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How Do People You Know React To Your Heels ?


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I have tried a couple of times to wear heels or other womens shoes in forums where people know me, like work, family and among my neighbours and the reactions have almost always been silence and mostly I have the feeling that people are embarrassed. Does this happen to anyone else or is it just me?

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I can see that happening, and I've avoided wearing heels around family due to that. It became a 10 minute topic when they found out a pair of sneakers I had on we're womens size, even thought they were identical to the men's colors, but I could not find mens size small enough to fit.

As far as friends, most of our friends are in the kink community and have known for years I like heels ;)

(formerly known as "JimC")

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My love of high heel boots is surely a problem for my relationship, nothing much gets said directly. 

Like most others, there is only one or two family members that I might trust to react supportively, maybe that will happen someday soon. 

I haven't shared my booted interests with anyone at work, although they have seen me in high heel boots on layovers, just didn't realize it or perhaps chose not to say anything. 

My interests on only shared with fellow bootbuds, very few of which are close to home.

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Like the above posts, generally my heeling has been met with silence and tacit approval.  Most of the family who know I wear gals shoes are used to it and have no reason to comment.  Once in a while I will get complimented on my shoes.  My father-in-law used to make a comment from time to time - usually after a few drinks - about how his so-in-law (me), wears high heels, then he would laugh about it in a fun way.  I don't think he really cared, he was just having fun with me.    sf

"Why should girls have all the fun!!"

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Without exception all family and most friends have been positive. I guess i hang with a pretty liberal bunch and perhaps because i dress fully femme its more accepted? I don't know .

 

The few negative or semi-negative reactions i have had over the years, have usually been questions like why would you want to? What's wrong with being a traditional guy? Aren't you afraid people will make various conclusions about you? Valid questions if asked in the right spirit perhaps.

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Outside of kink/BDSM circles where anything goes I wear quite conservative heels when out and about. I don't wear heels all the time, just when I feel like it. One of my favourites is the Doc Martens "Una" clog which has an approx 4" heel and 1" platform. http://images2.confidentielles.fr/dl/base_photos/4/0/0/2/22/224002.jpg My GF likes them. Her 20something year old daughter loves them and wants a pair herself. Recently I wore them to a fairly posh 70th birthday party along with leather trousers, a colourful shirt and tie and a smart jacket. GF's daughter thought I looked great and took this photo which unfortunately doesn't show the shoes very well. They were fully visible when I was sitting. Nobody said anything at the party but I thought I saw a few people sneaking glances at both trousers and shoes.

 

post-1248-0-09884800-1428076760_thumb.jp

 

Other pairs I wear out and about are black Next ankle boots with 2.75" heel. Also a pair of Hush Puppies ankle boots with 2.75" wedge heel. This last pair is utterly stealth, you'd really have to take a careful look to realise that these are heels. I also have a vintage pair of patent high ankle/low calf boots with just under 2" heel. These are genuine men's boots from the 1970s, I've had them since new. They're feeling a little fragile now so I don't wear them very often.

 

I've not worn my avatar shoes out and about and am unlikely to do so. One somewhat rough and ready rule about my wearing heels out and about is that if a woman wearing them would get noticed as wearing exceptional heels then I probably wouldn't. I have no wish to wear high stiletto pumps out and about (or any pumps for that matter, just doesn't interest me) nor thigh high boots though if that's what you like to wear then that's great.

 

 

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First I have to ask how are you dressing.

If you are wearing 4 inch spike boots with your pants tucked in, then yea I can see their point. Or if you are wearing hi heel sandals and your toes are painted, you have to expect that reaction.

I wear heels every day. All some sort of boot. So the majority don't look too feminine. I think I have had 2 guys at work say something. One asked kind of in front of someone else and just asked to talk when no one was around. It never came up again

Some of the other guys that I let them show out right go to lunch with me. I have not noticed any of them acting like they don't want to be seen with me.

I have worn heels around one of my brothers some and he has not said anything. When we were all on vacation together I had on some low heeled shoes that look real Masculine and my other brother said something like do I have my heels on. So I assume my other brother has told him. That's all that has been said about it.

I try my best not to put other people in a situation that would make them uncomfortable. Especially with woman. I don't want them to feel scared like I am some kind of rapists or killer.

I wear boots with jeans that cover the heel.

I have some shoes that draw more attention, like what I have had on all week, so I try not to wear them depending on the situation.

I went to my daughter's horse show for college. I did not wear heels because I was around her friends all day. Now I have worn heels around her and out with her to other places.

Don't be surprised when people act embarrassed or freaked out around you. "We" are unusual. If I saw myself I would probably point and whisper to my wife, look at that.

Choose your footwear to the people you are going to be around.

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Like the above posts, generally my heeling has been met with silence and tacit approval. Most of the family who know I wear gals shoes are used to it and have no reason to comment. Once in a while I will get complimented on my shoes. My father-in-law used to make a comment from time to time - usually after a few drinks - about how his so-in-law (me), wears high heels, then he would laugh about it in a fun way. I don't think he really cared, he was just having fun with me. sf
I think I would actually some lighthearted comments instead of total silence. I was at a meeting with my neighbours (like a tennants meeting) wearing my blue suede 3" pumps and it wasn't until we were about to go home until someone said "What the hell are you wearing?" and I just responded that i just wore whatever I felt like and that was it. Way better than awkward silence.
First I have to ask how are you dressing. If you are wearing 4 inch spike boots with your pants tucked in, then yea I can see their point. Or if you are wearing hi heel sandals and your toes are painted, you have to expect that reaction. I wear heels every day. All some sort of boot. So the majority don't look too feminine. I think I have had 2 guys at work say something. One asked kind of in front of someone else and just asked to talk when no one was around. It never came up again Some of the other guys that I let them show out right go to lunch with me. I have not noticed any of them acting like they don't want to be seen with me. I have worn heels around one of my brothers some and he has not said anything. When we were all on vacation together I had on some low heeled shoes that look real Masculine and my other brother said something like do I have my heels on. So I assume my other brother has told him. That's all that has been said about it. I try my best not to put other people in a situation that would make them uncomfortable. Especially with woman. I don't want them to feel scared like I am some kind of rapists or killer. I wear boots with jeans that cover the heel. I have some shoes that draw more attention, like what I have had on all week, so I try not to wear them depending on the situation. I went to my daughter's horse show for college. I did not wear heels because I was around her friends all day. Now I have worn heels around her and out with her to other places. Don't be surprised when people act embarrassed or freaked out around you. "We" are unusual. If I saw myself I would probably point and whisper to my wife, look at that. Choose your footwear to the people you are going to be around.
Thanks for your comment. What I wear is far from masculine. I've worn womens boots to work, wedges and other heeled shoes with the family. With my mom and my niece I've worn stilletto heels and my mom sometimes why I don't with the rest of the family, but I it seems like they're all uncomfortable with it. Judging from responses it's fairly normal.
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I think it depends what heels you wear and how you present yourself. If you're a big, stocky guy, or short but stout, wearing stilettos is going to look odd, same as on a woman of identical proportions. If you're skinny or at least slim, then you can get away with it. I'm stocky. I'm quite happy with block heels or tapered stacked heels, but not too thin and not too high. A 3/4 inch platform is fine. I like sandals a lot and I wear nail polish on both toes and fingers. I usually wear sheer hosiery in warmer weather or opaque tights in cooler weather. I wear with confidence and family and friends see me. I'm still me. I still have the same friends. My family loves me. And wearing heels, like SF remarked, is often the subject of humor and joking. And I'm usually the one who brings it up! I love my family and friends, but I love my hobby, too, so I try to wear heels in their presence whenever it's appropriate.

 

Steve

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A few female friends know I like heels, and I wear them around them, my other friends I won't and won't around my family.

A few female friends know I like heels, and I wear them around them, my other friends I won't and won't around my family.

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I have found that people I know react to me exactly the same as they did before I started wearing heels publicly, which was nearly 3 years ago. But then, I've always been a little bit strange to begin with, so I guess people are used to it.

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"Oh wow! They are the coolest shoes in the history of shoes!" Said by a Starbucks barista yesterday after she caught sight of my red suede pumps. 

 

I had been pretty selective who knows I wear heels, but lately I've pretty much quit worrying who knows. A couple of male friends kinda rolled their eyes and made a snarky comment when they found out, but only the once and our relationships are the same now as they were before. Female friends were all positive all the time. I figured that true friends aren't going to have a problem, and people who aren't in my circle of friends or family don't really matter. I just try to have a generally well thought out appearance, whether I'm in traditional mens shoes or heels of some kind. 

 

I do tend to be careful where I wear heels and other female fashion out and about though. I live in a rural location, so I typically go to the nearest larger town when I'm heeling. I figure that I'm more anonymous over there than in my current home town. A while ago I was over there wearing an ankle-length animal print skirt and nude pumps in otherwise male guise, and no-one looked twice at me.

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First I have to ask how are you dressing.  If you are wearing 4 inch spike boots with your pants tucked in, then yea I can see their point. Or if you are wearing hi heel sandals and your toes are painted, you have to expect that reaction.  I wear heels every day. All some sort of boot. So the majority don't look too feminine... I try my best not to put other people in a situation that would make them uncomfortable... I wear boots with jeans that cover the heel.  I have some shoes that draw more attention, like what I have had on all week, so I try not to wear them depending on the situation.  I went to my daughter's horse show for college. I did not wear heels because I was around her friends all day. Now I have worn heels around her and out with her to other places.  Don't be surprised when people act embarrassed or freaked out around you. "We" are unusual. If I saw myself I would probably point and whisper to my wife, look at that.  Choose your footwear to the people you are going to be around.

 

This response from heels2u is spot on for my situation and how I feel.  I tend to wear more moderate boots and shoes and I am not very blatant about my heeling most of the time.  For work especially, I wear usually 2"-3.5" inch chunky heels and wedges that are rather stealthy to the casual observer.  I do the same if I am around any of my kids' friends.  I definitely do not want to embarrass my kids to their friends (as we all know how mean kids can be to each other).

 

When I am out on my own or with my wife, I do usually choose higher and more fem looking shoes, but I still would never wear brightly colored patent stilettos or anything even close to a strappy platform hooker shoe when I go out.  But I absolutely agree with heels2u, I often choose to tone down footwear based on where I will be, or who I will be with.

------------------------------------

Back to the original question:  My wife, my kids, and my siblings know, as well as some very select friends.  Most of them don't say much about it. I've had a few interesting questions over the years that are sometimes hard to answer.  My eldest sister does tease a little, but she has always been that way no matter what the topic is, its just her personality and I don't take offense to it.

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It was along time I didnt wear heels but sellers women and especially men have a little laugh when I talk them about my heels. I wear a discontinued pair of heels form call it pring. Model like meldina I removed the attach behind and painted the heel and made them larger. Usually I try to wear nice clothes. I dont like men sellers.

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  • 3 weeks later...

I find that for the most part most people don't really seem to care. I wear what most women wear in my area without any problems. However I can't seem to make that ultimate leap to just wear some of the more femme looking heels that I so adore. I have asked several women that I cme into contact with and they seen to have no problem with the look I project. I think that most of the problem that I have is within my own head due to the social scripting that was imposed from early life. Reading the posts here at HHP will help to build anyone's confidece, but only you can make that initial step.....sometimes I can make it work and others the monster in my head will just scare the life out of me. I'm at a point in my life where I just don't care what's others think I'm going to wear MY shoes and be happy with then time that I have left on this earth, we only get so many trips around the sun. So everyone should just enjoy the special gift that we have been given.....individuality, embrace it and live your life. Happy heeling !!!

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