hhlvr72 Posted February 15, 2012 Share Posted February 15, 2012 Hello, I am a straight guy who is happily married, but have had the urge to wear my Moms sandals since I can remember. I guess growing up with this urge is very similar among us that do it. I did it and loved it but then out grew my Moms shoes. Then as I got into high school I became ashamed of my urge and hid it away, but those feelings dont just go away. So I ended up with some flat 80's sandals hid in my closet that I got from a K-Mart out of town. I would wear them in my room and out in our barn and loved them but as you know one pair just wont do it. After graduationg high school I joined the military and moved to California. After moving there I could not help my self as much since no one knew me. I started buying and wearing womens shoes out in public. Most people never notice at and and with my love of nylons got to where I would wear them out at night. After moving home and getting married the shoes got pitched again and I vowed to never wear them again, but after only a few years of buying my wife every pair of heels that I could find I broke down and got some again. With the internet its much easier now and being able to buy shoes that really fit me. My only problem is that I have not shared this with my wife. I am afraid she is going to have seperating me wanting to wear womens shoes with being gay. We have discussed it in round about ways and she seems to think that way. I have one other little twist as well that I may as well mention. I have a crush fetish as well. Please understand I do not like even the thought of hard crush. People normally lump you in to that group if you like crush. I simply like to step on things that would get stepped on anyway. Like some dropped paper or food. I have no desire to hurt anything with a heartbeat.. Anyway that is me in a nut shell. I hope to meet some people with the same passion for shoes that I have. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mike Hinch Posted February 15, 2012 Share Posted February 15, 2012 While I really do not like to insult anyone with a one line reply I do not have much time just now. Also that is a good idea to go at it in a round about way. The place where I hang out I mentioned to the owner how I disliked those baggy pants that some guys wore around town and I said they looked sloppy and I would rather wear a skirt. That got some hostility to the idea. My self spared but as one can guess I will not come around the shop in one of my skirts. As for high heels I have already received some FLAK over that. As for the wife I have two suggestions one is your round about and the other is to start the heels with the most conservative non girly guy safe and see how that goes. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shafted Posted February 15, 2012 Share Posted February 15, 2012 Hello and welcome hhlvr72. Shafted, the boots that is! View my gallery here http://www.hhplace.o...afteds-gallery/ or view my heeling thread here http://www.hhplace.org/topic/3850-new-pair-of-boots-starts-me-serious-street-heeling/ - Pm me if you want fashion advice or just need someone to talk to. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FreshinHeels Posted February 15, 2012 Share Posted February 15, 2012 Hello and welcome to HHplace. That is is difficult predicament you're in. I had a somewhat simular situation at hand (the thread about it should be around somewhere) but in the end every situation is different from the other. You've come to a good place where people can give you good advice if needed. In the process of becoming the person I always was...but didn't dare to let her come out Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bubba136 Posted February 16, 2012 Share Posted February 16, 2012 Welcome to hhplace, hhlvr72 . Reading your introduction I believe you are in for some anxious moments before you straighten this out. Do you know what your wife's attitude toward men wearing apparel styled for women is? If you do, you should already have an idea of how she will react if you suddenly tell her about your desire to wear heels. If you don't, perhappe you should explore her attitude before approaching her. In any event, you're caught I the middle because your desire towear heels will never go away. Being mentally comfortable in your own mind is the key to wearing heels in public. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stilettopete Posted February 16, 2012 Share Posted February 16, 2012 Hello and welcome. Hope things go okay for you and yours. You'll get good advice here. "You put high heels on and you change" M. Blahnik Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
yozz Posted February 16, 2012 Share Posted February 16, 2012 Hi hhlvr72, Welcome to hhplace and the many people who have shared your predicament. If you have no idea what the reaction of your wife will be and you want to try it out, take one microstep. More than a year before I told my wife I got her used to the idea of me wearing tights. This went kind of by accident. I had some irritaion problems between my legs and I told her that at home I preferred to not wear heavy pants. So one day the bright idea was to try out -just to not be cold- what some warm tights would be like. Of course, considering the possibilities here, it had to be a success. This is one way to turn a necessity into a virtue.... Considering that it made me comfortable, my wife thought also that it was a good idea that at home I walked around like that. They were 120 denier and opaque, but they really were comfortable. Over the year I started wearing them more and more under my pants when going to work. By the time I told her I was rather jealous about her nice high heel boots, she was already fully used to the idea of the tights and that those at least did not make me gay. Of course, maybe at the shoes department you can be a bit slower as well, but that depends on the circumstances. If for instance you have very small feet, it makes often sense to shop for some very neutral shoes in the women department. That avenue is not open when you have very big feet. I am not saying you should do exactly like I did. I just want to indicate that it can be quite a project, and that you have to be creative and use whatever opportunity presents itself. There are those who advocate the 'hard line': be direct and upfront. But as you indicate, you run the risk of a very adverse reaction, and you may not be prepared to pay that price. That is why I think it is better to try little steps and see who things develop. Just in case you are curious how my story ends. I told my wife and of course she started to ask the canonical questions: whether I was gay, whether I wanted to become a woman, etc. And I told her no on both and she realized that her knowledge about it did not change who I was and I was still the same person whom she loved. Later she also started seeing the developing pattern and that she had been wondering at times but could not really say what it was exactly. She has fully accepted things and we like to go shopping together. In short: happy end. If you are careful, probably you can have a happy end as well. Y. Raise your voice. Put on some heels. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
roniheels Posted February 19, 2012 Share Posted February 19, 2012 Welcome to High Heel Place. Several of us have been in your situation and it is not an easy resolution. I have always preached honesty is the best policy, but also discretion is the better part of valor. I tried to hide my enjoyment of high heels from my ex, and when finally confronted, the results were not happy. Read through many of the post concerning this subject and you can get many good suggestions. Good luck and welcome again. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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