xaphod

I drive in heels all the time unless, like today, I did physical work which involved getting dirty. Afterwards, I had a long shower to remove the dirt, and changed into fresh clothes .... and 4" blocks, to return a trailer to a friend's place and eat a pub meal on the way home. I have a jeep where the seating position is more upright than most cars. This means I can put the tip of a 4" heel on the floor and reach the pedals with my toes. This gives good clutch control. The other advantage is that the backs of my heels don't touch the floor and get worn and unsightly. With 5" heels, there isn't enough length between heel tip and toe end to bridge the gap between floor and clutch pedal, so I have to do what many small-footed women do and balance my whole foot on the clutch. This means the level of control is not as great, but thankfully the clutch is smooth and progressive on this vehicle, so I don't find myself leaping off from stationary like a scalded cat. The gas pedal is longer, so doesn't give problems. I've driven in 2" plats and 6" heels before, and the only thing I had to do was to move the driver's seat back. I had to do an emergency stop while driving in these plats. With the seat moved back to allow for the plats, all the subconscious movements of my feet were the same, but I caught some of the metalwork of the jeep in my hurry to stop. This slowed my reaction down by a fraction of a second and put a horrible cut in my nice new plats. Yes, I did manage to stop in time. My conclusions about driving in heels go along the lines:- If you are comfortable walking in 4.5" heels and can do most things without really noticing they are there, then you should be OK to drive in them. Yes, I can walk in 5.5", but it certainly isn't easy and effortless. Driving must be, so don't drive in heels that you can't walk in easily. This goes for plats too. I find the 2" plats heavy going for walking, and, as I have experienced, not so clever for driving. IF YOU CAN'T WALK IN EFFORTLESSLY IN 'EM, DON'T DRIVE IN 'EM.

Personally, I think black and sync pulses was better. Tecchie joke.

I've only seen a little coverage before I felt the need to do severe damage to the idiot's lantern (television). Do actors/actresses in Hollywood have so little brain that when called to speak without lines, autocue, or idiot cards, they can only mumble platitudes ? Do people realise that the glitz and applique glamour of Hollywood has no bearing on real life ? .... yes I know that some seem to think that if you spin a subject sufficiently, illusion will be perceived as true. However I do know that no amount of spin and no amount of self-belief can affect real life. Going back to a sailing story a few years ago:- ------------------------------------------------------------------ Six big and hard policemen had chartered a sailboat for a holiday. The last evening they spent in Poole harbour and went ashore for lots of beers in a pub. Late-ish the next morning they left Poole to sail the 7 hours to Southampton via the Needles lighthouse on the Isle of Wight. About the same time the cops were going to the pub, Xaphod left the Channel Isles to sail across the English Channel to Southampton by himself. Xaphod had been looking at the weather and tides and knew a vicious secondary low pressure area was expected to pass across the south of the UK the next afternoon, and that the tide would be unfavourable after noon that day. Xaphod had an exhilarating sail across the Channel overnight, chucking quite a lot of water about and not slowing below 7 knots (that's quick for my old tub), and had tied up in his berth by about 10 am. After a late breakfast, with the wind now howling in the rigging, Xaphod hit the sack for lots of satisfying Zzzzz. About this time, 6 big and hard macho policemen were dying on the Shingles Bank opposite the Needles lighthouse, overconfident in their perception of themselves, believing that they could have a skinful, get up late, and fight wind and tide. ------------------------------------------------------------------ Sorry to digress, but it's Springtime and I'm feeling the need to forget about heels (for a while) and go sailing.

Let's get away from this trivial man/woman stuff and ask the Nuclear Option question. If you have a dark side, you will appreciate:- What's the point of it all .... why bother ? (sorry, Laurie, if this presses too many buttons)

Following on from the 'fishing for compliments' idea .... Having been caught out before, I prepare a totally 'off the wall' response to the 'what are you thinking about' question. If, at the time, I'm thinking something along the lines 'God this is boring, I'd rather be sailing close hauled into a force 7', then, to keep the domestic peace, I have something innocuous to say.

From 'The Week', a news digest for busy people. --------------------------------------------------------------------- Bad week for the US immigration service .... with the news that it has granted visas to two of the terrorists who flew aircraft into the Twin Towers 6 months ago. The agency was not only unaware that the men were dangerous, but also they were dead !

In Ruth's case, I would say 'studied indifference'. I went to see her to administer alcoholic and emotional support on Friday, after she had had the 5 hour personal interview at the end of an Inland Revenue (IRS) investigation at her business. I wore a pair of 4.5" blade knee-high boots during the evening and nothing was said about these. I told Ruth of the UK_heel_2002 weekend and she was pleased that I had enjoyed myself with a bunch of fellow afficianados. Actually, she was more interested in some of my descriptions of the characters, than what we wore or what we did. I can't make up my mind whether she thinks that what I wear is irrelevant to who I am, or whether she prefers to avoid my heel wearing topic by not talking about it. PS .... On my way I dropped in for a quick tour of Lakeside. Blisters has disappeared, and so has my hat shop. Oh hell, this place is becoming as anonymous as any UK high street, with all the big chain stores and nothing else !

" What are you thinking about? " I remember my best (and 100% honest) answer one occasion was 'the design of infrasonic bass speakers'. The reply to this was 'Oh'. It's surprising how much emphasis can be put into a mere monosyllable. Amongst other things, it conveyed that I was in the doghouse again !

The Dictes and Sayings of the Philosophers, 1477. From the foreword written by William Caxton:- "The women of this country are right good, pleasant, humble, discreet, sober, chaste, obedient to their husbands, true, secret, steadfast, ever busy, never idle, temperate in speaking and virtuous in all their works. Or at least they should be so."

Why not outside the V and A? It's easier to get there from South Ken tube.

FF, The sort of woman who is happy about males in heels, as we have seen from this group, is a pretty exceptional person. I'm working on the basis that T's mum is fairly 'middle of the road' and has the best interests of her son at heart, so will try to protect him from the ridicule of others while, to her, he is still growing up. At this stage, too much unbridled enthusiasm will inevitably lead to disappointment, better to settle for cautious optimism. I'd like to be wrong, but I bet you a pint my guess is not too far off the mark. PS Two tickets booked for the GSO

Hmmm, this smacks too much of the Baftas, the Golden Globe and the ultimate in mutual self-congratulation, the Oscar farce. When are we going to start employing our individual publicists ? Seriously, I don't think we need this. As a cyber-community with a common interest, we have found like-minded souls, all with their strengths and weaknesses, but together I think we are the happiest bunch of people on the net. Just compare the slanging match which passes for discussion on the Trisha site (you will have to do a search for the link) with our easy-going bunch of characters. This thread is fine for a bit of fun, but it could so easily cause divisions. It would be a pity for this to happen with everybody working so well together. For my part, I just do my own style thing. If this helps anyone else in their life, then I'm pleased. PS Any more comments like Highlucs, and I won't be able to get my head through the front door !

FF, My way of measuring heels does not stop at the 4" of a finger length. By placing the tip of my index finger at the top of a heel, the scale goes something like:- 'lifeline' crease in my palm .... 4" .... not bad crease next to the bottom of my thumb .... 5" .... interesting ball of my thumb .... 6" .... PLAYTIME

Hiya, T Knowing mums, it aint over yet. Good so far, but I would be ready for the next installment in this saga. It could be that your mum agreed not to tell your sister because she has as much to lose if your sis broadcasts your heel wearing to all at school. If you are lucky, I think you will be allowed to wear your heels in the house when your sis is not around, but I bet you won't be allowed to buy any more. I think your mum is most likely to regard this as a 'phase' you are going through, and which you will eventually grow out of, if nothing is done to reinforce the stimulus.

Spot the clanger .... not mine but the GSO's. The concert is on Sarurday 16th. Firefox and myself will be there.

Hiya, H, Interesting question. For me it depends on the circumstances and my mood. When I was a teenager 'up north', I had a fairly undecipherable accent. I could barely communicate with this southern lot who seem to think that the northerners are stupid. After lots of selfconscious attempts, I managed to smooth out the pronunciation so people could understand me. (Actually, Beeblebrox, from Sweden, paid me the compliment on UK_heel_2002 that I was very easy to understand.) With the realisation that a perfect 'plum in mouth' accent was neither necessary nor, in most cases, desirable, and when making technical presentations I generally knew as much as the audience, and a hell of a lot more about the specific topic, I realised that I could stand up in front of as many people as necessary and say my piece. As far as 99.9% of people are concerned, I prefer my own company, so when I dress differently, I find the attention I receive unwelcome. In most cases, you will find that it is natural curiosity, with no malice intended. For example, if there is a person with, say, a facial disfigurement, most people will take a second look. I suppose, most of the time, these people get used to being looked at. I bet they wish it didn't happen sometimes, but if they are annoyed they must eventually realise that the vast majority of people are only doing what comes naturally and have no ill intentions. There will be one or two who havn't grown up and will act like children at school who are unmerciless in taunting the fat kid, the short kid or the kid with thick spectacles. These bullies are beneath contempt and are best ignored. Funnily enough, if they start shouting at you in a public place and you say nothing, everybody else turns and looks in their direction. They usually shut up then, because they don't like the attention. There are the bonuses though. Sometimes you will be complimented on your courage to dress as you wish, often by strangers you would least expect. When that happens to me, it makes my day. I've had some very pleasant conversations with total strangers before. This would never have happened if it hadn't been for the hat, the long leather coat and the knee boots outside trousers. Building up your confidence takes time in small progressions you feel comfortable with. Sometime in the future when you dress in the way you want, I guarantee you will enjoy it. Even now, when wearing something outrageous, I get the jitters sometimes, but with an increasing amount of experience behind me, I realise that I'm just being silly. Similarly, my professional work experience has allowed me to read a speech to an audience of 200 general public on a subject I didn't know too much about. I even ballsed a part up where I jumped a line, so I surprised even myself by saying, "I beg your pardon, I'll do that again." Nobody threw any rotten eggs, and I think my performance was better received because I was polite. <font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: xaphod on 2002-03-11 22:09 ]</font>

I will be going to their performance on Sunday 16th March at 7:30 pm. The programme is:- Mahler .... Symphony #1 Strauss .... Don Juan Delius .... LaCalinda There are usually a few seats unsold on the night, but if anyone wants me to book, drop me a private message.

This one's been around for a while. I sent it as an email in 1996, then received it back via whatever circuitous route in 1999. If you havn't seen it, enjoy ..... We have you on radar 2 miles dead ahead, please alter your course 10 degrees to starboard. Sorry, I suggest you alter course instead. I REPEAT, please alter course. Sorry that is not possible. WE ARE A LARGE VESSEL and restricted in ability to manoueuvre, alter course 10 degrees to starboard NOW. I cannot alter course. If you wish to avoid a collision, I'm afraid you must alter course. THIS IS A LARGE UNITED STATES NAVY AIRCRAFT CARRIER .... YOU WILL ALTER COURSE 10 DEGREES TO STARBOARD ! this is a lighthouse ...... your call

To quote Bert ------------------------------------------------------- Strangely enough she's very smart, academically educated, well traveled, communicative, open minded, but that doesn't make it any easier to see through the prejudices... ------------------------------------------------------- Aha, I wasn't out on a limb. That describes the love of my life in a nutshell. She was the CEO's secretary for a largish UK company (about 1000 employees), not necessarily leading from the front, but someone totally reliable and totally capable in organising things. Her relaxation was playing bridge. I remember one day sketchily describing a hand and bidding from one of my lunchtime games with work colleagues. I just play for fun, but what I found scary (and mightily impressive) was the way she assimilated the information, could apparently see the hands in front of her, and planned her strategy in less time it takes to read this. Anyway, after we had been seeing each other for about 6 months and thoughts were beginning to tend towards marriage, I decided to do the big 'fess up'. Cataclysm, tears, anger, sadness, contempt, love. I've never seen all this and more demonstrated by one person simultaneously. I was accused of being a transvestite and gay. She was so distraught that reasoning was beyond her. I tried to comfort her but she told me to just go. She went home to her parents, but when I tried to phone her there, I was told that I was not to try to contact her again. A few months later I managed to persuade her to join me for a beer (she drank real ale in pints), but, despite many other things we had in common, there was a gulf between us as if we were talking from opposite ends of the bar. She had moved forwards. I had had a lot of practice in rebuilding my psyche. I think we both parted yearning for what might have been, were it not for my damn heel fetish.

Hi, Plat We sortof worked it out on the old board :- Degree of some sort ... > 90% Professional qualification ... about 50% Doctorate ... about 15% University of life ... 100% Laurie, I don't think we are insane. I know we do think, not necesarily in the conventional rut. This, to the stumblebums, is insane. For example, I was talking to the lady who collects the money for the Parish Magazine about the common link between Islam and Christianity, possibly being Joseph of Aramithrea. Nosy next door was earwigging as normal with his jaw dropped. He's never heard me talk like that because I know such thoughts are FAR out of his orbit. <font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: xaphod on 2002-03-09 19:12 ]</font>

Prufrock is a lighthearted column in the Sunday Times business section. Here's their piece on 'Men in Skirts'. It was accompanied with a photo showing a man in suit, tie, boring shoes, trousers, but with an extra layer being a calf-length skirt. A couple of female city types are looking over their shoulders for a better look at the apparition. ------------------------------------------------------------------- To mark the launch of the Men in Skirts exhibition at the Victoria and Albert Museum, fashion designer Ozwald Boateng constructed a special pinstriped suit for Prufrock to take around the City. It came, of course, complete with a skirt. We took a small army of fashion experts to find out if London's bankers would try a different look on the trading floors. First up was Merril Lynch, who said: "It won't catch on in a recession. You need to wait for a bull market - you can do anything in a bull market." An accountant from Ernst and Young thought it looked nice, but wasn't having any of it: "It's a skirt - and men don't wear skirts." Some passing builders were less polite. Then it was to the Bank of England, its people famous for their humour and sartorial elegance. We got through a layer of security, but were told Sir Edward George was busy. Vanessa Crowe, one particularly cantankerous minion, who refused to haul herself to reception, said: "I don't think the Governor would look good in a skirt and we don't want to be involved." Boateng was disappointed: "Perhaps she thought it was a dress." -------------------------------------------------------------------

I've been receiving a load of email spam from Delphi. I suspect it's when I registered for the shoe forum there. Anyone else have the same problem?

Boy, did I push the big red button this time ! I came across an interesting statistic a few months ago. In the UK in the 1930s there was one civil servant for every 10 people. Now there is 1 civil servant for every 3. In the end, of course, there will be more civil servants administering more rules to extract more money from fewer people who create wealth. This leads to my Sweden scenario where the hangers-on outvote the wealth creators. I'm not sure if the Swedish taxes are graduated, but I know of some Engineers who went to work there in the mid 90s. Now, Engineers are paid pretty crap, about $(US) 40k in the UK, maybe double that for the short-term contract in Sweden. Even so, I remember these guys tellng me they got clobbered for 65%. In the end, they reckoned that it wasn't worth the hassle. Of course the agents who set up the job took their 20% and went home laughing, presumably about how the mugs bought the line that the tax aspect had been sorted out. About companies being sucked dry ..... When I first joined the Marconi Company in the 70s there were about 20000 people working in Chelmsford for Marconi. At the time it was not long after GEC (that's the General Electric Company of the UK, not GE of the USA) took them over. Over the next 20 years the workforce gradually dwindled to less than 3000. I won't say why, but, despite all the 'arent we great and aren't we making lots of profit' words promulgated by GEC, Marconis seem now to be a vestige of their former self. Ye Gods, I remember them doing digital television in 1974 at Baddow Research and talking to a guy describing what is now known as mpeg in 1977. Did GEC fund any further development? .... HA HA sob sob. I don't know whether to laugh or cry, because, with their semiconductor fab they had then, they could have been banging out GEC-Marconi mpeg chips years before anyone else. Finally, here's a nice little one from Alderney in the UK Channel Isles. Over the last couple of years, great debate has raged over the Admiralty Breakwater, a 3/4 mile long wall built in about 1850 across a large bay. The big idea then was that Cherbourg which was, and still is a French naval port, is just around the corner .... hell even in my sailing boat the trip takes me less than 4 hours. Now in 1850 the British and French didn't entirely see eye to eye, so it was thought a good idea to have a big harbour to park a few warships in, just round the corner from Cherbourg. Over the years work has been necessary to maintain the harbour wall, and if I remember right, about $150k is spent on maintenance annually. Out of the blue, some bigwig in Guernsey decides this is costing too much money and commissions a study of the future of the harbour. It seems that the best thing to do is to let this venerable structure fall into the sea and build a modern shorter harbour wall inside the old one, thereby reducing the sheltered water area to 1/3 ish, and pissing off a lot of yachties into the bargain. For some reason the rock for the new wall has to be shipped in from far away, despite the fact that Alderney is a huge lump of granite sticking up out of the Atlantic and the old Victorian railway between the old quarry and the harbour is still there (it's used to give kids steam engine rides in Summer). Some 'research' was done and, if I've got my facts right, it turns out the Guernsey bigwig's wife was a director of the company who would ship in the rock from far away (or something like that). Call me an idealist, but I think the world would be a better place if a lot of politicians met up with some high-speed lead, then the wealth creators taxes would get, unadulterated, to the less fortunate people who really need some help in life. PS .... Highluc, tell us the story of how the MV-Augusta helicopter affair brought down the Belgian Government. (Was it MV-Augusta or some other, I forget).

No, I'm not an accountant, but I see a few oblique references to the taxation policies of each others' countries. OK, guys and girls, let's compare notes. For example, Highluc mentioned that some Dutch people live in Belgium to get around the Dutch property taxes (BTW do the Dutch still have a wealth tax whereby you have to pay the Dutch Government a percentage of your net global worth each year ? ) That sounds like a lovely pan-Europe tax strategy if Euro-State integration becomes a reality. Oh, BTW Dim Wim (Duisenberg) is Dutch, hmmmm. Inga, tell us what really narks you about Australian taxes .... yes, I know your socialist Government is desperate for cash, extracted from an ever-decreasing number of wealth producers (much like our lot). Beeblebrox .... is Swedish income tax still 65% ? Which Swedish idiot dreampt up the idea that unemployment benefit in Sweden is 2/3 of the salary of the person's last job? Did the same idiot consider that people would just love the idea of being made unemployed, so they could go off to have fun on 2/3 of their salary, with every poor sod who was fool enough to work paying for them? A simplistic analysis of this works out at 1/2 of the people work and 1/2 of the people live off the other half. By the looks of this, slightly fewer than half of the people work, so when it comes to a vote, the people who are on benefit outvote the poor sods who still work, so nothing changes.

We all know of Murphy's, or Sod's Law, one instance of which states that a buttered piece of bread will always land buttered side down. There are various extensions of this. Here are some from an old copy of the 'Daily Mail', plus some others. The Unspeakable law - As soon as you mention something, if it is good, it goes away and if it is bad, it happens. Non reciprocal Law of Expectations- Negative expectations yield negative results: positive expectations yield negative results. Etorre's Observation - The other queue always moves faster. Maier's Law - If the facts don't correspond to theory, they must be disposed of. The n+1 effect - If a person drinks n pints of beer, they will need to go to the toilet n+1 times. The +1 time will interrupt the soundest sleep. Barth's Distinction - There are two types of people. Those who divide people into two types, and those who don't. Xaphod's Conjecture - For every politician's positive, but imaginary, action, there is a real negative reaction. Farber's Fourth Law - Necessity is the mother of strange bedfellows. Newton's Fourth Law - No matter how much you shake it, the last drop falls down your trouser leg. Kirchoff's Fiddle Factor - When experimental data bears no relation to theory, Kirchoff's Fiddle Factor allows data to be computed from theory, providing some uncertainty is added to account for experimental error. O'Toole's commentary on Murphy's Law - Murphy was an optimist ! ----------------------------------------------------------- Oh, about the Channel Isles being a tax haven; this is a popular misconception. Income tax is levied at 20%, plus compulsory health insurance at 5%, on worldwide income. Due to the pathetic allowances against foreign taxation, purporting to be a comprehensive dual taxation agreement, most people end up paying tax in their home country, plus tax in the Channel Isles. You ask anyone there with a UK pension, they will say they are taxed twice.