sohoboot

If that was tactful, I'd hate to see what you would call rude. Had it been me that you did that to, instead of bragging about it here, you'd be sobbing about how I turned the tables on you. Don't get me wrong, I don't look to give people grief, but if someone is going to rag on me (or my friends), they'll walk away wishing they hadn't. Now... you've stated that the sign has gone up since your encounter. Perhaps before that, he didn't know there was an unstated dress code there, perhaps because he had never been there before. He may have made an unintentional mistake and you treated him like he was a peasant disturbing the presence of her majesty, the queen. Again, nobody is any better than anyone else simply because of the clothes they wear... and just because someone is a regular doesn't make them any better than someone visiting the first time. Why did he go home and change? Perhaps he was meeting a couple friends and got there before them. You insulted him to the point where he was embarrassed and didn't want to embarrass his friends. I met my last gf for the first time in a star bucks, someplace I had never been before, so I didn't really know the local protocol. Sure, seasoned veterens knew I didn't fit in with the regulars but not a single one of them, as pretentious as they often are, said boo to me about it. What if he were to actually visit here regularly, as a poster or lurker, and see you bragging about what you did, in view for the whole world to see? Would he be hurt enough then to be deserving of an apology? Now... the results were appropriate for you but you haven't given any consideration to how you made that guy feel. I won't say what he's probably thinking because we don't need another post deleted, but it's very unflattering of you. I've encountered women who were drop dead gorgeous that I wouldn't give the time of day to because, well, their personality and attitude more than negated whatever positives they had in the beauty department.

just to throw in my two cents, because it's really been boiling my blood since I first saw it a couple days ago, the tone of the conversation seems extremely condescending. Not everyone likes dressing up and not everyone is looking for someone who dresses up. My last gf was a skirt and heels type and had no problem with the fact that I generally like to wear shorts (albeit nice shorts) because I get hot too easily. I think the grammar correction was really about as trivial and haughty as someone can get. I'm an occassional freelance writer, and I often cringe at how poor the grammar and vocabulary skills of some people are, but I never put them down for it. It's outright rude. IMO, the more tactful approach to take would be to say "Look, you're simply not my type. Maybe you should try the sports bar." Instead, he was made to look stupid, was told he was stupid (with the comment about explaining it like a 6 year old), told he wasn't good enough, etc... Be glad that he didn't really want to stick up for himself because I know what I would have said to someone who talked to me like that. A college degree, a sharp jacket, a million dollar house, a luxury car, a freshly shaven face or a killer pair of heels doesn't make anyone any better than anyone else. We all have our flaws and we're all different... that's what makes us special. Anyone who outright tells someone that they're below them is simply wrong.... and in fact, IMO, doing so puts that person below the person they're trying to put down.

not only that, but with Halloween being friday, nobody will think twice about what you wore. Last year, my best friend and I were hanging out on Halloween and I noticed a couple guys wearing heels... he didn't even pay any attention (and he normally catches that sort of thing). I hadn't told him about how I like to wear them until a good month or so later, so I didn't really comment on the guys wearing the heels at the time... when I mentioned seeing the couple guys on Halloween, he said he didn't remember; He was completely oblivious to it, despite one of them being a waiter at a place we frequent. I don't have anything to do this year (on a Friday night no less), but I might go out shopping wearing something less chunky and quiet (ie, something I'd like to wear but still get nervous about) since nobody else will care. It'll make the step a little easier

with the first couple friends, I simply wore them when I invited them over to my house. One (female) noticed that my shoes looked "kinda girly" while the other (male) simply thought I had a really snappy pair of dress shoes on. Neither of them had a negative reaction (the girl laughed but got over it pretty quickly and we've since frequently shopped together. She was key into getting me out more often in heels and trying them on in stores. Especially handy that we're the same size). As for my best friend, it happened after these two since I was less sure how he would react given how long we've been close. I wore a VERY modest pair out with him one night, delberately stopping to tie the laces in front of him and stuff. He never even noticed. I ended up pointing them out to him at the end of the night (ok, even then, I still had to spell out exactly what was "abnormal" about it) and he acted as though I simply showed him a new pair of jeans or something. These days, I usually don't hesitate to wear them out with these 3 since they're all pretty supportive of it. In fact, I often get teased a little if I don't wear them now. I've also told a couple people over the net... most didn't care, some thought it was cool, but one younger one (19 year old girl) was a little weirded out by it. She probaby imagined some extreme drag queen type image (even though it's only heels). Overall, I'd say do it in person so they can immediately tell there's nothing weird about it... and even better, don't tell them right away, wear a pair and see if they notice on their own

A couple more:

I was wearing a pair of these under kakhis early today. Even when I was sitting at the food court eating with them completely exposed with hundreds of people around, nobody batted an eye

Lot 26892 from payless

Also, These look like the work boots posted in another thread

my best friend will go up to random women that he doesn't even know and ask if they're 1) wearing a thong and 2) if he can see it. I know in his case, he has a major erotic fixation with them. In the case of the guy you encountered, it seems like it could go either way - he might be turned on with it or he may just be genuinely curious as to what you might wear underneath such an outfit in comparison to a woman

I enjoy the feel of the height and walk - 9 Fashion - an indispensible accessory - 4 For the extra height and confidence. - 7 A way to emphasise my feminine side. - 3 I am sexually stimulated by wearing them - 8 To be more attractive. - 3

when I bought my first pair, I was about 20... and told the saleswoman that it was because of some stupid frat pledge prank. When I've been asked by a couple friends, I normally just tell them that the position is more comfortable for my feet and that they improve my posture, helping my lower back pain. Usually, I find it's the guys that are more inquisitive than the women about it, presumably because the women already know while most of the guys probably have never worn heels, so there's a natural curiosity factor. A couple have asked so many questions that I've asked them if they wanted to try a pair on and they've all kinda sheepishly denied the opportunity. Probably a combination of worrying that they may like it or that it might denigrate their masculinity

don't be too suprised if one is here. Wil Wheaton regularly posts to Slashdot, a open source/technology related news discussion site. Some of them actually are real people behind the scenes (though admittedly, most of them aren't)

let me be the first to congratulate you... I too have a female friend who's the same size that has been very supportive and encouraging. It not only makes it easier to wear them out and to go shopping, but it makes it more fun as well. Keep up the good work - most of the limitations are in your own head. I still get a little unnerved wearing noisy heels out, but I've been progressively doing it more when I get the chance, sometimes not even caring if I have a little heel showing (though still not too much in that department either). All in due time

worst reaction: the (female) manager of a restaurant I frequent noticed a pair of heels I was wearing after the leg of my pants had ridden up while I was sitting and later stood up. She went and whispered to another female worker about them (though I couldn't hear what she said). I've repeatedly returned to the restaurant since wearing heels and neither the manager nor any other employee have ever acted like I wasn't in normal male attire. best reaction: well, really, very few strangers ever seem to notice. I guess that, in and of itself, is a good reaction since it's at least indifferent rather than negative. One time, I went out to the movies with a friend and a couple of his friends. I was wearing some noisier heels (though not excessively, more of a paranoia thing). Even though we walked a significant distance together, more than enough for the noise to register, neither of them (one male, one female) said anything. We went out to eat afterward and we were sitting on barstools at a round table, with me on the most visible spot. I had my heels slung over the cross bar of the stool stool (which, on a side note, I found was somewhat of an erotic experience) and despite the female leaving to go to the bathroom and coming back (with my heels plainly visible), she never said anything. Even afterward, in private, neither of them said anything to my friend that we were with. I think the most surprising reaction was the night I told my best friend. We had been best friends for about 10 years. I had started wearing (male) boots around him more often when we'd go out and one day, I switched over to a fairly benign pair of womens boots when we went out. Despite us walking around for a couple hours and my deliberately bending over a couple times to relace them, he never noticed. After we got home, I told him I was disappointed in him for not noticing anything different since he's normally a hawk when it comes to things like that. I lifted up my pant leg to show him and he still didn't register it so I just blurted it right out. My reaction to his reaction was priceless. His response was something along the lines of "yeah... so if you like them, what's the big deal? It's not any different than you showing me a new shirt that you bought." I expected him to be rather upset and doubting how well he knew me, given that I had hidden it from him for years... and it was the exact opposite. Now, he'll tease me if I don't wear a pair when we go out, though it's a little more rare for me to wear them right now given that I'm not ready for the exposure that would come from wearing them with shorts (and I dislike the heat too much to wear pants in the summer)

I have a pair of Ellie's Vixen. For what I paid for them, I think $27, I can't complain. The heel measures 4.75" on a size 10 US. I don't have any problem walking around in them

I find that most people who aren't confident in their own sexuality are the first to accuse others of being different... And having played football in high school, I can safely vouch that the more a guy brags about the size of his dick and/or demeans another person's manhood, the smaller they actually are (not that I'm gay, you just happen to notice things things when you're all in the same shower after practice). Chances are this kid really isn't narrowminded though, simply ignorant. He's only 14 and doesn't have any real knowledge other than what he's been taught. Because of his age, he certainly doesn't have much experience with the world outside of his comfort zone. Perhaps, on some level, he's jealous because you actually refuse to succumb to the rules while he doesn't think he can. I probably would have brought up the names of some VERY straight guys who've worn heels over the years (bands like Kiss, most of the hair bands of the 80s (even wearing makeup, scarves and other "female" things), how if you go to a hospital, you'll almost always see male doctors (especially surgeons) in rubber clogs, etc). Does he have an ear pierced or anything like that (or even any of his close friends) which you can point out the absurdity of calling you gay for wearing something society deems feminine when he does the same? Ask him if Freddie Mercury or Rob Halford sleeping with lots of women at one point made them straight. Finally, what's so gay about masturbation? 95% of guys masturbate, the other 5% just lie about it. Maybe throw in some medical aspects too... some people have to wear prosthetics to keep their back straight or ankle from twisting. Heels are a cheap way to help keep your posture straight - I'll find that I'm more prone to back aches if I'm wearing sneakers all day rather than heels, simply because they force me to walk more upright rather than slouch. One of my very big enjoyments in life is to debate people, especially those I find ignorant on a given subject (anything from wearing the heels to computers to politics). The only thing that would hold me back if I were you was that he might be too easy of a target.

You pierced yourself? My goodness, I don't think I could do that. Actually, I know I couldn't do that. Yikes! I think I'd call in the professionals for that one, and no mistake.

12 holes currently... 2 that I took out and one to add (the navel again).

It's really not that bad. The top navel didn't hurt much more than pinching the skin on the back of your hand. You feel the clamp and then the needle hits the entrance side and it's over (I gave it about a 2.5 out of 10). Bottom navel was about a 4 because it's an odd position to do on oneself and my skin was tighter. Left nipple was about a 7.5 and the right nipple was about an 8 (since I'm right handed, I didn't have as much leverage as with the left so it went in slower... plus about 2 minutes earlier, I had learned what was coming). The tongue was about on par with the upper navel, barely any pain when I did it, just a slight burning sensation as the muscle striations pulled apart. It did hurt something fierce the next time I woke up (all the blood going to the tongue while laying flat)

I did it partly to distract me from the pain of my suicidal problems and partially to test the limits of my pain threshold. Really, I don't have an attachment to any of the remaining ones, but I do miss the top navel (which is why I'll be redoing it sometime in the next month)

1 pair of thigh high, 4 pairs of knee high, 7 pairs of ankles.

The biggest hurdle to listening to the people around me was to first let myself admit that she might not be the one... Given the time of the year it was happening in (the holidays), I knew it wasn't something I could do until after the new year. Fortunately, my friends kept me around long enough to make the progress I needed As for talking to women... I'm 26 years old and I absolutely freeze when one I'm attracted to comes near (we're talking stare straight forward without moving or speaking). If I'm put into a situation where I have to talk to them on a personal level, I'll begin shaking violently. If I have to talk to them for business or something like that, I'm fine. It only happens when personal issues get involved. As for the double navel, one on the top and one on the bottom. I don't have a pic handy right now. On a side note, around the same time I broke myself out of the suicidalness, I lost the top one due to migration (think it had to do with the pressure of my laptop frequently laying on it as I'd prop it up on my stomach and legs when I was laying down). That was actually my first piercing and it was done expressly for the girl I was suicidal over (she wanted to get hers done but was afraid. If I could do my own, it can't be that bad, right?). So right now, I've only got the bottom one. I've let the scar tissue in the top one settle down over the last 2 months and one of these days, I'll get around to doing it again (I've done all of my piercings myself, ordering sterile needles and such online).

I've been free of my suicidal thoughts since sometime in late january/early february... they weren't shoe related, just related to the woman who did a major mind job on me. Along the way, I've started listening to the people around me and found that pretty much everything she ever did to me was just a lie. She got under my defenses and found out what I was looking for so she could mold herself into that to get what she wanted from me. Since I've accepted that, I've found it easier to move on. However, what she did has really magnified my confidence problem with women (it's a long story that goes back to how I was treated in high school... the girls I liked merely pretended to be my friend so they could use me and mock me behind my back. Because of them, and the women since, I know have a major lack of confidence when it comes to talking to women I'm attracted to). I have found, however, that I'm MUCH more aggressive the few times I've been wearing heels and talked to women I'm attracted to. I think the fact that I'm "getting away" with something like that boosts my confidence in other areas. I also have a couple of non-typical guy piercings, such as a double navel, which I've found women love to talk about and relate to. I still generally keep my heels covered and still get somewhat unnerved if I wear a louder pair, but I'm only capable of doing so much at once I've even begun wearing them around my small rural town here and there. To this date, I've only been noticed once (and that was out in the city, when I was at a restaurant and stood up to find my pant leg had ridden up and wasn't covering the heel). It was by one of the managers and I know she went and told someone else. However, I still go there all the time and haven't ever gotten a look since - perhaps because they have a guy working there whom I spotted in fairly expensive womens boots on Halloween working there (too expensive for a guy who makes $7/hr to blow on a one-use purchase. Given that they were about a size 12, I also doubt he borrowed them from one of the girls).

over the winter, we made it a regular trip to go out shopping. It was quite fun to actually have someone to go with, even with the same size no less. Since telling her, I ended up with 7 more pair. Unfortunately, spring has arrived and neither of us are really that into sandals and such, plus she switched to working the graveyard shift so our schedules have been clashing, so we haven't been out shopping in a while. OTOH, since I've told most of my friends, they pretty much have come to expect me to wear aa pair of boots out. The couple times I haven't, my best friend has chimed right in, asking why I chose to forgo them for the day. With summer almost here and the fact that I almost exclusively wear shorts because I don't like the heat, chances are I won't be wearing them too much for a while. I'm not quite ready to wear a pair of knee high boots with my shorts everywhere

I used to leave mine in my dresser with a layer of clothes over the top. Nobody ever really came into my room, much less looked in the dresser for anything. Sure, there's a risk they'll be discovered but any time you bring something into the house, you face that risk.

I have the same pair in a size 10... they were given to me by my friend who found them to not have enough padding for her feet, though they are fine on mine. They're still for sale, lot 22165. Payless is currently running a buy one, get one half off sale and I highly recommend lot 22927 as well - most comfortable thing I've ever had on my feet.

aries

it's precisely because they're so male looking that made it easy for me to get comfortable wearing them out. Everyone knows that if you act paranoid, people will be suspicious. Once I got used to wearing them out, my choices started getting somewhat more feminine looking. I'm comfortable wearing just about anything out now, as long as they don't make noise - still working on that, like you are

find a pair of modest heels either made out of rubber or with a rubber tip in a fairly masculine style.

This is the pair I used to break myself in... I literally had to spell out to my best friend what they were when I showed him because he couldn't tell (we had spent the night out while I was in him and he didn't notice... when we got back, I point blank showed him and he still couldn't tell)

They make absolutely no noise and look masculine enough that nobody will notice even if you're paranoid. After I built up a little confidence with something like them, I started going with more obvious heels (but still someone masculine looking overall - no pointy toes and the heel still covered). I've gone out in noisy ones a couple times but am still paranoid despite nobody paying attention to the sound... Still working on that. I've now done 4.75" heels with nobody noticing, usually including even my friends that know about it.

I've found that people are simply too self absorbed to care... Men generally don't look down and if they do, it's probably because they too have an interest in footwear. They usually won't say anything, probably because you're not afraid to let your secret out. Women might look down but you'll find that the vast majority find it something to chat about with you. I'm in the middle of a very conservative town and nobody's ever freaked, even some of my friends that I expected to. Sure, I've answered a lot of questions about them, but it's more of them being curious because you're doing something unique. A lot more people will respect you for being yourself than will mock you for being different.

As I've said, I've worn the first and third pair out so far... haven't had a chance to wear the second pair out yet. I find the higher the heel and more feminine the style I wear without even being noticed, the less paranoid I become wearing anything less than that. There are some shoes that I wear that am absolutely confident, without a doubt, that 99.9% of people would never notice. When I finally told my best friend, I wore them out the whole night to see if he would notice - he didn't. We got back to my house and I lifted up my pant leg and pulled my foot into the air and he's still didn't realize it until I told him. To get back on the subject, I was at said woman friend's house last night and was picking on her for her collection, generally, not being girly enough. While I had worn shoes out prior to her, she's definitely made it a lot easier for me to get to wear I am so, it's been nothing but good experiences with her and I sharing our interest.

Lately, I've become much more prolific wearing my shoes out in public now that most of the people closest to me know about it (everyone I've told have accepted it without a thought - despite my being very conservative and living in a very conservative small town). I regularly go shopping with a female friend of mine who wears the same size. Any time of of us gets a new pair, we insist that the other try them on and stuff... It's all good fun. There are pairs that we'll each borrow from each other for a day or two and if it's something we like enough, we'll buy a matching pair. In fact, just today we went shopping since she wanted to buy a pair like my most recent ones (4.25" heel on a size 10US that feels like you're not even wearing anything). I've also been the benefactor of her feet problems a couple times - she'll buy a pair she likes in the store and wear them a couple times only to find out they're uncomfortable for her.

Since I told her about my heel wearing a couple months ago, my collection has grown to 16 pair. She also was the biggest encouragement to me wearing styles which are less male-looking and to tell the rest of my friends.

Just last night, I wore these out for 7 hours... went to the movies and out to dinner afterward in them. Nobody suspected a thing:

She also gave me a dark brown pair of the same style since they bothered her feet

today, she gave me this pair.

Finally, this is the pair she bought today that matches mine (which I've already worn in public a couple times since I got them 2 weeks ago):

Like I said, despite the 4.25" heel height, easily the most comfortable thing I've ever had on my feet. They're also the only pair which someone noticed my heel wearing in (got up out of a booth at a restaurant and my pant leg had ridden up. Woman smiled and told her friend but nothing negative).

It's kind of disappointing that she doesn't have to ask to borrow that pair now... but I guess the good news is we both have a matching pair we can wear at the same time be comfortable in.