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About very_c

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    Comfy Loafer
  1. ilovetights: can you at least post your reccommendations for this little australian?
  2. I started with painting my toe nails....well actually she painted them first. A couple of nights after I had the courage to re-paint them in front of her, I asked her what she thought of me painting my nails. Her response to that wasn't negative so I proceeded to ask her what she would think if I was to wear women's shoes. Be prepared for an avalanche of questions she may have after you tell her. Try to be honest, it will be very hard as the questions she will probably ask you may actually be the same ones you had been asking yourself all your life and still don't yet know the answers to. It took me a long time to tell her about my like of shoes (and inevitably other apparel) even though we had been in a relationship for 10 odd years (give or take...and I am sure a lot of others here are much longer again and still struggling with it all)...don't expect her to accept it fully (or at all) initially. After all, you have had a lot longer to mull over these feelings than she has. Then there is the next problem of public vs. private. I am still going through this with my partner, she isn't comfortable with a public outing yet and I respect her too much to not put her in a situation she isn't comfortable with. And I still haven't worked out how to reveal my other side to friends and family of which i find 10 times more daunting again. I want to be more public about it but need some more courage to just do it. So yeah, I tried something smaller first and tested the waters with that.
  3. Well i tried on a short sleeved dress at the shops, took a picture and then showed her tonight. Apart from saying i have good legs (i also tried on some tight jeans, yay ), she mentioned my shoulders were too buff//broad (how ironic, the problem i was trying to work out). I couldn't find anything else with full sleve, 3/4 sleve or no sleve so wasn't able to take pictures of those styles to see what she thought, but at least she didn't baulk at seeing me in a dress. I think i am happier over the fact that she is being so wonderful towards me than what style of clothing i tried on.
  4. I waxed for the first time the other week. Before that, i had done nothing at all (If I am going to test the waters, I may as well dive straight in), I always wanted to remove it though as I personally never really liked looking hairy in general. I really like the feel and look of them (my legs)...I haven't showed anyone yet however so have no idea what the reaction will be, but I am planning to just shrug it off and and take heelguy's approach ("yeah, i waxed my legs, so what, who cares...") the prickliness of the hair coming back isn't very nice though, but i am guessing (hoping) it has a lot to do with being the first time, having longish hair to start with and generally my skin not being used to the sensation/potentially being too dry.
  5. so of all the threads that I have been reading, a common theme is to work a whole outfit while wearing heels and not to simply focus on the footwear. But i can't help but think that my shoulders would detract from any overall look. Is it better to hide the broad shoulders and if so what works well? or should I simply show them and allow them to be on display. I normally wear long sleeve shirts (loose fitting), but if i couple that with tighter pants (i haven't tried that yet, don't really know what my partner would think), does the whole style go out the window? should I be making the top part be tighter fitting to match the pants? I have a nice pair of thick heeled boots that look classy (in my eyes) and I have worn them with my work pants a few times (and some nice bright shirts my partner got for me), but it isn't an overall look, it's just heeled boots...or maybe it is a look...this is all so new to me. So what do i do for my upper body? understate it as much as possible or try and work to it's obvious characteristics? cheers D
  6. although not quite feminine colours related, it does seem relevant... my partner recently bought me a whole bunch of new shirts for work. But instead of black, grey, tan (i never did white) etc. They were rich and deep colours. red, aqua, blue, purple. (You can find them in Tarocash and Connors here in australia). They definately weren't a 'go with the mainstream' type of shirt but more a 'hey, stuff this normality bull' kind of shirt. The sheer comments from my workmates just because they were not the boring standard colours was strangely complexing. It feels very much like someone bucking the trend of what is expected is quite hard to comprehend for some ingrained in what things should be like instead. Every day i still get a comment about having to wear sunnies cos they are so bright. But it has helped me with the common statement throughout a lot of threads on here. I wear them proudly and confidently as they sure as hell make me feel happier and better about myself, they brighten up my day at the least and frankly that's enough for me. And in return I give it back to them for being boring and stuck in the normality. The latest shirt she has added to my wardrobe is a pink shirt. not the pale salmon but more the rich deep type. I am expecting the inevitable comments but i love all these colours and I am not going to let others keep me down for stepping off the boring bus. So I guess if one wears whatever colour they want to wear confidently, and they are happy with how they feel then that should be all that matters. Now if only i can apply that mentality for myself to wearing heels and a skirt in public and around my friends, then I would be set ...i'll get there, the door is ajar now, so who knows.
  7. hi heelguy, I just read your whole thread from start to end. Fantastic open-ness you have. I can't help but wonder how you are dealing with your friends (one assumes the high school mates). I am terrified of telling my friends and because Adelaide just feels like the smallest town on the planet, i know that on any one trip, there is a high possibility of running into someone i know (these are friends i have had for 10 - 18 years odd and are a big part of my life and are all over South Australia so no one shopping centre could be deemed 'safe'). If you haven't told these people and I assume you catch up with them reasonably regularly, how have you not run into them in some way. Is hiding in the suburbs of Victoria a little easier over there? I get the feeling if you were 'discovered' that you yourself could handle it, but over here...it just feels a little old school with peoples open-ness to difference. Heck I do things now that are so mildly out of norm and get questioned on those things.
  8. It bothers me that although I would have the guts to wear heels publicly and don't care what random strangers think, I am too worried about how those that are close to me (friends and family) would react. I'd like to think they wouldn't care, but by the same token, i can't help thinking that I wouldn't be asked to come to a babecue again.......maybe i should start with a small inconspicuous heel and see what happens...
  9. She appears to have handled it better than I expected. Whether it is a facade or not, I don't know. Although it was something that has been in the back of my mind for a very long time, my feelings had been increasingly plaguing me more and more over the last year or so (semi internal crisis that i was going through life not doing what I really wanted to be doing I guess). What made it all easier was that she recently had been using my toe nails as a test canvas for her new nail polishes. It was the first time I was able to physically show a bit of my feminine side (albeit in a pretty private place). When I re-painted them myself in front of her a few weeks later, her response was not negative....that's when I found' this wonderful site. The stories just inspired me. So one night I just decided to let it out. First I asked what she thought of me painting my nails, and her response was she was fine with it but asked if it was an affront to my masculinity, my response was that it was exactly the opposite and that i liked the feminine trait that the nail polish brought, so much so that I would like to wear high heels. A barrage of questions followed (the usual ones) but all the time she wasn't angry, just curious and she said it was fine if i wanted to get a pair to wear around the house. She has been very encouraging to me to find a pair I like, I did find a pair from a mail order site but they were too small, a 41 which was the biggest size in that style, I think I need a 42. I wore them anyway and showed them to her. Again, she was nothing but supportive of me (although a bit jealous) and made my fear and concern, and worries so much easier to handle. So I am still on the lookout for a nice pair of boots, but not in secret which makes a world of difference. She has made this soo much easier for me than i have ever possibly imangined and i have no idea how lucky I am to have her. incidentally there are just over a million people in Adelaide so 4% would be 40 000 poeple...and still it feels lonely.
  10. I just wanted to say Hi and thanks for this site. It gave me the courage to finally confront my partner and let her know I had a desire to wear high heeled shoes. After reading a lot of your posts, it allowed me to believe that I wasn't strange (well I am a bit) and that I shouldn't keep a deep yearning hidden from someone I care so much about (as it could only get worse I guessed as it ate me up inside). So thanks guys and girls you don't know how much this site has helped to allow me to be more open with my partner.
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