scrappycoco

Thanks for staying on top of things shafted. That picture kind of made me wonder?

Scrappycoco, With your last outfit I would maybe try sheer tan tights. Sure the black tights might be a little less conspicuous out and about, but if you're going to get noticed anyway then I think the contrast of grey with tan really brings out the best tones in both colours and works really well with blue denim too.

I do sometimes, actually most of the time. I choice to go with the black because I was trying to match the total color scheme of the whole outfit. 

Hi scrappycoco, As I am losing weight I am starting to craft a look for myself. Can you tell us more about the jeans. What is the style? Did They come from the guys or the gal's side of the store? Thanks, Larry

Ok to kind of answer your question. Here is the skinny on the jeans. They are Bootcut low rise jeans from a company called Wallflower. They are a size 13 or 14L, can't remember for sure. If you have never worn women's jeans they are usually sized S/M/L as far as the length goes. These on me sit at just below my natural waste line. I have taken to wearing mostly women's jeans for the simple fact that they fit me better than men's do. These jeans are from the women's side of the store. I hope that help's you out. If you have anymore questions just drop me a line.

Well here is another outfit for me. Don't really have much to do this am other than go get my books for my next semester of school. I am wearing a pair of mid rise boot cut jeans in what use to be long length, until they got washed a few times and shrunk. I have paired it with a long sleeved black shirt with some gray and silver writing. I am wearing flannel gray ballet flats along with black hose. Over all I think this outfit world well for me. What's everyone else think?

Thank's guys. I think that outfit works well

Well it's been awhile since I have posted anything on the site, other than saying hello again. Anyway my style since the last time I posted has changed some, but not much. Still sporting my heels, like most of us here, but have also started to incorporate ballet flats into my styles also. I wear the flats on the days I don't really want to attract a lot of attention. Let's face it, no matter if you are a male or a female heels do that they get a lot of attention mainly just from the sounds they make when you walk. Most of my outfit's now sport some kind of jeans and heel or flats, flats escp when I am going somewhere with my family. Just about every pair of jeans I wear are "women's." I do however have a few pairs of men, but I keep those for the days where I either have to work or do something rough. I still wear skirts, when I do however it's out and about with just my self or I keep them at home. This is mainly just at home thought for the most part. My jeans and heels thought I wear them whenever and wherever I want.

This is my OOTD for today, not really planning on going anywhere since is -31 Deg with the wind chill. Just rocking a pair of wallflower jeans, pale pink button down with a black t-shirt underneath, my dexflex 3.75"t-strap heels along with nude hose. This is my style for the most part that I am comfortable with no matter where I am going. Hope everyone enjoys the look.

Well to answer everyone's question. I have been dealing with an injury to my right shoulder that required a surfy to somewhat fix. I also started back to college as a full-time student at the age of 40. I am working toward my BA in Social Work. Over all I have been doing well and still doing my thing as far as dressing how ever I feel like. I have kind of gotten to the point to where I wear ballet flats as much as I do heels. It just depends on the situation and where I am going and doing. Here is a selfie I took awhile back with me wearing flats

I've been away for awhile with a lot of thing's I had going on. Never fear though I still kept doing my thing wearing high heels, skirts and I have even started wearing ballet flats. I just want to apologize for being gone so long, but never fear I am back and this time with a vengeance! LOL With that being said here is a recent picture from an outing I had awhile ago. Really didn't do much other that go to pay a bill and go to my public Library. I will do my best to try to post more often. I look forward to talking with everyone again.

Ok I think we are all thinking about this way too much. Lol What I have found is that if you just "walk natural" you will be fine. Sure your stride is going to be smaller and you need to pay more attention to your balance, but honestly nothing else really should change. Like swaying your hips. The only reason a women does that is becuase of the way there natural walk is. If you watch some women sway their hips even when they are in flats. Its just how their bodies are designed to work. When I walk in heels my walk is no different than if I was in flats of some sort. Just saying.

No I didn't wear a skirt I kind of wish I would have just to see what kind of reaction I would have gotten. One guy did notice and would not quit looking at me. Kind of makes me wonder what he was thinking.

Well I guess I will get in on this too. This is what I wore today except for the red shirt. Black women's wide leg dress slacks, black dexter round toe pumps, suntan hose and the shirt was a blue/gray color. Wore this outfit to a court hearing this am. The second picture is what I wore yesterday. A dark red dress shirt, black just below the knee skirt, black dexter round toe pumps, and suntan hose. How does everyone think these outfit's look? Just wondering.......

If you read this thread, and read between the lines, pretty much everyone is saying that they'd love to have the freedom to wear whatever they want. Whether thats heels, hose, or a sundress. Just remember, freedom isn't free! You have to fight for it. You know. Like women did.

I couldn't agree more. I have said this for a long time. Until we as men stand up and say we have had enough of being placed in this "man box" we will never have the freedom to be who we are and we will always be forced to be who everyone else wants us to be. There is no reason why women can wear skirt, heels, hose or anything else deemed girly and still be considered in the same light as men. Until we stand up and challenge the rules we will always be stuck. It may cost us somethings, but in the end we are breaking the "man mold" for are son's to be them self not who someone says they have to be. Enough said!

The only reason I would want to would be to have the ability to wear what I want when I want. Do I like being a man? Sure do, but let's face it women have the freedom they do because they faught for that freedom. Until we start to do so we will always be stuck in are little box of man. Just saying!

Locally I am afraid. Still a closet heel guy. Away from home I wear lower heels (3" or less) only because I still walk funny in anything higher. I need more practice. Its no so much of being noticed "look at that guy in heels" rather than "that guy sucks in wearing heels".

It does take some getting use to wearing taller heels. Just keep in mind that your walk shouldn't change but the length of your stride should. There are many good video's out there that you can watch to help. Just finished.

There was an article awhile back that i read that talked about this subject. It came from a person that teaches run way models to walk in heels. In a nut shell what was said is you walk in heels should be natural meaning heel to toe just as you do with out heels. He went on to say some of the common mistakes made are stiff legs and the squeezing the thighs together. Do heels alter the way you walk? Sure because your center of gravity is forced forward, but your walk should not change. You need to focus on keeping your core tight and not being stiff. If you can do these things you will be ammazed at how much easier it will be for you to walk in heels and how much more confident you will look. Google hiw to walk in high heels if you think I'm pulling your chain. Steve

The book you read deals with people in general not paying attention to a particular individual. Does the book explain what happened at the second encounter with one of the 10% that noticed ? Also 10% of the people noticing... It is largely enough so that the only person you absolutely don't want to notice, is informed.

Scrappycoco, thanks for your effort. I hope everything goes well for you. But how is it possible to be ready for that ? Heelster's fears are legitimate and shared. i think he is right to be careful. I mean, the only preparation I can think of is to remember Calvin (and hobbes)'s "it is not fair" and his father answers "The world is unfair, Calvin". (accept the reality, and act as cleverly as you can to stay healthy)

Histiletto : Wow, you are bold ! In the same situation, I think I would have said I will be late (for any false reason) and propose to take a sick day.

Well there really is no easy to be ready for that trust me, but with the world we live in do you think for one second that if someone wanted to find some dirt on you about anything including the type of shies you like they can't? Can you hide it? Sure! Do you want to hide it? Well that depends on the person. I spent the last 5 years working full time in public safety. I was the first to worry about someone finding out and me loosing my job. Well let's just say that someone did and it spread like a wild fire throughout the company including pictures. Now I did a very good job of keeping things hidden some how someone found out and ran with it. What I found out through this whole thing was simply this. Don't lie! Be up front if someone ask don't get defensive and try to hide it. By hiding and lying it is the worst thing you can do. Some will laugh about it, some well say it's all about you and move on and then some wont care at all. What it come down tonis this. Women have fought for their rights all there life. Women would not be where they are now if it where not for standing up for their selfs and fighting for those rights. Until we men start doing the same things we will always be left wondering the what if's? Let me ask this one question if you walked into a shoe store one day and seen a pair of high heels on the men's side and they where sized for a mans foot and made for men would it make you think differently about how, when and where you wear those shoes? If so why? Becuase someone put a label in the shoe and put it on the mens side? I know we all havre are own level of acceptance (confidence if that is what you want to call it) In the end I am not telling anyone what to do all I am trying to do is show you what is the true reality of this "monster" that we men have created are selfs. Nothing more nothing less because in the end it's all in are mind.

That's all well and good except there is a reality to be dealt with. I've been around this business for nearly 20 years. I know what the job prospects are for someone like me in my fields of expertise, and I know that if I lost my current job, I would have to relocate. I know it would affect my wife's job too.

All those employee discrimination rules don't mean jack in the real world. You may win the case, but you won't be working there anyways. The costs far outweigh the benefits. No amount of honesty will change that. I've already felt the affects in my work history in this place because of what I don't do - - - I don't need to make it worse.

I understand what you are saying. We all have are worries and concerns when it comes to jobs and family. No one knows this better than me right now. The only thing I was doing was just trying to give you the confidence to be ready for that day when someone does find out that's all nothing more nothing less.

I got these pant boots at payless. These are a good looking boot and have a great fit thanks to the sale women that help me find the one's that fit me right. They have a 4" heel and a small platform.

Yes, I'm just a few miles south of you, but that doesn't mean much.

Three questions.

Would you walk into a Steel Mill locker room wearing heels and any other attire not from the mens work wear department?

Would you walk through the county jail without an escorted in a similar fashion?

Would you walk into a biker club bar in heels and a skirt?

If you answered yes to any of these questions, then either you have much bigger nads than me, or your not opposed to the potential outcome.

Ok to answer every question I'll do it like this. If I worked at said steel mill and was going to work? No

If I was going to a jail to be in jail you are not going to get that chance anyway.

Would I go into a biker bar wearing heels and a skirt? Probably not since wearing a skirt and riding are not a very good combo.

Look I understand what and how you think. I use to work in a factory did so for 12 yrs. Would I have worn heels and a skirt to work? No why because I was going to work and that was noy my work clothing. Now if I was going for say a union meeting where I didn't have to wear work clothing. I absolutely would! These are just my thoughts when you are looking at wearing heels or anything else you have to dress for the situation. The only thing I was getting at was this. What you do on your own time is your own biz. There is nothing a company can say or do when you are off the clock, off their property or you are not making any damaging comments on the Internet about them. Trust me I totally understand your fear. I think it is a guy thing to worry about the what if's. When I go places I think about where I am going and I say is this a place I am going practical for wearing heels and I leave it at that. All those places you asked me about not even a woman would wear heels there unless they where working in a front office, was an attorney going to meet a client or was riding bitch on the back of a bike and was going to party at said bar. I am not trying to tell you how or what to do. The only thing I am trying to do is help you have the courage to be yourself and understand that by hiding doesn't help you at all because as long as people see you hiding something like this they will have a totally different thought about you than if you are not hiding and just being honest with yourself and others. In the end it's only a shoe.

If I remember right we are from almost the same neck of the woods. I totally get what you are saying. Yes people can be very harsh sometimes, and I totally understand your fear about work, kids, and everything else. One thing I have come to figure out is this. If you are doing something to violate your company policies then sure they could get rid of you. Like say taking a picture of your self in heels in say a work uniform on company time then dropping it on Facebook that would probably cost you your job. That is where a lot of people dig a hole for their self by doing just that. What I have found in my time with my 2 kids is this. They know how I dress, I have talked to them about it and made them well aware of what could happen when kids at school find out. I have left the decision to talk to their friends about it up to them. To be honest most of the times it's not the kids it's the parents. When I have had a parent say or ask me about it I simply tell them the truth and I don't lie. I tell the parents at that point if they don't want me to dress like that around their kids that's fine and I won't because I respect their opinions and feelings. Just believe me when I say I understand what you are going through it's tough. Just know that you are not alone and things will get better just don't lie and hide things because people will not want to trust you. Just my 2 cents. Steve

Scared? Nope! I have just made a decision that it is not worth the risk. I don't think my close friends would have an issue, but I am certain my work associates would an I can not afford to take the chance.

Pumped, I just wanted to kind of offer a bit of insite to you on this comment. While this is just my opinion and please don't take offense to this. I use to work in a profession (EMT) where I thought the same as you. Then one day I figured out this. I what we do in are off time and off the clock and off of company time is are own biz. Now sure if your coworkers seen you out and about in heels you may get greef, but that's about it. Most people are not dumb enough to translate that to work because if they do well then the game changes. I had a situation awhile back where a coworker found out about the way I dressed from someone else and found some pictures of me and sent them out to everyone I worked with. Now sure I could have easily gotten him in a lot of trouble but he did me a favor. When people would ask me about it and how I dreessed I told them the truth and did not lie. Not only did I gain more respect, but no one cared what I was wearing. From a legal stand point there is nothing anyone can say or do as long as you are not breaking any company rules as far as social networking goes. So please don't let the fear of your job stop you from being true to yourself. Just my 2 cents.

Steve

I just picked up a pair of pants boots from pay less. They have a 4" heel with a small platform. I will post a picture when I can get to a computer.

Ok. I think I may have not sute though. I will take a look.

I've read much in many threads of this forum, about men's heeling mainstreaming, and ideas of that sort.

I want to ask your opinions, ideas, etc. on the folowing: Would you encourage your male kids to "free-styling" fashion?. Would you somehow encourage your male kids to heeling?. How would you do so?.

I

And here are my first two cents on this issue:

I am a single, heterosexual man - no kids that I know!. If I had a son, the same as if I had a daughter, for health issues I would buy them any heels - not even kitty-heels, until their teens. But if my son liked some shoes not labeled as "boys", that could pass as unisex with some ease, I wouldn't doubt in buying them for him - say flats, ballerinas, maryjanes, boots(ies), sandals, sneakwers, loafers, etc.

When grown up, as a teenager with a developing or developed taste for fashion and style, I wouldn't oppose if he would like to wear "femmier" shoes.

Would I encourage my son (if I had one) to freestyle?

Only if he wanted to. Men and women are different but yet in away the same. Not every women wants to be the girly type just like every man doesn't want to be the macho type. We all have are limes and dislikes. I think that no matter if it where my son or daughter I would encourage them to be who they are.

Rock on and post where you feel is appropriate for the topic. I give tg folks a lot of credit because I know how hard it is to be a man and step out of the man box. For you I can only imagine.