High Heels and being submissive?

[jenniferhouston1]

Does anyone else here wear heels as part of their submission to their partner? Mark thinks it is important for me to wear heels to "keep me in the right mindset" I agree that heels make me generally more ladylike and docile and sometimes, even needful of an arm to hold onto. I was just wondering if wearing heels has impacted that aspect in anyone's life. I apologize if this should be in another forum. Let me know if I need to repost. Jen

[gary0618]

Jennifer,

You know, thousands and thousands of words have been written on this subject. High heels work on both side of the D/S world. But I will be brief.

My lady will often wear her heels when she is in a submissive mood. The better to serve her master. Or in a more general aspect, when we go out for an evening, she is more dependent on me to be by her side (but not really). You know, a nice light dress or skirt and heels, and a man on her arm to lead the way.

On the other had, she also wears her Highest Heels when she is in a more dominating mood. Just a small change of attire and look out!

Leather skirt or dress, or dark jeans with boots and she is Totally In Control.

I think this is an interesting topic, and would like to see others' responses.

Gary0618

[new_look]

it works both ways i think. for me heels make me taller, i like the lift and change in my posture, i enjoy the stamping sound when i walk and these aspects make me feel much more confident (which you could class in dominant) on the other hand i sometimes get a little embarrased. When in shyer mode the thought of me a bloke in womens shoes doesnt make me feel overly masculine/dominant for the view of others. Also when ive worn my 5.5in stilettos out a few times i found myself holding onto jade a bit so you could also say the restriction can make you submissive. it has been brought up before whether heels themselves should be dom/sub, to which 2 sides exist again. Eg used in for example a dominatrix scenario, the heels are dominant, whereas someone struggling in higher heels than they can cope are controlled and restricted in movement by the heels therefore making them submissive items.

[virginie]

I agree with what gary says. I wear my heels out of submissiveness to my partner (expartner), to please him and to arouse him even. I do definately agree that extremely high heels certainly have a very effective bondage aspect. It makes the woman much more vulnerable I think.

[Dr. Shoe]

If someone can easily handle the (very) high heels then they would probably be dominant. Someone who cannot handle the height would (have to) be reliant on others and hence submissive. This goes some way toward explaining why most doms started out as subs- most subs are "in training". On the other hand a dominatrix riding her slave like a horse because she can't walk properly in her 7" stilettos flies in the face of this theory a bit. She doesn't need to be able to walk because she has servants for that. Isn't that a metaphor of life?

[jenniferhouston1]

We also incorporate another "control" aspect into heel wearing. When we are together, (i.e. he is not at work), I always ask if it is ok to slip my heels off. This little arrangement has made for some interesting times when we have been at the lakehouse with everyone else spontaneously getting comfort and me making silly excuses why I am keeping my heeled sandals on.. lol. In fact he often plays games in that he will stay in a group so I cannot pull him aside and ask to take them off. Just a silly arrangement I suppose, but it reinforces my submissiveness to him. Jen

[womenshoelover]

I love wearing my 5" spiked pumps in the bedroom. I don't know if it is a submissive feeling, but it is a feeling I really like. My wife encourages me to wear them!

[genebujold]

Does anyone else here wear heels as part of their submission to their partner?

Mark thinks it is important for me to wear heels to "keep me in the right mindset" I agree that heels make me generally more ladylike and docile and sometimes, even needful of an arm to hold onto.

I was just wondering if wearing heels has impacted that aspect in anyone's life. I apologize if this should be in another forum. Let me know if I need to repost.

Jen

I seem to recall when I first began wearing them I was uncomfortable with the idea (I began wearing them to solve an an ankle problem), and was perhaps more subdued (not really submissive) with my wife.

But a few months later, after we were both past the awkward stage, things snapped back to normal.

Again, however, the first two dozen times in public I was sweating bullets, then one day I realized, "what's the big deal? No one cares!"

And.... things went back to normal.

[SkyScraper]

Hmm... I call myself High Heeled Sub for a reason But then again... my girlfriend (the dominant person ) also wears high heels when we are doing our thing... hhs

[larry]

Larry Here. I have wondered about this myself. I cruise the web looking for new high heel sites and links. I dont wish to offend any one here so I am trying to choose my words carefully. (It seems to me) that in the Fem Dom Web sites) The previews most often show a lady in some kind of stilleto heel shoes and or boots, Often with fish net or seamed nylons. She's dressed in leather or vinyl or lace. Theres something deeper here than my fetish allowes me to comprehend. Kiss my boots! lick my soles! Suck my heels! ect, ect, It's Real and it's out there. Larry>

[jenniferhouston1]

When I am with my family (largely working independent minded women), they often make comments about me always being in such delicate heels or how they make me look like I am on a parade for Mark's pleasure. especially when in a complementary short or thin materialed dress. However, the same ones who comment on my heels during casual gettogethers are the ones who wear heels to the office. So, I see it going both ways. Jen

[Paul (North-East)]

It's certainly a paradox that heel wearing can go both was. On one hand, speaking from a guys perspective, a woman in heels is deffinitely more feminine and ladylike and has a vunerability factor which is very sexy. On the other hand, a woman can seem much more powerful and in control when wearing heels. I think it boils down to not so much the heels she wears, but how she wears them. I also think the terrain can have a bearing on this. Seeing a girl stuggle across coblestones for example, deffinitely brings out the protective male instinct in me. Love, Paul.

[JinxieKat]

My husband and I use high heels to enhance our Dom/sub relationship. Until recently I was to only wear high heels, they didn't have to be towering, though if we were going out somewhere together it was expected as to enhance my appearance. At work I could wear whatever I wished and at home most of the time I could choose except when he had something in mind If you want to talk in more detail just PM me, I don't want to detailed as it isn't everyone's 'thing'. Jinxie

[genebujold]

I don't want to detailed as it isn't everyone's 'thing'.

Jinxie

You can here, provided you keep it rated PG: http://www.hhplace.org/hhboard/viewforum.php?f=19

[genebujold]

You can here, provided you keep it rated PG-13: http://www.hhplace.org/hhboard/viewforum.php?f=19

[J-Nation]

eh?