SleekHeels

I can relate to your feelings of desiring a pair of heels and the excitement of finding them and slipping into them for the first time. It reminded me a lot of many happy heel buying experiences of my own over the years, so thanks for that. I'm glad they lived up to the anticipation and were a perfect fit, and like Shafted I can only marvel at how thin those heels are.

I feel a poll coming on: http://hhplace.org/topic/22745-excitement-of-new-and-old-heels/

How quickly does the excitement of a new pair of heels fade away for you?

For me it's quite slowly, and while I love that new shoes feeling it's almost just as exciting to rediscover old favourites in my collection, maybe by wearing them with a new outfit for a different look. However, I think in the early days when my collection was much smaller, the novelty of each new pair of shoes was a lot stronger because I usually had nothing else like that in my collection.

I don't have a heel spur so I haven't experienced exactly what you describe. I wasn't sure exactly what a heel spur is so I had to look it up, and in doing so I came across this slideshow: http://www.webmd.com/pain-management/ss/slideshow-worst-shoes-for-your-feet

I do have a bit of what they call the "pump hump" on slide 2/26 but ironically it's mens shoes that have caused this for me, occasionally tight-fitting or poorly made ballet flats might aggravate it a little so I try to choose good ones, but wearing heels certainly doesn't seem to aggravate the situation and actually does feel like it provides some relief, as you describe for your heel spur.

In general I know the advice in the slideshow is very anti-heels, which is quite typical, but I think it's good to have an awareness of the potential issues and make an informed choice on good footcare so we can minimise some of the complications and maximise our enjoyment of wearing heels. Many of the problems seem to arise from badly-fitting shoes which in my experience can often be flats (or mens shoes) just as much if not even more so than high heels.

In your case I'm glad that you've found some relief from your heel spur, but maybe take care so that the extra pressure on the front of your foot doesn't give you problems there. Having said that, the boots in your avatar look a pretty comfortable choice.

However, being that several family members were attending (some being very closed-minded and judgmental), I decided that it would not be in my best interest to wear the heels that night.  Instead, I asked if I could wear them on our next date night, and she agreed!    

 

I'm a happy guy right now!

I think your restraint was exactly the right thing to do in that situation.

I hope you reap the rewards and you both have a fantastic next date!

Larry, I'll echo everyone else's encouragement, you certainly didn't handle any of those situations wrong. I had plenty of "tail between my legs" (or as mlroseplant says "wind out of my sails") moments early on in my heeling. I think with those early adventures it's natural to feel anxiety, and that makes us hypersensitive to people's reactions. Whether it's the kid with the phone, the teenage girls or the guy in the car, what they did was only an expression of their narrow-minds and lack of manners, it in no way makes less of a decent person of you. In time you learn to just brush off reactions like that and think nothing of it, so while it's natural to feel that your confidence has taken a bit of a knock, you'll bounce back stronger. The bad reactions fall away, the good reactions stick.

Those are really nice wedges by the way, and as you described them they must've looked great with the jeans.

You grabbed yourself a bargain there. I agree with 4608 they're not overly pointy at all, the texture of the gold is lovely (not too shiny, not too matt) and the cut of the upper is very flattering to your feet. They'd add a nice sparkle to a black dress or skirt/top combination with a not-too-bright blazer, and given your past outfits perhaps a bolder tie with some gold accents to link with the shoes.

At first glance the wedges seem almost too casual (like slippers!), but with smart tailoring I agree they'd really suit the "casual business" look you have in mind. Maybe you can match with the darker colour in the plaid pattern for the trousers and the lighter colour in the plaid for a top, perhaps a little tricky to combine with your favoured bright colours but maybe you could sneak a splash of red in there somewhere (if the plaid pattern is a true grey, or perhaps orange/yellow if its more of a brown-grey, it's hard to tell from photos).

In fact, these are just the completion of a full outfit. I saw an ad for a shiny puffer coat, went to the store, didn't like it, searched online and went for the original in a shorter jacket version. While looking for a nice winter skirt, I saw the skirt in the exact same design and thought that this might make a cool outfit. After I got the skirt, I thought that there might also be boots out there... and I found them in a boutique in London. All items are from Moncler.

That's a fun winter outfit. Personally I prefer the contrast of textures with the skirt on the left. Presumably you'll be wearing some patterened tights to complete the outfit. I'm sure you'll turn a few heads but in a nice way, it's a really well put together look.

Nice look Jeff. I'm surprised you got so few reactions, whenever I've worn red shoes they've tended to get noticeably more glances, mostly positive ones from women who presumably have an understanding of "the red shoe effect". Your experience seems to somewhat disprove the existence of such an effect. I thought there was a thread a few months ago that there is indeed something special about red shoes, but I can't seem to find it now.

It's somewhat of a paradox that the more we nail an overall look, the less of a reaction it seems to evoke. It would be nice to get some smiles or even compliments, but that just insipres me to be more complimentary when I see others whose outfit I like. I was in the supermarket the other day (wearing my black suede courts with bootcut jeans and black waterfall cardigan) and saw a young lady wearing a camel leather jacket, blue skinny jeans and a wonderful pair of stilleto heeled black suede just over-the-knee boots. Without hesitation I smiled and said "I love your boots, you look gorgeous!" and she smiled back and thanked me.

I think the outfits we wear do have an effect on how others receive compliments that we give, and Jeff I'm sure with your outfits any compliments you give would be received in the very positive spirit they're intended. Maybe this is the antidote what TBG described as "the frustration of getting all dressed up and having no body notice".

There seem to be lots of floral pencil skirts around for this season after last year's Aztec/geometric theme (which I also really liked). I think some of the more traditional looking florals can look a bit dated but there are some really nice modern-looking prints too. That's what I liked about this one, the way the print has been broken up vertically gives it a contemporary edge and a very flattering effect with the long pencil-skirt shape. And most importantly, the look works with elegant heels.

Good luck finding one you like Jeff, I'll look forward to seeing what you come up with.

Not sure, just never quite me. Only pair I ever got I wanted to wear only on carpet just in case.

Better luck finding some heels you really like Rockpup. It seems to go in waves, sometimes I don't see any styles that really excite me in the shops, but then all of a sudden several really desirable styles appear. It's still great that you tried them, even though it didn't work out this time.

Do you still wear your stiletto loafers out much?   Loafers are essentially a male shoe and, heel or not, seem to me the ideal freestyle footwear, even with a small platform - but not easy to find, especially in large sizes.

I've not worn my stiletto loafers for a while now, but they're a great autumn/winter style and they'll definitely be making a few appearances. The only downside with them is that something with the loafer styling seems to create a slight bump inside the shoe that's given me a corn on the top of one of my toes, so when I do wear them I use a plaster so as not to aggravate it. At least the plaster isn't visible!

I'm not overly enthused with the current range of high-heeled loafers available, most of them have quite a blocky medium height heel that looks a bit frumpy but that seems to be trending lately.

New skirt from Dorothy Perkins (they're doing a 25% off promotion for the next week for London Fashion week):

http://www.dorothyperkins.com/en/dpuk/product/clothing-203535/skirts-203567/broken-rose-print-pencil-skirt-3412552?bi=1&ps=20

Lots of shoe possibilities (though I don't think the shoes worn by the model in the photo are the most flattering combination with the skirt). I'm thinking classic black patent courts are the most obvious choice, black suede peeptoe courts, black or white strappy sandals with pink nail polish, or for colder winter days some sharp-looking stiletto-heeled black knee boots.

No problem with the polished floors, but the soles of the shoes did have indentation stripes from new and I'd walked a short distance on a concrete surface beforehand that probably made the soles a little rougher and more grippy.

I actually wore the green version of the shoes, which is the colour I'd originally wanted and finally found:

I wore them with a matching green tshirt, black skinny jeans, denim jacket and black shoulder bag. I got plenty of double-takes, some more discreet than others. A few times teenage girls in pairs would glance at me and then each other. I think it's nice that they don't feel they have to inhibit their surprise, and for all I know they could just as easily be thinking "cool" rather than "weird", there's no need to presume rudeness. I occasionally caught their reflections in a store window as they passed and they were definitely turning around to take another look. That's fine with me, it's not like I wear my heels to be invisible so it's nice to be noticed. A couple of times I exchanged smiles with young ladies (maybe in their 20's), I think they're the ones who enjoy fashion and heels the most. As I entered one store a middle-aged lady who was leaving glanced at my heels and said "you're doing well in those" and a smiled and thanked her. In another store I used the changing rooms to try on a skirt and the sales assistant went out of her way to make me feel welcome and comfortable, and I really appreciated that (and yes, I did buy the skirt, I liked how it looked and it was 25% off).

Wearing new shoes for the first time certainly has an edge over wearing old shoes. Maybe it gives a boost of self-confidence that projects positively and evokes more reactions, or maybe they just give a heightened awareness of the reactions around us.

shoes as dynamic as those demand to be fully seen, and that calls for a skirt, maybe a skirted business suit as I've seen women downtown sport similar shoes during the workday, though with not quite so high a heel. Good luck with your new purchase.

That reminds me of a skirt suit I have, black with a sandstone pinstripe, which could work well with the heels, thanks for that

I wore the new heels today and ended up walking quite a distance in a large shopping mall. I've ended up with a couple of blisters under my toes. That's partly because the shoes fit just a little too tight, also because I did far too much walking and not enough sitting. On the plus side the shoes don't show any signs of damage where my toes were rubbing (the coloured part at the front that isn't covered by the insole). Maybe this is because the shoes are real leather whereas synthetic suedette can often damage a lot easier like that. The heels also have an elastic strap on the slingback but it looks fairly strurdy so with care it should last. I've had some far more fragile elastic straps that have barely lasted more than a few wearings on cheaper shoes so I tend to avoid buying slingbacks with elastic straps like that.

Anyway, after a first proper wearing of my new heels I'd rate the quality of the shoes/materials as pretty good.

Very nice, SH! Any ideas as what to wear with those shoes?

Well, in terms of trousers ( stay with me Jeff !) I think they look good with skinny jeans and a white shirt and brown biker jacket, and I also have a pair of brown tailored trousers that I think would work well with a white shirt under a sandstone blazer.

As for skirts, when I tried the shoes on in store I was wearing the floral skirt I posted about a few days ago and the combination looked "ok" but not quite right. I'm thinking maybe my dark brown bodycon skirt and brown tshirt with a sandstone waterfall cardigan. It's quite casual but the heels would add a sharpness to it.

In any case I think I'd only wear these heels with bare legs (or at the very most maybe very sheer tights) so if these shoes do make an appearance over the winter it'll most likely be indoors and with trousers.

I was browsing the sale in an Office store and found these peeptoe slingbacks:

I tried my size (UK7) in store. I was expecting that they'd fit too tight (and the next size up is usually too big) so I was pleasantly surprised that they fit a little snug but felt wearable and I really liked how they looked in the mirror so I bought them. The staff were very helpful and friendly throughout, and a customer who was sitting next to me when I tried them on said they looked gorgeous, which was really nice of her. If you make a little effort to smile, be polite and make people feel comfortable about seeing a guy wearing heels, they really can be very positive.

Anyway they still have them listed on the website in sizes UK 7 and 8:

http://www.office.co.uk/view/product/office_catalog/2,37/1330886265

and they have several other styles in a size UK 8 and even a few in a UK 9.

You've pulled that look of very nicely Jeff, it's a very coherent overall appearance, you project a lot of comfort wearing it, and it's great to see you enjoying "proper" heels again. The necklace is a really nice touch, it completes the look without overpowering it at all.

I guess you could also go for a minimalist option without the belt and it'd look like a plain black dress, or alternatively go for a wider belt that's more of a feature, perhaps something like this:

http://www.amazon.com/Ladies-Three-Braided-Leather-Medium/dp/B002NWI51O/ref=sr_1_4?ie=UTF8&qid=1413749792&sr=8-4&keywords=wide+black+belt+braided

Also a simple belt and heels in a brighter colour, like silver or red, would also make for a more contrasting option.

None of these are criticisms at all, just ideas that spring to mind.

Very nice, SH! Very nice indeed! All three outfits look like something I'd wear, in a New York minute! Your pictures describe to perfection why wearing skirts and heels (or flats) are so much fun!

Well Jeff, having incorporated skirts into your freestyle fashion so effectively, your enthusiastic reaction is encouraging and very much appreciated.

Wow, I like those, they're have quite a bold and distinctive styling without looking like they're trying too hard. They'd look great with the motorbike in your avatar picture, will you be riding in them? Great find, enjoy

Thanks for sharing, I've not come across that trick before either. What kind of socks are you wearing with these boots? Presumably you've managed to get out of yours after putting them on with the plastic bag trick.... or have you?

I once had a pair of pull-on knee boots that were very difficult to put on, I could only wear them with sheer hosiery. Once I'd got them on they fit just fine, not too tight at all. Like you say, getting out of them can be a bit of a struggle too. I don't have those boots any more, they were quite a cheap synthetic material that stretched out so much around the ankle area from all the pulling on and off, they just didn't look right any more. I have other pairs of pull-on heeled knee boots that are easier to put on and hold their shape better. The only pair I struggle with are a pair of flats, which is a shame because I'd like to wear them with slightly thicker socks and/or insoles for warmth and comfort. The trouble is that, with any boots or shoes, buying the next size up they are just he wrong size (too long) and don't support the foot properly.

Welcome Pichonkun. Did you get any reactions when you wore your heels shopping and to comic con? How was the experience for you, did you find it nerve-wracking? Thrilling? Liberating? Will you wear your heels out again?

Well done for getting out there after such a long time, and to your supportive wife too. Very cool boots, and overall the look flows from top to bottom and looks very consistent and natural, which perhaps explains why you seemed to blend in so easily in your surroundings. It's great that you feel good about it, all the best for your future outings.

Please no more on this matter, or I'll just lock this thread.

But we can still discuss flip-flops, right? I would so enjoy wearing these.

http://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/NEW-LADIES-TOE-POST-SUMMER-HOLIDAY-DIAMANTE-WEDGE-FLIP-FLOP-SANDALS-UK-3-8-/191284732299?pt=UK_Women_s_Shoes&var=490402264245&hash=item2c8975618b

Thanks Puffer, I had indeed misunderstood, the penny's dropped now and that's a very nice compliment so thank you very much for that.

You say that your parents know you like to 'dress up'.   Do you mean that they know you deliberately dress in women's clothes of an overtly feminine nature, as distinct from merely liking more flamboyant male or unisex clothing?

I've occasionally worn "menswear from the womens department" in quite a subtle way and I don't think they even noticed. But they do know I like to wear heels and other more obvious womenswear and that crosses a line that they just can't deal with. I've spoken honestly and openly to them about it but they choose to stick their heads in the sand. I've done what I can but compromise is a two-way street and, like I said before, there are more positive things to put my energy into. It's not exactly ideal but there is no secret key to total acceptance, everyone just needs to find a balance they can move forwards with.

______

Today I popped out at lunchtime wearing my black suede courts (5" heel, 1" platform) with bootcut jeans and blue "heart" tshirt under a black waterfall cardigan. Here are photos including a close-up of the shoes.

First I walked along a short section of the high street, crossing at a busy road junction. I popped into a drug store to buy some body lotion that was on sale, the sales assistants are usually young women but today they were young men, the guy who served me was totally unflustered by how I was dressed and treated me very politely and just like any other customer. I then walked back along the high street and bought some food items from the supermarket. As I walked purposefully along the aisles a few other customers gave me slight glances, but there was no negative feeling whatsover.

By the way I'm not making my posts on some vanity trip, I'm really just hoping that perhaps some hesitant newbies might think "hey, I could wear something like that" and be inspired to overcome their fears, just like other established forum members inspire me too. It would be great to read more newbie success stories.

Nice photos TBG. Most people would see a contrast between male and female but, having become accustomed to your bold outfits, I saw more of a contrast between quite an urban fashion style and rural surroundings. I guess I'm saying that even if a woman wore that outfit in those surroundings she'd turn a few heads, so sometimes it can be just a boldness thing and not a gender thing at all.

Thanks all !

Puffer you're right I don't show my face (it's just a general internet identity thing, I wouldn't include my face if I was wearing regular menswear) but even though I'm always clean-shaven and occasionally wear a little mascara and lipstick, I don't make any attempt to conceal that I'm male (nor to conceal my enthusiasm for "femininity"). I'm not sure that onlookers are "wholly admiring and accepting" because they like what they see, I think most people feel a little uncomfortable seeing something that goes against their social conditioning but they're politely accepting out of political correctness. Having said that a few people who dare to take the blinkers off and have a genuine sense of fun with fashion (usually women) smile or even give a compliment (and know how to receive a compliment too) and that's really nice.

Your question isn't intrusive. I'm a self-employed computer engineer, mostly working from home but also in communal/public places. I used to wear my heels only at home, and although I still do sometimes for the fun of it, these days I often wear flats at home and save my heels for when I'm out and about. If I'm going to client sites I tend to wear a regular mens suit and shoes, but if I'm meeting a client in a public place (like a busy cafe) I'll often wear a shirt, vneck jumper, bootcut jeans (basically menswear from the womens department) and ankle boots, usually flats but occasionally with heels and it's never even been noticed as far as I can tell. That's the same if I'm going to an industry event. I save the skirts/dresses and prettier heels for when I'm just working by myself in a public place like a cafe or business centre where I'm fairly anonymous, or recreational time i.e. going to the mall for some window shopping or a concert. When I visit my parents I revert to regular menswear; they know I like to dress up but it fiercely upsets them and I have better things to put my energy into than bashing my head against that brick wall. In general I think it's easier to blend fashion freedom into the anonymity of an urban environment, and for those living in more rural surroundings maybe a day-trip to a big town is a more feasible option. I think autumn/winter is an easier time to blend menswear/womenswear with jumpers, jeans and boots, so perhaps that's an easier time for those wanting to step out for the first time.