hhboots

Similar to Steve, I upload from the phone to a computer first, then things are much easier for me to post online.  I know most sites are intended for you to upload directly from phone to a website, but I just feel more comfortable and feel I have more control of things when using a computer vs phone.  I guess I am one of those rare people, as I know tons of people that do almost everything from their phone.  I guess I just feel a bit limited with what I prefer to do with a phone (even though I have a nice large screen) and posting to a forum from the phone is one of those things I don't really enjoy that much, reading websites on a phone is cool, but otherwise, nah . . .   Sorry, I'm probably not helping you much either     

Freestyle, I really like most of your styles photos there.  The fur was a bit much for my tastes, but really nice outfits overall.

@MackyHeels - I know you were not too happy with most of the feedback over your Givenchy heels.  I mean if you have that kind of money to burn and you like them, then go for it, but you asked for opinions and you got that.  You have to admit realistically they are a bit odd looking... and for that price, it just didn't make sense to most of the people around here.

Your next comment said they are good for a guy that is shy about wearing heels in public.  Honestly, if that is the case, a guy is much better off starting out with a 3 to 4.5" chunky or block heel boot with a round toe.  Yes, they are a bit less exciting than a 5"+ spike heel pump, etc, but I recommend wearing those type of boots for a while out until a guy is comfortable in public, then decide if they want to take it up a notch so to speak. 

Chunky boots are always my fallback choice and are super easy to wear out with confidence and with virtually no one ever looks at them funny, and when I do feel more adventurous, I sometimes wear something a bit more exciting.  Anyway, not trying to say anything snide or anything, just trying to help.  Cheers.

I was about to ask the size, but I see one of the photos tells me its a UK 9/Euro 43, which I think is equal to a US 11.  Unfortunately, I wear a US 10.  Ahh well, I own already own some that look very similar, no biggie 

That is wonderful that you have been able to open up with your sister, it is an excellent first step.

I would be somewhat wary/cautious of the 'seeing a counselor' scenario.  I am personally not a big fan of them, but if you have a good counselor they can help you feel better about yourself and it will feel good to get things you have kept bottled up off your chest in an open dialogue, but a bad counselor will probably make a failed attempt to try to 'fix' you.  There is nothing to fix except that you do need to feel happy about who you are and understand there is really nothing wrong with how you feel. 

I think everyone has gone through some of this confusion you are having, in one way or another.  Having a strong desire to do something strictly driven by hormones, and then feeling guilt after, asking yourself "why am I doing this?"  It's fine, it's how we are wired.  We are all very different, but we all have a very common set of programming within us that makes us sometimes do things that make little sense. 

As for your parents, I think the other guys are right in that you should probably talk to your mom next.  She is likely to be the most understanding and will always want to protect you no matter what.  Of course I don't know your dad, but I know some dads can have very harsh initial reactions to this type of news, so you may want to save that conversation for later if you think that is the case.  Anyway, keep strong and let us know how things progress.

...  I am just so nervous to tell my parents the only one I fell a little less nervous about telling is my older sister but I still have to have enough confidence to tell her.

 

Anyway just to let you know I am 100% into girls I am not gay in anyway actually I like girls so much that I have a lot of thoughts about being a girl myself and at the same time falling in love with one. I guess if I was born a girl I would be considered a lesbian. 

... If I was not so nervous about this any more I would go all out and dress fully like a girl but right now I need to have the confidence to wear my shoes in public first before I even go that far. Maybe telling someone and then my family is what I need to do. ...

For telling the family - perhaps just start with talking to the sister (the one you feel most comfortable telling) and she can help you work on this with the rest of the family.  Telling someone you are close to is probably the best thing you can do at this point for many reasons.

On heeling out in public - the way I started, was by wearing less obvious boots and similar type wedge shoes, etc, and not too high either.  They may not exactly be the shoes you prefer the most, but they will attract a lot less attention than say peep toe stilettos or strappy sandals, etc.  Get yourself comfortable with doing that first before going any further, then see if you want to try the shoes you like in public.

As for cross dressing -  you would be surprised at the number of men that do that privately, far more than any one is willing to admit.  You don't have to feel like you need to take this any further than that, like going out publicly fully cross-dressed, unless that is really what you want to do.  Just get comfortable with experimenting with it on your own if you choose to.  Just because you like to wear heels and perhaps want to do that in public, does not mean you have to go any further with the rest of it in public, but that is totally up to you.  Everyone is different in that regard, so don't feel pressured to do anything you are not comfortable with, including heeling in public.   You can just keep all of it as a personal 'at home' sort of thing if that is what you want to do.

I have had similar thoughts cross my mind early in my life as you described above, regarding your desires to be more like a girl, etc, as I am sure many cross dressers, and those further on the trans-spectrum have had.  You just need to discover for yourself where you feel most comfortable.  I eventually ended up with the decision that I am happy with who I am, and I am a married man that wears heels about 50-60% of the time, with an occasional desire to cross-dress (at home only), and that's that...

Take it slowly and as others have said, be honest with your family.  Again, I do suggest starting with your sister, then seek her advice on how to proceed with the parents. Best of luck and keep us posted.  Your story is very interesting and I think many of us want to know how things turn out for you.  

Congrats on the new boots and new shoes BTBAI.  Both very nice choices.

Anyway, take it easy while living under your parents roof.  Especially with your parents... it doesn't sound like they will be easy to convince that it is ok to live life a little differently than what they think is normal.  Be patient, and just take things slowly.  Good luck!

hmm, another one of these threads... 

yeah, I mean I could almost try to guess at what your saying (I know you speak French and try to do English the best you can), but sorry its just not coming to me   

Well yes but strictly speaking the competition is supposed to be for guys.

Well, its one of those "gender: not telling"  but yeah, pretty sure thats a guy 

:-)          IMG_2237.jpg

Oh my Miss Amanda - - I do believe we have our work cut out for us.  :-))

Oh my... very, very nice indeed.  :-)  Thank you for sharing... and for putting us back in our places   LOL

Told another female friend about my heel fetish, she told me she has a lot of high heels, and will wear them with me when we go out and I wear my heels. Wanna see if she would be up for me filming her shoes when she walks. She's pretty chill about it too.

Sounds cool, however, the last part of your comment sounds borderline creepy.  Hoping you have a good relationship with her and she is fully on board with it.  If you ask a casual friend to 'film her shoes when she walks', that would creep the hell of out of most women,  so yea, as heels2u said "tread lightly and go slow".    Good luck.

First I have to ask how are you dressing.  If you are wearing 4 inch spike boots with your pants tucked in, then yea I can see their point. Or if you are wearing hi heel sandals and your toes are painted, you have to expect that reaction.  I wear heels every day. All some sort of boot. So the majority don't look too feminine... I try my best not to put other people in a situation that would make them uncomfortable... I wear boots with jeans that cover the heel.  I have some shoes that draw more attention, like what I have had on all week, so I try not to wear them depending on the situation.  I went to my daughter's horse show for college. I did not wear heels because I was around her friends all day. Now I have worn heels around her and out with her to other places.  Don't be surprised when people act embarrassed or freaked out around you. "We" are unusual. If I saw myself I would probably point and whisper to my wife, look at that.  Choose your footwear to the people you are going to be around.

This response from heels2u is spot on for my situation and how I feel.  I tend to wear more moderate boots and shoes and I am not very blatant about my heeling most of the time.  For work especially, I wear usually 2"-3.5" inch chunky heels and wedges that are rather stealthy to the casual observer.  I do the same if I am around any of my kids' friends.  I definitely do not want to embarrass my kids to their friends (as we all know how mean kids can be to each other).

When I am out on my own or with my wife, I do usually choose higher and more fem looking shoes, but I still would never wear brightly colored patent stilettos or anything even close to a strappy platform hooker shoe when I go out.  But I absolutely agree with heels2u, I often choose to tone down footwear based on where I will be, or who I will be with.

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Back to the original question:  My wife, my kids, and my siblings know, as well as some very select friends.  Most of them don't say much about it. I've had a few interesting questions over the years that are sometimes hard to answer.  My eldest sister does tease a little, but she has always been that way no matter what the topic is, its just her personality and I don't take offense to it.

Didn't see this thread until just now and have not taken any recent pictures...  Anyway, I got these from an archived thread I posted several years ago.  My legs have not changed much since then, so these should still work 

I think being paid for maternity leave depends on what country you live in.  Here in the UK women get 3 months off paid.

Depends on the company as well.  My company gives women up to 3 months paid maternity leave, plus an extra 2 months bonding leave.  Men in my company can also get 2 months bonding leave.

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Back to the original topic, yes, I have always had very feminine legs and grow relatively little hair, I sometimes remove what hair I do have on my legs.  I've posted several pictures here in past threads, so I won't bother doing it again    Anyway, since I have such feminine legs, might as well treat them as such, that's what I always say.

I flipped your picture (for those that did not feel like standing on their heads to see them) 

I do like those sling backs and glad you got to dig them out of the closet for a while anyway.  I do know what you mean, I am sure many of us own some pairs that we would love to wear anytime and anywhere, but just can't (for various reasons).

As others have said, I like them as well.  I own a several pairs of boots that look similar.  So, if you really aren't sure why you bought them, and if they are size 10, I'll take them off your hands (or feet in this case).

... She agreed and bought me a few different pairs and thats when the light bulb went off for her.  She liked it and reailzed it wasnt so bad for me to dress up. ...

Congratulations on the breakthrough with your wife.  It is very nice to have an understanding wife.  This sort of thing can be very difficult for your mate to deal with and can definitely be a strain on the relationship.  I've been there myself a few times over the years.

In my case, it has been easy to get carried away once I felt I got a green light from her, only to find out later that it was more of a yellow light.  For her, it was probably closer to a 'tolerance' than what I had thought was full-on 'acceptance'.  Also, my wife seems happier when I try to include her whenever possible rather than doing too much on my own, if that makes any sense.  

Anyway, as Histiletto mentioned, remember to put her first before your other passion.  Best of luck, and I hope you are able to continue in a manner that makes you both happy.  

Also, I agree with others, nice boot collection you have going there

Yeah, you are going to have to figure out for yourself if you are going to enjoy that childhood dream or continue treating it like an investment.

I mean if it was me, I am not that much into classic cars, mainly because I am not too much into having to constantly work on it (or paying someone to work on it).  I much prefer to buy a nice newer car, enjoy it, and not having to worry about it breaking down... or in your case, taking extra special care of it and being afraid to have it damaged, or stolen, or putting miles on it, etc. 

But that is just me.  I know many people love the classic cars, and that car you have is really pretty.  There were Porsche's on my childhood dream list, too.  

wow, that has to be the first time I have seen an article you would normally see toward heels, that is aimed at flats... Although, the reasons given in this article are pretty much just as stupid as the reasons given for heels being bad, some even overlap (such as ill fitting shoes), which is obvious for any shoe type and is hardly a logical reason to apply it to an entire class of shoe.  The whole article is silly, just like almost any Yahoo posted article, but I also get sucked into reading them from time to time 

Watts

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Pebbles, not sure you if you realized, but both of your posts were replying to some rather old posts, in fact some of them were made as long as 5 years ago by people that have not been here in ages.

Sorry to see him go.  He definitely put a lot of thought and care into his posts, some of which were mind numbingly long    I can only assume its loosely related to the fallout from a recent... um, never mind...  Anyway, he's definitely a top contributor here and will be missed.

Haha... Yeah, I am pretty sure my method of calculating that was not entirely correct, buy the main point is still valid in that we are such a miniscule number that go out in public in heels in comparison to the total population. But I still have a hard time grasping that in San Francisco of all places that our SF is all alone there as a public heeler...

Oxford…  Yes, I wonder the same thing.  I have never seen another guy in gals shoes - heels, flats - nothing.  I guess I am the only one out here.  

The folks in the shoe stores tell me that "a lot" of guys come in to look at, try on, and purchase gals shoes / sandals.  Then they must disappear into the firmament.  

But I keep looking, maybe , just maybe - some day….   Take care…  sf

SF, I am absolutely amazed that you live in or near San Francisco and have not seen a guy in heels.  That sort of just blows my mind...

I live in the pacific northwest and have seen a couple of other guys in heels with regular guys clothing in the past few years. One was a guy in shorts and ~2.5" heel mule/sandal just walking around downtown, and another was a goth/biker platform chunky mid-heel boot at a rock concert.  Anyway, I think even though we have quite a few active members, I would guess in my time here, I have read comments from about 200-250 guys on this forum that claim to wear heels out in public regularly, out of that number I would say about half of those are in the United States, so 100-125.  Lets assume for argument sake, they are all telling the truth, but even if say only 75% of them are telling the truth, I would think there are some guys that do wear heels in public that do not even know about this website, which would balance that number out anyway, so I am sticking with that estimate. 

So even with that, there are about 320 million people total in the US, and 100 million of those are adult males.  That means, on a daily basis, your chances of seeing a male in heels are 100 out of 100 million, or that equates to 1 in a million.  I am sure my numbers/stats are probably a bit off, but you get my point.  Also, in some large 'cosmopolitan' cities like LA, NYC, London, Paris, I would think the chances are a slightly higher than the overall average, but still very low in the grand scheme of things, I would think San Fran would be a bit higher as well, but apparently not.  Maybe in the night club scene in S.F. you might have a better chance of seeing it?  *shrug*. 

Even though I do significant outings myself about 3-4 days of the week, I still am not blatant about it.  I mean I am nowhere near where JeffB or some others are. So, I think 99% of the people I pass by, don't even notice what I am doing.  So your chances of seeing someone as obvious as JeffB (and those on par with him) are probably at least 1 in 5 million or worse.

Anyway, we hear daily about guys wearing heels on this forum, but our numbers here in the grand scheme of things is still so very miniscule, so that would make it extremely unlikely that you will see another guy in heels.  I would think about as likely as winning $1000 or more in the lottery.

I am not sure this has ever been asked on here.

i'm curious.

Feel free to duck this question, or answer honestly.

I will do the same if pushed....

In response to the original post, I would say, yes, it has to a limited degree, but not too bad really.  My wife is very accepting of what I do.  I know she sometimes feels a little uncomfortable when we go out together, especially if we go to a place where we might run into people we know.  Even at home, I need to just not go overboard about it.  So I definitely limit the activity for her sake, I really don't want mess up a good thing.  But yes, there has been some clashes between us, in the sense that I am reminded that she should always come first before my obsession, and I have occasionally slipped up and forget that.  Otherwise, its been a fairly harmonious relationship with my wife as long as I remember to not get carried away with it.

So geezyweezy, you posted the question, but have not answered it yourself.  It's your turn...  lol