A story about fashion freedom - by SQ

[ShockQueen]

I wrote this the other night and thought it would be cool to post here. I have borrowed some sayings from my friends here, but this is how it turned out. See what you think. Fashion Freedom Begins Anew - by ShockQueen ------------------------------------------- Once upon a time, there was fashion freedom for all. Men and women would make themselves feel better by shopping for wearables, and then mingle with their friends, co-workers, acquaintances, and generally had a really fun time (I think this was back in the 60's, but I could be wrong). After the 70's rage, and people fell into little sub-molds of how they should be, things changed, and I don't mean for the better either. It seems that one day someone (who may as well remain nameless since I can't fathom who would do this) thought that men should appear one way, and one way only, and women should do the same. Here's the kicker to this, and pardon if I sound a bit biased, but I call 'em as I see 'em.....it seems that men will drop a fashion, women pick it up afterwards, and then make it their own - never to be claimed by the males again unless you wish to fall victim to the 'society monster' and face persecution and the like. If the trend were to continue, there would be many possibilities for the females, and virtually none for the males! Something is wrong with that picture folks! What happened to making yourself feel better? What happened to personal expression in your life? Someone dropped a huge heavy ball somewhere and it plugged up the hole where wisdom once spewed forth (get out of that gutter people!). I have come to the conclusion that all of that thinking that was dreamed up in the late 80's and continuing until today has been nothing but a fallacy - that's all! The only gender lines in fashion were those dreamed up by designers and the 'morally upright' as they called themselves. There are no boundaries, so don't for a second believe what you see in the stores! There are no sections, just many many racks! It's like in the Matrix when Keanu Reeves tried to bend the spoon, and the boy sitting before him said "There is no spoon". What smacks me like a large gold brick as being funny, is that when I try a new fashion and it just feels right, and people ask how I can do that! I just tell them that I just decided to do it, and leave it at that. If people have a problem with me, then they don't have to be around me. I found out when I was growing up that if you shatter people's perceptions of who you are, it tends to show just who your real friends are. I lost some cool friends that summer, but the ones that remained I gained even more respect for. I figure it this way - if friends are going to judge you based on physical appearance and nothing more, then they are not as good of friends as you had hoped for. One must be allowed to be themselves, and no one should stand in their way...as long as you are not out to hurt others then there is no fault in it. Come on people....tear down the invisible barriers we have set for ourselves and be free!

[Laurieheels]

Sometimes, people may judge based on their own insecurities. Someone may decide not to be your friend based on what you wear, but it's not actually because that person is objecting to your choice. Maybe there is a psychological barrier for that person, and it becomes an issue of fear. The friend is afraid that your example will intrude on an ideal and break it. Thus your friend might be afraid. After all, if you break the fashion barrier and your friend misinterprets it as something different, then the friend reacts the wrong way. It should not happen, and if it does, then that was not a real friend. However, there are many reasons why someone may decide to stop being a friend. I will not go into detail and provide examples, as they are theoretical and I think the idea is across. The only barrier is one built of guilt, shame and fear. Mostly fear.

[Firefox]

The friend is afraid that your example will intrude on an ideal and break it.

What is an "ideal". A mental block, a card that was dealt to you when you were 3 years old? The ones who are great thinkers are those that can take the cards dealt to them earlier, use them, or add to them ... or discard them.

As for fashion freedom, I look at this way: There was a time, not so long ago, when women were used by men in terms of their place and rights in society. Indeed that still persists in many areas and we should all use our best endeavours to squash it.

As some sort of compensation to this exploitation, women were offered the chance to be on show. To have more fashion choice. They could dress up at night... and be slaves by day. Now we have more equal positions in society, all other things must be more equal too.

Very few people can pretend, purely from an aesthetic standpoint, that the male form will ever be nicer than the female one, but that doesn't mean to say that males shouldn't be given the chance to express themselves in footwear or whatever other accessories they choose.

So I say go for it SQ! The people who would cling to some past ideal will fade with the mists of time and a new generation will embrace the equality we all deserve.

[Charlie]

I think Laurie was getting somewhere with her diagnosis of why a shallow friend may stop being a friend. What I'd like to add to that is that I believe it's largely due to a guilt by association complex. For the more shallow amongst us, the thought of being seen in public with a friend that doesn't comply to the standards of the rest of the herd is likely very scary as there's a fear that the herd may not turn on just the noncompliant person. This kind of person represents a small loss when they choose flight over fight. Charlie

[Laurieheels]

Fox: An ideal is something a person creates. Ideal, meaning, a perfect setting, the right condition to suit that person. An ideal should be personal. it is only a mental block when it has been ascribed on the person by someone else. Ideals are great, if they are the one we create for ourselves in an attempt to aspire to something greater. They are bad when someone else sets the ideal and forces us to live up to it. Charlie: Thank you for your summary of what I was trying to say. Guilty by association. Exactly the point. And only a small loss, as you say. Such people we do not need in our lives.