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Introduction / my short story


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Hello,

I'm male, in my early thirties, in top shape, in a deep and rock-solid relationship with female girlfriend for more than several years. As far as I know I’m straight hetero.

But I like and adore women heels, stockings, panties... and from my early teen age I really love the excitement before and during the act of wearing high heels and other garments. I guess you can say I like crossdressing from time to time. My girlfriend knows about my habit and she tolerates it as long as I have it under control – meaning from time to time. She even encouraged me in buying pair of heels from eBay after I had entrusted her with my lifelong secret. I do not have any need or desire to become woman, and on that subject right now I don’t hold any illusion that I can even pass as a woman since I’m relatively big and in top fitness shape. I have never gone fully fem, wearing heels and lingerie for now feels enough sexy for me… but never say never.

My secret habit started back during early age from pure curiosity and unbelievable excitement when I have had first “pleasure” while wearing my mother’s 3inch leather Italian slingbacks. What started as one time experiment soon became normal and very enjoyable practice then and during all later years when my feet could still fit in those shoes.

Unlike later years, the best thing back then was absolutely zero percent feelings of guilt or shame afterwards. Only thing that mattered was the next pair of heels I would try next day when I’m alone. Like kid in Disneyland I was running from one joyride to next without over-analyzing it, just pure good clean fun. I guess when you are young  you don't waste so much time thinking and pondering is this normal – does everybody do it – what are the neighbors going to say? Mission objective of the day was to have fun, and nothing else mattered. Good times.

Fast forward to today. 

In the last two years since I shared my secret with my prettier-half, I have come to inner peace in my head. I believe I'm not sexual deviant or some weirdo because I enjoy in act that society doesn't approve. Sad thing is society is more likely to approve a drunk who beats up his girl than a weekend guy in heels and stockings. I will continue to do my thing as long as it feels good and doesn’t harm anybody around me.

During the last year I have decided to learn as much as I can about this pleasure habit of mine. I have read majority of books on sexuality, relationships and everything else on that topic that I could get my hands on - not the fantasy stories for horny guys, but the real books with real information and suggestions. The Internet proved to be marvelous source of information if you know what to search for. Now I'm currently in a phase of exploring my sexuality without any guilt monkey on my shoulder. 

So for the next step in my life I would like to explore the real scene out there where real people with real fears and dreams live. That’s why I have joined this community and I'm looking forward in meeting you all active members with similar interest.

M.  

Edited by Tech
Too much information
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Read your story and found it similar to my life story except I am now in my golden years.  Only shared it with wife of 43 years within the last two years.  The interest in heels began at an early age just like yours. ( I will post my story eventually in a couple of  days since I just registered recently.)  I guess my heel fetish started in my early teens and then when I married my lovely wife she satisfied my fetish for heels by wearing them frequently. But as we got older and our bodies changed and she no longer has a professional job, the heels have been kept in the closet although when she gets dressed up she will wear a pair. 

Anyways it has only been during the last couple of years that I sort of built my own collection of heels but I do not wear them in public except for my "Beatle" boots with a two inch heel.   I also have started wearing more adventurous underwear, female and male, having surrendered my white boxers.  Also enjoy pantyhose and stockings from time to time especially in the winter.  They keep my legs warm and help to minimize itching from dry skin.  Oh the joys of growing old. My wife doesn't seem to mind.  No interest in becoming a woman by the way.  I like them too much.  They look so much better in heels than I do although I have received positive comments from the ladies when I participate in the "Walk a Mile in her Shoes" program. 

Well, here we are on this site.  At least we can share how we feel without worrying about how others may perceive us.  Not sure what the big deal is if guys want to have little fun.  Women get to dress and do pretty much whatever they want when it comes to fashion and style, but the guys are pretty much stuck.

Looking forward to more dialogue in the future!

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When I was much younger and had discovered my feelings for heels, I felt like I was the only one out there.  A freak; weirdo!  One day I happened upon a book of R and X rated stories edited by one of the adult magazines.  They had stories about men who were turned on by high heels; by their partner wearing them during sex, "pleasuring themselves" while wearing heels, etc.

This brought a level of comfort to know that I wasn't the only one.  Now, it still wasn't common, but not all that unusual.

I guess this is something we all have to go through.

 

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Thank you both for reply.

For me the feelings of guilt and shame came from confusion and fear of monumental disappointment from my parents. I wasn't afraid that I was weirdo, I was afraid of something much worse and totally stupid now when I think about it.

Let me elaborate:

The world back then had very little or no understanding for homosexuals - today is not so much better but I think its a huge step from two decades ago. I don't have really anything against people based on their sexual orientation. However back then in very early years the logic was very simple for me: if you like wearing high heels than you are probably not straight, and if you are not straight then... hop on the guilt&shame express, next stop adulthood.

Pardon my language, but that was pretty shitty way of thinking but it was the only one I could think of at the time. There was no Internet, no source of information what so ever, even to buy Playboy you had to be 18+ years old. To find out more about this pleasure of mine would mean talking with somebody, and the option of coming out to my parents was out of question. Despite the unconditional love and support that they gave me through all my life, fear of rejection and lack of understanding was too high. So I was pretty much on my own in my head.

I think this whole experience made me better as a person, at least I hope it did. Because I'm not quick to judge or mock other people when I find out about their sexual orientation on some unconventional fetish. Yeah maybe it is funny when you hear that someone you know gets hard on "Farts", but hey you got yours I got mine right?

 

 

 

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Sounds like you are in a good place buddy.  It's is amazing to realize that we are not alone, I think most guys have a thing for sexy women's heels and boots, most just don't have the guts to explore their most secret desires.  I'm glad your girl friend is accepting, I'm sure she likes the way you look in heels as well.  It's amazing how the right pair of heels/gear can actually amplify an already masculine guy's "masculinity".  Hell loving guys come in all shapes sizes and sexual orientations, it is surely not "a gay thing". 

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Hehe, what you said reminds me how she reacted the first time when she saw me in 5inch Pleaser pumps: lips tightly sealed and low mmmm.... escaping her closed mouth. I love her for that.

I agree with you regarding the guys who wont or are afraid of exploring their sexuality on deeper levels even though they have thing for heels or other garments. It took me some time to start exploring my own, and what I found out is: it is continues process with level after level. 

 

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