Personal question for Men who wear heels

[Histiletto]

HI! Annie73 and welcome to the forum! Your first posting is somewhat representative of the present thinking many have concerning men wearing heels. This activity is associated with other alternative lifestyles considered to be socially contemptuous. Society has taught us to accept the stereotypes as the way people should be, but in reality, people don't always fit into these social categories. The premise of your questions seems to assume that men and women are completely different species of humankind with no commonality. The mere fact that men desire to wear heels is one of many examples of the fallacy that men and women can't have similar feelings and wants in common. We have labeled or named references, like: tomboy, crossdresser, sissy, and etc., for people who don't fit into their assigned social boxes, which are more of the examples of having similarities. I maintain the only real difference of men and women is the role and equipment they have in the propagation of the human race. Otherwise, each individual has feelings, desires, abilites, and perspectives that they learn to use as tools to develop their personality. People aren't usually able to know exactly what others are thinking, most of the time. This factor of the unknown was useful in helping to form and support the theory of the gender gap, which society continues to promote to keep each of us in the stereotypical box society made in its disregard for the reality of who people actually are.

[Guest]

Haven't been here for awhile, but the answer to the question that fits me, and possibly many of the others here, is that I consider myself to be a male lesbian. If you google the term, and read the first few answers, including the one by a psychologist, you will find it implies a (possibly) fairly shy individual who may or may not partially crossdress, that is ambivalent towards his gender, who craves the company of women more than men--not just sexually but socially. And who, if he hypothetically were to undergo SRS, he (now a she) would STILL prefer women, sexually and socially. Its not a foreign concept at all. And I didn't even mention Eddie Izzard!

I like it, I'm seeing many of the statements above ticking boxes.

Thanks

Al

[kikepa]

Because you wear heels, do you consider yourself a crossdresser?

The heels by themselves? Not really. I have a couple of jeans skirts I wear inside pretty much 24/7, but I don't consider that crossdressing, either, and this is why. Pants may have been around since the 6th century BCE (horse-riding communities), but they only became manstream a couple hundred years ago. Given that, I find the idea that men "should" or "must" wear pants to be rather absurd.

If you consider yourself a heterosexual crossdresser, and heels are 'merely' your favorite thing, are you only attracted to women who dress as you like to dress?

I wouldn't call myself a crossdresser. Typically, I reserve that term for people who're trying to appear as the opposite of their birth sex. Although the vast majority of people were born either XX or XY, the world of transgenderism is a lot more common than most people might be aware. A number of studies have demonstrated that roughly a quarter of males and females tend to think more like that of the opposite sex, and yes, male/female thinking is definately bi-modal, with few people falling in the middle.

I find myself attracted to women, and it really doesn't matter how they dress, provided it's not "frumpy." Whether a girl wears jeans and a t-shirt or a nice dress doesn't matter, much. What matters is the human being inside.

On another note, why do some women wear only dresses while others wear only pants? Some wear only heels, and others wear only flats? Many women wear both dresses and pants, as well as heels and flats.

Over the years I've developed a casual observation that the more feminine a heel-wearing man tends to be, the more likely he is to wear feminine heels. I think the correlation is somewhat loose, though. Whatever style I wear depends mostly on my mood, but comfort plays a large role, too. During the winter it's usually zippered boots, as my feet get cold. During the summer I'm usually in a pair of sandals.

If you have fantasies regarding being female, when dressed or not, do you fantasize about sexual encounters with men?

I've never fantasized about sexual encounters with men. I'm heterosexual.

If you are in a committed heterosexual relationship, how do your fantasies and dressing affect your relationship with your significant other?

I not in a relationship. I was married for more than a decade, and yes, the heels were a definate strain. She never understood it nor accepted it.

I know these are intrusive questions...

I didn't find your questions intrusive. I hope my answers help you in your own understanding. Being misunderstood isn't much fun! Our world, and all of us in it would be much better off if others simply accepted us as we are. Life's too short, and human relationships are too precious for judgmentalism.

[partyshoes]

Joined and posted on the 15th - checked in on the 17th and never been seen since. Think this girl has done a runner ...!