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Confidence Levels In Summer Vs. Winter


mlroseplant

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I have noticed over the past two years that I tend to wear higher heels in the winter, which is counterintuitive. All of my boots are at least 4.25 inches, and many are 5+ inches high. I feel like I can wear them almost anywhere in almost any situation. However, I can't help but notice that my summer sandals are quite a bit lower, and I feel far less confident in them. Does anyone else feel the same?

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I don't feel any difference in confidence and my heel heights don't vary. I enjoy boots and clogs in the 2.5 to 4.0 inch heel height range in winter, and sandals in the same height range in the summer.

 

Interesting question, though. Let's see what others say...

 

Steve

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I used to feel like that too the first year I started wearing my heels in public, but during my second summer I started with flat strappy sandals and gradually progressed, and now I'll happily wear strappy sandals with heels just as high as my other shoes and boots. In some ways it's easier to wear the higher heels, I remember the first time I teetered around in my 4½" silver strappy sandals with red painted toes, the looks were definitely less "huh?" and more "wow!" which feels nice.

 

Maybe summer outfits are something to do with it too? I still feel a little less confident in the summer because I don't really have the delicate physique to wear skimpy summer outfits, especially tops, but it's easy to wear even dressy sandals with jeans and a light summer shirt. I've worn high sandals and mules with short skirts and bare legs in the summer, but it has to be a hot sunny day so that the look isn't out of place (just a bit unusual that a guy is wearing it).

If you like it, wear it.

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I don't know if it is confidence with me.  Maybe just a little.  I just find I can put together winter outfits with boots, no problem!  But when it comes to summer I have a hard time putting together outfits with stilettos and open toed shoes.

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Hmm! An interesting question. Looking back on things, I tend to think I felt more confident in the winter, wearing jeans, then long skirts and boots while summer attire was a little more challenging, especially when it came to wearing short skirts and sandals. But now, I have no problem whatsoever wearing miniskirts and sandals, in fact, I enjoy that combination!

I don't want to LOOK like a woman, I just want to DRESS like a woman!

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I haven't taken that step into heeled sandals, it hasn't interested me. But I do have a couple pairs of pumps. Every year after the snow melts I promise myself I'm gonna wear them more, and every year they find their way to the back of the closet. I can wear any type boot with any type of heel and werk it! But if I put on pumps I get so self conscious I can barely go outside.

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I am totally with you mlroseplant.  I am much more confident in the jeans and boots in winter and feel totally at ease dressed like that.  Even when the boot is fully exposed or worn over skinny jeans, I still just feel more secure with that look.

 

When its summer, I love wearing shorts, and do so pretty much every day for about 6-7 months continuously.  I do wear lower heels and sandals with the shorts, but I do feel quite self-conscious for some reason.  

 

I also don't really like the look of my feet all that much, so that probably has a lot to do with it, otherwise, I think I would probably wear strappy sandals much more often and my answer to this question would be different.

 

Of course I would love to be at the end of the spectrum where JeffB and some others are, and feel totally confident in skirts, or anything goes really for that matter.  But, I just don't see myself getting there any time soon.  Maybe eventually after I retire, I just won't give a crap anymore...  lol   :)

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After reading the replies and having given it some thought, I think it has something to do with society's idea of "manliness." When I'm in boots, tight jeans and a trenchcoat, I'm really only pushing one part of one envelope--the heels. When I'm wearing short shorts, shaved legs, with a fitted t-shirt and high heeled sandals, I'm pushing many envelopes as far as what people expect to see a man wearing. Perhaps this explains my general feeling of being more confident in the winter--I'm just less radical.

 

There are still some women out there who do not like to see a man wearing sandals of any sort, even the heavy, ugly, flat things that pass as acceptable footwear for men. I'll give them a small benefit of the doubt--most guys do not take care of their feet adequately, but I do.

 

On the other hand, even if I were a chick, wearing what I like to wear in the summer, I can imagine that I would still receive some unwanted attention.

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Interesting points Miroseplant,

Well were I am living there are fewer weeks in the year where I could wear sandals rather than boots or shoes. Confidence is less for sandals because just wear them less to begin with. With boots my heel heights do not reflect season differences, in fact I wear boots and heels much less in winter because I spend most of the winter in ski boots.

No heels in ski boots, dang! However when I was starting out with heel wearing that was a total different confidence level, then it was certainly heeled boots in cooler seasons.

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I also wear heels more in the cooler months. As most of my heels are boots or pumps and I wear them with boot cut jeans or dress slacks during the summer I usually wear shorts and have only worn pumps a few times

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I tend to wear thigh boots year round.  In winter it's with leggings, jeans, or skirts and in the summer it's with hose and shorts or skirts.  I have just started wearing flats (pumps with an 1/8" block heel), and I'll probably wear them much more in the summer.  I have never gotten into sandals.

I dream of a world where chickens can cross roads without having their motives questioned.

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  • 2 months later...

After reading the replies and having given it some thought, I think it has something to do with society's idea of "manliness." When I'm in boots, tight jeans and a trenchcoat, I'm really only pushing one part of one envelope--the heels. When I'm wearing short shorts, shaved legs, with a fitted t-shirt and high heeled sandals, I'm pushing many envelopes as far as what people expect to see a man wearing. Perhaps this explains my general feeling of being more confident in the winter--I'm just less radical.

 

There are still some women out there who do not like to see a man wearing sandals of any sort, even the heavy, ugly, flat things that pass as acceptable footwear for men. I'll give them a small benefit of the doubt--most guys do not take care of their feet adequately, but I do.

 

On the other hand, even if I were a chick, wearing what I like to wear in the summer, I can imagine that I would still receive some unwanted attention.

 

I agree entirely, miroseplant.   I like wearing sandals in the warmer weather, preferably the more open, strappy styles that would normally be considered somewhat feminine (although usually sold as unisex - particularly in my large size).   I would wear more specifically feminine sandals with flat or nearly flat heels if I could get them.  And I love feminine high heeled sandals - on women - but to move on up (literally) to wearing them myself is stretching my confidence (and tendons) too far.   Boots with heels and jeans - 'yes' (If not too blatant); high-heeled pumps or sandals - unfortunately 'no'!   That said, the idea of a pair of strappy 4" wedge mules is very enticing, so never say never. 

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Well, my heeling only includes boots, so I guess warmer temps in the summer curb my boot wearing somewhat. I don't wear shorts much, because I don't like the look/length of my legs, so still wear boots fairly often in the summer.

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  • 2 weeks later...

mlroseplant,

 

Good question and here's why I believe the perceptional difference between seasons. SInce most of the United States, northern Europe, and certainly of Canada have winters of sufficient severity that cause people to bundle up so they wear much more clothing than in more mild areas and the clothing tends to be in muted colors such as black, gray, brown, etc. The footwear tends to be closed toe and follow the same pattern. Even the vast majority of women I see in winter with their tucked boots tend to be wearing lower heels or flat boots and in the those same muted colors.

 When the warmer months arrive however the clothing layers get peeled back. More skin is revealed, the toes are exposed as closed toe styles give way to open-toe ones, and the colors which were more muted in the winter become much brighter to reflect the blooming flowers everywhere. If one paints their toenails then open-toe sandals naturally accent this effect. I believe most men are probably more conscious of this one particular aspect than the actual heels they may be wearing. It has happened to me just that way. I wore wedge sandals a number of places with the same jeans with a fall-color copper color polish and wasn't much noticed. As soon as I changed to a hot pink, metallic blue, or bright red then I got noticed much more readily wearing the same wedges and jeans.

You have worn heels a long time already so it shouldn't  matter but mentally it's still giving you an issue. This is where you just draw on that confidence within you. In the end it's your footwear and a splotch of paint and nobody else is adversely affected. Get out there and enjoy the warmer weather. It was another long severe winter in Wisconsin as I know it was in Iowa. HappyinHeels

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I only wear a heel boot or shoe so in the summer I have to wear something that is not too hot. This gets to be a problem as some shies I only wear with hose and some with socks.

I have one pair that is like a pump that I wear in the summer. It is open on the sides and has an ankle strap. I don't think I wore them at all last summer.

So summer or winter I wear jeans with my heels so there is really no change.

I don't ever expect to be to the point of wearing a heeled sandal

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On the other foot, I can't WAIT for warm weather to get here so I can wear heeled sandals! I probably have 40-50 pair. A few years ago I never wore sandals. Then I started experimenting and found I really love them! I even wear them inside in the winter time at home. But when spring is here, like it is today - shirtsleeve weather, partly sunny, breezy - I love my sandals. Most are in the 3-3.5 inch range in heel height, and most have a block or stacked heel, or a clog or wedge type of heel that is integral with the sole. Today, for example, I'm wearing Born "Timia" sandals in brown with a 3 inch heel. Very comfortable!

 

Steve

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  • 4 weeks later...

Since I only wear boots, my confidence level is much higher in winter than in summer time.  In winter days are shorter which means it is easier for me to disappear into darkness.  And colder temperatures mean people will be out and about in boots.  In summer time, days are longer and more people will be outside, meaning more people will see me in my high heeled boots.  And for me is just simply too hot for boots in summer, and I would feel out of place if everyone around me was wearing sandals and flip-flops.

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I used to have that problem, but I adapted to clogs and sandals. Try them. They're a great alternative to boots. Wear them under longish jeans if you're self-conscious about being seen. Sandals in particular are cool and comfortable and you can get styles such as White Mountain, Born, and other brands that have clog-like construction which isn't super femme. Two of many examples below.

 

Steve

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  • 2 weeks later...

It's cool enough in the summer to keep wearing jeans, my favorite attire with black mid-heel boots.

 

The winters here can get cold enough to forgo heeling altogether.  25 deg F (-4 C), not a problem.  When it drops to 10 below (-23 deg C), then any leather boot with socks will freeze your toes off in about half an hour.  Only insulated cold weather boots will work for any length of time.

 

One of my favorite things to do in the winter, during milder weather, obviously, is to head to one of the many coffee shops, pull up a bar stool or sit in a large stuffed chair and just read a good book.

Those who really care about us don't make a fuss about what we wear. Those who make a fuss about what we wear really don't care about us.

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Now that another summer is upon us, I've had another experience to share. Due to my job, I probabLy won't be wearing shorts out in public this year. I will be outside 60 hours a week in construction garb, which means my face, neck, and arms will be very dark, but my legs will be porcelain. Bad enough for a normal guy, but for a guy in short shorts and heels, uh.....no.

As an alternative, I tried skinny jeans instead of shorts. The effect was almost the same as wearing shorts. I get WAY more attention with skinny jeans than I do with boot cut jeans which somewhat cover the heels. I rather like the look of the skinny jeans, but I also like people to leave me the hell alone. We'll see how I feel in another few weeks.

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