Hello, Beginner High Heels (Albany NY)

[conor1974]

Hi all, How liberating it is to start my own thread on here. I'm a 36yr old male, married with a high heel fetish from Albany NY. A little about me...Ive always loved seeing women walking in skirts and high heels, i commonly park outside upscale department stores watching them come in and out. This all started about 2 years ago, I decided one day to try on a pair of my wife' heels and enjoyed it so much that everything took off from there. Now, my wife doesn't generally wear heels and most of what she owns, i bought for her. I was wearing them so much that they actually started to wear, so I had to start buying my own. I now have 12 pairs myself!. I wear very high heels, the lowest i have is a 4 inch pump stiletto, up to the largest being a 6.5 inch t-strap slingback. I will upload some pics as soon as i can! I am at the point now though, where enjoyment is now leading to frustration, where I feel i need to "come out" with my fetish and live as free as possible with this. Up to now I have been generally wearing them around the house, I have worn them while driving at night, and have pumped gas in them three times, which has been great. I would dearly love to wear them out on the street in public , but I just don't have the courage yet, I hope I will get that soon, and possibly with the help of the members on here. It seems to me that I would have to dress from head to toe as a female to pull that off, which is difficult, as I have tried that but i just don't have the features of a woman. However I feel that this weekend I made a little progress, I was in bed with my wife, and during sex I asked her if next time I could wear heels? We didnt stop, but she gasped " oh my god, your gay!!", i said no, its just a fetish, she was in disbelief for a few seconds, but then said sure, if you want to. So that brings me to a precipice now, Im going away on a trip thursday, so wednesday night, we should be at that point, and now i dont know what I should do. Walk into the room with a pair of my own on?, ask her again?, wear hers?, I don't know, but i look forward to sharing this with her, and hope it doesn't change her opinion of me. So feel free to share your views with me, help me if you can, I look forward to sharing my adventures on here with you, and hearing about your endeavours too. High Heels Forever! Conor

[hotboots2]

Hi Connor1974, I'm new here too and welcome! As for your dilemma: "what I should do. Walk into the room with a pair of my own on?, ask her again?, wear hers?, I don't know," My opinion is you have already shown you want to wear heels with her in bed while being intimate. The problem is not to overload her with confused emotions, ie she may think, you likes the shoe rather than her, kinky pervert or whatever. I'd maybe try and switch rolls and ask her to wear heels as part of your foreplay. However since you are going on a trip, I presume without your wife, I wouldn't wear heels yourself unless expressly ask too. As you won't be there to discuss your fetish in the next day or so. I have found through experience being away on a trip with your wife you can explore the more "unusual practices" in neutral grounds. I have also found that woman are more accepting of kinky behavior leading up to their menstrual cycle. Don't quote me on that! Now when you return from your trip.......... Good luck.

[conor1974]

Well there is an update, Last night , my wife and I decided to make love and I felt that this was the time, to go for 'the heels'. I asked her again, to solidly define her previous approval, she did say that for me to wear heels was a wierd request. I asked her if it would 'turn her off', she said 'no , go ahead'. So i put on her pink, 3 inch pumps, not the sexiest shoe ever, but a start at least. After we finshed I took them off right away, i guess i felt a little awkward because i didnt like what i was wearing, i would much rather have been in my six inch black pumps and maybe some thigh highs, but that's gonna be a long way down the road. I also did not want to make her feel awkward, god knows what shes really thinking at this point! So this morning I have woke up feeling quite adventurous and feel like a little public fun. I am so going to take baby steps here. I am just going to go to a minimart and pick up a coffee. I have decided to wear jeans and a jacket but with a pink sweater on underneath. i am wearing thigh highs and have decided to go with a pair of my wife's low 3 inch black pumps. By looking at my shoes you would see i'm wearing nylons but not so high in the heel that i would be overly conspicuous. No doubt I'll have to sit in my car for ten minutes before i get the courage to go in, but I'm going to try hard, because i know that every little adventure like this that is successful, i can move on to bigger and better things. I'll let you all know how it goes, Conor '

[Histiletto]

Your wife and you have to really communicate about your desire to wear heels. If she thinks you are not being the man she has been taught to expect, she may reject any more high heeled injections into you marriage. If nothing else, she will be concerned about the public status that will confront her and you. She may not want to put up with the embarrassment society associates with this activity. Reinforce that you really love her as you approach your desire to wear heels. Be truthful in your feelings and background for heeling. I really don't know what she is thinking about your high heel wearing, but it probably isn't in a good light where you and her are concerned, even if she has experienced similar activities through out her life. However, the worst thing you could do is hide your feelings from her, if you are going to be actively heeling.

[j.wexler]

All I can say is take it slow and easy with her. I know the day I told my wife about me was not an easy one but I did tell before we got married. Now she is very supportive of my endeavors but I don't force the issue with her.

[heelman500]

as previously suggested you do have to take it slow with your wife, but as you have already worn them in the marital bed with her, I would say that she will be fine with the whole idea. I noticed that you commented that you believe that you would need to dress in female clothing to go out in heels, this is not totally right. I do on occasions dress up, but this is for fun in social situations but high heels is what I like to wear most! I often go out with heels on instead of male shoes under a pair of jeans, I know that I am wearing them and they are noticeable to the super observant, but as you will pick up from this site, most people that do notice, never say anything to you anyway. I think that the most important thing is to make sure that the whole outfit goes together. e.g a smart shirt, nice jeans and a pair of heels will go together well. anyway good luck and i hope that you get loads of useful advice from the forum.

[dblair]

Hey Conor1974, I have enjoyed reading your posts. I'm not sure if I agree with your methods, but I love your determination And, as heelman said, you definitely do not need to dress entirely in woman's clothing to wear heels in public, but it does take some time and consideration in order to figure out what "men's" clothing will work. Also, some heels will incorporate much easier into a male look than others...you'll figure it out

[UpBy5]

Conor1974, From what you've said, I assume you would prefer (in public) to be less conspicuous. What's worked for me are black leather (not patent) 4" wedges with jeans or dark slacks. Without the separate high heel, its barely noticable that they're heels. I had been wearing these exclusively, regularly to have it become "normal" to me. Nothing special, nothing risky. I've been noticed a couple of times, but no comments made. 95% no one notices. Just fooling myself, but it helps to not feel strange. If your psychology works like mine, as it becomes routine, you don't think about it after a while, like wearing eyeglasses. I usually wear heels around the house for an hour or so before going out; it brings on that "routine" feel. It got me closer to going out in more "in your face" (for men) styles. I always have a pair of regular loafers in the car floor, should something...unexpected...happen. Even less conspicuous are cowboy boots with 4+" heels. Definitely "guy" type shoes, but you seem to already past that point. Hope this may help with the nervous feel in public. It DOES feel good out there! Happy heeling, wherever, whenever! UpBy5

[conor1974]

Thanks so much to everyone who has replied to my posts, I really appreciate the words of advice and helps me to feel at home here!

[conor1974]

Hi all, Just wanted to share another positive experience from today, Well i'm definitely becoming more comfortable with this, and hopefully other readers will take comfort and confidence from my posting. Visited a store called 'Burlington Coat Factory' in Albany today, which has a great selection of very high heels!. I bought a pair of black 5.5 inch slingback closed toe, platform pumps. I tried them on right in the store and the female sales associate, stopped over with a smile and told me they looked great on me!. I paid for the shoes and immediately took my boots off and put them on. I walked right through the shopping mall to my car. I got lots of looks and even lots of smiles. One older woman complimented me, and asked where I bought my heels as they looked fabulous. I honestly felt so uplifted, and happy that i'm gradually and slowly able to be this true to myself. For anyone reading this that feels 'on the edge', take that extra step when you can, you might really enjoy it! Conor:smile: