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Unhiding my heels

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On 10/8/2019 at 4:52 PM, hiddenheels said:

Was just a tiny bit self-conscious. I knew the heels showed, and anyone looking would recognize something is not quite right...

Here's where you may have a problem. That last word above. If you believe deep down that it is still not "right" for you to wear heels (or women's shoes for that matter), then you're putting a barrier in your own way. Analyze the situation. You're not doing anything wrong. Get that thought out of your mind. You're being YOU. And that's RIGHT!

You're making good progress! Keep up the good work.

Steve

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Congratulations @hiddenheels on a non-eventful trip. I have been flying with heels for 5 years. I usually wear at least a 4 inch heel and most of the time I have to take them off.for security. The only time I didn't wear high heels was when I went to South America and wore some booties with only 2 inch heels. You will find if you act like it is normal - everyday thing then people will react to it that way. Welcome to the  5 Mile High Heel Club.

Edited by Cali
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Congratulations !

i always wear high heels for traveling and never had any trouble.Airports are the most secure and with the easiest surfaces places for that. Like you it has been my first long heeling experience  

But i always take my shoes off at the security. Because I guess they have some metal inside. Never had even a strange glance. 

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Congratulations.  Between June of 2016 thru October 2018; I traveled weekly by air every Monday and rturn on Friday.  Always in 4" or 5" pumps.  During that time frame I taveled to Houston TX,  Los Angeles and Toronto.  Less than 5 negative comments during those years.  Being over 75 years old, it is not necessary to remove shoes when going thru TSA but becasue of high heels I took them off showing off my feet.

Henri

 

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 That's something I want to do, an over-nighter where I wear nothing but heels there & back. Sounds so exhilarating....

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On 10/20/2019 at 10:22 PM, hiddenheels said:

OUTING: Am on a short trip. Yesterday I decided to be adventurous. On my way to the airport, I drove most of the way, parked, and changed into my 4" block light-brown heels, probably .5" platform because the heels can barely be felt. It looks like work-shoes with some chunky heels... That, dark sweater, and jeans that end 1" from the ground. Walked to the train to take me to the airport. At the airport, checked in, and proceeded to go through security. I was hoping hoping that I could walk right through, and noticed that no-one was taking their shoes off (yay!), but alas, after I unpacked my stuff onto the belt, the guy looked at me, and asked me to put my shoes through the xray. Interestingly, I had a non-reaction to this, knelt down and proceeded to take the shoes off as it was the most natural thing. Really didn't give a hoot. Shoes went through xray, on the other side, with a bunch of other people idling by, grabbed by stuff & shoes, put them on, and walked to my gate.

I'm really surprised by my reaction, or lack of, on this. Compared to the embarrasment I felt just a few months ago, I definitely did not expect this level of "change".

In any case, bought some food and drinks, waited around, eventually boarded the plane, and sat, isle seat. The flight was long, 5-6 hours, but was comfy all the way through. I was definitely more self-conscious than usual, but nothing too much. Did my thing, as usual. The flight was uneventful, no-one said anything, although it was impossible not to notice, the whole thing was visible. Flight landed, got off, walked through the airport, got on the train to take me downtown, broad daylight. Then walked to my hotel room (~15 minute walk?), checked in. Wore those heels for a personal record-setting 14-15 hours. It was very satisfying!

More later...

Well done mate. Snap us a picture next time so we can see the look?

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On 10/20/2019 at 2:22 PM, hiddenheels said:

OUTING: Am on a short trip. Yesterday I decided to be adventurous. On my way to the airport, I drove most of the way, parked, and changed into my 4" block light-brown heels, probably .5" platform because the heels can barely be felt. It looks like work-shoes with some chunky heels... That, dark sweater, and jeans that end 1" from the ground. Walked to the train to take me to the airport. At the airport, checked in, and proceeded to go through security. I was hoping hoping that I could walk right through, and noticed that no-one was taking their shoes off (yay!), but alas, after I unpacked my stuff onto the belt, the guy looked at me, and asked me to put my shoes through the xray. Interestingly, I had a non-reaction to this, knelt down and proceeded to take the shoes off as it was the most natural thing. Really didn't give a hoot. Shoes went through xray, on the other side, with a bunch of other people idling by, grabbed by stuff & shoes, put them on, and walked to my gate.

I'm really surprised by my reaction, or lack of, on this. Compared to the embarrasment I felt just a few months ago, I definitely did not expect this level of "change".

In any case, bought some food and drinks, waited around, eventually boarded the plane, and sat, isle seat. The flight was long, 5-6 hours, but was comfy all the way through. I was definitely more self-conscious than usual, but nothing too much. Did my thing, as usual. The flight was uneventful, no-one said anything, although it was impossible not to notice, the whole thing was visible. Flight landed, got off, walked through the airport, got on the train to take me downtown, broad daylight. Then walked to my hotel room (~15 minute walk?), checked in. Wore those heels for a personal record-setting 14-15 hours. It was very satisfying!

More later...

That's an awesome day.  I have done the same flying out of Chicago O'hare and Midway.  Usually in my Sorel wedges or Aldo, Steve Madden or Guess ankle boots all with 4-5" heels!.  I wear leggings to fly all the time so the heels are in plain sight, some compliments, lots of stares, not one negative comment ever.  Even with TSA Precheck there have been a couple of times I had to remove my boots.  I think they have seen it all and then some so a pair of heeled boots is probably nothing.  Good job, keep wearing the heels!!!!!  

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Chesterx and others who are hesitant to wear heels in public.  One thing that I did early on (I have been wearing heels publicly for 20+ years), was to force myself - for lack of a better term - to get over my perceived shyness about being in public, was to take a trip somewhere and only bring gals shoes.  No male backup shoes, none.  But I would bring one pair of gals sandals that did have a bit of a unisex look - for the high heel in public phobia panic attack!  Yes that does happen when you start, but you will get over it wth time.  

It was nerve wracking at first but with time I relaxed and just enjoyed the feeling of being in public in high heels.  Another advantage was that being away from home, there was less likely a chance that I would run into someone I knew.  As has been mentioned by others here, to my surprise, not many folks notice, and even fewer comment.  As a matter of fact it has been at least 3 years or more since anyone has mentioned my heels, and I wear heels out quite often.  

By getting out away from home, I felt less venerable, was able to practice wearing high heels (yes it does take some - not much, but some - practice) and build my confidence.  

Another suggestion, have a story ready in case someone asks why the heck are you wearing high heels?  The (very) few times I have been asked, I tell them that I got the heels to wear to a charity event (true), and enjoyed wearing the shoes, now why let then moulder away in a closet somewhere when they can be used for a good purpose and I mention the name of the charity as well.   I leave out the part about how I have been attracted to gals shoes since I was a kid, a conversation for another time.  ha ha...  

Anyway, my "free" advice, for what it's worth....   Don't hide them heels !!!!   Have fun....   sf

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Agree with everyone, trips in heels are lots of fun!  On my last trip, my “backup shoes” were a different pair of 4”+ heels lol:

Don’t overthink the “story” for wearing heels.  When anyone asks about them, I just say “I like the way they look and feel!”  I have had nothing but positive conversations from that response.  There is a lot of respect these days for people who wear what looks and feels good.  

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Sorry for the short post, and thank you for all the replies/encouragement! I will definitely come back and reply in detail. Just very busy...

UPDATE: After checking into the hotel, rested a bit, and, as I had the evening to myself, wanted to explore the new city a bit. It was still light outside, and I didn't know the neighbourhood at all, the types of sidewalks, etc, so I put the same light-brown 4" chunky heels-that-look-like-work-shoes back on with the long jeans and went exploring a bit. Ended up walking around downtown for about an hour, enjoying the sights and getting to know the neighbourhood. Didn't venture into any stores as I didn't care, but took photos and just enjoyed myself. For the shoes, I did notice a few people glanced, specifically remember one guy (walking with a girl) look down as they passed by me and continue walking away rather amused (possibly because of me, possibly not). I definitely did see some ladies in heels, one specifically who either had a broken heel or couldn't walk in them at all, and another that definitely couldn't walk in them properly but was trying anyway. Those sights actually ended up boosting my own confidence. :) There were looots of tourists around, it was quite crowded.

Got back to the hotel, rested, and a few hours later, when it was dark, ended up going exploring again. This time I wanted to wear my 4.5" not-quite-stiletto boots. Think they look awesome. Found a small grocery store nearby and needed some food, so I ended up walking to the store, going in, buying some small items. Afterwards decided to head back downtown. Ended up walking around downtown again, exploring new streets and checking the sights at night. Quite enjoyed myself. The shoes were great. Three times I was enjoying myself so much I didn't quite watch where I was going and the heels slipped. I didn't trip or anything, but took my confidence down a notch, those cobblestone streets can be challenging. Although it was night, there were still tons of people out. My goal was to eat something from a fast-food place, but at the end my stomach was on a different time-zone so I ended up calling it a day and going back to the hotel. Quite a successful day overall!

Edited by hiddenheels
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Sounds like a great night out buddy!  I do the same thing when laying over at hotels..Usually make two journeys.   And yes, you must be mindful of the terrain when in heels.  You surely don't want to slip/trip/fall, but you also don't want to wreck your nice heels.... Taller block heeled boots are sometimes better for journeys at night.  We have all slipped, surely have done it countless times, hit the floor once also.  The last time I was in Denver, one of the soles of my Zodiac boots gave way when I had about a quarter mile left to get back to the hotel.  Ended up kind of dragging that foot to keep the sole from flopping back, I'm sure people noticed, was just relieved to get back to the room. 

Keep up the great work buddy...D

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UPDATE: Am home... Was busy with work the rest of the trip, and didn't get any chances to wear anything. The first flight more than made up for it though! :) On the way home, was simply too tired to do anything fancy, so decided to just pack in the heels for the trip back. Interestingly enough, as I'm boarding my plane, in a city far far away from home, I hear my name, turn around, and there's a current colleague of mine, coming home from vacation, on the exact same flight. Needless to say, dodged a small bullet there... :) Tired now, but am happy with the way the trip turned out overall.

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Was he wearing heels? :happy:

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Nice going, HiddenHeels.  It took a lot of courage to do what you did on the way out.  Glad the world didn't stop spinning.  Also glad, however, that you dodged that bullet on the way home!

 

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On 10/14/2019 at 6:53 PM, Steve63130 said:

Here's where you may have a problem. That last word above. If you believe deep down that it is still not "right" for you to wear heels (or women's shoes for that matter), then you're putting a barrier in your own way. Analyze the situation. You're not doing anything wrong. Get that thought out of your mind. You're being YOU. And that's RIGHT!

You're making good progress! Keep up the good work.

Steve

Thank you for these words of wisdom. I have started to realize that I feel really comfortable in heels, and am not really looking at them as women's shoes any more. They're "just" shoes... As such, my comfort level has gone up when wearing them out.

---------

OUTING: A few days ago I had a bit of time, and a huge itching, to go someplace in heels. Ended up in my usual outfit, dark blue jeans and a black jacket, but then the debate became the shoes... Which should I wear? Do I feel somewhat shy, in which case maybe my new 4" wedge booties, or a bit riskier and wear a non-wedge heeled boot? At the end, I decided I will wear one of my current favourites. The "bottom" of the boots sort of look like this, but a 4" heel.

image.thumb.png.61dfa42af127e81a597014f418ee4bd3.png

They are super-comfortable, and amazingly I bought them at a 2nd hand shop for really cheap. I feel very stable in them, and think they look great with a pair of dark-blue jeans and black jacket. Ended up doing some self-talk at home, which although it was supposed to be positive in the end is actually quite negative, almost didn't make it out of the house. After a while, I got upset with myself, put my thoughts aside, grabbed my stuff, and drove out. Went to a store as I needed to buy a few things. Was hoping for it to be quiet, but was actually quite busy. Ended up walking around and grabbing the stuff on my list, paying and exiting. Total of 20 minutes maybe of walking around. I honestly don't remember a lot about the visit, was somewhat pre-occupied, and quite "high" (not on drugs, but emotionally due to the heels, if you pardon the pun). Overall I felt very liberated by the time I finished.

 

After the store, on the way home, I stopped by a coffee-shop. Got out, went in, bought a drink for myself, and went outside to sit by the outdoor tables and do a bit of work. I was there maybe about 20 minutes. The jeans stop about 1" off the ground, which hides the heels quite well when walking, but does nothing when sitting. So I'm sitting there, doing some work, drinking, with the heels essentially in full view. I wasn't flaunting it. Was sitting near the drive-through, in plain view of the people pulling up. Also completely visible from inside the coffee-shop. In the past I usually put my backpack against one of my legs, covering the shoes somewhat, but this time I put it onto the chair next to me. So I'm sure the entire bottom of the heels were in plain sight.

It was so liberating. "high" is the best way to describe it (I assume, as I've never done drugs).

Edited by hiddenheels
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5 minutes ago, hiddenheels said:

Thank you for these words of wisdom. I have started to realize that I feel really comfortable in heels, and am not really looking at them as women's shoes any more. They're "just" shoes... As such, my comfort level has gone up when wearing them out.

I switched to only women's shoes about a decade ago because of fit. And now I enjoy the benefits I get from 4 inch heels.  I don't hide the fact that I wear heels, rather I embrace it; I own it. Once you OWN IT, you walk with more confidence which boost your comfort level which gives your more confidence which ....

 

Looks like those booties have rear laces. Real or faux?

 

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Liberating is a great description for sure.  We have all had to fight off "self destructive talk", the important thing is that you overcame it and headed out in your boots.  Wearing great boots publicly is a great "high" for sure buddy....I'm glad you had a great time, and allowed those boots to be a little more exposed.  I too find myself pulling up my levis cuffs a bit while out and about, which is great progress.  Any compliments?

1 minute ago, Cali said:

I switched to only women's shoes about a decade ago because of fit. And now I enjoy the benefits I get from 4 inch heels.  I don't hide the fact that I wear heels, rather I embrace it; I own it. Once you OWN IT, you walk with more confidence which boost your comfort level which gives your more confidence which ....

 

Looks like those booties have rear laces. Real or faux?

 

Well said indeed

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2 hours ago, Cali said:

I switched to only women's shoes about a decade ago because of fit. And now I enjoy the benefits I get from 4 inch heels.  I don't hide the fact that I wear heels, rather I embrace it; I own it. Once you OWN IT, you walk with more confidence which boost your comfort level which gives your more confidence which ....

 

Looks like those booties have rear laces. Real or faux?

 

The boots I wore were like that, not exactly that. Faux leather, goes up to my knees. But under jeans, who knows... :)

 

2 hours ago, pebblesf said:

Liberating is a great description for sure.  We have all had to fight off "self destructive talk", the important thing is that you overcame it and headed out in your boots.  Wearing great boots publicly is a great "high" for sure buddy....I'm glad you had a great time, and allowed those boots to be a little more exposed.  I too find myself pulling up my levis cuffs a bit while out and about, which is great progress.  Any compliments?

Well said indeed

Self-talk sucks. I need to learn never to start it. Regarding compliments, I was somewhat expecting to hear some comment, but heard nothing, positive or negative. So far in all my adventures, I've heard nothing from anyone, just noticed some looks. But hey, I would also look if I noticed a guy wearing something unexpected.

 

---------------

 

As an aside, I've noticed a transition in my own patterns recently. Up until about 2 years ago, I wanted nothing more than to walk out during the night, in places where the chances of meeting anyone were small. About 2 years ago, I started going to parks during daytime where I knew I would probably not meet anyone, and still wanted to take advantage of any opportunity to go out at night in quiet locations. Then something changed about 6 months ago. Now I lost pretty much all desire to go out during the night to secluded places, and much rather go out during daytime and "just do my normal thing" but in my preferred shoes. If the opportunity was there for me to go out during the night, I would prefer to go someplace a bit more busy. Just reflecting on this change... Weird.

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"Weird" or "Growth"?????

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53 minutes ago, Cali said:

"Weird" or "Growth"?????

Definitely GROWTH....

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These days I'm disappointed if I DON'T get noticed. Worked a half day Friday & changed into my velvet platform pumps with a 1" platform & a 5" heel. Stopped off for a late lunch, sat at the bar, walked to the restrooms, talked to the waitress about her lovely long nails, no issues with my shoes at all. Finished my burger & walked to my car, walked back in cause I left my dang jacket behind :roll:. Stopped by CVS for a flu shot, walk through the store to the back & stood there waiting for the folks in line to do there thing. This little old lady finishes her order & starts shuffling by when she looks me in the eyes, looks down at my heels & walks straight up to me and says "Are those stilettos?" "Yes Ma'am" "How do you walk in those?" "I get lots of practice ma'am". She shakes her head & walks off muttering "I dont know how you do it. I would end up breaking my neck..."

Gawd, heels can be soooo much fun sometimes!

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35 minutes ago, chesterx said:

These days I'm disappointed if I DON'T get noticed. Worked a half day Friday & changed into my velvet platform pumps with a 1" platform & a 5" heel. Stopped off for a late lunch, sat at the bar, walked to the restrooms, talked to the waitress about her lovely long nails, no issues with my shoes at all. Finished my burger & walked to my car, walked back in cause I left my dang jacket behind :roll:. Stopped by CVS for a flu shot, walk through the store to the back & stood there waiting for the folks in line to do there thing. This little old lady finishes her order & starts shuffling by when she looks me in the eyes, looks down at my heels & walks straight up to me and says "Are those stilettos?" "Yes Ma'am" "How do you walk in those?" "I get lots of practice ma'am". She shakes her head & walks off muttering "I dont know how you do it. I would end up breaking my neck..."

Gawd, heels can be soooo much fun sometimes!

I was sitting at the bar waiting for a burger. Was chatting with a guy when I “accidentally” bumped his leg with my boot heel.  He looked down and exclaimed.  Nice boots man!   Not much of a compliment but I’ll take it!

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