raymond.nl

Tell her. "I've been meaning to tell you this for some time now..." Even my quite conservative mom has been understanding, because no matter what I'll always be her son. PS: ... en in Nederland ligt acceptatie volgens mij hoger dan in andere delen van de wereld, dus hoog tijd voor een "he ma(m) weet je"-gesprek! Hup, niet treuzelen! :-)

... but the reason he dosn't get so much stick for it is:

A) He isn't in the spotlight, almost ever anymore

He's a superstar really...

No, the reason is: because he doesn't care.

I don't care and can wear high heels to high profile clients, my kids' school, etc. I've had had two negative comments in over two years. I think Prince got more.

You are much more likely to be attacked at night on a deserted street.

On a deserted street? By whom?!?

One always hopes one’s guests will be comfortable. But sometimes they don’t do themselves any favours.

As the Queen greeted the first lady of Turkey yesterday, she couldn’t help an admonishing glance at her guest’s six-inch platform shoes.

Hayrunnisa Gul, wife of Turkey’s president, tottered gingerly on to the red carpet as she and her husband arrived for lunch at Buckingham Palace. The Queen, in her usual sensible court shoes, appeared somewhat taken aback by her glamorous guest’s footwear.

Full article: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-2064784/Queen-astonished-Turkish-Presidents-wife-Hayrunnisa-Gul-visits-palace-killer-heels.html

I wish I could add something to that, but I can't. It's all about confidence, it is! If anyone here knows of any other way of getting this point across please step forward, because I fear that too many here still don't fully understand this.

Thanks Gary.

k6ps, does this have anything to do with being Estonian? I've been reading up on the Estonian language, and man that's a weird language!

1. I am software developer in the Air Traffic Control sector

Ditto! Langen by any chance?

1) IT company (~10 people). Founder, architect, programmer all rolled into one. 2) 8 male / 2 female 3) I just did - did not talk about this first. The secretary probably was the first to notice: "Hey! You're wearing high heels!" I remember one awkward moment when a co-worker suddenly noticed I was wearing high heels and the conversation went silent for 5 seconds. 4) Neutral. I did ask my business partners (1 male, 1 female) for permission (sort-of) because I also represent them in a way, but they were pretty cool about it. 5) 7.5 seconds. 6) Two years. 7) 3-4 inch block or tapered heels. Also when visiting clients (nationally or abroad) I wear heels. I have never noticed a single negative reaction. When people make jokes about my heels (some actually quite funny!) they tend to do so in my presence so we can all laugh about it.

I didn't notice, but indeed it's more often girls than boys (although I've had questions from both). I've found that a sincere answer always "settles" the issue.

Google should know better. Absätze = Heels (not paragraphs - silly Google) Darn. Yozz beat me to it by less than a minute!

Though not exactly a FAQ you'll find lots of useful info at http://freespace.virgin.net/firey.fox/tips.htm.

I have no idea how if society is getting more or less tolerant here in the Netherlands towards heeling.

I have not yet been about and about on heels.

Maby some off the other Dutch folks can answers this?

The heels in your avatar can be worn on a daily basis in The Netherlands in public (large city and small villages alike), at work, shopping, dining, etc. without any derision.

Is this more tolerant than, say, 10 years ago? I wouldn't know; I didn't wear heels back then.

Personally, sometimes I still get that initial anxiety about wearing heels.

You?! I honestly wouldn't have guessed.

I've been wearing 3" block and tapered heels now for 2+ (or so) years on a daily basis (home, family, friends, school, office, ...) and it wasn't until a few days ago that I once again had that odd realization that not that many men wear heels on a daily basis.

I was at a big company (client) and noticed how my new heels clicked rather noticeably on the glass floor. Still I've never received negative feedback and am blissfully unaware of people ridiculing me behind my back.

If everybody tolerates me, chances are they will tolerate you just the same.

The sticky balance I haven't figured out yet is do you a) say "to heck with what other people think, I'm going to wear what I like", or try not to make people think you've got some loose screws because you happen to think women's shoes are way more cool than guys' shoes.

Ever since I've adopted the "to heck ..." attitude I've found that more people are sincerely interested in what I think. Sometimes people plainly ask about my loose screws and I tell them that the world would be a better place if more people loosened up!

I love a good puzzle! Unfortunately this one was too easy:

"As a management consultant she was making a big presentation when she noticed her uncomfortable shoe had irritated her foot. She decided there must be a better way to combine pretty shoes with pampered feet."

Google: lady gaga male pumps gives as its first hit "Alejandro", including the colorful description:

... a band of methadone patients traveling the Eastern Bloc with a production of "Cabaret."

Happens every now and then. Kids, especially the younger ones, simply speak their mind. Just the other day when walking my 5 y/o daughter into class one of the younger (newest) kids tapped the teacher on her knee and said in a serious tone of voice: "You know, [name-of-daughter]'s father always wears heels." I couldn't help smiling and told her she had obviously been paying attention! Older kids (always girls) sometimes ask me explicitly why I wear heels (as the 12 y/o designated spokesperson someone else mentioned earlier) and I always tell them: "Because I like them", immediately followed by "Do you?" Never had anything but positive reactions.

Funny; same here. You simple can't wear heels and make a mess of the rest!

will we always be one out of many thousands, or would it be one out of ten, or what?

I'd be surprised if it turned out to be better than 1 in 100. Why? Because it currently is less than 1 in 1000 and acceptance already is very high!

Really, I've been wearing 3+" block and tapered heels running an IT company, visiting large corporate clients, taking the kids to school, visiting friends and family and generally living my life as I've always done. I can't read minds but can't remember openly negative comments. I do remember the many positive ones!

It really, really, really is no - big - deal.

Really.

PS: Excuse me for repeating the same story again and again but can we please put a stop to this acceptance nonsense?

Practically speaking, I think people succeed in new endeavors when that which they seek to succeed in is consistent with their self image, which really exists only in your imagination.

I don't know if it's a good thing or not, but the theory is more than 100 years old: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/New_Thought_Movement.

All I can say is that it works for me, and it does so far beyond any reasonable expectations. Sometimes it's almost embarrassing...

At the moment I can only wear what I can "get away with" from a society point of view. Wearing heels or possibly a skirt to work [...] is totally out of the question in what I do.

And still I wonder. Why is it only I can wear 6-8cm tapered heels to large corporate clients and be a partner in a high-tech company, pitch project proposals, etc. without any problems whatsoever?

I can get away with it because I think I can. (I think.)

I would say that acceptability depends entirely on the status of the social or professional spheres you're moving in.

Also the extent to which a lack of acceptability may effect your life.

As senior partner in an IT-company with large corporate clients ($100M+ revenue) acceptability could be a serious issue. But as it turns out it isn't.

1. I would not wish to be accompanied in public by someone who was likely to be ridiculed.

Amanda! I had not expected this from you. Truth is that most men (and women) think men in heels will be ridiculed. When asking someone about men in heels they think it is silly. But when faced with a man in heels it's hardly ever a big deal.

I have been wearing heels for a few months now and have only had positive comments (some very positive) and neutral remarks (two, I think). I'd say the likelyhood of "ridiculisation" is extremely low.

Yes. Although my personal taste excludes guys wearing extreme heels (red pumps, stiletto crotchboots, etc.) I certainly appreciate guys pushing the limits of acceptability. But girls in heels will always win hands down!

Also from UGG, and with a somewhat high heel:

http://www.bookofjoe.com/images/2007/11/03/hipij.jpg

and

http://www.ugg2u.net/images/UGG%20Caroline/Caroline%20cigar.jpg