IHeels

Suppose I better get it started, thanks to Deb. Marillion and stilettos in the snow. Inga

Ben, I've done some ballet in the past, and ballet boots just don't duplicate the pointe position. There's a bit more to this than maths. On maths I won't get into an argument with you, seen your website and it looks like your a bit of an expert. Anyhow Laurie is only looking at extreme heels, like 7 inches, which if you have read my previous posts the're just a bit impractical. I have difficulty in understanding ballet boots would offer more support (with development) when as above they just don't duplicate the pointe position. (Going beyond mechanical stuff here) So be it, good luck to Laurie in her quest, read her posts on Jenny's site about this one, she's got a great sense of humour. PS: I've been to 7 inches or they were sold as 7 inch but actually 6½ and yeah there just not on for all day use. My all day height is generally in the range 4 - 5½. Ben your posts are interesting and give some of us non techies a chance of reply, you'll probably shoot me down in flames anyhow! Inga

Hi again here's another one. Subject: Cow politics FEUDALISM: You have two cows. Your lord takes some of the milk. FASCISM: You have two cows. The government takes both, hires you to take care of them, and sells you the milk. PURE COMMUNISM: You have two cows. Your neighbors help you take care of them, and you all share the milk. DICTATORSHIP: You have two cows. The government takes both and shoots you. MILITARISM: You have two cows. The government takes both and drafts you. SURREALISM: You have two giraffes. The government orders you to take harmonica lessons. PURE DEMOCRACY: You have two cows. Your neighbors decide who gets the milk. SINGAPOREAN DEMOCRACY: You have two cows. The government fines you for keeping two unlicensed farm animals in an apartment. AMERICAN DEMOCRACY: The government promises to give you two cows if you vote for it. After the election, the president is impeached for speculating in cow futures. The press dubs the affair "Cowgate". The cows sue you for breach of contract. BRITISH DEMOCRACY: You have two cows. You feed them sheep's brains and they go mad. The government does not do anything. EUROPEAN DEMOCRACY: You have two cows. At first, the government regulates what you can feed them and when you can milk them. Then it pays you not to milk them. After that, it takes both, shoots one, milks the other and pours the milk down the drain.Then it requires you to fill out forms accounting for the missing cows. CAPITALISM: You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull. HONG KONG CAPITALISM: You have two cows. You sell three of them to your publicly-listed company,using letters of credit opened by your brother-in-law at the bank, then execute a debt/equity swap with associated general offer so that you get all four cows back, with a tax deduction for keeping five cows. The milk rights of six cows are transferred via a Panamanian intermediary to a Cayman Islands company secretly owned by the majority shareholder, who sells the right to all seven cows's milk back to the listed company. The annual report says that the company owns eight cows, with an option on one more. Meanwhile, you kill the two cows because of bad feng shui. A FRENCH CORPORATION: You have two cows. You go on strike because you want three cows. A JAPANESE CORPORATION: You have two cows. You redesign them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk. A GERMAN CORPORATION: You have two cows. You reengineer them so they live for 100 years, eat once a month, and milk themselves. AN ITALIAN CORPORATION: You have two cows but you don't know where they are. You break for lunch. A RUSSIAN CORPORATION: You have two cows. You count them and learn you have five cows. You count them again and learn you have 42 cows. You count them again and learn you have 12 cows. You stop counting cows and open another bottle of vodka. A MEXICAN CORPORATION: You think you have two cows, but you don't know what a cow looks like. You take a nap. A SWISS CORPORATION: You have 5000 cows, none of which belongs to you. You charge for storing them for others. A BRAZILIAN CORPORATION: You have two cows. You enter into a partnership with an American corporation. Soon you have 1000 cows and the American corporation declares bankruptcy. AN INDIAN CORPORATION: You have two cows. You worship them. AUSTRALIAN DEMOCRACY Two cows are shipped to you. As they don't have proof of identity you panic and send them to a small Pacific Island. You are congratulated on having saved yourself the trouble of milking them. (For those that are not aware down here in Aus we're just having a little bit of trouble with foreign policy, in particular the processing of asylum seekers, and those in power thought it best to dump a number of these people in PNG and Nauru) Inga

Glad I'm not a blonde, anyhow here's the jokes I PM'd the other day. Sorry HH doesn't get a mention. SNIFFER DOG......... A man is sitting in a plane which is about to take-off when another man with a dog occupies the empty seats alongside. The dog is sitting in the middle,and the first man is looking quizzically at the dog when the second man explains that they work for the airline. The dog handler says to the first man "Don't mind Rover he is a sniffer dog, the best there is, I'll show you once we get airborne and I set him to work." The plane takes off and levels out when the handler says to the first man "Watch this." He tells the dog "Rover, search." The dog jumps down, walks along the aisle and sits next to a woman for a few seconds, it then returns to its seat and puts one paw on the handler's arm. He says "Good boy." He turns to the first man and says, "That woman is in possession of marijuana, so I'm making a note of this, and the seat number, for the police who will apprehend her on arrival." "Fantastic!" replies the first man. Once again he sends the dog to search the aisles. The dog sniffs about, sits down beside a man for a few seconds, returns to its seat and places both paws on the handler's arm. He says "Good boy." He turns to the first man and says, "That man is carrying cocaine, so again, I'm making a note of this, and the seat number." "That's marvelous, I've never seen anything like it!" says the first man. Once again he sends the dog to search the aisles. He goes up and down the plane aisle and after a while sits down next to someone, and then comes racing back and jumps up onto the seat and craps all over the place. The first man is surprised and disgusted by this, and asks "What the bloody hell is going on?" The handler replies: "He's just found a bomb!" Any managers out there: (unfortunately I'm one) We have all been to those meetings where someone wants "more than 100%." Well here's how you do that. Here's how you can achieve 103%. First of all, here's a little math that might prove helpful in the future. How does one achieve 100% in LIFE? Begin by noting the following. IF : A = 1 J = 10 S = 19 B = 2 K = 11 T = 20 C = 3 L = 12 U = 21 D = 4 M = 13 V = 22 E = 5 N = 14 W = 23 F = 6 0 = 15 X = 24 G = 7 P = 16 Y = 25 H = 8 Q = 17 Z = 26 I = 9 R = 18 Then: H A R D W O R K = 8+1+18+4+23+15+18+11 = Only 98% Similarly, K N O W L E D G E = 11+14+15+23+12+5+4+7+5 = Only 96% But interesting (and as you'd expect), A T T I T U D E = 1+20+20+9+20+21+4+5 = 100%..... This is how you achieve 100% in LIFE. But EVEN MORE IMPORTANT TO NOTE (or REALIZE), is B U L L S H I T = 2+21+12+12+19+8+9+20 = 103% So now you know what all those high-priced consultants, upper management, and motivational speakers really mean when they want to exceed 100%! Inga

Tom, Who played the three headed knight? You got one right Michael Palin, there's not many left to choose from and the animator (TG) isn't one of them. Anybody else know. Inga

Here's one from me, rather from the media. 'An Israeli thief found himself stuck in a life of crime when he tried to steal a car radio. The robber was leaning through a car window in the town of Beersheeba when he closed the electric window, trapping himself. The owner alerted by his cries, came to his rescue." Inga

Additive yeah, I sneek a peek probably more than I should. Inga

I suppose working for a gov't body I don't have that problem as there is a very strong access and equity policy in place, people are selected on merit. ie what you write down in your CV and how well you can chat (waffle on, trick people into thinking you're better than you are ) about about things in an interview. It might happen in places where the selection of people is less regulated. I admit I dress in a fairly formal manner (always in HH) at the workplace but quite casually once away. I think you'll find the same applies to many of the posters here. Inga <font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: IHeels on 2002-02-08 03:46 ]</font>

Smart move Matt, think I've mentioned this previously, buying online is risky as shoe lasts vary from manufacturer to manufacturer. Inga

Yeah I've inherited them Deb. The 4½ inch sandal is much more me. Inga

This one is borrowed from the guys board, sounds like fun. I have seen (and heard) many songs that fit in with wearing heels. Post any others that you know. Inga

Hiya, Just having a sticky think I'll put this one up on the gals board, sounds like fun. Inga

Highluc, They were big in the late 70's and early eighties, oh and what did you think of Sybil's style, I can't remember whether she wore HH. She may have. Inga

Tom your right about the rabbit. Have a good day. Inga

Think it was Tim the wizard (John Cleese). Who played the three headed knight? Inga

Wedgies oh no!! Looks like I have to race throught the next 100 to get to something respectable. Then again the boots do look a bit clumpy. Inga

Thanks Highluc, I've had no problems telling guys where they can acquire the shoes from as long as they asked the right way. Looks like you've got a pretty good idea on how you go about this one. Inga

Not my style either, however good on you, great to see someone absolutely rapped. Love that teminology - "kickass" Inga

Small platforms as long as there very small OK. No wedgies. Hey that thing was sort of scary too. :eek: Inga

Oh and one more sorry, I'm getting silly and this is the last: "Nothing like a good glass of Chateau de Chassilier wine, ay Gessiah" Sketch? Anyone seen the upper , middle and lower class sketch. I've read it in a book, brilliant, but never seen it. Don't think it was a MP sketch as it had the two Ronnies and Cleese in it. Inga

I suppose MP is a passion of mine, it all happened in my teens. How many of these can you remember: Mrs G Pinnet (Crump - Pinnet) Malcolm Peter Brian Telescope Adrian Blackpool Rock Stoatgobbler John Raw Vegetable Brrroooo Norman Michael (rings bell) (blows whistle) Edward (sounds car horn) (does train impersonation) (sounds buzzer) Thomas Moo... (sings) 'We'll keep a welcome in the...' (fires gun) William (makes silly noise) 'Raindrops keep falling on my' (weird noise) 'Don't sleep in the subway' (cuckoo cuckoo) Naaoooo... Smith. Merci, mon petit chou-chou Brian Trubshawe. Et maintenant avec les pieds à droite, et les pieds au gauche, et maintenant l'Anglais-Française Marche Futile, et voilà Inga Francis you should be able to work these out.

How many can remember this bit of gibberish? "First thou shalt take out the holy pin, then shalt thou count to three, no more, no less. Three shall be the number thou shalt count and the number of counting shall be three. Four shalt thou not count neither thou two, excepting that thou now proceed to three. Five is right out. Once the number three, being the third number, be reached then lobbest thou thy Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch toward thy foe, who being naughty in sight, shall snuff it. :lol What was the foe? Inga <font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: IHeels on 2002-02-07 10:31 ]</font>

Hiya all,

I've sent some of you the definative MPFC site.

Here it is again: http://www.montypython.net/fullsketches.php

If you have a reasonable sound blaster you're off and running.

Also I've seen a MP interactive CD, it even had a series of tastless messages you could load on your answering service. I remember one particularily bad one had something to do with contacting a society where memory was not one it's strong points.

Also there were games one which involved hitting cats, police and royalty on the head, think it was called the gofer game. :lol

Inga

I've seen some around to, sort of like pixie slippers. I suppose there OK if you're tall and have very long legs. I'm faily tall and have relatively long legs, On buying jeans (an item where the length has to be right not much margin for error here) I've tended of recent only to buy one brand in Aust 'Betinna Liano', she tends to make her cuts with 33-34" inseams which are great for me as they just cover the back of the heel (leaving most exposed) and hang straight with heels on. Inga

I don't think I could do that, anyhow I once heard of someone who bent the shank to enable a higher heel to be fitted. 1. I wouldn,t (probably couldn't) do that. 2. Wouldn't it affect the lay of the leather, seems to me the leather is cut to fit the last. It's amazing what you guy's get up to. :eek: Inga <font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: IHeels on 2002-02-07 09:21 ]</font> <font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: IHeels on 2002-02-07 09:22 ]</font>