SleekHeels

Thanks for your comments guys. Here are some close-ups of the zebra peep-toes:

The nail colour is Revlon's "One Perfect Coral", very close to fuchsia but slightly more orange.

This looks like a very similar style from the same brand:

http://www.sanmarina.fr/femme/chaussures-printemps-ete/sandales/sandales-gaufrier#article=21286

They're only listed up to a size EU40, depending if you're a small EU41 and they're a large EU40 they could maybe just about fit.

FYI when a shoe brand sounds French/Italian/Spanish/Brazilian, in your web search you can try adding the corresponding word for shoes in that language, chaussures/scarpe/zapatos/sapatos. That's how I found the above.

Acquaint

I agree, I'm quite aware of my relative lack of hips, but I try to do a little exercise to define what waist I can. I usually buy skirts/trousers a size smaller than tops and that seems to work fine for me. I think there's a lot more variety in womenswear in general, so in fact most women will find they can only wear a fraction of the diversity of styles on offer. In any case, you seem to be finding looks that work for you Lime15, your outfit's very smart and I can't imagine it working with flats (except maybe ballet flats), it's all about the heels and you present them very well.

I often think back to the feelings of despair and low self-esteem that many of us grapple with before we come to terms with our passion for heels. It's a shame that something as trivial as fashion preferences can overwhelm some people, and narrow-minded people expressing their prejudice shouldn't be the only voice they hear. That's why this forum is so important and why I continue to make the effort to contribute, inspired by others who do the same whether they're founding members or enthusiastic newbies, and hoping that it gives troubled readers a more balanced and hopeful perspective. We just like beautiful shoes, that's all.

My latest adventure was to a shopping mall for a coffee and a bit of heel browing that turned into buying. I wore my zebra peep-toe courts, stonewash skinny jeans and black fluffy knit jumper (the weather's not been very summery this week).

I think I heard one young woman mumble "weirdo" as she rushed by, a couple of very pretty young women glanced at me and gave a slight giggle before getting back to their conversation, but most people just ignored me. I exchanged smiles with a couple of young-middle-aged women, and had really positive chat with the sales assistant when I was trying on shoes.

Earlier in the week I went to the supermarket. I wore my black suedette wedge sandals with dark blue bootcut jeans and a bright orange vest under a black waterfall cardigan. The lady at the checkout seemed to be friendly and chatty with all the customers and was no different with me.

The same wedges are more visible with the aztec print dress and demin jacket that I wore last week, which made a sunny day much more enjoyable. My feeling was that most people ignored me a little more intensely than usual (if that makes sense), but the ones who smiled did so very warmly, and the cafe staff were very friendly.

I hope this inspires newbies to feel free to wear what they like.

maninpumps, I really like both those wedges, great choices by you and your wife.

hiheellover23, the platform on those blue heels is too extreme for me, but they look fun and you do have a habit of making even the most outrageous styles work for you.

Now for my latest purchase. I only went in to browse, I had no intention of buying anything!

They have a 5½" heel and 1½" platform, from New Look.

http://www.newlook.com/shop/shoe-gallery/view-all-shoes/-white-cut-out-mesh-panel-open-toe-platform-sandals_307848810

Should that be "how to walk in 6" heels that have a 1" platform"? Hehe

I totally agree that without a platform, walking in 6" heels is much more challenging (or even impossible).

But I would also add that walking in 6" heels with say a 2" platform is trickier than 4" heels with no platform, because the underneath of the platform tends to curve up at the front, therefore ( a ) in a standing position less of the sole is in contact with the ground so there's more weight on the ball of the foot, and ( b ) when walking they tend to roll you onto your toes and propel you forward.

To a newbie I'd recommend to learn to walk in 4" single-sole heels before trying 5" heels with a 1" platform, 6" heels with a 2" platform, etc. This way the ankle "learns" what a 4" rise feels like before tackling the platform aspect.

There's a video-clip called 'How To Walk In 6" Heels' (links recently posted by mtnsofheels and BobHH, http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yq6KjCHKj8Q ), and a couple of the comments suggest that the presenter in the video is wearing the wrong size of heels because her toes are overhanging the front of the sandals.

However, it seems to me like she's wearing the correct size in terms of the distance from her heel to the ball of her foot, it's just that maybe she has longer than average toes for her foot size. If she went up to the next size there'd be a gap at the back of the shoe, no way that'd be the correct size.

What are people's experiences/thoughts on this?

Easy

The "power of red" is definitely real. Once you overcome your reservations and wear red, it does boost your self-confidence. Heels provoke mixed reactions (approval and disapproval), and red also provokes the same mixed reactions, so red+heels amplifies that. If you can shrug off the disapproving glances (which are really quite mild), the positive reactions really make up for it.

Your choice to wear them with dark slim jeans is a great way to go. I like to also wear maybe a red t-shirt under a blue denim or black jacket/cardigan or at least some small element of red in the outfit. I think this colour-coordination helps to bring the red heels into an overall style statement so they're not just an isolated oddity. I think the same applies with other bright colours too, my other favourites are fuchsia and especially bright turquoise - both are fun and exciting to wear, but not quite the little extra magic that red seems to have.

What are you wearing by the pool with your heels? A big baggy pair of men's swimming trunks will be a style clash with heels and therefore grab people's attention. Are other people wearing heels by the pool too? if so what are they wearing with their heels? Are they turning heads too? Not that any of that should restrict your choice, it just depends how controversial a fashion statement you want to make.

Imagine yourself wearing your swimwear on a crowded city commuter train. Now imagine youtself wearing a smart business suit on a tropical beach. It's all context.

As for help and suggestions, I'd say wear your heels with whatever pool-side outfit you like, and enjoy turning heads (so long as they're a cool crowd).

Typewriters

Puffer, I'm glad you were "amused" and not offended, I certainly didn't intend to pronounce judgement on a fellow driver.

Try to find a longer space to practice, this will give you time to get into a steady walking rhythm, and will also give you the chance to try making small adjustments to feel what works best for you. You'll improve a lot quicker that way.

Thanks all. I'm really liking these shoes and glad I went back for the beige ones too, my other similarly coloured heels are all suedette so it's nice to add the patent ones to my collection. It's also nice to be wearing a style that seems quite popular, I see others wearing similar shoes. I enjoy the paradox of being different and blending in at the same time.

I see that you really feel comfortable with your look.  I would appreciate it very much if you can tell me how you got to feel so comfortable.  I have been thinking about wearing my boots publicly for a while but find it very hard.

I do feel very comfortable, but I also found it very hard at first. I don't think I'd have overcome that without the more experienced members of the forum, their advice and the self-belief they inspired. But when it comes down to it there's no substitute for personal experience, and there's no magic confidence boost, you just have to build confidence little by little each time. The hardest step is just to get the ball rolling.

My strategy is to wear my heels as part of an overall look I feel comfortable in and feel positive about, and choose environments that I feel comfortable and positive about too. I'd say don't wear your heels/outfits trying to look like someone else, wear them because you're trying to look like you! I feel that the sense of liberating your self-expression is a big part of gaining confidence.

If your boots are the ones in your avatar, I'd wear them over skinny jeans with a plain turtle-neck top and a blazer (or if you feel more apprehensive, maybe under bootcut jeans with a smart-casual jacket) and go to the cafe of a big museum or art gallery, classical music venue or even a big shopping mall or department store. Personally I do think autumn/winter outfits are easier to get started with, but you can go with jeans and a light summer shirt (and maybe court wedges rather than boots) during the summer and blend in nicely.

None of these are "rules" as such, it's just what worked for me, I hope there's something there that inspires what will work for you.

That looks like a very comfortable and relaxed summer style Mr X, the whole outfit flows with the fit of the jeans and it would all fall apart without the wedge heels, they're perfect.

I agree with what you said that just a friendly conversation would be great. It's not that we shock people as such, but what we choose to wear does tend to surprise people or catch them off guard, and we end up feeling like the invisible man. I think that having taken the initiative with fashion by wearing our heels, we also have to take the initiative to spark a conversation sometimes, I've found that people tend to respond very positively once we break the ice. The rare occasions that someone chooses to make a nice remark under their own initiative, that's just a bonus.

I realise that my MJ boots - intended to be worn by a man, despite the heel - are probably of little interest to those here who prefer more feminine styles, some of whom (like yourself) also wear other female clothes - and look good in them!   It does seem to me that the trend on this board is towards displaying more extreme styles in footwear and general appearance, and those of us who are a little more modest in our choices and aspirations (often because of limited availability of 'man-sized' footwear, in particular) are becoming something of a minority.

I actually thought that your boots have a more "extreme" distinctive styling that's far more bold than a conventional pair of (women's) court shoes or men's boots. I tend not to take many photos of my usual heels with jeans and shirt outfits because they're more of an unremarkable non-event these days, but even in a skirt I always present myself as "sir" not "madam". Far from being of little interest, I admire your originality in style, and we're all championing men in heels in our different ways.

Reading what you said about ankles bowing, it just occured to me that as I've got used to wearing higher heels, I've also got used to transferring more of my weight to the balls of my feet, and maybe that's transferred to how I walk in flats too. Also learning to walk gracefully in stilleto heels. especially on slippery tiled floor surfaces, has perhaps balanced out any asymmetries in my ankle position, and that's transferred to how I walk in wider heels whether they're high wedges or flats.

I wonder with your boots if it might be the long pointed toes that might be throwing your walking action into a more bowed pattern? The other thing that springs to mind is that if I'm wearing high heels close to the limit of what I can manage, I have to shorten my stride and "teeter" a little bit, otherwise a longer stride does tend to exaggerate any bowing in my ankles. Having become accustomed to pencil skirts helps with that (I also sit with my knees together on public transport, much to the relief of my female neighbour travellers), but guys in trousers may tend to keep a longer stride.

I couldn't resist going back for the beige version of the patent courts I bought in black and red last week. I wore them and the outfit in the photo to return a library book, go to the supermarket to buy a couple of things, and sit at a cafe for a while. The librarian was very friendly and polite, I was a bit over-dressed for the supermarket so I sensed a few double-takes but I've seen similarly dressed women doing their shopping on the way home from work, a little attention is to be expected. I exchanged everyday pleasantries with the cafe staff and a couple of customers.

The photo's not great, it's a reflection in a tinted window taken with my phone. I wore the heels with a black skirt and blazer and a dark turqoise top, inspired by seeing a newsreader on TV wearing a similar outfit. As you can see from the second photo, I felt perfectly comfortable and safe driving in those heels too, though of course I parked the car to take the photo, and my near foot is only just touching the pedal because I moved my foot back a bit so the other shoe was visible for the photo, I wouldn't actually drive like that.

I browse shoe shops every time I go out, almost like a routine for me. I like to visit Aldo, Office and House of Fraser. They make very classy shoes. Do you actually try the shoes in store? What is your latest addition?

These days I never buy a pair of heels without trying them on first, mostly at self-service stores but also occasionally at a store with a sales assistant, and it's never a problem. It sounds like you're already pretty comfortable in that environment and you're really close to making a breakthrough - just do it one day, I'd be amazed if they did anything other than treat you as a regular customer. I don't know about House of Fraser, but in my experience the staff at Aldo and Office are pretty cool. My latest purchase was a pair of beige patent courts from Primark, I couldn't resist going back for them after buying the same style in black and red last week.

How do you feel when you step out with heels on and knowing fully that everyone who sees you notices your choice of style and there is no hiding it? How do you make up your mind about it? About doing what you want to do regardless?

It's funny, before you do it for the first time you're thinking "what if people notice?" and trying to hide them, but once you've done it a couple of times you end up wondering "why has nobody noticed?" and even feeling a little disappointed that they're not noticing. Of course many people do notice but don't make a big deal out of something so trivial, and the ones who do react tend to be positive with a smile or even a compliment. One thing I would say though, if you wear your heels to places where women wouldn't feel at ease wearing heels, chances are that you won't feel at ease either, that's how I tend to make my mid up about it. Once you've built up a little experience and confidence you can get a bit more adventurous and become a high-heel trailblazer.

I'm rather disappointed that no-one has commented (positively or not) on my new boots described at #2234 above.   I have now road-tested them and they are quite comfortable to walk in outside but I'm still finding a tendency for my ankles to bow outwards a little.  I wonder why this is, as the boots themselves fit quite snugly and give some support - presumably heel height or my poor posture!  

They're quite a distinctive style Puffer, not quite my cup of tea but it's nice to see people expressing their own styles and, like you say, they would look good with the right pair of jeans and be very acceptable street wear.

As for the ankles bowing outwards, I do find that the heels of my flat shoes wear out slightly unevenly (more on the outside), but with high heels the wear seems to be even. I have one very old (20 years) pair of ankle boots (3½" heels) whose heels have worn unevenly, and they always felt like my ankles were bowing outwards even when they were new. I wonder as I've worn high heels over the years if it's actually corrected any bowing of my ankles, because I remember the unevenness of wear on flats being a lot more than it is now.

Thanks for posting your story morningsend, it's always nice to read about how others got hooked on heels. Those thigh boots are way taller than what I'd wear, but I like the shape of the heels and you wear them very well.  

Too scared to go into a high street fashion store and ask to try a pair of black patent court, 5.5 inch heel, in my size.

I'd suggest just popping in to stores to browse whenever you can. Be prepared to grab the opportunity to try them of if it arises, but don't expect it to happen, just enjoy browsing. Treat it the same as browsing for running shoes in a sports shop. You should wear an outfit that you'd feel comfortable wearing heels in, even if that's just jeans and a tshirt, whatever puts you most at ease. Put yourself in the situation enough times and when you're ready to try them on, you will. The staff at shoe shops tend to be way cooler about guys in heels than you'd imagine.

Please do tell us about that first time you went into a shop and bought your own first heels, and about your other 15 pairs of heels.

Alexandria

From my personal perspective, I like wearing my heels with quite conventional notions of style that usually come from the womenswear department. So in one way I'm conforming to conventional styles, but in another way I'm going against convention by presenting those styles as a guy.

While that's the personal expression I like, when I'm wearing a more "feminine" styles (like a skirt or dress), although I'm still presenting myself as a guy I sometimes get the feeling that I'm making it easy for people to perceive me as a guy trying to pretend to be a woman; therefore they miss the point about the fashion freedom of a guy in heels.

I sometimes choose to tone down the femininity by wearing male-inspired womenswear (like trousers, shirts, etc) because it projects the image of a guy in heels more strongly, and that's an expression I'm happy with. Personally I don't feel so much affinity with the contrast of traditional menswear with heels, so I don't choose to project that image, but I can see how others who do project that contrast are also challenging the gender conventions and advocating fashion freedom in their own way, and I support that, even if I wouldn't choose to dress that way myself.

I agree with what you say that this guy may find it harder to gain acceptance, but maybe that's precisely what makes it a more powerful challenge to convention, because he's harder to pigeon-hole into the exisiting stereotypes. Ultimately it's our collective diversity that's the most effective challenge because it redefines the generalisation that all guys in heels are the same.

I've actually been thinking about getting a pair. However I have an idea in my head if what I want and wouldn't be happy with anything else. I'd like a wide strap black gladiator style with a cork (faux or real) wedge. I bought a pair a while back from Walmart that now I regret returning as at the time I figured I would never wear them.

If this is the sort of thing you have in mind:

they're from New Look (£25), are available in sizes up to UK9, and it looks like they do international delivery to Canada (£7.50). They also come in white and oatmeal.

http://www.newlook.com/shop/shoe-gallery/view-all-shoes/black-cork-wedge-gladiator-sandals-_307235001

They also have a couple of other similar styles if you browse their site.