JL Posted October 14, 2007 Posted October 14, 2007 Last night I went to the movies with my wife and there was one of many 'previews' for other movies before the start (if I wanted to see commercials, I'd have turned on the TV). Anyway... One of the previews showed a woman holding a pair of stiletto ankle boots with what looked like a 5" heel (kind of like the Pleaser Seduce 1020). I jokingly (yeah, right) said to my wife "those are for you" and she actually replied "I really like those a lot". If that's not a way in, then I don't know what is. I am going to buy them for her - she wears a 7.5US, so I am just trying to decide if I should go with a 7 or an 8... When they arrive and she puts them on, I know that she'll have a tough time walking in them. That is when I'll say "come on - how hard could it be??" and she'll say "you try walking in 5 inch heels and see what it's like". BLAMMO!!!! That's when I'll order them for myself. Even though I already have a pair of them (and they are comfy and easy for me to walk in) they are a bit... well... not-so-new looking. This could be fun. At the least, it will get her to see me in heels at her own prodding. Who knows?? Maybe I could make a 'bet' with her to see who can wear them the longest. Perhaps even go out for a bit of a walk around the block - in broad daylight!!!! So -- any thoughts as to the size?? If she's normally a 7.5US with a bit of a wider foot, should I get the 7 or the 8??? Men's 13W : Women's 15/16
johnieheel Posted October 14, 2007 Posted October 14, 2007 1st of all the best way in is honesty. Just tell her you have a passion for heels and go from there. Anticipation and planning these things never work but if you think it will then go for it. 2nd ,if she isn't used to wearing heels, don't start with a 4 or 5" heel. They will kill her feet and that will be the end of it but once again if this is your plan and if you think it might work, than get the 8's. They will give her a little more room for play and won't be so hard to get on. That's my opinion from experience. It also sounds like you are doing this for you and not her. This could lead to disaster. You should sit down and have a heart to heart talk about this before you jump in with surprises. real men wear heels
JL Posted October 14, 2007 Author Posted October 14, 2007 She actually does want them - we've seen those boots numerous times and she always says she wants them... Who am I to deprive her??? She regularly wears 3 and 4" heels to work every day... Again, if she wants them, I am not going to stop her. Am I doing this for me?? Well, yes and no. I think it will be a good way to tell her about my like for heels. Knowing what her response will be when she wears them is just my way of finagling the topic to one that could make it good for both of us anyway. Men's 13W : Women's 15/16
johnieheel Posted October 14, 2007 Posted October 14, 2007 OK, Here's what you do. Buy the boots for her and you. When she is trying them on, you go somewhere and put yours on as she does not yet know you have them. Then come out and tell her how great they look and wait for a response. If she doesn't like yours, you can always return them. real men wear heels
guyinheels Posted October 15, 2007 Posted October 15, 2007 I have to agree With johnie.....you shouldn't try to use your wifes interest in a pair of heels to come out with your interest. Be honest with her and tell her about you interest. Honesty will go along way and you won't freak her out quite as bad.
gwl1 Posted October 15, 2007 Posted October 15, 2007 Johnie is a smart cookie. His advice, as usual, is exactly right. Take it from a successful guy like him and do what he advises. It's low risk because you can send the shoes back if she really hates them on you. But if she's positive or neutral, you win, and you can tell her that you've always wanted to try heels. Good luck! GWL
new_look Posted October 15, 2007 Posted October 15, 2007 while i see your point jonnieheel on the other hand some people are not always open minded enough to be as forgiving. at least if he uses the method he stated he is in fact testing the waters and nothing to lose. if he puts heels on in front of his wife and she is really against it it may cause rows that may not be as easy to solve as just sending them back as he has obviously ordered them for a reason and there would be need to explaining which could make matters worse..... not to be negative, but if it was myself with a new gf and i really liked them a lot and they made me happy etc... would i wanna potentially give that up for a pair of shoes. therefore testing the waters is the way id be going about it too.
johnieheel Posted October 16, 2007 Posted October 16, 2007 while i see your point jonnieheel on the other hand some people are not always open minded enough to be as forgiving. at least if he uses the method he stated he is in fact testing the waters and nothing to lose. if he puts heels on in front of his wife and she is really against it it may cause rows that may not be as easy to solve as just sending them back as he has obviously ordered them for a reason and there would be need to explaining which could make matters worse..... not to be negative, but if it was myself with a new gf and i really liked them a lot and they made me happy etc... would i wanna potentially give that up for a pair of shoes. therefore testing the waters is the way id be going about it too. Then he should take my first advise which is to late and should have told her about his passion for heels in the beginning. Maby it's already to late. How does he want to spend the rest of his life? I know I could not have a mate who would not except my heels as they are a part of me. He is just going to have to decide for his self on what to do. Now honestly if it were me and I waited to long, I would just sit down and have a heart to heart before any shoe buying was done at all and see how she feels about me wearing heels. How's that? real men wear heels
Guy N. Heels Posted October 16, 2007 Posted October 16, 2007 I'm not going to get into the relationship. However, if the wife wears a US size 7.5 then you need to order a size 8 - minimum. For reasons that I really don't want to go into tonight, boots tend to fit much more snugly than shoes. So if the boots are only available in full sizes then you definitely want to step up to the next full size. If the boots should prove a little too loose then she can always put on a pair of thick socks. Keep on stepping, Guy N. Heels
chris100575 Posted October 17, 2007 Posted October 17, 2007 Not going into the relationship issues either, but if she's a 7.5 with a wider foot then as others have said definitely get the 8. If they're slightly too big then insoles or thicker socks will help but if they're too small they're going to hurt her feet. Chris
foxylady Posted October 17, 2007 Posted October 17, 2007 Then he should take my first advise which is to late and should have told her about his passion for heels in the beginning. Maby it's already to late. How does he want to spend the rest of his life? I know I could not have a mate who would not except my heels as they are a part of me. He is just going to have to decide for his self on what to do. Now honestly if it were me and I waited to long, I would just sit down and have a heart to heart before any shoe buying was done at all and see how she feels about me wearing heels. How's that? JL, I fully agree with Johnieheel. It is better to have a heart to heart before trying. When I met my wife a longtime ago, it was the first thing I did with her and told her what I liked and what I am.....If you love me...take me as I am, if not goodbuy. Eventually it is better being honest.... This just my thoughts. By the way a size 8 would be better. FL FoxyLady
felixmc Posted October 20, 2007 Posted October 20, 2007 I definitely agree with foxylady. When my last girlfriend and me came together, i honestly told her what i was into. It doesn't matter, if she agrees or not, the maint point (at least for me) was, that i showed her, that i was completely honestly with her. And that means in very privat level, as you can imagine. We went shopping two weeks later, but i couldnt convince her to buy (hey, i'd have payd the shoes i comented width a "great". But hey, we could talk on a very open minded level and that is much more than i recognize other couples talk. (And by the way, the girl doesn't wear 8cm high boots
L.K. Posted October 24, 2007 Posted October 24, 2007 I have had this conversation through at least 5 relationships. It has been my experience that since it isn't a "new" interest to you, finding a covert way to tell someone, or introduce it as if it is a new idea, is a little deceitful (I have done that), and can make things more difficult in the long run; trust is key here. It is interesting to think back and realize that regardless of the conversations i have had in my past, they have always turned out to be more of a mental obstacle to me than to my GF's. My wife on the other hand was a different story, as she is the most conservative of anyone I have been with. She is currently accepting of my wearing heels, but only in my own time, not around her. I know this will change in time. I think alot of it has to do with her upbringing being so conservative. Her most outrageuos heels were about 1.5-2" high when we met. I bought her first pair of 5" heels, which she has put on a few times. She calls them her "slut shoes". I think sexy, and she is working on realizing that they are. She also doesn't walk well in heels, and is annoyed that I do. It's funny I have years more practice than her! She won't even wear them to the Halloween costume party because her mother will be there and is afraid of what she would think or say. I offered to wear mine instead. Needless to say, that won't be the case. You must find your own way to let someone know. If they have truly accepted you as a part of their life, you will be surprised usually to find that a pair of shoes won't change things much, if everything else is in line. Just my 2 cents...
Recommended Posts