ljhh

Im back after 6 years, anyone close to Tijuana Mx?

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Hello everyone, I'm LJ. I'm from Tijuana, Mexico I've been a member of this forum for almost 7 years trying to find people like me. Wanna thank whoever came with the idea of this forum for saving my life. I thought I was a freak because I liked women's shoes since I was like 4 y.o. I wanna know how was your first time going out wearing high heels. And some good tips to pass inarvertedly as I wanna go out in high heels hahaha.

 

 

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Hello. I was nervous going out first time (and other times after) in heels. The more you do it the easier it gets. If you mean looking like a women when you say about good tips to pass. I haven't got  any as I wear heels with men's shirt and boot cut jeans.

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Welcome back buddy!  I too, have enjoyed women's boots since I was a kid.  The variety of folks here should convince you that there is nothing "freakish" about enjoying female foot wear, even though society would have us believe just that. 

The first trip out in heels/boots is the toughest, gets easier with every outing.  The best advice is to be sure you are wearing heels/boots that you can walk confidently in and are comfortable.  You surely do not want to draw attention by stumbling around in heels you have yet to master.  I know we all want to strap on 6" stilettos and hit the street, but you want to avoid any negative experiences which can lead to a "heeling setback".  Try taking a drive in modest heels/boots, worn under jeans, then perhaps stop in at convenience store for fuel at night.  Try not to expose your self to situations that will lead to negative feedback, or a difficult heeling situation.  And remember, even though you might feel uneasy, never let it show, set yourself up for success.  I truly believe that the majority of men are intrigued by women's footwear, they just don't have to courage to explore such a "forbidden interest". 

There is a wealth of encouragement here, so take advantage of  friends here.  Post some pictures, ask more questions.   We all look forward to hearing about your first heeling adventure...

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Welcome

good luck with it

start with small steps. Dont try to wear 5 inch red stiletto pumps on first day 

 

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Bienvenidos señor, este lugar es muy bueno por nosotros que gustar llevar tacones.    Perdón me español es horrible.....

Translation:  Welcome sir, this site is very good for us who enjoy wearing high heels....  Excuse me, my spanish is terrible...

have fun...   sf

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Thanks to all of you guys for answering!

I went out last weekend at midnight. I wore a pair of black rounded toe platform booties w/5" stiletto heels, boot cut tight jeans, a tan wool coat, a black turtle neck shirt (to hide my adams apple) and a black wig (didnt wear any make up lol) It's not that I Like women clothes as much as heels, but as Im short and very slim guy (5'8" 135lbs)I think I can pass as a woman and draw less atention or have the complete look haha. It was very hard and I was very very nervous (felt my heart beating very very fast) and hesitated a lot to step out of my car; when I finally went out it was to an atm outside a bank but as soon as I heard any car noise or lights I just went back running to my car haha. I gotta say that this experience was more frightening than exciting, but think that I can Improve, build more confidence, maybe study and practice femenine movements to draw less atention, etc. 

I could not take any photos as I did it without planning it (had the clothes and heels in the trunk just in case I had the guts lol)

What do you guys do when you get spotted by ppl? I can only think of running away! 

 

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Wow, it sounds to me like your going at this the hard way.  I would suggest wearing your booties, jeans coat and turtleneck and stop at that.  Present yourself as a guy in heels.  First check in a full length mirror to be sure you really like the look you are presenting, and if you do then go for it.  If you really like the look you can present it with confidence and people will respect that confidence.

37 minutes ago, ljhh said:

What do you guys do when you get spotted by people?

Nothing.  Maybe a friendly smile and nod.

37 minutes ago, ljhh said:

I Like women clothes as much as heels, but as I'm short and very slim guy (5'8" 135lbs)I think I can pass as a woman and draw less attention or have the complete look haha.

Congratulations if you have the physical makeup to pull of going out as a female but this takes a LOT of work.  Not only do you have to learn to walk in your heels but you have to do everything differently.  You shouldn't avoid makeup as it is the key to looking female.

37 minutes ago, ljhh said:

It was very hard and I was very very nervous (felt my heart beating very very fast) and hesitated a lot to step out of my car;

That step is always the hardest the first time you take it.  It took me time minutes to get out of the car the first time I wore my thigh boots into a restaurant.
 

37 minutes ago, ljhh said:

when I finally went out it was to an atm outside a bank but as soon as I heard any car noise or lights I just went back running to my car haha. I gotta say that this experience was more frightening than exciting, but think that I can Improve, build more confidence

First running in 5" heels isn't a good idea and that kind of sudden movement just draws more attention to yourself.  Your right, the experience should be exciting and not frightening, at least for a while and then the excitement fades because you realize your just wearing your shoes.

As I said earlier the key to going out in heels or as a female is to do it with confidence and this takes practice.

Enjoy your heels.

:wavey:

Edited by Thighbootguy
typo
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Thank you Thighbootguy, 

Maybe I'll go out next weekend without the wig, as you said going out as a female takes a lot of work and I dont know how to use make up (nor plan on spending my money on all of those things haha, I rather use that money to keep buying high heels as I still have some pairs on my wishlist) and I struggle with my walk (I can walk up to 5" platform heels without a problem but not a femenine way). 

I'm gonna start practicing, take videos of myself walking inside the house, because I definitely want to try again (the sensation was like my first time riding a rollercoaster haha), and maybe someday have the guts to go to more "public" places as you did to a restaurant :D

btw Some of my fears of being spotted by drivers is the absurd idea that some driver may be curious and step out to see. Sounds unlikely to happen but can't stop thinking about that. 

 

Edited by ljhh
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4 hours ago, ljhh said:

Maybe I'll go out next weekend without the wig, as you said going out as a female takes a lot of work and I dont know how to use make up (nor plan on spending my money on all of those things haha, I rather use that money to keep buying high heels as I still have some pairs on my wishlist)

Ahh starting from the ground up (shoes) sound like a plan. :penitent:

4 hours ago, ljhh said:

I'm gonna start practicing, take videos of myself walking inside the house, because I definitely want to try again

Good plan.  Make sure the video captures your whole body (like a full length mirror) so you can see your walk and all the other movements and do this dressed as you would going out so you can see the whole image.

Practice, practice, practice and confidence, confidence, confidence.

:wavey:

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On 2/13/2017 at 3:11 AM, ljhh said:

I'm gonna start practicing, take videos of myself walking inside the house, because I definitely want to try again (the sensation was like my first time riding a rollercoaster haha), and maybe someday have the guts to go to more "public" places as you did to a restaurant :D

 

I second the video idea, if you've got the room to really walk naturally. That is the way I learned to walk in heels without looking like a complete idiot. I had no idea how strange I looked until I saw myself on video.

After you make a video of yourself, you can then compare yourself to the many, many videos of women walking in high heels in the style of your choice, and make adjustments to your own walk. Here is one of my favorite walking (well, and then running) videos which influenced my style of walking. It is a very athletic style of walk, which I find quite appealing. I know many people don't like this style of walking, but it's the one I prefer to do and to see in most situations. To each his own. Good luck to you on your journey!

 

Edited by mlroseplant

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20 hours ago, mlroseplant said:

I second the video idea, if you've got the room to really walk naturally. That is the way I learned to walk in heels without looking like a complete idiot. I had no idea how strange I looked until I saw myself on video.

After you make a video of yourself, you can then compare yourself to the many, many videos of women walking in high heels in the style of your choice, and make adjustments to your own walk. Here is one of my favorite walking (well, and then running) videos which influenced my style of walking. It is a very athletic style of walk, which I find quite appealing. I know many people don't like this style of walking, but it's the one I prefer to do and to see in most situations. To each his own. Good luck to you on your journey!

I like that style of walking! Thanks for the tips mlroseplant :D

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So in that vein. On the way to the office this morning took a quick impromptu vid in the car park.

On The Way To Work.mov

 

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Great vid and thanks for sharing.

The look you are presenting is fine. As for the walking, you manage your heels well but, you still walk like a guy.  I have the same problem and I appreciate the difficulty of changing something you have done for your whole life.

My suggestion is to shorten your stride (take smaller steps) and don't land so hard on your leading foot.  Try walking just a little slower and reducing the bounce in your walk.  Compare your video at 00:05-00:09 with the one miroseplant provided at 00:03-00:05.  The gal manages a long stride but her shoulders remain level.

I didn't know you could upload a .mov and an attachment.  Thanks for the idea.

:wavey:

 

Edited by Thighbootguy

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On 2/16/2017 at 8:41 AM, Thighbootguy said:

Great vid and thanks for sharing.

The look you are presenting is fine. As for the walking, you manage your heels well but, you still walk like a guy.  I have the same problem and I appreciate the difficulty of changing something you have done for your whole life.

My suggestion is to shorten your stride (take smaller steps) and don't land so hard on your leading foot.  Try walking just a little slower and reducing the bounce in your walk.  Compare your video at 00:05-00:09 with the one miroseplant provided at 00:03-00:05.  The gal manages a long stride but her shoulders remain level.

I didn't know you could upload a .mov and an attachment.  Thanks for the idea.

:wavey:

 

It is perhaps unfortunate that this discussion is stuck up here in the Introduction section, where traffic is more limited. I find that I still struggle with "walking like a guy," and I even struggle with whether there's anything wrong with that, because after all, I am a guy! I mean, is there a masculine way of walking which still looks graceful while wearing high heels? I don't know, and I certainly haven't found it yet, so I still strive for my feminine ideal example, as shown in the video.

I wish my legs were a bit longer, and straighter. Much of my energy is consumed trying to hide the fact that I have bowed legs. I will never look like the woman in the video, even if I were able to exactly copy every movement, simply because of the way my body is made. But I still look to her for a good example of technique.

While I don't disagree with @Thighbootguy, I think my method of getting to the same result is somewhat different. For one, I hate taking short steps if I'm actually walking from Point A to Point B. I need to get there in a reasonable amount of time, or perhaps there are others in my group who are not wearing heels, and I don't wish to slow them up. I do agree that @aristoc's walk is slightly jarring, but it's certainly nothing horrible. It's a perfectly competent, acceptable walk in some fairly substantial heels. We are nitpicking here, and I don't mind that. It's good to refine, refine, refine, same as we strive for when playing music. My solution to landing heavily on the leading foot is slightly different, however. Rather than slowing things up, I have found, after a lot of experimentation, that the problem is not so much the length of the stride, but rather the biomechanics of the stride. Although it seems counter-intuitive, if you think of propelling each step from the trailing foot, it really lightens up the step. In other words, instead of stretching forward with the leading foot, which can create that sort of stomping/bouncing effect, push off strongly with the trailing foot and let the leading foot glide to its destination naturally.

You can see in the video I shared from 00:01-00:06, due to the lucky accident of the angle of the sun, that the woman is strongly pushing off with the trailing foot on each step. You can see that her trailing foot heel lifts off the ground before the leading foot heel hits the ground in front. I do not have the scientific research to back this up, but I believe this is the secret to a smooth and light, yet extremely athletic (not to mention speedy) walk.

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On 16/2/2017 at 4:36 AM, aristoc said:

So in that vein. On the way to the office this morning took a quick impromptu vid in the car park.

On The Way To Work.mov

 

I think I Walk kinda' like you in High Heels @aristoc:D, Nice combination with the trousers covering half of the heel :) and By the way, I have a jacket like yours, but mine is burgundy. 

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Aristoc:  I think you walk very confidently in those heels and look great...

j

ljhh:  Start slowly buddy.  It is an unrealistic expectation thinking you should be able to go out publicly in a skirt and 5" heels.  It takes time, and confidence, start slowly with more block heeled boots under jeans, and make sure you can walk effortlessly.  I know how you feel, we all do.  But, having a real negative experience can be a real set back emotionally....Don

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3 hours ago, pebblesf said:

Aristoc:  I think you walk very confidently in those heels and look great...

j

ljhh:  Start slowly buddy.  It is an unrealistic expectation thinking you should be able to go out publicly in a skirt and 5" heels.  It takes time, and confidence, start slowly with more block heeled boots under jeans, and make sure you can walk effortlessly.  I know how you feel, we all do.  But, having a real negative experience can be a real set back emotionally....Don

Yep - - - you could blow out a heel, and fall on some concrete and road rash a knee cap - - - - That's OK - we do it again

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On 2/16/2017 at 2:41 PM, Thighbootguy said:

Great vid and thanks for sharing.

The look you are presenting is fine. As for the walking, you manage your heels well but, you still walk like a guy.  I have the same problem and I appreciate the difficulty of changing something you have done for your whole life.

My suggestion is to shorten your stride (take smaller steps) and don't land so hard on your leading foot.  Try walking just a little slower and reducing the bounce in your walk.  Compare your video at 00:05-00:09 with the one miroseplant provided at 00:03-00:05.  The gal manages a long stride but her shoulders remain level.

I didn't know you could upload a .mov and an attachment.  Thanks for the idea.

Aristoc's video is both helpful and impressive.   But, as he is not trying to pass as a woman, surely he is justified (and more at ease) in walking in heels much as a man would?   After all, intentionally adopting a slower walk or a shorter stride or otherwise walking more like a woman is likely to draw more attention (of the wrong type), especially if it becomes something of a mincing caricature.   I wish I could maintain a more natural and masculine walk when I'm out in heels for these reasons.  (Yes, I know: practise, practise, practise ...)

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If one was walking in heels, I wouldn't think one could help but have a shorter stride and walk more slowly. It would just go with the territory whether one was male or female.

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10 hours ago, Shyheels said:

If one was walking in heels, I wouldn't think one could help but have a shorter stride and walk more slowly. It would just go with the territory whether one was male or female.

Not really,  I have to make an effort to shorten my stride and slow down.  I'm getting older so it isn't as much of an issue but I used to take my normal pace even in 5" stilettos.

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11 hours ago, Shyheels said:

If one was walking in heels, I wouldn't think one could help but have a shorter stride and walk more slowly. It would just go with the territory whether one was male or female.

 

1 hour ago, Thighbootguy said:

Not really,  I have to make an effort to shorten my stride and slow down.  I'm getting older so it isn't as much of an issue but I used to take my normal pace even in 5" stilettos.

Surely the point is that one's overall gait (length of stride, speed, foot placement, hip movement etc) will be influenced by one's build and agility and also by the footwear worn - ignoring any issues arising from terrain, gradient or restrictive clothing etc.   A man might well walk as easily and freely (or not) as a woman of equivalent build in the same pair of high heels but most men would have a natural tendency to adopt a longer and faster stride unless, as Tbg suggests, it is deliberately restrained.   But, independently of that, high heels would, for most people of any gender, tend to impose some restraint, as Shyheels says.  I find it hard to accept that Tbg would walk 'naturally' in 5" stilettos in exactly the same way as if he was in flat men's shoes, even if he is totally at ease in the heels through long practice and believes that his normal unchecked gait in them is the same.  

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Biophysics would surely require a modified stride length if one is in high heels. The resulting shaping of one's foot and ankle would preclude taking the same sort of stride as one would in flats. It would have to.

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I don't think anybody is claiming that you can push yourself to the absolute limit and achieve the absolute speed in heels that you can in flats. Most of the time when a person walks around not specifically for the purpose of aerobic exercise, he or she walks substantially slower than the absolute top speed they can achieve. I have spent a lot of time analyzing this for myself. I have come to the conclusion that I don't like walking any faster than about 16 1/2 minutes per mile. It's just plain unpleasant. If I need to go any faster than that, I'd just rather run. I have short legs. My son can walk much faster comfortably, and I told him he's either going to have to slow down, or find another walking partner. This is in athletic shoes.

I find that my normal walking pace for walking across a large parking lot or getting someplace downtown is somewhere in the neighborhood of 19 minutes per mile. Maybe slightly faster if I'm in the mood, maybe slightly slower. This pace is easily achievable in heels of almost any height, depending upon the design, certainly boots. So it's not as if we can pretend that we don't walk differently in heels, but within the normal range of everyday bipedal locomotion, you can come close to doing what you would normally do in flats.

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Interesting subject to which I have never given much thought.  I know for certain that my stride when wearing 6" pumps is noticeably shorter than it is when wearing a pair of sandals with 4" wedge heels, like I did for the most of last summer. When wearing the broader more stable wedge heels, I am not as aware or as careful of where I put my foot as I am when wearing the much higher stiletto heels.  Nevertheless, just wearing high stiletto heels, is bound to change the way you walk.  

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