scrappycoco

Shoes look great! But wearing all black makes them really hard to see. Might I suggest some nude or suntan hose with the shoes so they stand out a little more?

Thanks all,your comments gives me courage

The boots Im thinking of wearing would be one of the two in frist picture.Ill keep my pleaser thigh boots for later,I dont want to shock her to death with the pleaser ones .

Ok my two cents. While I am not a big fan of the thigh high boots (Don't like on women or men Sorry) If you where going to wear those then the 2nd picture looks fine. What I don't think you should do is wear the first pair of boots with your pants tucked in. I feel if you are going to wear those boots like you are saying then wear you pants over top of them. If you are want to show off the boots that's fine, and trust me you will once you sit down everyone will be able to see them. Too me and its kind of hard to tell but I think those would look great with a pair of boot cut jeans or a skirt (if that's your thing) but not tucked into pants. Just my 2 cents.

I’ve been thinking about trying heels on in public and thinking about the best conditions. This will also be the first time wearing heels in public. I have not had the courage to wear heels in public yet. (Sounds a little like and AA statement. )

A few thoughts I have been mulling over.

Should I walk into the store with regular shoes, or wearing a pair of heels? One way definitely lets the sales person know who your buying for…

Small store vs big, ie, Nine West vs DSW? Hopefully a slow time…

With heels, since it is also the first time brings up a few questions, look for a small store in a strip mall? Or a large mall? It would be easier to get out of my car and walk into a small store, but if I had the guts to walk through a large mall, trying a new pair on in public would be probably be nothing compared to that.

Thinking of ways to make the first attempt successful vs crash and burn....

Ok I am going to say my though's. Some here may not like it and then some may agree with what I am about to say.

The first thing you do not want to do is LIE. You are looking at a pair of shoes. I have found it really does not matter what you wear into the store. The biggest thing is this. If you wear say sneakers and socks and want to try on a pair of heels then the sales person will have to bring you one of those foot thing's. If you wear heels and have nylons or something else on then you wont have to worry. I just walk over to where ever i want to look mens or womens. If they ask if they can help you say yes im looking for this or if you are not sure say when I find something I will let you know. What you don't want to do is stand there looking at the shoe and when they ask if they can help say no. What I have found is the more confidence that you show when you go into by a pair of shoes men or womens the more it changes the whole scope of things. Don't lie, don't act scared things of that nature. Above all don't walk up to the door and see there is a bunch of people in there turn around and leave and then come back later that will make you look strange and then they may start to wonder things. If they ask male or female if you are wearing heels or if the shoe you are bying is for you say yes. I have found that if you tell the truth and not lie you bying a pair of heels will become a moot point. Most people wont say a word. I think of things on this level when looking for a store for shoes. I don't care about the size of the store or how bizzy they are if they have what I want I go in and get it. I could care less how bizzy they are or not. People are going to look at you no matter how your dressed. Even if you don't have heels on and are in the mens section bying shoes people are going to look at you. It nature! As far as going out and bying your self a pair of heels while wearing heels that is up to you! If you feel confident enough then by all means go for it. If you don't then don't. With the help of people here and my wonderful tharipist I have gotten to the point now where I look at a pair of heels as another shoe. To me I don't see the shoe as male or female's shoes I see it as a shoe. Oh and by the way welcome to the club!

I was going to try to make it but sadly enough I have to work!

Well, I figure I would update everyone on how things have been going with this challange. Anyway after the last visit I have had with her in a skirt and talking about what we have talked about. It is very obvious to me that I will prob never reach a level where I can comfortably wear a skirt and heels as confident as a do pants and heels. I think after this last visit I had I know why. So now to explain. With the weather being as nice as it was I figured I would try the skirt and heels thing one more time with out her asking me. So I decided on wearing my izod jean skirt, a black tank top, my light purple mens shirt, nude hose, and my LEI Mj's. I think everything looked great together and was very pleased with what I had picked out. Well when it come time for me to leave and my wife seen what I was wearing to my visit, well I'll just leave it at that. Anyway I noticed that even leaving my house I just didn't feel comfortable and confident. I went dress like I was anyway. I was sitting in the waiting room for about 15 min. I was the only one there. After she was done with the person she was with he left and she came and got me. She said "Oh look you dressed up for me." Not quite sure what she ment by that but anyway. We talked for a bit about the issue I had with my wife before I left. Once again she was very jellious of my legs saying "Seeing more of your legs like this make's me wonder why you are not as confident wearing a skirt. You should have no reason not to be you have some of the best legs that I have seen in a long time." Yet she could tell by the way I was sitting in the lobby and acting that I just did not feel comfortable and confident in a skirt and heels as I do in pants and heels. She feels that after the deiscusion on last thursday that it all stems around my wife and the way she acts when I wear a skirt and heels. She feels that do to the fact that women when they are single will tend to wear skirts and dress's more to attract a mans attention than to wear them becuase that is what they want to wear. She feels my wife thinks I am trying to do the same. She also thinks that maybe my wife acts the way she does because she thinks I look sexy and for a women to like a man based on the way he looks in womens clothing is calling in to question her own sexuallity. For me it's really hard to say. I can go almost anywhere with my wife wearing pants and heels but would never be able to do that with a skirt and heels. So we talked about that and some other things after I left there I still did not feel comfortable being out in a skirt and heels. Who knows maybe some day I will but like I told my counselar that prob wont happen until I see more men being able to dress how they want where they want. Or until they start putting skirts and heels on the mens side of the isle. So I guess until then I will have to just wear my pants and heels and be happy I guess. I will post a picture of the outfit later today.

In that case you will have to consider what is more important: your mental health or your relation. Maybe time to see a therapist and get some advice there. (provided you find a good one).

Y.

I can agree with you on this as far a seeing a therapist. I have been seeing one for awhile now and can not tell you how much she has helped me as far as understanding this side of me. I am now at a point where i look at heels as just a shoe. It wont be until us men push the envelope and say look just because we where heels and other item's of a softer nature does that make me any less of a man. Just like women have said just because I don't wear makeup, dress's, or do all the girly stuff does not make me any less of a women! The sad reality of today is this! Men in general are put on the back burner when it comes to every thing. When I say this I am talking about mens health, clothing, and the list goes on and on. When was the last time you seen anybody do a charity event to help find a cure for prostate cancer? Yet it is proven that prostate cancer kills just as many men and breast cancer does women! The only difference is once you find out you have prostate cancer you might as well start picking out your grave! I know I am kind of ranting here but I read where so many guys say I want to wear this or that, I want to do this or that, but they don't! They sit in there house and live in fear and ridicule because someone might see them. It wont be until we men start doing what we want and taking back are freedom to be an indavidual and showing the world that we can still look and dress a certain way will we ever get to an even playing field. I am sorry for high jacking your thread just had to vent for a min. The best thing I would tell you would be to sit with your girl and talk to her about it to see why it bother's her so much. Try to come up with some sort of compromise and hope for the best. Would I leave her because she doesn't like the way I dress that is not for us to choice only you can do that. I have been able for the most part work out a little bit of a compromise with my wife when it comes to wearing heels and for the most part it works ok. Like I have said many of time's if you want to talk to someone that is in the same spot as you and is going through the same thing drop me a line. Once again sorry for some what hijacking your thread!

Ok well let me first start bu saying this. I am also a EMT on my way to becoming a medic myself. I too can truly understand how hard it was for you to let the people around you know about who you truly are. If you look back through some of my post you can kind of get the idea of what I went through. I won't talk about it here because I do not want to hyjack your post. Anyway here are my thought's. My wife is like you soon to be wife she does not like nor does she accept the fact that I like to wear heels and stuff from across the isle. It has taken me a very long time to get to the comfort level that I am at know where I can talk to people about how I dress without feeling akward. I have spent many of hours on the net reading thing's. Spent lost of hours talking with a tharipist trying to understand why I think the way I do. I too am like you in the fact that I have always like the way heels, skirts and what not looked. I as a young boy could care less about the fact that they where suppose to be for girls. Growing up in my area and time if you thought about it you where made fun of and got your backside beat by your parents. Fast forward to today. One of the hardest thing I have had to do is figure out how to be me and still be able to do my job! You know from being a medic it is really hard being in the public eye. You go place's and people are like hay I know you, you where in the paper the other day on this call or that. So when you dress the way I do and someone see's you one day wearing heels and then the next time you may run on them and they say hay I just seen you the other day wern't you wearing heels? It get's kind of akward. I guess the best thing I can tell you is this. As far as you S.O. goes it may have to be something that you have to agree to dissagree on if that makes sense? My wife does not like how I dress my girls don't mind one bit as long as I keep it with in reason. So what I have done is when I go somewhere with my wife and I want to wear heels I wear some that are low key! They are still heel's but they don't stand out as much. When I am by myself or with my girls I wear what I want. As far as work goes obviously you wont wear them at work. I have developed them mind set like this. Women come into my carrer field and are able to dress how they want away from work, gay's work in this field and no one say's a word, so why should it be any different for me because I like to wear heels? I guess the way I handle the work place and the people that I treat is this i they know me and they ask me about it then I tell them the truth I don't lie about it! If they don't ask or don't talk to me about it I just don't talk about it! There are for the most part a lot of people that I work with that know's. Do I wear heel's into off duty activites? Not for the most part unless the people that are there don't mind then I would. Then as far as the genral public I look at it like this! I dress how I want I wear for the most part women's pants and heels quite often. I go into the store's and try on my shoes that I want to by. If a sales person ask's me what I am looking for I tell them. I have found out that if you lie then it make's things worse for you! You are going to run into the someone that does not like it and there is nothing you can do or say to change there mind. So I think of thing's this way I can not control what other people think or say about me the only thing I can control is my self! I hope that I have helped you out some! If you ever feel like talking in private feel free to drop me a line. Because I can say I honeslty know what you are going through from both sides of the coin!

Ok so I read the article which was a very good article! Then I read the comment's needless to say I just went off! You guys should read it post your thought's on there too!

I have seen those jean's. While the idea (in my opinion is good) they should have just called them mens skinny jeans. I my self can wear skinny jeans because my legs are just way too thick for them. Those who can enjoy. I did look at them on the net to answer someone question I think they where answering those jeans are sized for men.

Ok so I guess this is where i differ from everyone here. Do I find high heels sexy? Some of them YES most of them NO. Do I feel sexy when I wear heels? Not really! To me it's not the shoe that makes a women look sexy. To me it's the attitude that the lady gives off and her hole over all look. I think (please don't get upset) but the vast majority of the women I know that wear heels don't wear them because they feel sexy! They wear them because they like the way the look, feel, or even to be taller. I mean I have seen a lot of women wearing flats that look just as sexy as one wearing high heels. My wife is a good example. Do to a MVC she was in a few years ago she can not really wear heels anymore. She wear flats alot. In her day to day look I find her attractive still, but when she goes out of her way to doll her self up that is when I find her sexy, if that makes sense? Now for me when it comes to wearing heels I don't find myself anymore sexy when I am wearing heels than when I am not. For me wearing heels is not a sexual thing. For me wearing heels is about wearing a shoe that looks good, and makes me taller.

I didn't push any of the voting buttons because there is not one there that says "I am not sure". I have not seen guys wearing heels for real except for a couple of times messing around at parties back in my teens and in photographs.

But why do guys wear heels? I wear heels to look and feel sexy but I am not sure why guys want to wear them. I am guessing it is not because they want to look sexy?

Christine.

Thanks for the honest reply. I would kind of like to tell you why I like to wear heels. 1. men's shoes are ugly 2. I have a small foot for a man size 7.5 so I have a really hard time find mens shoes to fit my feet. 3. @ 5'6" i like to be taller it makes me feel more confident. Like I tell my better half all the time if they made them for men that I could afford I would by them made for men, but they don't so I have to go to the other side. I feel no differnt wearing them as far a feeling sexy and what not. When I wear heels I just feel like me.

Ok first let me say this I am by far no fashion expert. If I had to pick a pair it would be between 1,4, or 8. If she says you have to wear a heel then 8 would be out. The answers would be a little eaiser if you could see the color of the pants better.

Note to self 1 make sure I look where I am going. 2 When walking up the steps, espc. one with thick carpet put just the ball of my foot on the step not the whole foot. Just my 2 cents. Just glad to see she only managed to break her toe and not her ankle.

I would say that if you are a true beginner that yes 4" would be to high to start out in, but since you have said that you have been wearing heels that are at least 3" I think you will be fine. The biggest issue that you will have is learning to walk in them with out looking silly. I think most would agree here that walking in a tiny heel takes a bit of practice. I have a pair of 4" pumps I wear sometime's and I can tell when I haven't worn them for awhile because my feet will bother me for a bit, but after a little bit it's game on. I can spend all day in a pair of 4" pumps without a problem. Although I tend to stick to 3" that seems to be a great height for me.

Hi, fellas;

I'm new here, and I hate to be disruptive, but I have serious questions that I would REALLY appreciate answered: by men, honestly.

Because you wear heels, do you consider yourself a crossdresser?

I do not consider myself anymore of a crossdresser than a women wearing something from the men's side of the store. I will say this and I have told my wife and both of my teenage girls this. If they would make heels, skirts or whatever for men and put it on the mens side I would by from that side. Since they don't I as a male don't have much choice but to by what I like from the other side of the isle. See it's hard for me to explain but I don't see clothing as male and female I see it as a stile i like and could really careless if it was sized for a female or a male. To me clothing whatever it maybe is just clothing. In the technical term yes I am cross-dressing since I am wearing thing's made for a women.

If you consider yourself a heterosexual crossdresser, and heels are 'merely' your favorite thing, are you only attracted to women who dress as you like to dress?

First I would like to say and I think most of the guy's here would say the samething are we techiacly cross-dressing? Yep but then again so are women when they wear something from the mens side. Merriam-Webster defines cross-dressing as this: Cross-Dressing (Noun) :The wearing of clothes designed for the opposite sex. So like I said in question 1 If they where to make heels, skirts and other thing's designed for men I can almost bet most of use here would by them. Also to answer a little further do I like it when my wife dress's girly,sexy or what ever term we want to give it? Sure do because as a man I see her trying to get my attention. I don't say it's the clothing that does that it's the attitude and the confidence that she has at that point that make's me more attracted to her and her over all look. It's the fact that she is showing thing's in a sublittle way that make me interested in her at that point. Does she have to dress like that all the time? No, but It is kind of helpful when it is just me and her going somewhere as a husband and wife that help make things more interesting.

If you have fantasies regarding being female, when dressed or not, do you fantasize about sexual encounters with men?

Now not to sound mean, but this question kind of agervates me a bit! I say this because I don't see clothing as deffining ones sex! I see clothing as deffining ones self! I feel no more less male wearing clothing from the womens side than I do if I am wearing all mens clothing! The same way a women can wear something from the men's side and still feel like a women. It's all about how you feel and not the clothing! There are time's where I feel more sexy and sapisticaed so to speak when I wear heels and what not, but then again I feel the same way when I am wearing say a Tux! I just can't understand why clothing weather it be men's or women's would make a man or a women fantasize about having sex with the opposite sex. I mean really if you wear a pair of men shoes, pants or what ever do you think about having sex with a women? Chance's are no! To answer the first part of the question no I do not fantasize about being female just because of the way I dress. NO!

If you are in a committed heterosexual relationship, how do your fantasies and dressing affect your relationship with your significant other?

Well to answer this question Yes and No. I say it this way because my wife does not really care for the fact that I like to wear heels, skirts and womens pants. All in all we have a good relationship and I go out to place's wearing heels with her and my girls quite often. For her where we run into problems is when people start looking and stairing, because my wife is a very protective type and does not like when people make fun of me or my kids. So at that point she get's a little upset, but I just let it be and thing's are good for awhile after that. There has been a few time's where I have went out to eat just me and her and we are both dress very nice by this I mean me wearing some sort of dress pant's, a nice dress shirt and yes heels if that is what I feel like wearing. For her it would be what ever she felt like wearing just like me. If she wanted to wear a skirt,dress or pants it would not matter to me it's the over all effect and the way thing's go that night that leads to the after date if you catch my drift. We have had some great time's after we have gone out however we wanted I think that is due to the fact that when she is able to look past what I am wearing and I am able to do the same thing we develop that connection again that we may have lost over time and that leads to some sparks in the bedroom. Plus it allows me to show her that I care for her for who she is as person not because of how she dress's or what she looks like. I did not marry her because of how she looks or how she dress's. I married her because of her personallity and who she is as a pesron! Look's are just a bounus!

I know these are intrusive questions (I HOPE I have the right forum for this), and I appreciate greatly your honesty in answering. If I'm being inappropriate:mecry:, please let me know.

As far as these being intrusive questions some may consider it to be so. Me I don't care one way or the other! I have no problem answering someone's question's because I feel by doing so it helps us men who like to dress a little different than other men show people that just because we choice to wear heel, skirt, dress, or what not does not make us a bad person or a freak. It just make's us a man that is in touch with there softer side so to speak and is not affraid to show it!

Thanks!

My question for you would be this. What is your real motivation for asking these question's? I just find it odd that someone come's into the group and ask's question's like this with out a reason, and since you have not really said anything about your self, which most o usf know you can tell us whatever you want, makes me wonder? I kind of almost feel like you are a collage student doing a paper on something that has to do with this subject and needs some answer's. If so that's fine but it would be really nice to know that so we all don't set here and form oppinions. Just saying!

Glad to see you posting again. I have always looked to you and your outfits for inspiration. Everything looks great! You where a very brave man wearing the shorts and stuff. I will say it did look good though. Keep up the heeling and having fun.

Well I guess I should explain a little more. When I met my wife she was all about being the girly girl if that makes sense. She never hardly ever wore pants she always wore skirt and heels and what not. Her hair was shoulder length and she was into her style and fashion. Overtime and a few children that all changed. Now her hair is shorter and she really does not wear as much makeup like she use too. I have come to accept her for who she is. It all I feel come down to the fact that she is so worried about someone making fun of me that she feels that she needs to protect me. Even before we married she was like this and would get really upset when someone would make fun of me and I would not do anything about it. She would want me to try to start a fight with them and would get mad at me for "Not standing up to my self" I just look at it like this, I pick and choice my battles and will deal with thing's my way and that be that. I know the question will ask do I wear heels cause she does not wear them anymore to which I can say no! I wear heels cause I like the way they look. I guess I get fustriated with her because I have choicen to love her and accept her for who she is not who I want her to be I just wish she could do the same with me.

Ok so i know it has been quite awhile since i have posted any of my outings so i figured I would give everyone some up dates. Just so everyone knows i have been out several different times in heels. For the most part that is all I wear anymore. Now granted my wife still does not like it but really does not say much until pushed by an outside force if u catch my drift. On one of my most recent outings i wore a black skirt and heels to see my counselor see my post labeled challenge given to me by my counselor . Anyway I will talk about my last trip witch was an all day affair in heels. For this trip I decided to wear my light blue womens jeans a light purple lens dress shirt with my new rampage mjs with a 3" heel and suntan hose. With that being said one of the first places I needed to go was staples to mail an item. Walked in with the family and nothing was said not so much as even a look. Next we had to go to walmart. Now I was a little more worried going in there for the most part things where going smooth until a young teenage girl and her brother where in the grocery isle and noticed I was wearing heels. Well anyway I watched them fallow me and my family around for awhile. I could see her looking at me and talking to her brother now me it did not bother so much my wife on the other hand fought notice and was getting upset but not at them at me. At witch point she started giving me greff and was calling me a freak. I just kind of blew it off and let it be. We did are thing and left. Are next stop was not so kind. We went it to an all u can eat china resteraunt. Things where going good until this table of 4 older people noticed my shoes. The first thing the guys did was point out to one of the women in the group what type of shoes I was wearing. Not I noticed it right away but did not say anything then my wife noticed it. That's when all hell broke loose she started bitching and calling me a freak once again. The only problem was she did it in the restaurant with the people sitting there and she wasn't really quite about it. I just kept my cool we left shortly after they did. Are next stop was target. Now I was going to go in there mainly cause I wanted to look at there shoes. Anyway when my wife asked if was coming in I said nope why would I want to go anywhere with u since I am such a freak! And left it at that. Later that night I needed to stop by the St where I work and pick up my charger for my phone. I wore what I had on all day. Before I left she said are u wearing that I said yep and started out the door she then said i wouldn't wear something like that into the place where I work. I turned and looked at her and said that's right you wouldn't wear anything like this period and left. Went I and got my stuff had a good conversation with the crew that was in duty. Now most of the people I work with know I wear heels but this is the first time anyone of them have ever seen me in them. Nothing was said. I came home and went to bed. I am at the point now I. My life to where once my kids are grown up I may start looking for someone of the opposite sex that likes me for me and not what I wear.

Well just to update everyone on my visit. The point of her wanting for me to wear a skirt and heels in for a visit was to see by my body language if I was comfortable wearing a skirt and heels. The first thing that she said when I walked in was that I looked great. We sat down and before we started talking she looked at me for a few min and said "I was right you just do not look as confident in a skirt and heels as you do in pants and heels" so we spent most of the visit talking about that. Trying to help me understand why I am not as confident in a skirt and heels as I am in pants and heels. One thing she said was that when she wears a skirt into the office the first thing she notices is that people act different around her. Compared to when she wears pants in. So thinking about that I kind of think that is why I am not as comfortable in a skirt and heels as I could be. I know even if your a female and you wear a skirt in to the office people male or female look at u different. So you take that something with a man that is wearing a skirt and magnify that 10x. She thinks that the thing I need to do is make one of two decisions. One being just don't wear skirts anymore and stick to womens pants and shoes or just put it in your mind like a women does and say to your self. I am happy with the way I look and I don't care what people think or say because at the end of the day the only one I have to please is myself. So I can say last night was a good visit and she really helped me to understand a lot about my self and why I just do nit feel comfortable in a skirt and heels. One comment that kind of made me laugh was she said at one point. If I had legs like yours I would never wear pants because for a man you have a great set of legs and they are really great to look at.

counselor.....

Any way today is the day I am suppose to go see her! I have debated all day long about if I should or shouldn't. Since it is almost 60 here today I can not use the excuess it's too cold. So I figure I will just suck it up and give it a try. I for the most part had decided on my light purple shirt, and black skirt. The only thing I was not sure of was shoes and hose. So I had my girls help me with that. I ended up wearing nude hose,with my black 4" pumps. So when I get beck I will let everyone know how it went. I can kind of understand what everyone is been saying. For some odd reason I just do not feel as at home in a skirt and heels as I do in pants of some sort and heels. Not sure as to why that is something that I hope my session today will help me figure out!

Ok as promised here is a link to all of the pictures.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/28727772@N04/sets/72157626012018022/

I guess for me the desire to wear heels does not come from weather or not my wife wears them or if I see another women wearing them. Do I like seeing my wife in heels sure do since she has a great set of legs, but since she hurt her ankle she really stay's away from them, or at least that is the excuss that she gives me. so with that being said my desire to wear heels come's from the fact that mens shoes are very boring and plain. I like shoes that stand out a bit always have. Do i care if they are from the women's side of the store? Nope! Will I wear them when and where I want? Sure will with in reason.

I would if she read any womens mag but she doesn't so I can't. Heck I can not even think of the last time she wore heels!

Well the question is why the hell is it specifically to the therapist that you would wear what you like ?

It depends how you consider the therapist : trust or not. Seems (s)he tries to change you, and the result will be up to you without (her) him taking any responsibility.

I will never be able to see a therapist !!

So at your place I wouldn't ask and go through it in my own mind. I know when I am ready. It is when I just act without asking me metaphysical questions.

Hope this helps.

I guess I need to clarify a bit more for you! I wear what I like to for the most part when and where I want. I wear womens jeans and heels all the time out and about. I have worn skirt's out and about 2 mostly in the summer month's and with out heels. What I feel she is trying to help me to do and realize is that clothing is just clothing at the end of the day. It is society that put the label on it and say's this is for a man and this is for a women. She asked me this question the last visit "When do you wear skirts?" It kind of cought me off guard to witch I said well at this point only in the summer month's. What she is trying accomplish I feel is getting me to the point where I will wear a skirt when i want or pants when I want. She is in no way shape or form trying to change me. What she is doing is trying to help me learn to be comfortable with who I am and how I choice to dress. I hope this help's out a little bit.

Ok on to some other comment after reading and thinking about what everyone has said this is what i will do (once the battery on my camera is charged) Since at the moment where I live it is cold I am going to wear a long black suite skirt. With that being said I have 3 diff color shirt's that I think will go good with that skirt a purple, gray, and dark green and I have 5 pairs of womens shoes that I think will look ok. I will take the picture's and post them on my fliker page along with a link for everyone to look at and comment. I know Dr. shoe say's I should wear one or the other but not both at first. So there will be a pair of shoes in there for her to see. Jk Dr. Shoe

In the end like everyone has said it will be up too me to wear what I think looks good. I am just trying to get everyone's oppinion first since that is where and how I build my confidence to wear what I want!

Well I guess I should be a little more specific in what I am talking about here. I feel the reason she is asking me to wear in a skirt, heels, and some sort of mens top is this. I talk all the time about wanting to wear that combonation out in public but I don't for some reason, why I have no idea. I go just about every where I want in jeans (mens or womens), heels and a mens shirt. The other combonation I just can not do for some reason. Why I just do not know. So by her challanging me to wear one in for are next visit I think what she is trying to help me do is to build the confidence I need to be able to wear the combo out in public. I asked for help from you guys here mainly becuase I respect everyone's oppinion here. Trust me the last thing I am going to do is let everyone here make the decison for me. In the end what I wear will be up to me. The one outfit of me wearing the dark blue womens jeans, the gray mens shirt, and my shinny heels my youngest girl helped me put together. I ask both of my kids all the time I how I look when wearing the combo of the three items. I take what they say and try to make it my own. To clear things up a bit. I have seen a counslar for years for a few reason's and one of them has nothing to do with how I dress:huh: This subject has just came to light over the years of talking to them. I hope this clears somethings up for everyone has far as my intent on this post.