peterborough

Sorry not posted for ages. it hit me hard when my partner said she would not go out in public with me wearing thin (stiletto heels) which are the heels i really like. Its the way they make you feel when you walk in them.

So since my last post, i have been out many times in heels but only with chunky heels at 3" Warn trainers maybe once or twice.

I still cannot stop thinking about my Trainer stiletto heels and want to go out wearing them so much, its starting to get to me.

20 hours ago, pebblesf said:

Hope all goes well buddy....

OK, well how about if she wanted to go to church in CROCS....That's gotta bother you....

does not bother me what she wares out.

Thanks to you both again for your time.

If she waned to go out  in PJ's, would not bother me at all. She would be the one wearing them.

I'll keep posting any developments and hopefully not all will be that bad.

23 minutes ago, Rick24 said:

peterborough what I mean is that if some family members are throwing personal views about what you wear then you have to draw a line and tell them to stop right there. it's okey if your brother tells you to wear chunky heels around him or not around kids because thats a separate issue and not a personal attack but you need to accept yourself in what you wear. without it you can't move on in life and wearing heels changes nothing. wearing flats or heels your still the same person as before. it's 2021 men wearing heels in public is hardly a big deal now compare that to 20 years ago when the internet was still a small thing with no big communication like we have today meaning that guys who wear heels then didn't have the knowledge like we have now. women need to accept this but they can never sell the idea that heels are there thing why the game has changed and things move forward.

 

I'm, so sorry Rick24, however your response has opend more questions.

Quote

it's okey if your brother tells you to wear chunky heels around him or not around kids because thats a separate issue

Would you mind providing a little more detail on this comment? it would help me to understand from anothers point of view.

I'm struggling how to deal with this and also be fair at the same time.

I start to feel, i wish i could run away and be around people who accept me for me.

I do feel my brother has improved even thoe his strong feelings againts, he is laying down some restrictions. Wither that is fair.

Kids - In is view, he does not want his kids being picked on at school due to his uncel whears heels. I understand part of that in i dont want no harm to come to them at all. its just a pitty the world is so stuck up its arss.

I cant stop thinking about the situration, before the chat with my partner and brother the otherday, i was very happy, lots of confidance with my heels that its taken me ages to build up the confidance to wear my thin heels in public. Something that i have struggled all my life with and  now i feel like shit. knowing that i dont really have acceptce to be who i am totally. a Guy who wears heels and wants the same freedom to wear them as girls do without limits / restrictions.

i'm 40 and want to enjoy life and be happy. I don't feel i can unless i know the people that mean something to me, accepts me without restrictions / judgment.

I don't know if i am being unreaonsable / selfish or if i should just do want i want. I am not hurting anyone. its just shoes....a very nice type of shoe that i so much like and want to wear.

Sorry for all the questions.

33 minutes ago, Rick24 said:

peterborough all guys should wear their heels in public but on their own. meaning your own time. having a partner tagging alone in public with you means your personal space and comfort zone are being invaded. I ditched relationships 11 years ago and why. there's nothing in it for me. I also feel that marriage these days is on it's last legs and that in a few decades time no one will be doing it anymore. starting a family will never die out but marriage it's too materialistc now and celeb culture has made it worse. even gender equalty I feel it's nothing more than window shopping from women. the other problem is peterborough many guys in there early years made too many easy mistakes like having no courage to wear them out in public and having no tough line regarding relationships. if I was to start a relationship tomorrow I would be up front about it and want the truth from her if it would cause a problem in the future and if it does then I would part ways with her from that day on thats a fair policy when starting a relationship. I feel that some of your family members are poking their nose into your business in what you wear and you need to set the record straight with them about it. because my family members no nothing about it why because it's got nothing to do with them I don't intrude in their lives and I want the same favour in return in not intruding in my life. remember peterborough wearing heels won't stop us getting a partener but we hold the same right to have double standards when letting any type of woman into are lives and that means being picky about it then it's justfied.

Thank you so much for your comments.

Could i ask for you to to kindly confirm your meaning about You stated" I feel that some of your family members are poking their nose into your business in what you wear and you need to set the record straight with them about it"

Do you mean by this that i should not wear my heels around them (keeping it private) or should they be treated as shoes and if they make a issue with it then its down to them to deal with it?

My brother is ok with me wearing Chunky heels with a few exceptions "Not to wear them if i have to pick up his kids from School" and where if any of his kids have friends over that does not know about my heels"

My hoping was to have total acceptce so i can be myself 24/7 ( if that is fair, i'm not sure)

I have been on forums about and seen a post about  men controlling a girl in how they dress. for example, if a man told a girl  he does not like a low cut top that she wants to wear out, all the responses seem to suggest, that is controlling and all the responses seem to say they would not listen to their partner and tell them to do one. as in its her body and she choses how to dress and her partner should respect that.

Its so hard,

One part of me says, you live once and you do not know when your time is up so enjoy it while you can. Do what makes you happy while you can. then theres relationships and and family.

I know for sure, my brother would not accept me telling him what to do, but it seems ok the other way around (reinforced by my partner) She does not like family fallouts and if i say to him, no this is me, i'm doing ths no matter what, he would say fine, but your own your own. then i would have my partner on my back having ago at me for causing isssues with family.

5 minutes ago, Cali said:

It's a double standard that most of us have to deal with.

Example:  my daughter does not like my finger or toes nails painted. But she like the polish I have so much that she went out and bought it for herself. She also does like my heels, so the other night I wore my booties with block heels and long jeans to hide them.  First non-skinny jeans I've worn in 6 months.

I think we should be equal, if the girls like Nail Polish and their partner wants to also wear it, why the problem. Double Standards are stupid.

girls can wear what ever they like, inc stuff that men wear and that is acceptable to them. but not the other way around.

45 minutes ago, pebblesf said:

Well, not totally unfair for sure.  Relationships are hard, that is for sure...I wish someone would teach my better half how to "pick his battles".  After awhile, I just tune him out which upsets him even more.  In your case, seems like your partner is getting more restrictive on you than she once was.  Relationships are all about compromise, so the trick is finding a compromise acceptable to you both.  Does she not like how you  look in heels?  Or, is she just to concerned about what others might think?  Time to have a calm conversation with her...

Its all about the way she feels, she does not feel comfortable with me in heels, she never hardly wears heels, always in flats. She said to me, when people hear my heels they look down at her feet and then relise its me in heels as shes wearing flats.

she told me off, as one day she did wear heels and i padded her on the back (like saying well done)

I have said to ger, i want to have the ability when we go out, that i decide what i wear, not to be told, you cant wear them. (Block Heels, i am referring to)

I said, if there is a reason for me not to wear heels, like safty reasons, then fine, i support that, but being told not to wear heels just for the sake of not weairng heels, is not fair.

I want out with my brother for dinener, in my thin heels, and he would not walk with me, held back. when we got to the crossing (roads) he wanted until i crossed before he did. there was 7 of us out walking.

My brother thinks its not right for a man to wear heels and 99% of wormen want a mans man not a man who wears heels. I said what if his son wanted to wear heels, he said he would not allow him.

My partner and i have had a chat and she knows, how much i love my nails and heels and that there is no way i will give that up. I guess time will tell how it plans out. She said that i can wear my thin heels in public just not with her. However, we have been together for 13/14 years now and in that time, we are hardly apart We work together, we go shopping together. I know if i said i'm going out today so i can whear my thin heels, she would be like, "what am i meant to do then"

I also spoke to a close friend about it, he said that he does not care, if i wear heels with him out in public even my thin heels. He said i do have to take other family memebers feelings into consideration. Like if they want like the heels, dont wear them around them etc. But as for the general public, do want makes you happy. ( I do not agree with that, why should i have to please family members) If i said to my brother for example, I'm not going out with you if you wear a black jacket, he will tell me to fuck off.

My Partner also said, that she initally thought the heels was a phase and it would pass, and shes reliased that that's not the case.

i do have a quesiton,

Shoud you let a partner decide what you wear or not?

I'm kind of stuck on this.

I also have my nails painted since 2013 (we been togeaher since 2008) we get used to get our nails done together at a solon and when we moved area, we found someone who is really good and comes to our house and does both our nails.

The other day, she said to me, I would prefer you not to have your nails done and wear heels, but i know you will not listen to me, she got used to the block heels but refuses to let me wear the thin heels in public with her.

She also said that, there will times that she would want me to wear trainers (not any heel)

it does annoy me that wormen can wear what they like but seem so controlling when it comes to men. (yet if i said to her, dont wear that, i would be controlling)

Example.

My Sister-inlaw I asked her whould she let my broher wear heels or have his nails painted if he wanted to and she said NO, no chance. Yet she does what she wants.

I said to my partner, if i cannot wear heels when i wish or keep my nails done which i have done non-stop since 2013 then ill be unhappy just to please her. (I have agreed (not happy) not to wear the thin heels)

Another issue (kind of)
All the family knows about my heels.

The oher day, i was out shopping in heels, and my brother invited us over for dinner. His daugher (11) had a new friend other which did not know about my heels so i was told to take them off.

my parter said, i would have to walk from the car to my brohers house (20 meters) with no shoes on as i did not have any other shes with me.

My stance on that is im an adult why should i go bear foot from the car to his house, like my partner wanted me too. In the end i walked to his house in the heels and took them off at the door step.

I do kind of feel, i cannot be my true self fully.

Am i being unfair / wrong here?

33 minutes ago, pebblesf said:

You look amazing in those boots, the stilettos must take a beating on those roads though...Love you outfits, love wearing my boots and levis.  I just got a new pair of stiletto booties, can't wait to try them out in Phoenix on Monday...

So sorry buddy....But, at least she is alot more accepting than most....You are very lucky...Wear you thicker heels with her and save the stilettos for solo trips....Don't let her upset you with the "not normal" comment...She means no harm, just her inner insecurities coming out....

I would love to make more videos, just don't have the capabilities....Accept when a bootbud is along to help...

Thanks for your support and comments

My parter tells me she does not want me to wear the thin heels in public anymore. She said it’s not normal.

They are easy to walk in.

now at a pub having breakfast in my heels. 

doing some serious hour building.

2 hours ago, mlroseplant said:

I think more of us need to take video. Very, very few have, and I'm among the many. The walk is not bad, not bad at all!

I’m gonna ask my mate to video my walk back  from breakfast to the car. Should be up in a couple of hours.

Here are more videos

http://www.pineway.co.uk/vid1.mp4

http://www.pineway.co.uk/vid2.mp4

http://www.pineway.co.uk/vid3.mp4

http://www.pineway.co.uk/vid4.mp4

http://www.pineway.co.uk/vid5.mp4

Here is a video of me leaving family house at night in my heels,

https://pineway.co.uk/IMG_4616.MOV

I do like the Trainer Heels with the Jeans. No comments at all yesterday.

Today will be fun. Parter and I are going to 4 to 5 large retail shops. Early xmas shopping (excuse to heel)

Hopefully all will go without issue as the Kids will all be out today during the week they are mosty at School.

update

Well I made it 7 hours out in public with my heels. 
 

All I heard was a teenager say someone look at that men in heels and that was it.

Thanks everyone for the contined support and kind words.

Todays outings was with the below jeans / heels.

1) First ever outing in public alone
This was both fun and also a little nervious. my first outing in heels like this even with the classic heel sounds that they make.

a) went to the vets to drop off something for one of our cats
b) Went to get fuel for the car
c) Went to Tesco shopping to pickup some flowers for my partner, she loved them.
 

2) Pub Meal
My Partner, myself and friend went to a pub for lunch

3) Back to the Vets

My Partner, myself, went back to the vets to drop off sample from one of our cats

All 3 outgings where in the above heels with the show on show as per the pic above. No Comments at all i am actually wanting someone to comment now lol.

One thing that does hold me back a bit, when we go for famly meals with my brother, he complains unless i wear

Even then he is always taking the piss. Like "wheres the Dress or Hay sexy" you look stupid, or gay.

My parters mum and dad, dont care and have said i can whear my heels (any) when ever, which i am taken back by. i have been to pubs with them.

I have a male friend who actually Encourages me to puch my limits and if it was not for him, i would not be so advanced as i am today. A true friend for sure.

I'm actually at a point now where i feel so happy that i can be more open and not have to worry so much. Apart from my brother who said im Embarrassing. (he is insecure) i wish he was better.

What i do struggle to understand, i have asked some people what they think and they say "why not, or if that what make you happy" it looks good. then you ask them them if your partner wanted to wear heels, what would your response be and they said No.

that to me is double standard and they are people pleasers.

If i like the look of something i would not care who else wants to do it.

since wearing heels i always thought everyone will notice. wish i had the experence i have now, back in 2017.

I got the bug now for sure and the love for heels. Don't think i will be buying any non-heels anymore lol

Went shopping to Tesco this evening wearing these.

Again from what i could tell not even a single reaction. Tesco was busy.

Loving this freedom.

Well today went to town to get anoher pair of my heels re-helled and went in the heels as per the below picture.

Then went to my brothers Tattoo shop while i was waiting for my shoes to be sorted. His customer (a Lady in her early 50s) noticed my heels and said twice " like your heels" then said, i like diffreant.

then back to down to pick up my shoes. loads of people around and you could hear me coming miles away. from what i could see no reactions / comments.

Even had to stand at cash mechine to get money out and there was a few people haning around who clearly notice but nothing said.

So was a good outting. Hopefully we will go out soon for lunch

Something i have learned within the last 24 hours (mainly today) I actually like the sound of the heels, gives me like extra power to keep doing what i am doing.

When i first went out in heels (public) in 2017, i had a lound pair of boots but the heel was hidden. The noise did not bother me at first but then my parter said they are loud and that put me off for the past 4 years and only wore boots that made no sound until todays outing in Tesco when i had my Stilettos on for the first time in public.

I found the sound of the heels gives me extra drive in my desire to wear heels, so much so that i'm trying to find reasons to go out in public more in heels.

Tonight for exampe, i said to my parter shell we go out for dinner so we did to a local pub. Food and drink was nice.

So  between Stilettos or the pair of boots (block heel) that i have not warn yet. I went with the new Block Heel boots - still make the noise of the heel.

Me back at home

What excuse lol can i come up with tomorow to get out heeling, I said to my parter, we should go out xmas shopping the weekend lol

If i dont say anything, i will be stuck at home.

Thanks again for your comments.

Almost time to go pick my car and ill be in the same heels that i went in this morning. Actually i have not taken them off all day. lol

Not sure why but when i'm in heels, i prefer to be in more busy townes then i do a small village where there is only a few people around.

I would say i'm not 100% confident i do have my feers, however my enjoyment is exceeding the slight confident issue.

My Partner, i would say is not 100% with my choice of shoes, however she no longer fights me and lets me get on with it now. Initally we both and a few upsets and then some days she would not allow me to wear. Now she just lets me get on with it.

I thought she might complain today due to the type of heel, but she said nothing and we got on with shopping at Tescos.

I'm sure you will get better also, I took the decision to always whear some form of heel Min 3" whebn going out in public, unless we are going somewhere where heels would not work. Like Fun Fair recently which is on a large grass field and did not want to get my heels dirty.

If we are going out shopping, dinner, family i will be in heels uptil now the below boot.

I have warn the below to tesco shopping before, just not that often. 2.35" Heel designed for men (hand made)

Thanks for your kind comments VirginHeels and pebblesf means alot to me

for years i would wear a levi Jeans with a 30" Leg, when i first started wearing heels in public, i would wear a 32" Leg to hide the heel. When i told my family i decided i no longer had to hide the heels, so i went down to a 27" Leg jeans this causes the jeans to just sit nicely on top of the boot/ shoe and noot cover the heel at all.

Again been doing that for the past year with the left block heel boot. I found when i was trying to hide the heel, i was always checking to make sure it was hidden. Now that the heels are aways on show, i do not have to try to hide it, i dont bother checking. lol

My Missy Rockz  Heels ( The middle ones) are 8.5cm Heels, i have 5 pairs with one of them a 10cm heel. Still getting used to that extra hight as it does feel odd, the 4" block heel on the right are very easy to walk in. I did walk in London once agian with 27" Jeans on.

Ill post some more pics. One with todays upcoming outing to the BMW Service Centre, and one to show how my 4" Block heels look like with my jeans.

The My Missy Rockz  Heels ( The middle ones) do make the classic heel noise so does the 4" boots on the right.

Todays shoe "Missy Rockz  Heels" to BMW and straight to Tesco's to pick up some shopping

Will let you know how i get on. I'm not taking any other shoes with me so cannot chicken out lol

These are so comfy, I can walk for miles in these.

Wow, it was pissing down really heavy so parked the car in the BMW Car park and had to run (in heels) pic below to the BMW Showroom.

Non eventful, one guy noiced and then looked away

Then went to Tesco with my partner, she was wearing flats lol, no problem at all. Think i have falling in love with these shoes.

just a same it was raining so heavy.

Ok, so first on the left, is my usual boot for going out in public for the past year, never any shoes or boots with no heel.

then today was the second from the left to the pub, and a quick walk with the 3rd from the left

its how the shows make me feel (feet feel) when walking in the two from the right.

I went to be able to wear any type of heel and to anywhere.