shoobeedo Posted February 28, 2006 Posted February 28, 2006 Please reread what I said. It's not the fact that the parents enjoyed fetishes, it is that fetishes were inappropriately flaunted in front of their children that may have caused problems. Think about how you would feel if YOUR mother were walking around when you were a teenager in the outfits that Missy wears in the pictures. If we are to believe what she and postcode said, she wore these clothes around the house and out to pick up pizza. All of this while she was aware of her son's problems. This isn't a chicken or egg scenario, not what comes first, but a statement that fetishes are for adults to enjoy and adults need to show appropriate behavior in front of their children no matter how they feel about fetishes. Wearing a rubber corset in front of a 13 year old son is questionable behavior. And wearing it in front of a 13 year old boy who had already molested his sister is seriously bad judgment. As for other variables, of course there can be and probably were many. (I did mention that most molestors were molested in my last post. That's a variable.) But having a mother flaunt sexuality in front of teenaged boys certainly causes sexual confusion. Let me ask this---how many of you are parents? And of those who are parents, how many of you walk around in front of your kids in the kind of fetish wear seen in Postcode's photos? I'm not talking about wearing high heels in front of kids, big deal. I'm talking about rubber corsets, thigh highs, leather mini skirts? Think of all the times you have looked at those pix of Missy and cheered her on. Would you have felt differently if you had known that these pix were taken in front of her nine year old son? Her 13 year old son? Her 15 year old son? And her two daughters? That certainly changes the perspective to me. I'm sickened knowing that children were watching. Parents have a duty to protect their children. Would you want that 9 year old reading Playboy? How much worse is seeing Mommy like that?
sscotty727 Posted February 28, 2006 Posted February 28, 2006 shoobeedo, First of all, I am a parent of 3 girls (7, 4, and 6 months) so I understand concerns of what is approriate and not infront of kids. On the specific Missy/Post Office issue, unless you have specific information as to what was and wasn't done in front of their kids, I think it is dangerous to make assumptions, epecially on a public board. Even if you had detailed knowledge, I would be cautious and careful discussing that information on a public website. Now if your talking about things you do and don't do infront of your kids, etc, you made alot of good comments. I also don't think just "shielding" kids from information is the best way to handle the issue (they are going to find out things one way or the other), but a responsbile sit down and talking it out with them is best. For example: Yes it would be very inappropriate for say my wife to wear tight high rubber skirts infront of a young daughter. BUT, also she is going to get exposed SOMEWHERE someone wearing clothes that we would deem not age appropriate. In my opinion, it would be better for me to sit her down and explain why kids her age shouldn't wear outfits like that, how others (especially boys and dirtyminded men) would view her if she wore such outfits. You can't be with your kids 100% of the time, but you can instill information into them that they can use to make their minds up for when you aren't around. Another example, my oldest daughter used to wonder away from us (not too far cause we always had an eye on her, but enough to cause momentary panic) while shopping. At age 2 or 3, she probably isn't going to understand more than "you stay where I can see you". But at age 6, I took her over and showed her the missing kids posters. I then explained how there are bad people in the world that will steal kids and hurt them. This is the reason she needs to stay in vision of us so we can ensure others can't take her. Again, kids need to understand not only what is right and wrong, but why it is right and wrong, depending on her age and her ability to understand. My 2 cents. Scotty
RPMindy Posted February 28, 2006 Posted February 28, 2006 i just came on to check up on things here on this site and ran into this developement here... 1- Scotty, thanks for the point of caution you posted. This is a very public forum and info like this can be super damaging!! 2-Shoebeedo, you said you're a lurker. You've not identified the extent to which you interact with folks on the various forums, but I am inclined to believe that as a lurker you didn't do much interacting with forum members... so your 'inferences' sound dangerous to me 3-I agree that adults need to be mindful of their activities around their children. I 've seen kids who had moms that were bombshells in 5 inch heels at PTA meetings. Those kids were very productive successful members of the community and no harm can be noted in their behaviours (up until we lost touch as adults) 4-if a child sees the proper use of whatever it may be from their parents, they are more likely to make proper decisions later in life. if they know that as a child they shouldn't dress beyond their years (for the aforementioned reasons), they should be also encouraged to find their passions without guilt as adults... the key distinction is that if you make sex and fetishes dirty, they become adults who can get confused by guilt for feeling what they feel. but if they know that in adulthood in a committed relationship (or whatever is your definition of appropriateness) they can explore without guilt with a consenting mature adult, they're good to go, then they have incintive to wait until adulthood (so we hope) 5- in the previous point, what helped me get passed the confusion of my interest in high heels, one woman took the time out of her life to explain to me that it was ok to feel what i feel and that high heels are sexy. there is a time and place to enjoy that fact and as a young teen, it wasn't the time, but in adulthood it would be fine. my folks point of view is that high heels aren't for viewing pleasure and its wrong for a man to find such pleasure. well... after working that out for myself, i like seeing women in high heels.(much more comfy about the matter as an adult than i ever was as a kid). i didn't become a perv or a molester, but that kind input that was appropriately said to me (better than how I typed it) helped me a lot. 6-Shoebeedoo... I don't know where your source of info comes from. I don't know if you got it from Missy or Post Code or from the news. What I do know is what I know. From what I know and was told in confidence, your comments on this thread saddens me a lot. I am aware of the issue tha plagued Missy, based on what she told me in trust. Her version and yours don't quite add up. It's her personal matter, I won't divulge more than this. But I am deeply sadden. the links and connections you left open in your post can get those who don't know Missy to conclude very damaging conclusions. 7- It's a public forum. She is not here to express herself. I understand you're trying to bring a point of caution for those who are raising kids and plan on raisin kids. I feel you could have made your point without singling out Missy. I was an active member on her forum. I've seen almost 99.9% of her posted images. I've chatted with her on how she models them and where her kids are when she's doing those shoots. I've asked her about her dinners too. She was very frank and open with me. Trust me, she took extreme lengths to keep her activities appropriate for the kids that she had. She took enough measures that it reassure me that I can still have fun with my wife (whenever I get married) and not have the kids know that i'm having fun!! you'll have to take my word on the fact she took all the precautions that one can take 8-because it's a public forum... this is all I can say. the lessons to take, one must weigh out the choices they make even as adult. the world will think what it wants. life happens no matter what you want to do with it. outside influences will have to be dealt with. kids are the sum of their genes, their parents, and the outside real world, and t.v. land. any combo of these inputs can yield results you're not anticipating. especially if you throw into the mix a child's personal imagination. 9-Missy did us a favor and kept her limits and asked we respect that. she didn't comply to request that wasn't in her limits. she set the bar on a clean site and how to run it well. I keep that as a treasure. it is however unfortunate that she went through what she did (both what I know and what the public knows) <she's got to deal with what folks think happened as well as what she knows happened> 10-shoebeedoo.. if you want to pm me where you got your info from.. feel free. I won't discuss it anywhere else. I'm taken aback by the version you posted. should it be a news bit of info... then i'm really sad for her and him. if it's another forum... i'l take it with a grain of salt. if you know her personally... let's talk in pm about that too. if you don't want to... that is also fine with me RPM
shoobeedo Posted March 1, 2006 Posted March 1, 2006 I have tried to send a PM to RPMindy, but it won't go through saying that there's no member by that name. Since I know that you EXIST, I'm not sure what the problem is. However, I have evidence to back up everything I've said. RPMindy, if you want to e-mail me privately at shoobeedo@hotmail.com with a private e-mail address, I would be glad to scan and send you proof backing up everything I've said. As for the comments about introducing your children so it won't seem naughty, that may apply to some things and children of certain ages. But would you as a teenaged boy rather be introduced to women in fetishwear from a magazine, or seeing it on Mommy? Teenaged boys have a difficult enough time separating sex from mom. There have been many books written about it. That's why they tend to stay out of the house. Those same breasts that fed them are now sexual and they don't want to be sexual with their mothers. In this case, you have a mother being sexual in front of her boys. Bad idea. It doesn't introduce them to safe, happy fetish world. It makes mom = sex. Just like some people become wired so that violence = sex. Shoobeedo
RPMindy Posted March 2, 2006 Posted March 2, 2006 Hey Shoebeedo. I don't konw what the situation with the pm's are. I get them all the time. but i'll email you and we'll chat that way. as for the mom being the one introducing fetish wear, i do agree that with teen boys, that can be a major issue! I remmeber my teen years. My mom was so 'old school' the concept of a woman being attractive never crossed my mind. when her sister came by once, i was very 'upset' to know from her that women do look hot. The most frustrating part of it is how my dad handled it... but that is another story. When I said age appropriate disclosure, I also meant if the father also had his say in it. i think, but don't have the research to back it up, that if the father had some talk with the son (nothing formal like sitting on the couch to talk about it) using the appropriate media ( like a magazine while working on the car or somethign like that) the idea would be easier for the son to hear and understand. teens already have a bad enough time talking to mom and dad about anything. but i won't digress much today. I do believe there is a point somewhee in a teen boys life that such a conversation can take place. the parent needs to know that teen and figure when is the best time. until i'm a dad myself... i rather not pitch more ideas... i don't have the experience to say much more than my opinion. RPM
RPMindy Posted March 2, 2006 Posted March 2, 2006 Hey Shoebeedo. I don't konw what the situation with the pm's are. I get them all the time. but i'll email you and we'll chat that way. as for the mom being the one introducing fetish wear, i do agree that with teen boys, that can be a major issue! I remmeber my teen years. My mom was so 'old school' the concept of a woman being attractive never crossed my mind. when her sister came by once, i was very 'upset' to know from her that women do look hot. The most frustrating part of it is how my dad handled it... but that is another story. When I said age appropriate disclosure, I also meant if the father also had his say in it. i think, but don't have the research to back it up, that if the father had some talk with the son (nothing formal like sitting on the couch to talk about it) using the appropriate media ( like a magazine while working on the car or somethign like that) the idea would be easier for the son to hear and understand. teens already have a bad enough time talking to mom and dad about anything. but i won't digress much today. I do believe there is a point somewhee in a teen boys life that such a conversation can take place. the parent needs to know that teen and figure when is the best time. until i'm a dad myself... i rather not pitch more ideas... i don't have the experience to say much more than my opinion. RPM
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