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Childhood Lives as boys


frodo220

Guys, what kind of gender confusing situations did you grow up with?  

131 members have voted

  1. 1. Guys, what kind of gender confusing situations did you grow up with?

    • Complimented on eyelashes by mother or sister, as they envied them.
      19
    • Complimented on finger (and/or toe) nails or hands (and/or feet), as they envied them.
      6
    • Asked to wear/model a female garment by a seamstress (mother or sister) for fitting.
      5
    • One or more sisters favorites of parents, you always "misbehaved".
      4
    • Passive Agressive Father
      7
    • Passive Agressive Mother
      4
    • One or more parents alcoholic
      6
    • Called names, picked on inside and outside home, and advice given was to "take it" like a man.
      16
    • Mother (or sisters) wore makeup all the time and kissed you on lips.
      5
    • Ultrasensitive to being touched.
      11
    • Called "fatty" or "skinny" or variant by family.
      8
    • Chewed fingernails.
      21
    • Picked nose.
      17
    • Parents allowed you being slapped by another parent or sisters, and if you hit back you were punished (the one who slapped you was not).
      6


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All,

I am curious about the childhood upbringing us guys had as we were growing up. A few of these features I experienced myself.

Frodo

Hi,

I had a pretty unremarkable 1970's one. No major trauma's that I can recall.

My pet rabbit died. My dad painted his Mini purple.

Those were probably the highlights ;-)

Always High-Heel Responsibly

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Your list may have some elements that could be applied to my growing up if some of the descriptions were stretched to include some unlisted points, but this looks like another interrogation to categorize us into the present social norms that are terribly inadequate and/or incorrect to prove that males can't have feminine traits or that females lack any traits of masculinity on their own. Did I have struggles to make me a better person? Maybe not as hard as some people, but they were my problems to deal with. When did I know I had interest in wearing "feminine" footwear? I can't remember a time I didn't have this desire in my life, which was magnified due to being denied my right to exercise my agency to choose the footwear I wanted. My social upbringing didn't cause me to want to wear heels, in fact, the constant social attitude made me feel like an implanted alien from another planet, because I wanted to wear black patent leather Mary Janes and the 4" stiletto court shoes early in my young life. To make it clearer, my desire to heel is an extention of who I am. All the things that could be on your list may have been areas to deal with, but they weren't and aren't me. On this basis, I can not vote in your poll for none of the selections made me or caused me to be a heeler.

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No, it was not a scientific poll or that complicated. It was designed just to see what people had more in common, regarding treatment of them while growing up because they are/were different. If you want to add more aspects, put up your own poll, and check it out. Also, it makes no sense to call it an interrogation as by design it is a poll that is anonymous. One thing I realized just by looking at the prelim results, 55% of those answered "chewed their fingernails" or had a woman compliment "eyelashes" on them. I have learned over the years when women do that to boys, it is a form of abuse, as the boys do not know what it means or why someone would care about it. In a way it is just like some women who would be upset with shoes you decide to wear, as if it really matters. Ugh!

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I think the eyelash thing is just one of the many ironies of nature. Women want lush eyelashes so men, (most of whom do not care) have them. Nature is perverse sometimes. I don't see that any of your options apply to me either. Further, I do not make the connection between them and heels. I think I started noticing heels about the same time I started noticing girls. I had an extra level of curiosity, wondering what it would be like to wear those interesting shoes.

Have a happy time!

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Do you have the results of this poll taken on a control group, randomly selected from the general population at large? If not, then while it may tell us a bit about us male heelers, it says nothing about how we differ from the non-heeling male public. I wouldn't mind seeing the results of a poll taken on the male public at large which slipped in a few questions about if they'd ever worn heels, what kind, and why.

Those who really care about us don't make a fuss about what we wear. Those who make a fuss about what we wear really don't care about us.

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I think the eyelash thing is just one of the many ironies of nature. Women want lush eyelashes so men, (most of whom do not care) have them.

Nature is perverse sometimes.

I don't see that any of your options apply to me either. Further, I do not make the connection between them and heels.

I think I started noticing heels about the same time I started noticing girls. I had an extra level of curiosity, wondering what it would be like to wear those interesting shoes.

Nah, there was never any pretense of connections between the questions and "heels", other than gender confusion issues forced on boys as they are growing up. Obviously some guys had that experience, I did, my Mother (who taught my sisters) had an extreme hatred and envy of men, she always seemed to think they needed "fixing". So I so much wanted to be "left alone" or treated well, I thought "going along" with the "abuse" would make them happier, and found out the contempt grew worse. Listening to Dr. Laura on the radio, http://www.drlaura.com/listen helped me finally to understand what was going on.

How guys cope with those issues from "above" is interesting, and some can be described as "annoying" by the general population. And yet it is also interesting how particularly "annoying" behaviors that really do not matter to boys/guys like biting nails (out of nervousness perhaps) or picking nose (due to allergies keeping nostrils full) is often viewed by girls as very annoying whereas the guys see it as practical. As blowing the nose does not get the dried stuff out. So, that is kind of a measure of whether the guy cares or not how annoying girls view him or not. Kind girls never seemed to notice it or mind.

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none of the above is my answer. i did have a hankering for taking moms boots out her closet and prancing around in them when i could,though. does that count at all?

Sure, but that answer for this poll is "too simple". :winkiss: As it seems very surface, the poll was designed to look for deeper influences (if any).

Why not do your own poll with a list of responses from your perspective? My point of this was to get guys thinking about possible connections (if any).

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the poll looks a bit like a lot what a shrink or non-fetishist would come up with. since wearing heels for males,in their eyes,is abnormal they would endevour to discover what underlying factors triggered the behavior. so i am a bit dubious about it now that i really look at it. i firmly believe the reason i do it was already there when i hit the chute. and i am corfortable enough with it in my middle age that i dont need to transfer any blame for it on my parents,society,etc.

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the poll looks a bit like a lot what a shrink or non-fetishist would come up with. since wearing heels for males,in their eyes,is abnormal they would endevor to discover what underlying factors triggered the behavior. so i am a bit dubious about it now that i really look at it. i firmly believe the reason i do it was already there when i hit the chute. and i am comfortable enough with it in my middle age that i dont need to transfer any blame for it on my parents,society,etc.

Well said, crotchboots. It makes a lot of sense not to spend a great deal of time trying to analyze why. If you are like most of us it wouldn't matter one bit because you can't quit wearing heels, anyway. Might be able to suppress the desire for a few months -- or even a year or so. However, the desire will return and eventuall you will sucumb.

Being mentally comfortable in your own mind is the key to wearing heels in public.

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  • 1 month later...

Hello to all, When I was growing up in rural Kentucky I had two older sisters that used to fuss over my eyelashes and older brothers that made fun of me being chubby. Needless to say I spent a great deal of time fighting and getting some trips behind the barn for a spanking. I had no problems busting my brothers upside their head my sisters were a different story. We were raised to respect women and girls and that it does not take a man to beat up a woman. About all I could do with them is hide their bra or jam their dressers drawers shut. Then they usually would catch me when my guard was down and paint my face with makeup and put me in a dress. Know the funny thing is all my brothers are fatter than I am and my sisters always need me to fix their cars . The good news is my sisters like shopping with me for high heels. On a side note, I've kept them out of some pretty ugly shoes........Thank goodness!!!

I have been Banned for emailing abuse to tech when he tried to help me.

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It is attempt to see if there are any commonalities, stereotypical or otherwise. The results have been interesting.

How is it interesting when the answers dont even relate to the question?

Being called a fatty, or picking your nose has no relation to gender confusion, and Gender confusion surveys have no relation to a heels fashion website.

Heels for Men // Legwear Fashion // HHPlace Guidelines

If something doesn't look right, please report the content ASAP!

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How is it interesting when the answers dont even relate to the question?

Being called a fatty, or picking your nose has no relation to gender confusion, and Gender confusion surveys have no relation to a heels fashion website.

They all have to do the way guys look at themselves, as guys and then as men. I was curious if there were any commonalities. If you think this poll is so pointless, feel free to close it and the thread. I do not mind. I find more interesting how many views it had and how many did NOT vote.
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Perhaps, as it is in my case, there aren't any responses that apply to the person that doesn't vote ?

Being mentally comfortable in your own mind is the key to wearing heels in public.

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All,

I am curious about the childhood upbringing us guys had as we were growing up. A few of these features I experienced myself.

Frodo

I had a totally regular childhood, no dramas, rock steady parents, normal school life, could be described as boring.....so no problems in the past at all....so.....Why do I wear HH boots??.......come to that what motivates any of us to wear HH's???
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i am sorry,but polls like this annoy the hell(and heel) out of me. it seems like a thinly disguised attempt to find a scapegoat/reason for wanting to wear heels. why does one need that? even if any of the listed reasons was valid,what is point at this late date? if the bug has bitten you,your done. and i dont care who's fault it is...what are you gonna do with it now....hide your head in ground like an ostrich or embrace it and get as much enjoyment out of it as you can? now thats the kind of pollcat question i would like to be asked...

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i am sorry,but polls like this annoy the hell(and heel) out of me. it seems like a thinly disguised attempt to find a scapegoat/reason for wanting to wear heels. why does one need that? even if any of the listed reasons was valid,what is point at this late date? if the bug has bitten you,your done. and i dont care who's fault it is...what are you gonna do with it now....hide your head in ground like an ostrich or embrace it and get as much enjoyment out of it as you can? now thats the kind of pollcat question i would like to be asked...

The whole point is to address stereotypes people may have or misconceptions. What is clear from the poll is that it is a LOT more complicated than such stereotypes. How else is one going to disprove stereotypes, then address them HEAD on?!

If you want to set up your own poll, DO IT!

Frodo

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bravo,frodo. your viewpoint is noted. and now for something completely different.... and as for you johnieheel...did any ever tell you that you where a smartass? and i bet your reply was that it was better than being a dumbass....rotflmao....

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Just being truthfull. My childhood life had nothing to do with my passion for wanting to wear girl shoes. If my dad or brothers ever found out, they would have never let me live it down and would make sure all my friends knew about it. I kept it hid for many many years and now that we are all older and more mature, both my brothers except me as I am. heels and all. Don't know exactly what your looking for but thats my answer and I'm sticking to it.

real men wear heels

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Ditto, BR. Nothing really stands out as "driving" me to wear heels. I simply was attracted to heels, both looking at them and trying them on.

Those who really care about us don't make a fuss about what we wear. Those who make a fuss about what we wear really don't care about us.

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