Dangereous affair

[M-Cravyde]

Well I'm new here, my second posting.

I've read almost every other posting, and at all it seems to be on the right way.

But I personally can feel with your rumors and when you still had made the right decision for your head, there’s always a different feeling, I think.

And I can feel with you!

In the middle of last year, my wife was mostly in duty with the kids and not “with me” a very attractive young Lady (seemed in the middle of the twenties) entered my our company. I had nothing to do with her, but I could see her from a distance with her boyfriend. And there was a special on her.

Yes she was absolutely attractive and she had nice clothes on, but best of all she weard relatively high curt heels in classic shape for a normal day. My Phantasies were running crazy and there was no thought for working on, while she was there and enough time after, too.

Good, it was a nice one day view and no reason to get crazy thoughts.

In the evening at home there reached me the reality, lets say the opposite of what I had seen this day, but there were other times and hopefully they com back.

But the next day, she was back. Long Arm Jacket, nice skirt and another pair of courts, in other color and style but the same highth. That couldn’t be, was my thought, I'm the man that fills up the shoe board of my girl with gladness and goes with her shoe shopping, my wive isn't pleasant enough for this and here is standing the perfect dream of a girlfriend or wive!

I'll stop describing my further thoughts here, they were much more!

Maybe you have or had similar feeling?

But now let's go to the present day:

I'm still married, I love my wive and I love my kids and I enjoy every day with them.

Why now?

In my opinion there are always ups and downs, and sometimes comes the right Moment to talk about feelings wishes and thoughts, with your wive.

There were always times of love, when you and your girl would do almost everything for each other. But if there are other problems to solve first, to get free to talk about dreams, then solve them, there are smaller for sure, than the other way.

On the other will come the all day duty for sure too, but the problems with or from your left first live are still there.

So it is now in my live and I get from my wive, what I like to see, sometimes more, sometimes less. For the less times we have the agreement, that I can talk, communicate, write and look with and for other women, but lunch I’m having at home, with my family (could I say so?).

Maybe my thoughts and my personal story are a little help for you!

[legs777777]

Hello and thank you for the time you took in writing your reply. After almost 25 years of being married, I would love nothing better than to have things on a better standing than with my wife than what they are but, at the moment that might not happen, we both seem to have drifted very far apart, and are still drifting, so flirting seemed like a release and just a bit of fun. She is busy at home, I have been busy at work, ( long hours included ) I did mention earlier on this link that my boss and I have cleared the air and said that what we were doing was not right and agreed to stop anything else happening. Not that anything serious happened, a lingering kiss in the office no more than that. Problem there is that we do see one another through work quite often and being honest there is still feelings there on both sides. So my problem still exists, I know I should stop this, but I am struggling to, due to the fact that home life has been getting worse with no sign on the horizon that this will change. So when an attractive woman flirts back, I do feel very weak in resisting. And yes I will agree with the replies that follow calling me all sorts, I,m not proud of myself either. But life goes on so I will see what happens.

[johnieheel]

Pray!!!

[jmc]

I had a "trick" back before my wife died. Realizing that being attracted to a "member of the opposite sex" is as natural a thing a breathing, the question becomes just how to deal with it. When I found myself admiring another woman, I would focus on just what it was about her that I found attractive. It might have been her hair, the shape of her face, her figure, whatever. Then I would find that feature in my wife -- which wasn't hard, as she was rather attractive herself. At that point, the question became very simple -- do I want to risk something that is already a part of my life for something I probably cannot get? To which the answer was a resounding "NO!" I would use my admiration for that "other woman" to strengthen my love for my own wife. It worked for 2 1/2 years and I believe I would be doing it today if we were still together.

[pussyinboots]

I had a "trick" back before my wife died. Realizing that being attracted to a "member of the opposite sex" is as natural a thing a breathing, the question becomes just how to deal with it. When I found myself admiring another woman, I would focus on just what it was about her that I found attractive. It might have been her hair, the shape of her face, her figure, whatever. Then I would find that feature in my wife -- which wasn't hard, as she was rather attractive herself. At that point, the question became very simple -- do I want to risk something that is already a part of my life for something I probably cannot get? To which the answer was a resounding "NO!" I would use my admiration for that "other woman" to strengthen my love for my own wife. It worked for 2 1/2 years and I believe I would be doing it today if we were still together.

I'm so sorry to hear about your loss. It seems that this way worked well for you.....and whatever way that keeps people together is cool in my book.

[M-Cravyde]

It was matter to me, to think about your situation and describe my experiences!

Yes there are differences between our situations as being every day together and being 25 years married.

I don't know your private surroundings, but as I a already sayd there were times of love and agreement between you and your wife and if it's years in the past.

On this remindings I wanted to build up.

Usually my work day goes from 8am to 9pm, every 2nd Saturday and Sunday sometimes. Though I think I can understand, what you mean. I see my feminine colleges more often and longer than my family. At least because of this, and wanting everybody doing right, now I had a breakdown and I know what it's worth having time for family, but this only by the way.

Some years ago my wive wanted to do me a favor and wore very often any kinds of highheels and other shoes I like. Out of that sometimes we made pictures of that. By now it's often much to cold, not possible with the children going out and other causes why it's not possible to wear shoes that I like in the way I like.

In this time the formally described situation was. And yes there were several cases and causes why to break out and start a new life, even not e few women understood me, and encouraged me to go,not to talk about men.

No I didn't. Probably being a coward.

jmc

- do I want to risk something that is already a part of my life for something I probably cannot get? To which the answer was a resounding "NO!" I would use my admiration for that "other woman" to strengthen my love for my own wife.

Now I'm happy about it. For the first step I relieved my thoughts and feelings by posting in forums and writing stories about my dreams and phantasies, as I head seen on films or seen on the streets.

And then, carefully, gave her some articles and stories to read. step by step. I wasn't able to “talk” with her. And stories can't be interrupted. In my opinion, she now got a better understanding and after wards over weeks and months it got better.

No, it isn't perfect, but it's OK in it's way.

pussyinboots

It seems that this way worked well for you.....and whatever way that keeps people together is cool in my book.

You have a fine base with your boss. Keep it and enjoy by respecting the borders and work “on your family”, may be your wife has unfulfilled wishes you don't know an can give her?

[Charlie]

I'm so sorry to hear about your loss. It seems that this way worked well for you.....and whatever way that keeps people together is cool in my book.

I'm sorry as well to hear about your loss.

Charlie