aussieheels Posted November 29, 2004 Posted November 29, 2004 Just want to say thank you for this forum and every post on it, and i have finally build up sufficient courage to tell my wife. I know there are many similar posts and I don't want to bore everyone but just want to say thanks. It's been building up for the past 10 years and finally she caught me out when i forgot i was drying a pair of lady's g-strings in the bathroom when she got home.... i just played it down and pretend they were mens (it so obvious they were not) and that they were mine from ages ago and i just felt like wearing it..... that night i decided to come out with the whole truth about my keen interestes in high heels and dressing in feminine/unisex clothing..... she was really great about it however a night have passes and we haven't touched on the topic again... i think i should leave it for a tiny while give her a bit of time and space so she can decide what (if anything) she want to do about it (set ground rules, accept it, and hopefully not leave me). It is a great relieve... as awkward as it was when she found the g-string, i also felt a load off my shoulders and i think that's why i decided to come clean completely.... thanks again for this forum's support....
sendra45 Posted November 29, 2004 Posted November 29, 2004 there is nothing like getting caught to bring the subject out in the open, that is how my wife found out about me and heels give it time, she will be sure to ask and perhaps, if you are lucky help you enjoy your interest even more. best of luck. shoe shopping trips will be even better from now on. Nigel. The angels have the phonebox.
genebujold Posted November 29, 2004 Posted November 29, 2004 I disagree. Don't let it go, but rather, bring it up again and seek resolution. Don't pressure her, though. Problems like these rarely go away on their own, so the time to engage her in a constructive dialogue is now. Good luck, and keep it constructive!
aussieheels Posted November 30, 2004 Author Posted November 30, 2004 I'm not quite sure what to do..... we haven't discussed it again and things somehow seems to be back to normal.... not sure whether she's trying to pretend i never told her or she just want to reassure me that things are ok even after her knowing..... i think i'll give it till this weekend and ask her if she have any thought as to the subject matter...... she was very good about it when i told her and i really think she will understand.... just have to make sure i do not pressure too much about it...... nigel: i did mentioned to her that i love going shopping with her and now she knows why and she replied that she won't feel so guilty from now on about spending too much time in the women clothes and shoe department anymore and we had a laugh.... so the signs are good i think
Jimnj3 Posted November 30, 2004 Posted November 30, 2004 aussieheels, I agree with genebujold. I am in the midst of discussions with my wife about my interest in heel wearing. My only interest is in shoes and this didn't go over well with her at all at first. We can now talk about it without serious words spoken and I am sure discussions have been a big help. I don't dwell on it but from time to time we do talk so go ahead and discuss this with her. It can only help the understanding between you two now that it's out. Good Luck...Jim
aussieheels Posted November 30, 2004 Author Posted November 30, 2004 jim... thanks... i do definitely intend to discuss further with my wife, i'm just concerned that she's not over the shock of finding out (we've been married for 10 years and she had no idea) and she may feel i'm trying to force the issue.... agree totally though, as there's nothing worse than having something hanging unresolved.... or at least get to an understanding..... whatever that turns out to be...
Jimnj3 Posted November 30, 2004 Posted November 30, 2004 aussieheels, Once again good luck! My wife and I have been married for 19 years before she found out and it wasn't pleasent..It is going extremely slow on the acceptance....Jim
highheellover Posted December 1, 2004 Posted December 1, 2004 it will be ok gang. Girls and heels rock.
nhoj62 Posted December 1, 2004 Posted December 1, 2004 aussieheels slowly an gently does it and she will come round, by all means bring it up but play it by ear an if it seems like she does not wont to talk about it then move on to something else and try again later. an ask her if she minds u wearing heels round the house that way she can have a chance of seeing u in them. hope this helps later nhoj62 the higher the boot, the higher the heel, the better the feeling!
sendra45 Posted December 1, 2004 Posted December 1, 2004 She is a woman and your wife, she will be bound to ask you more, but if she does not, then do as the other guys suggest. Nigel. The angels have the phonebox.
Dr. Shoe Posted December 1, 2004 Posted December 1, 2004 I would say that a couple of "offf-the-cuff" comments in a light-hearten vein would do wonders. Things like if she says, "I like her boots," you say, "So do I, I must get some!" then laugh! Graduate footwear designer able to advise and assist on modification and shoe making projects.
Dawn HH Posted December 8, 2004 Posted December 8, 2004 Aussieheels:-) Like the other fellows have said, take things slow and easy with your wife and give her a chance to work this out in her mind. The signs seem to be in your favor. Cheers--- Dawn HH High Heeled Boots Forever!
manus Posted December 8, 2004 Posted December 8, 2004 I think it's better to talk with her and explain your feelings about "your hobby"... If you think this passion is important for you, you can only speak with her... Good luck
aussieheels1 Posted December 9, 2004 Posted December 9, 2004 thank you for all your advice but unfortunately i've chickened out so far to raise the issue again..... it's getting almost back to normal (as we knew it before I told her) and i'm worry that the window to open up discussion is narrowing.... i'll definitely have another chat about it this weekend i think her feeling on the matter at the moment is that as long as i don't turn into a full time 24/7 heels wearer/cross dresser she would be fine..... i've got a feeling that she prefer me to enjoy my hobby my myself rather than sharing the enjoyment with me (i guess it would be hard to enjoy if it is something she isn't comfortable with)... which is a shame cause i really wanted to share all my experiences with her....
aussieheels1 Posted December 9, 2004 Posted December 9, 2004 BTW - my computer crashed and had to format and have lost my password for my aussieheels login and thus have created a second login.... if anyone know how i can use my old login back would be great....
Jimnj3 Posted December 9, 2004 Posted December 9, 2004 aussieheels1, I wish you the best. Since it's out in the open definitly bring it up again but slowly. Your feelings are not going away and it would be great if she would go along but what came as a surprise to her isn't something easy to learn after all those years. I did a similar type surprise as I stated which I feel is no big deal but my wife really went off. As time and talk has happened its easier but she still hasn't agreed to my heel wearing. Maybe someday.. I doubt she has forgotten so go slow but talk again.. Once again, Best wish's... Jim
Dawn HH Posted December 10, 2004 Posted December 10, 2004 Aussieheels1:-) What Jimnj3 says is true, you need to talk this out as nothing will be back to "normal" until this situation is resolved between you and her and this may take some persistance and time. Tread slowly and cautiously, but you need to open the dialog again. Cheers--- Dawn HH High Heeled Boots Forever!
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