JSpikeheels
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JSpikeheels There's a lot of intelligent people on this forum and it will be interesting to see what comes of this.
...a guy may be "intelligent"...a guy may be inquisitive"...but few guys have both intelligence and inquisitiveness...
..which is why most men (in general) have not reached the "tipping point" that permits them the self-expression to explore the "other part of themselves" and look at us with "shock and awe" (tongue in cheek) when they see someone like we...(and because if they did consider expressing themselves they'd be on this forum..LOL)
Jim
JSpikeheels
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first of all thank you 'kneehighs' for opening a fascinating topic... ...I am having some trouble making a logical connection between a "male lesbian' and a "fashion freestyler"... the author of the linked article limits his anecdotes and interview material to disaffected males in their relations with females but makes no connection as to how this unhappiness may be reflected in his choices of attire... ..except to, perhaps, suggest that "freestylers" are unhappy with their roles in their relationships and "freestyling" is a form of stress-release/emotional sublimation of their frustrations at another level... ..and there may, indeed, be some merit in this suggestion but some of the author's assumptions take some pretty big leaps in their conclusions... ...as I said-great topic...these kinds of subjects contribute to an effort at understanding what makes us what we are... ..hope you guys add to this ...let's see what we can develop... Jim JSpikeheels
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...stopped in a Stein Mart Store this afternoon to exchange a pair of earrings for Donna..as I was looking in the case one of the salesladies came up to me gushing over the way I was just moving around with no problem in these babies...
...she started in explaining to me how she always wanted to wear heels but they always hurt her feet to try..I ended up explaining to her that all she should do is start with a small heel with just a 2 or 3 inch heel and then just start increasing the heel as she felt like she was ready for it...she was so excited she wants me to come back in a week or so and see her in her "starter-heels" at the store...
..this is no kid..this is about a 30 year old or more who "just made her day" when she saw me...
Jim
JSpikeheels
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you beat me to it..Jeff..those are my everyday boots for doing my pickups/deliveries..as remarked elsewhere, I love them so much I bought a second pair before they disappeared into the spring styles...I'll get a couple of pictures together of me in a week or two after the holidays... Happy New Year everyone Jim JSpikeheels
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I do not wear heels to get reactions. I wear them because I like the way they feel on my feet.
...well I opened a can of worms and that was my intention...
everyone of us who has travelled this road remembers how we have had to deal with and reconcile or overcome the challenges presented by what we perceive to be the expectations of family, society and culture--always those expectations of "others"-- to reach this level of satisfaction in allowing ourselves to discover our own expectations in wearing heels...
...if you have been on this road you will also agree that some days we have a more urgent need to put on the heels than others...what contributes to this "more or less need " are the external circumstances of our daily lives affecting the 'internal senses for which the heels provide a kind of pressure-release...
...now you begin to understand what I was reaching for when I asked "the great unspoken question"...seeing another person in heels is a sudden reminder that we are also "in heels" ...that other person becomes ourselves and our reactions to them are our reactions to ourselves...a sudden 'values-assessment self-test"...
...in the instant we make the connection from the others' heels to our own there is a sudden psychic linking in which we mirror our own sense of satisfaction with the degree of pleasure we perceive in the others' heels become the pleasure we perceive in our own...
Jim
JSpikeheels
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...this question is one that no one has seemed to ask..it could be a little unsettling to really consider... ..one of the reasons we wear heels is the reactions we get from others especially when we have beaten back the demons of "what would others think..." but has anyone taken this to a logical conclusion and closed "the circle of expectation? " ...you're in a store or a restaurant or somewhere on a public street and "you" walk by or are sitting in a restaurant or in a shopping aisle... .... what would be your reaction if you saw yourself (in heels) in a public place-but consider this from the perspective that you are not yourself looking out but someone else seeing you? ...what might your reaction be if you saw "you..." Jim JSpikeheels
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where does it hurt???
well you can add "my feelings" along with all the other places...have owned Fords all my life and as far as I am concerned life began and will end driving a "F-O-R-D..."
Jim
..here..just to rub it in...
"...remember, Vassily..one ping only.."
Sean Connery as Cmdr Marco Remius..
"The Hunt For Red October"
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...when I am at one of my pickup or deliveries and I happen to be wearing something with a heel " my girls" don't seem to say one word since we have had our "moments" on the subject when I first started wearing them... ...I guess the fact that I don't force the subject into the open or start a conversation about them specifically may be one reason but, most likely, my choices in boot-style has dropped below their attention-level and they don't actually look to see anymore... ...the places I do go where I know I will see people I don't know can be a little thrilling...usually stop around 2pm for a quick bite at a Taco Bell or an Arby's and I get a kick out of watching to see if 1) anyone notices 2) is it a girl or a guy 3) their reaction ...but I don't make eye contact with the guys-if I sense one is looking I just go about my business avoiding eye-contact wherever possible especially not holding momentary contact if it is made...no invitations to "go there" from me!!!!! ...but the ladies...that has a test to follow as well... if my heels are higher than hers I just smile to myself and try to give her an extra look... if her heels are high I also try get close enough to tell her I really like her heels...understanding human nature I can usually tell that she will look me over up and down..she will see my posture is how one should stand in heels and a woman "knows these things"...that's usually enough to let her know and but if I really want to engage her in conversations-like I would do in a shoe store where the topic would clearly address itself to high heels..but elsewhere I might ask her where she is the only one who can hear me I might ask her if she likes mine... if she's wearing flat shoes she has just scored a 'zero' on her open book test and no amount of tutoring can help a student who will just not apply herself... comments appreciated Jim
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please see my thread add-on under " the boots will soon be gone" under "EVERYBODY" Jim
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..driving around this afternoon I had worn my New Balance 'sneakers/trainers' because of those concerns mentioned elsewhere about the source of some of the discomfort I had been feeling in my hip and backside...one strategy is to eliminate one set of possible causes at a time and I was using a massage cushion my son had given me a while ago...
...but I was feeling the need for a psychic pick-me-up and I knew just what I needed...headed over to my Payless on "construction-corner' from the earlier post and looked over what styles they had left before all the winter stuff is/boots are gone...
...I ended up buying a second pair of those RADAR-style boots..they were down to only two pair remaining and they had the price marked down to FIFTEEN BUCKS!!! who can say 'no' for that price???
...worth another look I think...
...love that style..they're calf-high..and, just look at that heel!!!!
Jim
JSpikeheels
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my Payless and Target Stores are stocking the spring lines already..so if any of you have your eyes on boots be warned...they may not be there when you look for them...
I've got my eye on these but they're still wanting $36.99 for them while some of the similar but "olive' and 'brown" same style-have already been dropped to $25.89..and I'm trying to save a couple dollars...
Jim
JSpikeheels
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this is a strange title for a thread about highheels but I was wondering where your aches and pains are or have developed as you practiced and became proficient with high heels...
...I have the typical soreness on the balls of my feet and along the edges of my toes where callouses form from the unanticipated pressure-points but I do not have problems in my calves or thighs...
...but this is the point of this post: I do have a nexus of pain in my left buttock where the sciatic nerve begins its journey...however, there is a caveat to this description and that is this:
my truck has been completely mechanically rebuilt but I still have the original seats...
I suspect that the inside material has degraded and when I drive my courier miles the braces that form the skeleton of the seat assembly may be pressing against my back and buttock causing the pain-I don't feel it when I am driving because muscle-memory cancels out any discomfort when I am sitting in the seat but it sure aches at might when I stretch completely out on the bed...
I'm going to have someone at an auto upholstery shop take a look at the seat assembly but I wonder if wearing high heels has caused any of you discomfort in the areas I have described and i don't want to completely dismiss the possibility at least...want to eliminate all other possibilities before I have to consider cutting back on the high heels...
Jim
JSpikeheels
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see the link in the thread I posted earlier to the ankle-boot...Seduce also has a knee-high style in rubber too:
http://www.snaz75.com/pl-seduce-2002.html
...and they are currently offering free shipping...but I would take a bet they have a special coming after Christmas...
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I went out today in the five inch spikeheel rubber boots to a store called Stein Mart...I wore crew socks and took along the four inch pointed toe croc-boots in case my feet hurt later...the sales lady in Stein Mart said
"you're the guy who was in here a couple of weeks ago in those spikeheel boots with the stiletto-heel"
"dat be me.." I sez..."did you like them?"
" really did...*** and I couldn't stop talking about them"
" well take a look at these..."
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..my feet were really tight in those rubber boots and crew socks so I changed in the truck to the ones I posted in my recent threads.."3 of 3" and wore them to a Target Superstore while I went to buy some tension rods to block off my windows...walked all over that store and I'm sure I got plenty of notice but some days you're out for the attention and some days you're not...
(...sometimes you feel like a nut..sometimes you don't..)
I am just thrilled to have the skills, the flexibility in my muscles and skeleton and not least of all the circumstances and dynamics in my personal/semi-professional (being self-employed and semi-retired doesn't hurt) life at sixty-one to be able to enjoy one of my life's greatest pleasures while I still can...I will always be able to look back on this when the adventure is over and say "I was a success at something I craved to do my entire life and I accomplished exactly that!!"
Cheers
Jim
JSpikeheels
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Yeah that is a good point. And I'm see what everyone is saying you gotta be who you are no doubt. But my thing is I've allways viewed relationships (serious relationships I should say) as a comprimise. Meaning that sometimes in order to make it work we have to be willing to change, sacrafice, or at least dont' do some things as much because your partner may be really uncomftorable with it. It dosen't mean your not being you. At least I don't think it does. And I'm not saying plats should throw away his shoes. Not saying that I would throw away my shoes in this situation. But I would first try to sit down and have a serious discussion about it. About why you do it. People's views on it, maybe even introduce her to this site to get more prespective, then after that if she is still really uncomfortable with it then comprimise, maybe cut down your collection and not do it as much, or get rid of your collection is she is willing to wear a sexy pair of heels everynowandthen on those special "bedroom" occasions or something. I'm just saying that from my own personal experience nowadays a gf can be a hard thing to come by. And if your really in love then isn't it wroth it? This all of course with a serious relationship. If it was someone I just met and only had gone on a few dates with I would be more likely to just say oh well. But thats just what I think. I don't know...
...you know, a lot of women simply won't tell you what she doesn't like about you wearing heels...my wife thinks all she has to say is "it makes me uncomfortable...I don't know why...it just does"
try getting around that argument!!!
JSpikeheels
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get a look at these beauties...
...this is Payless Shoes Style:Radar that has disappeared from the Payless on-line website...one particular store here in town is located on a corner in a very highly-impacted construction area and nearly impossible to navigate into and out of their small parking lot...
...so they have had a lot of business impacted by the mess all around them but bad for everyone else=good for me because I was in there today looking for my size in a different style boot and I discovered several pair in my size of a number of styles that have sold out in all of the locations I have been looking in all over Charlotte...
...these are exactly the transition to a stiletto heel I have been looking for..the boots styles are so similar to many of the styles "my girls" have already gotten used to that the boots will hardly evoke any notice...until one of them catches her eye on the spikeheel...and then it's up to her to mention it...(smiles)
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I wore them out of the store this afternoon and went about my schedule and no one paid me any attention--they're all used to me by now..but when I was at the General Mail Facility dropping off my (mail) deliveries one of the lady mail(ladies) guess I would call her noticed the high heel and she yelled right out to me "are you wearing heels?"
...I gave her a glimpse and smiles and said" if a guy has got the nerve to wear them then he thanks the lady for noticing..."
...the fun is just beginning...took Donna to dinner this evening at our local Hops Brewery...still in these brown stiletto heels-no one as much as noticed and I was okay with that-cause Donna was one who never said "peep"--
--even when I mentioned to her that this was an anniversary..."Which anniversary is that?" she just had to know...
"...this is the anniversary of the last time we were here-that was our first 'date' when we both wore heels!!!"
Cheers
Jim
JSpikeheels
by the way, they're 12W which means I can wear them with my usual comfortable bulkier crew-style socks-which I prefer over thinner trouser-socks and they are ankle boots so I can get them easily zipped up and clasped at the top (unlike knee-highs and wide calves)
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continuing the essay...
after getting everyone used to the styles I just showed you I introduced these to the mix as stilettos began to make their first appearance...
then I acquired these beauties to increase the temperature when I enter a room:
...but I haven't ventured out in them yet or in these...
...I just want to get everyone used to seeing a heel getting closer to a true stiletto before I reveal the unmistakable true spikeheel...
...and that brings me to part three..I bought these beauties today...
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They are quite nice, like them. Are they knee high, thigh highs?
http://www.snaz75.com/pl-seduce-1002.html
they are ankle boots...I can usually zip the ankle boots right up...the knee highs..not all the way up at first but eventually all the way to the top...
really looking forward to wearing these on an every day basis..I have a new thread for everyone that discusses that...
Jim
JSpikeheels
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here are a couple of pictures of those new Pleaser Seduce "rubber" boots I was crowing about in the 'pleaser sizing' thread in the 'for the CD's, etc" forum...
..they are shiny as you would expect rubber to be but not "patent shiny" and they feel wonderful...but I'm not quite ready for a full-no-return-home-if-they're-uncomfortable day's wear in a full five inch stiletto...but, it's coming...
Cheers
Jim
JSpikeheels
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Ha!!!! I took a delivery Uptown this morning right along South Tryon Street which is right at "The Square" the "crossroads of the Carolinas" where Trade and Tryon Streets cross... ...I parked the truck in a loading zone where trucks and courier vehicles usually park and carried my plans to the architects' place of business about a block and a half away...I did not see one single woman cross my path the entire distance from the truck to the clients' building-front...guys and men alone or standing in groups of two or three...and, men will notice you if you come walking through in a boot with a heel showing...especially with none of the fairer sex in sight to diffuse their attention... ...I just walked on along...but I will tell you I had a bit of the "self-conscious tickles" -you all know...those feelings when we first went out and we thought every one was looking..well, sometimes EVERYONE IS!!! Jim JSpikeheels ...good thing I was wearing the one in the post from a couple days ago-those are the ones I feel most comfortable with showing them off when I want or need to...
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Last thing to think about, It takes twice as many steps in 5" heels to reach your destination as if you were wearing a much lower heels, make sure hubby knows that so he does not walk at warp speed away from you or burn you out.
That is probably the most overlooked part of breaking in the custom of wearing high heels..
...women take smaller steps so the spacing between each step-"heel down-roll through-step off"-is not as wide-apart as we men are accustomed to making in generally flat shoes...
...each shoe-heel-height has it's one geometry meaning that it has a cadence, a spacing in the landing-rolling-stepping off unique to itself that you will pick up as you practice...
...you will shorten the step you were previously taking and the shorter distance-between will have a nice, comfortable "just-right" feel to it that can be pleasurable in its own right if you're really into it...
when I was out this weekend I was managing fine in 3 1/2 inch Frederick's stiletto boots with very pointy toes until I forgot I was in them and started to walk like a guy would be walking...longer steps...and I suddenly developed a pressure-point along the side of my right-great-toe three hours after I started out in them...when I realized what I was doing it felt like I had been running-that is, the hurried steps forcing my foot down where a man's step would come down-not the spacing and careful steps demanded by the heel...and that finished it for the day for as soon as I got home off they came...
..of course I wore heels again that evening -recounted elsewhere but different shape and no pressure where I had the problem earlier...
...so define the stride you feel most comfortable taking and make it your own...
Jim
JSpikeheels
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It's great for everyone to say "just go anywhere", but for many of us, it just simply is not that easy. For a 50+ year old man, a bit overweight too boot, to be wearing 4" spike heel pumps in public is just not something those of us living in areas like the midwest u.s. are going to do without batting an eye. In many places, you could probably still get arrested for doing that! I agree that it would be wonderful if there would be a place where one could go and just be yourself while enjoying the sensations of walking about in your favorite heels. I think for most of us, it's just not going to happen. I have worn a few pairs of heeled loafers on the street, but only after dark and not in populated areas. Paranoid? Damn right I am, along with what I would bet are the majority of males that like to wear heels. If the number of high heels sold to men in the US was say 10,000, if you said that 10% of those shoes ever saw the light of day, I'd take the under! So if anyone would like to develop say a shopping mall where on Tuesday nights, shopping would be limited to men in high heels and anyone else that would have absolutely no problem shopping with men in high heels, I'd be sure to shop there! LOL
I started with a medium boot..definitely..under jeans and was absolutely terrified the first time I wore them into a drugstore and right back out to my truck..
the floors felt like I was about to fly off my feet onto my "azay" as some might say...and I was convinced every pair of eyes was staring at me..
..but once "safely" back in my truck the sense of wonder and accomplishment swept over me and I have never felt the same...
..choose a heel as low as you feel comfortable (with),
cut and paste..I like these..
cover as much of it as you think prudent and, as Jean-Luc Picard Captain of the Starfleet Vessel "Enterprise" would say "make it so"...and report back to us how it felt...
Best wishes and good luck
Jim
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the posted pics above is bordering on abused to me... emphasis on bordering. they will work ok in most casual work settings, everyday heeling settings, or social settings.. just not in topnotch or formal or conservative settings.
RPM
those heels are worn at home for strictly fixing supper and sitting in her recliner and wearing them for me to enjoy in the evenings when it's just she and I...never for more public settings...and she has been wearing these "high-heel bedroom slippers"--that is what they are- around here every evening and weekends for more than three years...we polish them up from time to time and they look clean, neat but well-worn...but anyone who thinks that high heels serve only the purpose to wear outside the house in absolutely pristine-like "don't touch me-don't even think of it" condition are missing another of life's many pleasures...
signs of wear only mean that the shoes have seen a lot of pleasure and purpose and that it's time for a little touch-up polish ...
...and, while I'm on my soapbox, let's be careful to not attach labels to perceptions of what one considers "abusive behavior to one's high heels"...
now I'm done...
Jim
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...Donna and I went Christmas shopping all afternoon-she wore boots identical to the ones I showed you all in my post below-the black 3 1/2" Frederick's Of Hollywood ankle boots...(pause for drumroll)...and I wore them mine again today...
got to add at least one jpeg to spice the story a little..
...we stopped by a supermarket and walked the aisles while she picked up a few things, then to a warehouse grocery/anything store (Sam's Club for those here in the USA) and a couple of clothing/jewelry stores and I did it all on those stiletto-heels-and felt great doing it...
...this was especially gratifying today because she "spoke not a word but went straight to her work.." (words from 'The Night Before Christmas')...she was completely unaffected by my choice and while she didn't bend over and kiss them-she did treat me like she was actually pleased to be out with me...
...to be honest I though she would have had a much greater inertia of resentment but she is becoming more accepting..and maybe some actual encouragement is on the way as she is realizing that I'm still the same guy she has always known and loved...and who buys her earrings for no other reason than I-love-you...
...JeffB recently mentioned a 'bottomless well of enjoyment" and I thank him for that description for I am discovering it's even better than I had imagined it would be...
Jim
JSpikeheels
PS: I am now accepting emails...fixed my options..thx jmc
(sidebar: no one seemed to even notice-except for a couple of little kids-down there at ground-level(LOL) with big eyes and one old man pushing a Sam's Club dolly full of product to be stocked who just about dislocated his neck looking up from
the floor to see if it really was a guy in those stilettos(LOL)
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Good Morning Everyone:
Yesterday was quite a day for me...but my story started Thursday evening...
All day as I drove around doing my pickups and deliveries I wore these...
(side note: I had actually worn trouser socks-thinner than crew-style socks) with the intention of wearing my Frederick's Of Hollywood stiletto-heel boots-but I got a pickup from a customer I knew would be heavy so I switched to the brown boots for the additional risk-management with the extra lifting)
but I felt like I needed to quit fooling around and get to the stilettos on the FOH's (picture coming up later as my story develops) and, so, all day I thought about what I was going to do when I got home...
...I have a little friend who works at one of the Payless Stores nearby and I had been telling her about those white ones..
with the five inch heel and while I have been working every day in boots with varying heel thicknesses I have been feeling a stronger and stronger pull to get on stilettos...
...so, Thursday evening I came home and changed and actually wore these to the store-she was not there but the important thing to note was that I actually ventured out in a full five STILETTO for the first time- stretching my calf muscles into the new positions in a situation where I had to walk in them to and from my truck...
...so part one of my story is the successful transition to the exhilaration of a five inch stiletto in public-and white patent is pretty hard to miss...
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Friday morning..I was still flying from the night before...I feel like "once you go (stiletto)-you never go back" ...beginning about 9am I dressed in my long-length Wranglers (32inch length to the seam) with these babies...
and didn't take them off until we got home from dinner later that evening about 9:30pm...
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but the story does not end there...
...when I came home from work around 5:45pm our son was at the house...up until yesterday I had been keeping a very low profile around him with my heel-wearing-but yesterday I just went about fixing my tea, went in and sat down and never took them off-just sat there in front of him and never mentioned a word...just went about "being Dad"...
...Donna went in and changed into jeans with boots(herself) and we went out to one of our favorite restaurants---this is one of the places I had mentioned some time ago where Donna didn't want to be caught 'dead" with me in those high heel boots but she's getting better...well after last night she is definitely getting better because there we went-the three of us- and, me still in those boots, had a very nice meal, those boots there for all the world to see, me secretly thrilled at all the whole thing and just an amazing time...
(Now, it's Saturday morning here and Donna and I will be going out later to do some Christmas shopping and the stilettos are staying on every day now...well, we'll see-at least I imagine they will...will just have to let you know what actually develops..)
Jim
JSpikeheels
boots soon will be gone
in For Everybody
Posted
...Payless has all but cleaned out the last of the fall/winter styles so boots are just about gone...but I was in my store today and these were marked down to twelve bucks!!!
http://www.payless.com/Catalog/ProductDetail.aspx?&TLC=Womens&SLC=WomensBoots&BLC=WomensBootsTrendy&Width=Regular&ItemCode=55207&LotNumber=050565&Type=Adult&Popularity=107&DescriptiveColor=Tan
...twelve bucks!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
brought them home...guess there is nothing lonelier than the last pair of boots in a shoe rack...
http://www.payless.com/Catalog/ProductDetail.aspx?&TLC=Womens&SLC=WomensBoots&BLC=WomensBootsTrendy&Width=Wide&ItemCode=55390&LotNumber=051066&Type=Adult&Popularity=53&DescriptiveColor=Leopard
still a couple pair of these in there..but a little over-the-top for a guy...
"ya folla'...?"
Doyle Lonnegan
(Robert Shaw character... "The Sting")
http://www.payless.com/Catalog/ProductDetail.aspx?&TLC=Womens&SLC=WomensBoots&BLC=WomensBootsTrendy&Width=Regular&ItemCode=55208&LotNumber=050572&Type=Adult&Popularity=238&DescriptiveColor=Pewter
...and I saw a pair of these in there, too...but I don't want to collect too many "little heels" until I have a better feeling about wearing them instead of the skyscrapers...
Jim
JSpikeheels