Bias against high heels?

[Roxyinheels]

It'll take longer than two months until you're good enough for their boy. Hey, who wants to be approved by the in-laws anyway?

I usually wear thigh highs, this kind of boots seems to me extremely sexy and elegant cause they glove the knees. But , since the 90's, we cant avoid from the silly stereotype of "Pretty Woman"....and I am looked down as if I were a hooker.

[Amanda]

I certainly wouldn't dare wear boots like that out and about. Not in my social or professional circles anyway. I know Alicia wears boots like that a lot, what do you think Alicia and do you have to deal with any obvious disapproval?

[alicia]

I guess bias is come from stereotype and jealousy. Especially when a woman work in the male dominated office. Because women today are highly educated, most of the men feel being threaten in anyway. Amanda i am sure you are not like me, i work in the female dominated office. Our dress code is way more feminine and professional.

[Amanda]

So I'm neither feminine nor professional? hmmm

[Roxyinheels]

Lately, I notice an immediate association between high heels, (especially boots) and transvestites or drag queens. I have nothing against them, in fact I like them, but sometimes, those comments bother me.

[janine]

I've gotten negative comments on two different fronts. As many others, the "CFM" shoes comments are common. The other though are the, "I need to tell you what's good for you" type of comments. I've had women both younger and older than me make comments directly to me telling me how bad heels are for my feet as well as my overall health. I can't believe anyone would come up and make suck statements to one they have never have met.

[PatsyCline]

Thank you all for this thread, you've made my day. I just had an unpleasant phone conversation with my Mom, who gave me a dressing down about ordering what she considers frivolous, an evening gown and heels. I tried to explain to her that they are for a formal occasion, my first since getting married, and this is what you are expected to wear. She was so mad she phoned DH to give him a piece of her mind. I'm waiting to hear the results of that conversation later.

[Amanda]

Surely it's only frivolous if the purchase is beyond your means?

[meganiwish]

No, it's spendthrift if it's beyond your means. Frivolous is to do with whether it's strictly necessary. There are those who can't enjoy frivolity and don't want anyone else to either. What flat lives they must have!

[Amanda]

Indeed, flat as an ugg

[Louise28]

Haven't had any big problems with heel bias in a while, i had a female boss a few years back who used to look down her nose and went out of her way to make life difficult, but like i say, that was a while back. I don't know what this manager thought, whether she thought i was being "tarty", she never said as much but you'd get snide little comments and things. she was a much older lady, and the person i'd replaced in the job she managed me in was a similarly older lady who she really liked. so maybe my face didnt fit. think she was just a bit of an insecure bully, serving out her time, frustrated coz she hadnt got to the level she thought she deserved, she'd pass sarky comments on my clothes, accused me of sucking up to the boss i was supposed to be supporting as an adminstrator (who by the way was gay) and i think just actually liked me) and then she accused me of incompetence and not long after that i left to get another job.

[Amanda]

she was a much older lady, and the person i'd replaced in the job she managed me in was a similarly older lady who she really liked. so maybe my face didnt fit. think she was just a bit of an insecure bully, serving out her time, frustrated coz she hadnt got to the level she thought she deserved,

I would imagine in that case that her attitude toward you would have been the same regardless of your wardrobe.

[Louise28]

maybe, i think she was a bit of a frustrated frump and saw me as a bright young thing who wanted to change the way things were done. maybe she was just jealous and my clothes were just a way to get at me as she saw it. have u ever encoutered that kind of thing?

[Amanda]

Lol, I would fire anyone who made derogatory comments about my wardrobe in a work situation.

[Louise28]

I'm sure you would, unfortuantely she was the boss, she used to criticise me to my face and i'm sure behind my back too, then she got the ear of the man who i was working to support and it became difficult. she used to send me on pointless errands which annoyed me no end

[diannega]

Hi Sangue, I have also regularly experienced the same bias, and more so in smaller towns. Luckily people in the cities will be less concerned about what others are wearing, but I have also experienced some bias at work where people  would not believe that someone can actually enjoy wearing heels every day. I love dressing classy, yet conservative.

[Louise28]

Hi Sangue, I have also regularly experienced the same bias, and more so in smaller towns. Luckily people in the cities will be less concerned about what others are wearing, but I have also experienced some bias at work where people  would not believe that someone can actually enjoy wearing heels every day. I love dressing classy, yet conservative.

 

Hi Dianne,

 

love the pictures btw classy as you say. I used to work in a smaller town and now work in a city, (both in UK rather than US) but i know what you mean about bias.

 

What sort of behavoiour from colleagues made you think that they were biased against you?

 

Louise

[diannega]

Hi Louise,

 

It was noticeable that people tend to treat you very differently, when you are dressed well and that also will differ from place to place. At work some of the "not so well dressed ladies" would like to joke about dressing for s.x or makes jokes trying to portray a well dressed lady in heels as a b..ch etc. I think it might come from some people having inferiority issues maybe and they can't understand why someone loves dressing up if they don't have to.

 

when I travel or go to meetings its a very different treatment, as a well dressed lady are usually treated with more respect like opening doors for you, offering to help with the luggage etc...

[Amanda]

when I travel or go to meetings its a very different treatment, as a well dressed lady are usually treated with more respect like opening doors for you, offering to help with the luggage etc...

 

That's exactly what you will find.

Those biased against are merely jealous or as you mentioned chewed at by inferiority. I have to admit I quite like it.

I find vocalized bias generally comes from women and only very rarely from men and when it does it's often very mild and triggered  fact that I'm already quite tall.

Having said that I once heard it suggested that I was a "Brainless self harmer" which I had reason to believe was related to my footwear..

[Louise28]

"brainless self harmer" never hear that one before, quite a specific and detailed claim lol, and ridiculous as well. They do say people judge others on their shoes but that's pretty harsh, and untrue of course :-)

[diannega]

wow, brainless self harmer is definitely a new one, but it does say a lot about the person making such a comment too…… 

[Amanda]

wow, brainless self harmer is definitely a new one, but it does say a lot about the person making such a comment too…… 

Now you have me wondering...

[meganiwish]

Now you have me wondering...

Yes, me too.  The location had always had me wondering, and then I thought I spotted you on this vox pop https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U4yeqSgNxiE  You'd clearly had a hard day at work, but I think you made some valid points.  What was it like working on the buses?

[Amanda]

Absolutely hideous Meg, the busses are plagued with psychos. https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=G811lptNS0s

Yes, me too.  The location had always had me wondering, and then I thought I spotted you on this vox pop

You'd clearly had a hard day at work, but I think you made some valid points.  What was it like working on the buses?

[meganiwish]

My favourite bus to catch to Mum's is a little one and very friendly.  Lots of little old ladies gossiping.  Today I had to get the one that doesn't go so close and it was full of fat people (and I don't just mean fat, I mean  (sh) American  fat). A lot of jersey was worn, one with the name of a gym on the front and STAFF on the back.  I suspect the gyms are in league with the sugar companies.

 

At University in Liverpool I won the Tate Prize (years ago) the sugar chaps.  I was supposed to spend it on books, but strangely, books in the eighties had glass covers and were flavoured with juniper.

 

I was with my Ex, on our honeymoon (he wasn't Ex then) and we went from Dublin to Bray on the DART.  We got the nutter.  Then when we got off a man with a baby's dummy in his mouth came and talked at us.  Barbados? Ha!

[Amanda]

I think my last bus trip was my school outing to Bodiam Castle. I sat next to Elizabeth who was a good friend of mine and was for many years. It was too hot as I remember.

I also remember the impossibleness of trying to eat crisps (Potato chips) in secret.

[meganiwish]

Oh yes, I know Bodiam.  There's a steam railway that runs nearby, from Tenterden to Northiam.  And Guinness used to have their hop gardens there.  I'm told the hop they grew was called a Fuggle.

 

The only thing to eat on a school bus trip is egg sandwiches.  You can't get the proper nauseating smell from anything else.  If you can't hide a crisp, you can even less hide an egg sandwich.  Garlic sausage and houmos is quite insistent too.

[Amanda]

Megan that's really yucky.  And I would be willing to bet you've been on many school bus outings too.

the only public transport I use these days are passenger planes which do seem to have some sort of super smell removal, air exchange thingy. Thankfully there never seems to be any lingering of insistants. Not since smoking on board has been banned anyway. actually  I think it's been banned on all airlines by now.

[meganiwish]

Yes. I'd like to say I miss hot coaches full of excited and nauseous children, but I'd be lying.  I haven't been on a plane since 1999

[Amanda]

Well if that's the case then I shouldn't be in too much of a hurry to get on one if I were you .

I'm afraid It's all gone rather downhill since the bombing of those two towers somewhere in the americas.

Not to say that it wasn't already a downward spiral already but since then all the silly new anti terror measures have really taken the pleasure out of flying. If I had the choice I simply wouldn't fly anymore.

By the way I was recently surprised to learn David Bowie never flew anywhere did you know that? If he could manage I'm sure I can.

 

Where did you fly to in 1999?