would discuss with the wife and do whatever you BOTH agree on. Scotty
Dawn HH Posted May 8, 2004 Posted May 8, 2004 I can see the problems of telling the children about your wearing heels, but the problems in one family may be different in another family depending on the circumstances. Unfortunately, the wife and I were not able to have children so I am the end of the line as the name and all stops with me. We didn't plan it that way---that just is the way things turned out, so that is one bridge that we won't be crossing. Cheers--- Dawn HH High Heeled Boots Forever!
chrissp Posted May 8, 2004 Posted May 8, 2004 My children are 4 and 7 years old. I couple of days ago my 7 year old son for the first time said anything about me wearing heels. The whole family where coming back from the supermarket and we were taking in the bags from the car and he said that I looked rediculus in high heels for they are for women. I said nothing right then but in the evening we went for a drive and I took this up with him. I said that high heel are not just for women and that men have been in high heels in periodes in the history of man. I also said the this made me feel good and that that is a good thing. He just said that he understand, and we have not had any talk about that after that. My 4 year old daughter just want to have some of my "heel shoes" for here self.
new_look Posted May 8, 2004 Posted May 8, 2004 doesnt your other half defend you when people are negative about it. I know jade would...
Dawn HH Posted May 12, 2004 Posted May 12, 2004 We haven't heard any negative remarks about my boots yet, but I'm sure my wife would back me up on them all the way. Cheers--- Dawn HH High Heeled Boots Forever!
genebujold Posted May 13, 2004 Posted May 13, 2004 I think the best advice I could possibly provide is to put your wife well above your heel-wearing. It's been my experience as a lay counselor that when men put their hobbies/interests above their wives, problem city is the result. When they put their wives first, and mean it, most wives will, given time, bend to a lot of their husband's quirks.
azraelle Posted May 13, 2004 Posted May 13, 2004 Oh Lordy, you have a way with words, gene. Had I heeded this advice in a timely manner, in all things, not just heel wearing, I'd still be married today. "All that you can decide, is what to do with the time that is given you."--Gandalf, "Life is not tried, it is merely survived -If you're standing outside the fire."--Garth Brooks
Dawn HH Posted May 14, 2004 Posted May 14, 2004 Genebujold:-) Azraelle:-) I have ALWAYS put my wife first in everything. She is my buddy and my sole-mate and if anything would happen to her I certainly would be completely lost. Next month in June, we will be married for 36 years. I have said this before and I mean it---I wouldn't trade her for a million dollars. It took me too many years to find her. We started out late as I was 33 years old and she was 26 years old when we got married. My hobbies have always come in second, and she has participated in them all with me, as I have participated in hers with her. We have always done things together and she is street-heeling with me as I learn to balance on chunky heels and she is extremely patient with me and encourages me and boosts me on. We also read and post together. She is getting to know you all as I am. Cheers--- Dawn HH High Heeled Boots Forever!
bladerunner Posted May 15, 2004 Author Posted May 15, 2004 Thanks for all your replies.It'll give me something to ponder on I just love those suede heels!!!!!
sscotty727 Posted May 26, 2004 Posted May 26, 2004 As you all know, I recently told my wife's younger sister about my heel wearing and she didnt think anything of it. She actually said the heels (block heels) pretty much look "unisex". Anyway, I also told my wife's older sister and she said she never even noticed me wearing them. Well, she recently went out with her daughter (she is in her early 20s) and this is what she just emailed me...... ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------- "Um, thought you'd like to know how observant your niece is....we were out yesterday evening for dinner at mall then went to out for coffee. My child told me that she noticed when we were out at the mall around Christmas w/ you and the family that YOU were wearing "pumps" or actually shoe/boots like Prince. I nonchalantly said, "OH?" and asked her what about it....she said, "oh nothing, it's just that it was a little wierd he had shoes with heels" I said some guys have shoes like that and there's nothing wrong with it. She agreed and I was amused that it took her this long to reveal what she saw....LOL. Gee, I must be blind!!!!" ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Anyway, not sure to take it as a positive or negative now that my niece things I am "weird". What do you all think? The good news is both my sister-in-laws think it is fine and my wife has eased up on her apprehensions. Scotty
new_look Posted May 26, 2004 Posted May 26, 2004 the thing id be thinking is that even though she called you wierd, youve got two forms of positive support, one of which has put your niece straight in her curiosity for you. now shes seen and is used to the idea, in future she shouldbe fine
Dawn HH Posted May 27, 2004 Posted May 27, 2004 Sscotty727:-) If I were you, I wouldn't worry about the niece. You have got two sister-in-laws and a wife on your side. In my book, that's a 3 to 1 odds. If the niece says any more about you wearing heels, let your wife and the two sister-in-laws run your interference for you and just be an innocent by-stander. Cheers--- Dawn HH High Heeled Boots Forever!
sscotty727 Posted May 27, 2004 Posted May 27, 2004 Dawn, To be honest, haven't told my wife that I told her older sister, she is known as the family "rebel". I defintely dont wanna tell my wife her niece noticed them because she JUST started getting more comfortable when her younger sister said they look unisex. She is now ok with me wearing them. If she now thinks people are noticing them, she will freak. My older sister-in-law is handling the situation and I will let her take charge. My niece is on the shy side (it took her 6 months to mention it to her MOTHER) so I doubt she would even say anything. On top of that, I am not very close to my wifes niece anyway, only see her at family gaitherings during major holidays and even then just in passing. Scotty
Bubba136 Posted May 27, 2004 Posted May 27, 2004 Wonder what the niece's father will say when she tell him about the "weird" guy in women's shoes that's married to her aunt? Being mentally comfortable in your own mind is the key to wearing heels in public.
Dawn HH Posted May 27, 2004 Posted May 27, 2004 Sscotty727:-) Just keep hanging in there, as it sounds as if you are not quite out of the "WOODS" yet. Cheers--- Dawn HH High Heeled Boots Forever!
sscotty727 Posted May 27, 2004 Posted May 27, 2004 Wonder what the niece's father will say when she tell him about the "weird" guy in women's shoes that's married to her aunt? Actually Bubba, she is having alot more "issues" with her dad than me. She is kinda embarrised by him. My sis-in-law just told me that her daughter wants her to meet her bf parents (sounds serious) BUT her and her bf agreed to keep her father out of it for now. He is VERY overweight and doesn't exactly have the best hygene. Ever seen My Big Fat Obnoxious Fiance? Well, he looks/acts almost EXACTLY like that (I feel bad for the guy), so I don't think she will be saying anything to "daddy" about me wearing heels Dawn - Nah, I think things are ok actually. I just think its best I let sis-in-law handle niece and stay out of it. Scotty
Dawn HH Posted May 27, 2004 Posted May 27, 2004 Sscotty727:-) Gotcha! I can see your point. Cheers--- Dawn HH High Heeled Boots Forever!
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