ILuvHeels Posted October 28, 2004 Posted October 28, 2004 I've been alone for some time now so I decided to get involved in online dating... I've met one person at the end of August... she seems great but we've only met eachother twice since. So, I don't really know if this is going anywhere. So now I've been contacting and going out on social dates with others I've been meeting online as well. My problem is I don't know if this is right. I haven't been intimate with anyone and I am very faithful.... but at the moment, I'm not "an item" with anyone so, it's ok... right?
Bubba136 Posted October 29, 2004 Posted October 29, 2004 I don't think there is anything wrong with meeting with someone that you met on line. Since you are "alone" and, obviously not involved, you might look at the computer as just another way to meet new people. I believe it is always wise to be vigiliant and get to know the person very well before becoming to involved. Being mentally comfortable in your own mind is the key to wearing heels in public.
JeffM Posted October 29, 2004 Posted October 29, 2004 A close friend of mine met her partner through online dating. She read his profile liked what she read and sent him a kiss. He responded, they emailed each other for a week or so then went for coffee before going out to dinner. They had some problems that had to be sorted out but that has been done, so at the start of this month she moved in with him. They have been seeing each other for the last 18 months. I have seen the change in her, she is one happy gal and I am happy for her. So in my opinion there is definitely nothing wrong with online dating. Jeff
Nova Posted October 29, 2004 Posted October 29, 2004 I don't think you should feel bad about seeing more than one person as long as you're not truly commited to one. You're still trying to find the right one. That may take some trial and error. I sure haven't succeeded yet... 'Jen' If all the world's a stage, I want to operate the trap door.
Laurieheels Posted October 29, 2004 Posted October 29, 2004 Unless you have had a conversation with the first lady about being exclusive, then there's no obligation, no moral issue, no conflict, and thus, you're not bad. When you're single, and looking, the idea is to explore a bit before finding someone you have an intimate connection with. So go on an adventure and meet people, go out, enjopy the moment, and if it works and the frequency increases in seeing one another, then you can move towards something more exclusive.
Dr. Shoe Posted October 29, 2004 Posted October 29, 2004 With any relationship you go through stages: 1. Acquaintance= You don't really know the person but you enjoy their company and/or talking to them but are quite happy to do this with others. You have other acquaintancies too. 2. Friendship= You spend quite a lot of your time with the person on their own and enjoy it. You could stay with them and vice versa. You may have other friends and acquaintances. 3. Agape love= The kind of friendship where you can see right through the person but still enjoy the view. You would do anything for this person but the relationship is still platonic, you could have this kind of relationship with males or females. You might only have about half a dozen friends of this kind in your lifetime. 4. Philos= This is the kind of love that couples talk about when they say that they love each other. This is often a sexually based relationship and is best if it is monogamous. Sometimes this is confused with lust (what a weekend that was ). Graduate footwear designer able to advise and assist on modification and shoe making projects.
PJ Posted October 30, 2004 Posted October 30, 2004 I once had multiple relationships online. But after getting to know them over an 18 month period, I chose to meet only one of them. I explained my decision to the others and we remained online friends. As for the one I met, she is now my steady and only girlfriend. We have been seeing each other over 2 years now. I believe that if two people do not date on a frequent basis, they are free to date others. However, if there is a verbal agreement, or if your love leads to cohabitation, engagement or marriage, then that means you are commiting yourself to just that one person. The considerate thing to do would be to explain your beliefs to the other person to prevent any misunderstandings. click .... click .... click .... The sensual sound of stiletto heels on a hard surface.
Bubba136 Posted October 30, 2004 Posted October 30, 2004 I believe that is what "old fuddy-duddie and less hip, unmodern citizens call "commitment," PJ. Something which a large number of the younger generation are afraid to make. These days its acceptable to a lot of people to live together and engage in all aspects of married life without either one making any sort of "commitment" to each other or to any offspring they might make together. Without "commitment" it is so easy to gather you're dirty underwear and just walk out leaving the other party holding the bag -- with a clear mind and without ever accepting any responsibility because "they never made a "commitment." Being mentally comfortable in your own mind is the key to wearing heels in public.
asdf174 Posted November 1, 2004 Posted November 1, 2004 Heh, at least your out there meeting people. Unlike my pathetic ass. It's all good. ~Arron.
genebujold Posted November 2, 2004 Posted November 2, 2004 Twice in two months is hardly a record... In fact, the mutually-understood implication should be that both of you are free to date others. If you feel uncertain about that, talk to her and share with her your feelings, that you think she is great, but would like a relationship with more frequency, like twice a week, instead of once a month. If she responds favorably, then great - after all, you said she was great. If she's indifferent, then share with her you're going to date others and see how she reacts. If she's ok with that, go for it. If she reacts with possessiveness, clinginess, etc., that's a warning flag, and indicates an underlying control issue (I don't want to date you often, but you can't date anyone else). Go with what's healthy and moral. Be honest. If you find "that someone special," commit to it and don't try to keep two fish on the hook. Good luck!
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