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Best type for heeling without attention?


Slide

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What type of heels are the best for heeling in long blue jeans, without causing any attention. I'm still new at this and still need to build my confidence. I have a pair of the menswear "wingtip" style with about a 3" heel, they are OK, I also have a pair of clogs, that would be great but my pants leg gets caught on the back "showing the full heel". I thought a pair of MUDD wedge. Any other ideas, send pics. Thanks for your help...

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Slide –

Welcome to the forum.

One of the greatest tragedies of modern science is when beautiful theories are destroyed by ugly facts. How does this relate to heeling? Theory: Wearing long slacks will hide my heels and no one will notice. Fact: Yes they will.

You say you are new to heeling and haven’t built up your confidence; however, this is not a step you can avoid. You really need to select something that you think looks good on you. You need to really believe that what you are wearing looks good. If you do that, then what others think is no longer an issue. You believe you look good and you can present yourself with that belief. Others will recognize that confidence and respect it.

However is you still want to try to hide your heels, I recommend a quiet heel, one that doesn’t make a lot of noise when it strikes the ground. I’ve noticed the sound of the heels seems to unnerve new heelers more than anything else.

The most important this is… enjoy your heels. :chuckle:

I dream of a world where chickens can cross roads without having their motives questioned.

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Crazyewok, I see you joined our group so welcome aboard! About being able to go out with your heels...you are ABLE but are UNWILLING at this point in your life because you have the perception society...all those that might pass you or see you...aren't ready to see a guy in heels. Was society ready to see women trade dresses for pants? To see tattoos on women's ankles or backs? The world evolves and always does whether some are ready or not. There is no law in the UK, USA, Brazil, Thailand, or Australia to name a sampling that prohibits you from wearing a "woman's" shoe or a woman from wearing a man's shirt. There are those that will try to blend in with long pants over low heels and others that will wear girls' cropped jeans with 5 or 6 inch heels and not care. Those that say something will undoubtedly be women and it'll be positive or the few that laugh and say something nasty show what jerks they are and you can turn it right back at them. Life is a 75-80 year experience on average so get the most out of it. Best wishes to you from Wisconsin.

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Great answer HF. Also the best way not to get noticed, no matter what kind of heels your wearing, is to just be yourself and don't think about what your wearing. It's all about attitude. Pretend your wearing your favorite tennis shoes. It's when you get nervous people start to notice. I was in line for the check out at sears last night wearing my new mary janes and looked down at a guy in front of me wearing RED patent leather tennis shoes. Made me feel real comfortable inside. Now I wouldn't be caught dead in red patent leather tennis shoes and I'm sure he felt the same way about my footwear. So really, what difference does it make what shoes you wear?

real men wear heels

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Slide, It really is mostly a mind game. You do have to be comfortable, physically and mentally, with what you are wearing on your feet. If you're nervous, it will show, people will pay attention, and it will make you more nervous! If you are confident, people won't pay any attention, and if they do, chances are good you'll get a compliment. Confidence is sexy and if you have the courage to wear what a man might not ordinarily wear, then you're one cool dude! So go for it. I happen to like mules and clogs most myself. If your pants are getting caught between your heel and the shoe, they probably aren't long enough. Look into boot cut legs - they are made with a little flare and fall over the heel of any shoe very nicely. You can find more boot cut styles in women's pants than men's. Try JC Penney for example. Their service is top notch, and you can buy online if you want privacy, plus you can return anything you buy. Good luck! Steve

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Greetings Slide,

I know how feel and you can overcome this. I was wearing a pair 5" wedge boots out a a mall the other day and they have a cork heel. They are quiet, but the mall was busy with many folks nobody noticed, could have worn a heel that made more noise. However I am already 5'11" and those boots put me well into the second floor from the first floor. But I just did what I wanted to do and nobody gave a hoot. So the point is a quiet wedge heel with boot cut jeans it will go unnoticed, once you get there and have done that, move to a different heel. The next day I wore a pair of knee high 3.5" heeled boot from Gaborit which sounded more like a cowboy boot, nobody saw them. So get your comfort level up and experiment. It works, to play in the field you got to know the field. Persist! it is an awesome feeling to heel in Public.Hope it goes well,

Mtnsofheels

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Slide,

A big welcome to the board from me too.

You ask a very good question and all above is good advice with which I concur.

As to the type of shoe, then the height is one consideration. As you are starting out on this wonderful experience, I would suggest 3" be the best to get going. You will still have plenty of flexibility in your ankle to allow for slopes and so on without causing you to stumble. 3" is a height that you almost don't notice, yet you get almost the full benefit of the height of the heel. THus you will walk quite confidently which is essential and also be comfortable. This is the height of heel that I wear almost every day.

Next you should consider the style of the heel. Personally I would recommend a block style that is no smaller than 1" at the heel tip. This gives both stability and also is typically less feminine, rather more utilitarian. The heel top which is usually hard plastic can be replaced with a rubber one so it is far less noisy.

Finally the style of the whole shoe should be considered in relation to the whole outfit. With jeans the best option, IMHO, is a pair of ankle boots, brown or black as these are the expected colours. An almond or rounded toe is better. Try to avoid overly feminine toe styles as this will also help with your comfort level. This style is commonly worn by women in their daily activities, so you will have plenty of choice.

This will get you going and out there with the rest of us. Then as both confidence and comfort increase, you can introduce the more feminine styling to the toe/heel if you wish.

The real key is to not go out in too high a heel regardless of the style and also picking appropriate footwear for the outfit/time of day/occasion, just as the ladies do.

As far as I am concerned, any slingback style is not suitable for trousers/pants and should only be worn with a skirt precisely becuase they constantly get hung up between your heel and the shoe. That is my opinion of course.

These are a perfect example from my photo ablum. I wore these until they literally fell apart. A sad day.

http://www.hhplace.org/picture.php?albumid=68&pictureid=861

Enjoy.

Simon.

Are you confusing me with someone who gives a damn?

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  • 2 weeks later...

Thanks, I'm gettin there. My wife and I were out of town, and ended up at a mall (Imagine that!). She said "Oh, don't let me forget to get some hose before we leave." When we got to Macy's she said Do you need any? I told her I needed some black ones." She picked them out. No problem. When we left the store she asked if I wanted to wear them, So I went to the restroom and put them on. As we passed the shoe stores, she then asked if I wanted to look. I told her only if she wanted to. So we went in and she found a pair and asked me if I liked them? I said yes they were nice, She found my size and told me to try them on. So far I have only been able to courage up enough to try one on, and never both and walked around. Maybe some day.....!

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Great story! Some guys would give anything for spousal support and encouragement like that. You are one lucky guy. Take baby steps with her; make progress every time and pretty soon you'll be street heeling fearlessly. Thanks for sharing your experience! Steve

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You are a lucky man to have the support of your wife like you do. Hopefully you will take the next step and heel in public and hopefully your wife will support you on this too. I guarentee you will feel such a thrill the first time you wear high heels in public. Good luck.

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