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as you may have read, shipping companies are selling cruises real cheap. They're struggling to stay afloat.... The mortgate companies are cutting back on their company cars... the loan a'ranger comes now on horseback.... Pig breeders doing alright... still got both feet in the trough... watchmakers on short time working... clock case makers even worse, they were used to working round the clock... car workers being laid off, it's an economy drive. Managers hope it will steer them to recovery.... As a result of people not buying new cars, breakdown companies expect business to pick up..... Elevator companies say business is up and down.... The other day I said some bakers were going out of business as they had no more dough, well other companies say business is rising.... Car dismantlers not losing money, apparently they're breaking even.... Chocolate makers have introduced a new flavour, now they're making a mint... With people being laid off work, I heard that people are learning to swim like never before. Do anything to keep their heads above water.... Zoos are in trouble. They're having difficulty selling animals. They say it's a bear market.... Mind you, it's odds on, the betting shops are doing okay... The recession has hit the card shops, they're doing a multipurpose card with a birthday/christmas/mothers day/with our condolences tick box option..... Going to bed now... was talking to a bed retailer, used to make king size profits, now down to single figures, but he's got a couple of sleeping directors to cover him.....

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tyre companies, however, aren't convinced.

They say the future is flat....

I thought they said things were rolling along....

Though some companies probably feel like they're going round in circles...

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Youre just takin the pith.... If smitty was hurt, he'd summon lemon aid.... I used to work in a fish canning factory myself too. Boy, was it crowded. We were packed in like sardines. Really disorganised, they'd throw us a fish, we'd catch a mackerel. At least I could wear me 'eels.... The pay was rotten, they were a bunch of sharks.... Sorry to carp on about this, i was done up like a kipper... I had to leave. They played music all the time. Made me 'ard of 'erring.... Turned out, it was the piano tuna....

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We always talk about just being yourself no matter if its green spiked hair or high heels on a man. Here is a joke I recieved in my email from a friend you all might enjoy.

--- OLD PEOPLE

I took my dad to the mall the other day to buy some new shoes.

We decided to grab a bite at the food court. I noticed he was

watching a teenager sitting next to him. The teenager had spiked hair

in all different colors: green, red, orange, and blue.

My dad kept staring at him.

The teenager would look and find him staring every time. When the teen-

ager had enough, he sarcastically asked,

'What's the matter old man, never done anything wild in your life?'

Knowing my Dad, I quickly swallowed my food so that I would not choke on

his response; knowing he would have a good one.

And in classic style, he did not bat an eye in his response...

'Got drunk once and had sex with a peacock. I was just wondering if you were my son. '

real men wear heels

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