Ruby Slipper

Dr.1819 I really like your letter. Very straight to the point but sensitive. It's a hard decision. My insticts are screaming what you are saying with the whole he is struggling with telling me. How does a person know when its the right time to bring something like this up? What if I do it too soon and he freaks and runs? Do I wait until he is ready? What will that do to me? Ladies who have gone through this, any advice? Why cant men just talk? Especially with a person they know is 100% devoted and in love with them. Do you mind if I keep your letter? I think I could use it for support for myself. Maybe I should just take the plunge.

Micha I think you misunderstood. I am fine with his heel and stocking thing...there could be a lot worse things he could be hidding from me...like killing baby animals which is an extreme. I was trying to say it would take a lot to make me not want to be with him or think he was freak. And who said anything about pedophiles? I never accused my Fella of having that issue. I dont have any issues with gay men or woman...really I'm not here to offend...just to learn new stuff, met new people and understand. There are so many different people in the world, I feel I would be missing out if I sheltered myself from what new experiences could offer. I'm pretty opened minded and I'm sorry if you were offended in any way. Thanks Dawn. It's funny you should mention the near future. He seems to have a lot on his mind lately so maybe you are right...maybe the bean spilling will happen soon. I almost just came out and said something this weekend but I dont think its a good time. There is something in the air and I think if I asked him about it, fuel would just be added to the fire. Everyone is great here!!

Hi All, Exactly what Chris said is what I want to do. I'm not sure if I want to see him in heels. I dont know if that would get me hot or not. But, I do want him to know I love and support him and accept all the facets of his personality...unless he tortures baby animals or something...that would be a problem. lol. I havent said anything yet. I just dont have the balls and I am so worried he will get defensive and shut me out...no matter how sensitive and understand I try to be. One day at a time I guess. The weekend was good. We went shoe shopping and he spent more time looking for me (we know differently) then himself. He really inspected some adorable Jessica Simpson-like platforms...I mean picking them up and looking at the construction and quality. He was looking for a pair of mens sneakers and could find anything. As we were looking at the womans sneaks we both saw a pair we liked. To me they looked pretty unisex. He said he liked them and wished they were mens. I right away said, who cares? Who will know? He said other girls. I looked at the sizes and they had his size. I asked him do you think you could wear an 11? Just try them on. No one would be able to tell they are girls. You really couldnt. I thought about going back and buying them like some of you guys suggested. I'm not sure if that would be pushing it. He didnt try them on. His loss I guess since he is the one desperate for new sneakers. This is something different but along the same lines. I mentioned before he likes stockings...so I took it a little further to see his reaction and to let him know I'm open minded to different things. I asked him to put on a pair of my silky jeweled thongs. I said I want to see what its like and see how he feels in them. He kind of laughed and said, wouldnt that freak and gross you out?? I told him I dont think so or I wouldnt be asking him to do it and it might really turn me on. We didnt get around to it last weekend but it has been brough up a few times this week and he is willing to do it. Is this a good sign to other things coming out? The more I think about it...yeah, I'd like to see his stuff in my thong. We shall see. Maybe I will grow a pair and just tell him I know he wears womans shoes and I love him and let me in. We can talk about anything...let's talk about this too!

Oh!! We are going shopping tomorrow. Shoes are on the list so maybe something will happen there! I must admit he is the best person to go shopping with...better than ANY of my girlfriends! He knows exactly what I'm looking for and what looks good. He's looking for shoes too...men sneakers but I bet we'll spend more time looking at shoes for me! Bye!

This has already been a big help. I'm headed to his place for the weekend and I'm going to pay closer attention to things. Just reading what everyone has to say has put me at ease and given me some understanding. Le752! Wow!! I read your first post of your old thread and you and I could have lived the exact experience!!! I feel such relief that I'm not the only one to discover the shoe thing. He was using my computer to look at size 11 shoes on ebay and he sells and buys tons on ebay. He even once bought me a pair of shoes that didnt fit and "returned" them (resold them on ebay) I saw them sell (without him knowing) and a week later he sold the exact same pair in a different size (his) He bought us the same pair of shoes! It made me giggle. I wasnt mad or freaked. I agree with Johnieheel about not waiting until marriage is approached be bring up his secret. If he ever asks me I've already thought that if the subject hadnt been brough up yet that that would have to be the time. I've always thought he would ask me to marry him but now I'm not sure. I cant imagine hidding something for so long and then bringing a person into your life and living space and trying to keep up the sexy heel wearing or giving it up or just out of the blue telling the other person. I'm afraid I will lose him if I push the topic. I'm guessing he must feel shame or guilt for liking to wear womans articles...the way society is. I'm going to watch, listen and feel out the situation a little bit longer before I do anything. And I'm going to read, read and read some more of the post here and the great link that was provided...passionforfootwear. I feel the more knowledge I have the easier it will be to say, "tell me about your ladies shoes." I'm just so curious!! Oh, and he has mentioned me wearing stockings before because the feel soooooo good to touch. Just last week he had me dress up in stockings and 4 inch patten leather peek-a-boo heels. Sometimes when he gets me all dressed up I wonder if its me thats getting him going or the shoes and stockings? I dont want to feel like an object, you know? I wont be back until Monday. I very well can't check the hhplace at his house...or should I...I'll save that for a future visit! This has been so positive and really made my day! Have a great weekend everyone! Thanks so much! Ruby

Thank you both. The funny thing is, I think I'm cool with the shoe thing. I just want him to tell me about it. What do I do if I tell him I have an idea about what he is doing and he repeatedly denies it? I dont want him to freak and me drive him away. How long should I wait before I address the issue? I just want to reasure him that I absolutely adore him...I mean I want to have his babies for crying out loud! So this shoe thing shouldnt prevent him from living happily ever after with me This is all a very new experiece for me...the last thing I ever thought I would have to deal with in a relationship...and it seems like it could be harmless. He LOVES it when I dress up in heels and prance for him and I like to do it....makes me feel hot. He has great taste too! Anyone been approached by a gf or wife in a way they wish was different? Tips on how I should do it? I want to do this in the most kind and nonconfrontation way possible! Thank you! Thank you!

Hi. I know this section is for guys but I hope you can give me some insite. My boyfriend of over a year secretly buys and sells woman shoes on ebay. I didnt quite understand what it was about. They were never in my size. Then I saw when he was selling a pair I could tell it was him wearing them with stockings. I was alittle shocked. Not grossed out or anything. Just curious. I dont know anything about this stuff. I tried asking him about it but it is very akward for both of us. I mentioned at one point that I knew he was buying womans shoes that were not in my size and asked him if he were cheating on me. He got a little hot but kept his cool and insisted he wasnt cheating on me (I knew this) but wouldnt come out and answer why he was buying these shoes. Finally all he could say was, "It's nothing you have to worry about." I believe him. I just want to know more. Why? How long? What does it mean? I'm very curious and want to understand. Can you guys give me some insight and advice. I feel he is keeping something serious from me. Should I know about this? Should he tell me? How are we to have a future together if he can not be honest with me. I've been searching for anything online to help me understand. I found this site and it's been great reading your post and seeing he is not a freak or gay. Please understand, I do not want to offend. I love him and want us to trust in each other completely. I never thought it was odd he like going shoe shopping with me or buying me shoes...I just thought this was a bonus for me Sorry this was so long. Thanks, for listening. Ruby