Truth in Jest?

[genebujold]

My heeling is secret apart from my gf. When i was about 15, i used to wear some heels round the block in the night. My mate is the same age and lives next door, and his bedroom is on the from of the house like mne. I was always sure that one day he would look out of his window and see me, but hes never said anything.

But there has been a couple of occasions where he has said things, and its made me think, just like you did, 'has that a hidden meaning' under his outward joke.

daz

Reminds me of a very similar incident that occurred with my own neighbor back when I first began wearing heels, over 3 years ago.

I'd only purchased my first pair about 3 months before, and was wearing my second pair, a natural leather toe thong with a tapered heel (tied at the ankle) with slacks nearly the same color as the shoes and my foot.

As a networking consultant in a 24/7 town like Vegas, I keep some really strange hours. So it was about 4am, my wife and I were watching a movie, and I was still a bit tanked from my neighbor's party that ended a couple hours earlier. I suddenly realized I'd never worn heels outside the house, and wondered what it would be like to walk further than from the living room to the bedroom. So, I said to my wife, "Honey, I think I'm going to go for a walk around the block." Laughing, she said, "in those?" I said, "sure, why not? It's four in the morning - who's going to see me?" She laughed again and said, "go for it!"

Well, I walked out the door, down my sidewalk, and turned the corner into my driveway, only to discover my neighbor dragging garbage bags from his party to the street. "Hey, uh, Dave (not his real name) - still up?" "Yeah - the usual mess." "Let me know if you need a hand." "No sweat - I'm almost done - see you tomorrow."

And that was that. He went into his house, and I went for my walk, not another sole in sight.

The very next day, however, we're sharing a beer on my patio talking about the odd behavior of others, when he mentions the transsexual with whom he works, talking about how she took a leave of absense about a two years ago, and came back as a woman. "She's really all right," he said. "I mean, some people twigged a little at first, but six months later no one thought anything of it. Good worker. Nice person."

I was freaking out! Why was he telling me this - had he seen my sandals? Somehow or another I managed to change the subject without dropping my beer.

It wasn't until a year later, that I finally shared with him my heel-wearing and why. "Hey, bud - don't sweat it. Can I get you another beer?" Only then did I have the courage to ask him if he'd seen me early that morning. "You were wearing heels? I totally missed it, man. Are you sure I can't get you another beer?"

Great neighbor!

Bottom line, as someone else mentioned about the twittering teens, there will be a lot of coincidences, and not all, perhaps not even the majority, of it will have anything to do with your wearing heels.

When women began pushing the limits back in the 20's and later in the 60's and 70's, they got quite a few gasps (20's) and stares as they walked down the streets in their fashion choice. Same thing happened when men went through the mohawk phase, and later began wearing earrings. Then there's this whole piercing thing.

Yes, there are still some concerns with respect to business decisions, but society is over the shock value. Have fun! - Wear 'em if you got 'em!

[genebujold]

Yes if they person (man or woman) was wearing inappropriate clothing to work, yes you had a right to take action. I sure hope you talked to them first, maybe given them a warning instead of just canning them.

If my employer had a problem with me wearing them I would have long ago been canned. It has been OVER a month of me wearing the 3" heels and except for the one comment in jest I had, I haven't been taken outside and chastised.

Scotty

Your situation appears to be different than mine. Of my counsultants, one is female (married). Of the men (including myself), four are married, and two are single (of them is gay). I've a bona-fide piercing nut for a receptionist! But all of us are in it for profit-sharing, and all of us are very conservative on the job - it's a joint decision. What everyone does outside of the work environment is their own business.

I've only had to release one employee in this company, and I pulled out all the stops before making my final decision. I hire the best, and they're well worth fighting for. Unfortunately, this one was self-destructing for unknown personal reasons, and there was little I could do. He's since gotten back on the right track and has a good job elsewhere.

And I never fire someone because of "politics." I once had a consultant who made an error that proved expensive to a lucrative client. The client said they'd continue with our firm if I fired the consultant. I chose to keep the consultant as it was the right thing to do, even though we lost the client.

Everyone makes mistakes, and his was an honest mistake. He's also now one of my most dependable consultants.

I make a lot of business decisions for reasons other than money.

[genebujold]

If that is causing rife amoungst you all, fine, so be it. Maybe it is time I quit posting here and move on myself.

Scotty

Hi, Scotty.

No! Don't move on! I value your opinion as much as anyone's around here. Stay!

Bubba - thanks for backing me up, and you brought up a good point, perhaps something I've been remiss for not voicing:

If you can get away with wearing heels at your place of employment, your industry, or in your town - go for it!

And I'm quite happy at the fact that Scotty and Bubba can do that. More power to you! You too, Emery.

Has what I've said over the last few posts cast any clarity on my position?

[genebujold]

Anyway, I think we ALL here should support each other in whatever we do because I think of you all as brothern in the same cause, not enemys on different sides. If I wanted that, I would have gone to the Fashion Forms site, we have enough people there throwing rocks as us. Let's NOT do that here.

Scotty

Agreed!

We're all for the same thing, so it would be ridiculous if we self-destructed!

[sscotty727]

Has what I've said over the last few posts cast any clarity on my position?

Gene,

Yes it has. Maybe I was overly sensitive reading what you originally wrote, I admit I was tired and it was late at night and I probably took it the wrong way.

If your business requires you wear the suit and tie and entertain clients (for example, if I were in Sales, I would wear the full suit get up without heels) I can understand your position. I think there are also other positions where you can get away with it (me for example, I am a "code jockey") and I say if you can then go for it.

If I were in an enviroment more formal, I would probably tone it down a bit too. Like I said, I came to this new customer more conservative and cautious and "tested" the water before going deeper. If I should see signs of danger, I will turn back a bit as well. I would expect my employer to warn me first though before taking any kind of action, I have been there for > 8 years in a senior consulting position with tons of excellent references from customers (we had to fight my last customer to let me go onto the next project, they were fighting to keep me there).

Thanks for clearing up your position, no hard feelings.

Scotty

[genebujold]

Gene,

Thanks for clearing up your position, no hard feelings.

Scotty

No hard feelings whatsoever! Either towards you or anyone else.

By the way, I think it's way cool that your employer lets you wear heels working in a place like that. That takes some guts.

I did some work for one of the contractors at the local base (Nellis AFB), and one of their employees would sometimes wear a long skirt to work, so I know that despite being in the midst of the macho military machine, there's still room to play.