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Posted

My date says I have a fetish with shoes, and an obsession with a well kept lawn, particularly the cutting of grass. Admittedly, I take strong interest in grounds care, and maintaining a beautiful outdoor environment. Why not? It is good healthy exercise. Does that make it an obsession? Shoes are another thing. I am pretty gung ho about shoes. How many other guys have 200 pairs of shoes? This is still not an unhealthy thing, in my opinion. I think of it as a hobby. Some folks jump out of airplanes. Some race motorcycles, or swim with the sharks, etc. I like shoes with high heels; acquiring, possessing, and wearing. Izzat so bad? I find that an amusing pastime. Does it assume the status of fetish, or even obsession? We all have our quirks and peculiarities. Our little eccentricities. At what point does a quirk become an unhealthy thing? How about you? What are your endearing personal oddities? What sets you apart from the crowd? Can you share your obsessions and fetishes? That might be fun. ============================================= Here are dictionary definitions of fetish and obsession: fet·ish [ féttish ] (plural fet·ish·es) noun Definition: 1. magical object: something, especially an inanimate object, that is revered or worshiped because it is believed to have magical powers or be animated by a spirit 2. object of obsession: an object, idea, or activity that somebody is irrationally obsessed with or attached to make a fetish of neatness 3. object arousing sexual desire: something that arouses sexual excitement in somebody, e.g. an inanimate object or nonsexual part of the body ============================================ ob·ses·sion [ əb sésh'n, ob sésh'n ] (plural ob·ses·sions) noun Definition: 1. preoccupation: an idea or feeling that completely occupies the mind His obsession with figures led him to make crucial economic mistakes. 2. state of being obsessed: the state of being obsessed by somebody or something Their devotion to each other borders on obsession. 3. psychiatry uncontrollable persistence of idea: the uncontrollable persistence of an idea or emotion in the mind, sometimes associated with psychiatric disorder


Posted

Well on the shoes side I can sympathise. My gf (initialy at least) and a few other people have mentioned fetish when talking of my shoes. I take offense to this, as it shows how closed minded they are. If im wearing heels or womens shoes, im wearing them because I like the way they look with whatever im wearing. Why can't I simply like them? Fetish has got sweet FA to do with the matter. Not to mention I've got very small and narrow feet for a man and womens shoes tend to fit me a lot better. Shoes are just shoes..... As for cutting the lawn, your obsessed :roll:

Posted

I have, over the years, gone overboard on then current interests - stamp collecting, matchbooks, pens, computers, and high heels. I suppose that could be called obsessions, but only the heels could be called a fetish. I am now very aware that I tend to do that, and try to control it.

Posted

If it's not sexual in nature, it's not a fetish. If it takes up an inordinate amount of time, to the point of neglecting other important things in your life, it's an obsession. If it's something you spend a good deal of time on, but it's neither sexual nor neglecting your other responsibilities, it's just a hobby. For me, it's partly a hobby, partly medical - I'm just a better person in heels.

Posted

If it's not sexual in nature, it's not a fetish.

If it takes up an inordinate amount of time, to the point of neglecting other important things in your life, it's an obsession.

If it's something you spend a good deal of time on, but it's neither sexual nor neglecting your other responsibilities, it's just a hobby.

For me, it's partly a hobby, partly medical - I'm just a better person in heels.

I completely agree with you. While I don't know how much better I am from a medical standpoint, I can say that I'm certainly happier, a good sign of mental stability :roll:

Be yourself; everyone else is already taken. - Oscar Wilde

Posted

I never give it a thought if it is a fetish or an obsession. If the grass needs cut---I cut it. That's a necessity. If I wear my heels every day---that's a necessity also. Cheers--- Dawn HH

High Heeled Boots Forever!

Posted

Ask any woman, shoes are a necessity! I prefer to think of my thing for heels as a dedicated interest rather than a fetish, although checking eBay nearly every day for pairs that I like could arguably be counted as obsessive. Chris

Posted

A fetish doesn' have to be sexual if you disregard the freudian sense of the word. Valerie Steele talks about marxist fetishes, meaning that you consume and invest alot of emotion in an object, but don't 'masturbate' to it.

Hi, Trolldeg - long time no see! Glad to see you again.

There's an interesting quote from the editorial review on Amazon: "Because this is Valerie Steele's second book on the topic of fetishistic clothing, her opening statements that she is an outsider to the paraphilias and perversions that she discusses seems a bit hollow."

A paraphilia is "a pattern of recurring sexually arousing mental imagery or behavior that involves unusual and especially socially unacceptable sexual practices." Two examples would be sadism and pedophilia.

One need not climax for something to be a fetish. Any level of sexual arousal associated with the object or behavior is considered a fetish, if that object/behavior is necessary for sexual gratification.

While I don't doubt that Valerie Steele has much more knowledge about fetishes than I do, I'm simply repeated the long-held definition of the word as defined in dictionaries and from medical (psychiatric) sources.

Posted

I have a large collection heels nearly all stilettos & like chris i check ebay everyday, for me it is definatly a fetish but i love it because it makes me happy so who cares not me. As for cutting the lawn i think you might need therapy :roll:

Posted

Sounds like a little fetish, a little obsession and some perfectionist issues. No bad at all IF it kept in limits and doesn’t interfere with other things (and like dr1819 and Trolldeg said). I have struggled with this myself.

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