honestlty: how would happen to your marriage if your husband

[morpho]

This issue is very very important for some guys including me, i had post a topic in guys forum asking for the best place to hide boots, im explaining in a second reply why i need to hide them, but the feedback i got from this topic made think... the suggestion a got from all of them was to confess my secret to my wife, i dont want to risk the happiness of my life just for the sake of playing and wearing heels selfishly, but i want to know from you girls, even if i know that your passion for shoes could afect a little bit the feedback but i know that in every mind there is a whole different world. What it could be or was your very first (only) reaction if or when your husband tell or told you that he likes to wear higher heel than you do just for fun and for self satisfaction? Risk of poisoning your relationship, and if things were different after and never was the same again? i will appreciate if you can tell us a whole experience we can learn a lot, even can save some marriages, jeje. cheers

[JinxieKat]

I'm most likely the exception not the rule but it wouldn't bother me in the least. Now, to be fair I've been exposed to the idea on these boards and had time to think it over. I've even thought of buying my husband a pair of block heeled thigh high leather boots because I love leather, he has great legs, and I just think it would make for some fun in the bedroom. I mentioned it to him in passing once and he just gave me an odd look and shrugged before making some comment about looking to girly. Heh, I'll just have to surprise him with a pair of boots one day without a pointed toe and block heel. Those won't look girly! But, I digress. Now if the idea had been presented to me before I had been exposed to the idea I'm pretty sure it would be a different story. I wish I could tell you what it would have been. It would not have been a death blow to our marriage, I do know that much. Again though, context counts, we are not a vanilla couple in anyway shape or form. Also I'm very open minded about such things, though I've never met a male that liked womans clothing that was not gay except via text on this board. I think you can take a cue from your wife's outlook on such things that society views as taboo... Gay couples, crossdressing, BDSM and other kinks. True, it is different when something directly affects a person, but how she views taboo things in general will most likely be a guidline on how she will react to your taboo once she is over the shock of it. The hard part for me would be 'Why didn't you tell me sooner'.. but If you are simply upfront about your fear of telling others, at least I assume that is why you haven't told her, then that should help. I hope I've made sence to you and have been some help! JinxieKat

[Mickey68]

Hi Morpho--- Well, if you would like, read my post on A SHORT WEARING STORY. Bubba136 had written to Dawn HH (my husband) & asked him how & when he told me of his crossdressing. I tried to answer that question in my posting. Since we don't know how long you have been married, I would not wait any longer. Be honest with your wife & if she loves you for you she will try to understand & accept whatever you may do in the privacy of your home. DON'T SNEAK AROUND!!! To me if she finds out about your love of HH & wear them & then hides them from her it may make for a serious problem in your marriage. My husband only crossdressed & did not go out side (except for a few Halloween parties) - but since he has found this Forum has started to go out in his boots to a few places with me. Granted his boots SORT OF LOOK male & he wears longer jeans that covers most of the heel but he is finally realizing his dream pf going out in public in heels. The first couple of times he went out with me, I don't know who was more nervous - him or me. But now we just go shopping or whereever & I just hope & pray no one really notices. If they do well so be it - Dawn HH will have to confront it when it happens. Years ago I had to learn to accept his way of life if I wanted our marriage to survive. I am not saying that we have not had some bad times due to his crossdressing but it works out if you give yourselves time. But as I mentioned before DON'T WAIT!!! Good luck to both you & your wife. TOOTLES!!! Mickey68

[Mickey68]

It's me again Morpho--- I must make a correction - if you would start looking for my post that I mentioned in the above post, you won't find it in A SHORT WEARING STORY but you will find it in WHEN DID YOU PEOPLE START WEARING HEELS. Sorry for the error but after I posted to you, I started to look for it and when I couldn't find it under the topic I thought it was I paniced - but Dawn HH to the rescue - so all is well in the household. Again DON"t WAIT & DON'T SNEAK AROUND!!! TOOTLES--- Mickey68

[Bubba136]

Jinxie hit the hammer directly on the thumb when she said:

I think you can take a cue from your wife's outlook on such things that society views as taboo... Gay couples, crossdressing, BDSM and other kinks. True, it is different when something directly affects a person, but how she views taboo things in general will most likely be a guidline on how she will react to your taboo once she is over the shock of it.

More true words have never been spoken. Your wife's views on, what some would describe as "deviant behavior," is a direct indication on how she will view your parctices. The more strongly she derogatorily views these practices the more abhorrently she will view them.

So take note and act accordingly. And, expect her reaction to be directly proportionally to her feelings on other aberrant behaviors.